ImActuallyAHobbitPleaseTeleportMeToMiddleEarth
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Furry funny Friday
Sep 30, 2016 6:23 PM
ImActuallyAHobbitPleaseTeleportMeToMiddleEarth
265334
13085
189
INeedAnUserNameButNoneIsFree
#10 We need to talk. I know I should've told you this earlier... I am not a dog. I am a cat. Don't be mad, don't be sad. I still love you.
PreciousPotato
#6 That's a cat's first instinct, too. *runs after cat
SpoonerGibbs
Thank you for not demanding up-votes. Here is your up-vote.
MyUsernameHasTheBestWords
I do #6 except with the wild chickens on campus. "Hi mama, hi little ones!" oh crap, a person... *walks silently looking straight ahead*
markokralji
the fifth picture of the dog eating a lemon reminds me of wallace and gromet
boogiemanspud
Wow, pic $1 is probably $9k worth of pups. We wanted one so bad but couldn't find anyone with any litters.
WhatTheActualDucks
A squirrel that has mastered water bending? that's nuts.
mellowmadre
I upvoted after the first pic. I wasn't disappointed with the rest. If I had another upvote, it would be yours friend.
Thorgrim182
Is an optician really just called "eye doctor" in the US?
Asteroidrules
#1 that's parenting in a nutshell right there.
Vlascia
#1 is exactly how I was 6 months ago. Was up for almost 60 hours between labor, delivery, and 48 hour hospital stay, apart from maybe.. 1/2
Vlascia
one hour of sleep total. Was wide awake and couldn't stop looking at my daughter. And I don't drink coffee or anything caffeinated. 2/2
IdleReprieve
I said good day!
WillemHellfire
I needed this after the Syrian baby. Imgur, my love knows no bounds.
POYZN
i lost it at the dog's sneeze face
Gasmonkeyfrank
That's a lot o' puppies to feed.....does she have enough nipples?
ASmellofWineandCheapPerfume
MrPredator
ChainsawHandsJoe
#1 They came out of me. They came... Out of me...
rubix7
Huffkey
Munchman347
Nine pups, eight titties, no tit for tat...
COOL69GUY420ZONE
#1 I see nipple
AccountCreatedToUpdogVotes
You did it wrong. @iseenipple
SmergTheDargon
Stensticles
i went back to look...
COOL69GUY420ZONE
analnipple666
Like at least 3
KomodoKill
And the 9gag ... But it's so cute ... I think we should forgive @op
jt005
KixPanganiban
#4 haha nice try fuckwad, it has batteries!
Riyakou
Well if you wanna go that route...
Siwieweah
#9 looks like a fiberian hufsky
phoenixgrinder
that first one birthed 140% her body weight in doggos
DanielGayLewis
Puppers*
60FPSDoggo
Mini-doggos
jarjarbinkswasthebestcharacterinstarwars
Is that many pups normal for a corgi?
troublecliff
What's a doggo?
MilesMate
Well they grow
meanpantscaitie
She has postpartum depression.
Equreuil
As a mom who had that... yeah... there were times where I'd simply stare at my son instead of sleep while "WTF" played on repeat in my head
hotelcoffee
I don't understand how she could of had 9 puppies that's cray
cakesandwhiskey
could have*
FuckComicSans
*puppers
NUMBERTHEDAMNPICTURES
#1
revcleo
That bitch will have sore nipples.
Vlascia
^·θ Took me like 6-8 wks
hereforcake
Ehh...nipples only take a couple days to acclimate. Source: am using nipples for similar purposes.
rukeman
You have puppies?
TheLastBillyBumbler
Squats, yo.
zenatsu
"You fucks better be worth it"
venomkiller69
That's what my mom said when she had me haha
ICOPPEDTHISHOUSE
Me too hahah right guys? Guys?
ForeverVoteless
You weighed ~300kg when you were born?
SpecialProjectY
Explains why you can put both hands in he's mom and applaud.
DarkCrawler901
No shit she is staring at them. "THESE CAME OUT OF ME?! HOW?! THAT IS WAY TOO MUCH LIVING THINGS TO COME OUT OF ONE LIVING THING"
corditedelite
Those are def not 1 week old puppers
HantCampNFesh
Didn't say one week old. Just said they were had "this week".
DefinitelyNotAShark
Also please don't lift puppies around before they walk and see properly. Stresses them the fuck out.
E2THEGZ
Ya for sure.
BunnyliciousBubblegum
This is a Friday dump I can get with.
RaynWisp
Your mother doesn't count?
Sarcee
+1 but the frog-spider man one bugs me. I feel like lots of people think the Spider Man pic is also a frog, when it is clearly a lizard.
ghostanom
Thank you, it ground my gears.
Chakrabrah
You're a god damn hero..
AtMyDootiest
I agree. Calling a bearded dragon a frog is messed up.
thedoe
Must admit it bothered me too.
mgeist12
Neither of them have fur
celestedrake
Maybe that's the suit.
CarrionDoll
Mine too, definitely a beardie.
EyeHateYouAll
It's a Mwanza Flat Headed Agama from Africa. Beardies are Australian.
PenisOfDeath
Sounds like a high level RPG monster
SmergTheDargon
The Mwanza Flat Headed Agama attacks you with its massive biological misrepresentation in the post. Take 4d6 psychic damage.
Serpiko
So not only did he become spiderman but also a lizard!! That's even more amazing.
