Yoda1PositivityStar
99050
3076
82
Revenge
May 16, 2021 1:20 AM
Yoda1PositivityStar
99050
3076
82
rbudrick
When they wipe your ass at 85, they only did so because you scared them this much.
OhFaceYeah
Hahaha. Do you really think waking up a 12 yr old will have any effect? She probably feel back asleep within a minute
FlyingDorito
MY FRIEND DOESN’T GET IT???!?!???!!!!
klean9
YES! ONE FOR THE DADS!
iwannabetinafey
So I guess I’ll be going around yelling “I want a cracker” and “can I have a cookie” over and over in 10 years
practicallyperfect
“Mum. Mum. Mum. Mum! Mummy! Mum! MUM! Mum. Mum. Mum. Mum. Muuuuuuum! MUM!!!”
TormentedPenguin
wait till I'm too broke to afford getting put in a home and I only eat chocolate pudding... then the real revenge happens.
bronx72a
Someone said freeze your infant’s drool and keep it in the back of the freezer. On their 18th birthday, thaw it out and pour it on them.
eronth
ok.
noncommital
well played sir, well played.....
derekjohn
When they're younger, take photographs, lots of photographs . . . their former future partners will appreciate them.
NoNotHimTheOtherGuy
My ex-sister in law said the best contraception for her as a teen was babysitting. :D
jaggcomputing5
Prick.
sombercitizens
Agreed.
PieMasterOfTheRealm
When my daughter's grow up I'm getting my own back by putting yoghurt inside their PS9
monkofshadow
I to had kids that I hate them can’t wait to torture them too!!!
SacredTequila
Have fun when you’re kids let you die alone in a nursing home then??
PrincessPuffyPants
So you want to raise resentful & vindictive humans? How fun for the rest of us...
OhNoDontTouch
turns out we've not come a long way as a species.
MrShieldy