SickLikeMe187
He is one of his own worst enemies.
PenisOfDeath
Wasn't really paying attention but your comment made me double check. Definitely a lizard
SomeCrazyNerd
I thought that was a poison dart frog OMG!
MurderBear628
It's actually called a Spider-Man agama, pretty neat little guy.
GrouchyOscar
I think the point is the frog should've also been a lizard, or the lizard a frog with those colors
Sarcee
Huh, neat! The frog lizard thing still stands, but I had no idea that a lizard species had such a cool name! +1
COOL69GUY420ZONE
I woke up last night to my cat crawling into the crook of my arm and she stayed their the rest of the night. Gosh I love that cat.
LifeDoctor
Hey, are we the same person?
deltajesus
One of my cats used to like curling up underneath the blanket with me in the winter.
RalphysMom
I was cuddling with my cat until he sat on my hand and made it smell like ass.
Leinad199
I went for a nap the other day and woke up on my side with my kitten curled up along my chest and my older cat stretched out along my back.
zeradeth
my cat is currently cuddling with me right now. has been for the last hour or so. he's totally chill, best cat I've ever had.
IBlowForALiving
Well, if I were with you right now, I'd cuddle you too.
ASmellofWineandCheapPerfume
Mine will actually let me hold her tail when she does that; my 30 year old version of a security blanket!!
COOL69GUY420ZONE
YOUR CAT IS 30 OMG HOW?!
TheAltAccount
Biotechnology.
ASmellofWineandCheapPerfume
LOL, I meant my version of a security blanket as a 30 year old woman.. they sure are sweet little assholes [the cats] when they wanna be!!
COOL69GUY420ZONE
I always upvote sweet little assholes.
ASmellofWineandCheapPerfume
This is one time I don't mind saying - the more little assholes, the better!
Bladedrummer
When you really want to be a good boyfriend but for whatever reason it tastes nasty.
AgDrumma07
Ayyyyy
DishonorablyDischargedGrammerNazi
"But ya gotta eat tha booty like groceries...."
LeftHandPanda
That middle one on the bottom
TheSublimeGoose
How I look when someone points a camera at me.
Bladedrummer
The more I look at it, the more I laugh.
SolidKoolaid
Good to know I'm not the only one.
nakedangel
I'm so very tired of vaginas being equated to fish, the ocean or whatever other vulgarities people can think of to be fallacious and mean.
bigfloppydonkydong
You do realize that unclean nasty vag does sometimes smell like fish .. riight? Some women have horrible hygiene.
shorr
But it's getting old to see the fish/pennies equation the second someone talks about cunnilingus. Everyone has taste/odour
KjTheLightning
well, i hear all the times that dicks smell like squid or cheese or whatever people think stinks.... which is kinda true, but not like that.
sometimespeopleeatpoop
No, dick can smell real bad too
KjTheLightning
and what did i say? by "not like that" i meant that it doesn't smell squids or shit like that, a dick smells like a dick, that's all.
bachterman
dick cheese
JohnnieIII
I said something the one time is was really bad (smelling) turned out to be a good thing because she had a nasty infection
FlayTheGrayZones
Ewwww!
cemeterymeri
How does a woman not know?!
JohnnieIII
Well it was my Girlfriend and I just told her it didn't smell normal so she went and got checked some sort of menstrual blood infection
JohnnieIII
It didn't feel like anything to her but it sure smelled wrong...
GemsAreOutrageousTrulyTrulyTrulyOutrageous
OLD RUSTY COINS
barackaflockaflame
As a lady, I'm terrified of this being about me.
becauseurwrong
Most of the jokes and insults about private parts in society seems to be aimed at making women feel bad and insecure. To hell with 'em.
Bladedrummer
Before sexy time, make an excuse to go to the restroom and wash your cooch. I do that with my doodle. You'll be happier too!
CheshiresShadow
I mean you don't have to make an excuse.it should be expected that both partners"freshen up".otherwise they'll think you used the bathroom 1
CheshiresShadow
Before sex which is what creates paranoia about taste or smell in the first place. 2
KjTheLightning
also to be fair, it's just routine hygiene to clean up before doing it, not cleaning up before doing it is one of the main ways to get STDs.
barackaflockaflame
I always do! Baby wipes are a godsend. I'm so paranoid about it that I always prepare haha.
Bladedrummer
You're doing God's work! :D I'm super paranoid about it too so I can appreciate it. Sadly, most houses in the U.S. don't have bidets. :(
Syng420
I was paranoid about it too and then I started douching twice a week along with gentle washing every day.
LaninaGilhi
Douching can make it worse. http://www.ohjoysextoy.com/douche/
Syng420
I don't use that scented stuff, just vinegar and water. My vagina is perfectly healthy and my partners like the taste. *shrug*
becauseurwrong
Vaginas are self-cleansing unless you have an issue that needs attention. You're throwing off your ph. Washing the vulva is all you need.
Syng420
I have yet to have any issues and I've been doing this a while. Not saying you're wrong, but my vagina clearly didn't get the memo.
jakefromreddit
Milk trucks are still a thing?
revcleo
In the UK we still have milk floats, but I'm guessing that might be a truck carrying milk?
MrSkar
Why wouldn't they be? It's got to get from the factory to stores somehow.
Refmylife
We have the Internet now bruh
CorgisButtsDriveMeNuts
Replicators!
DarkUranium
Say what?!
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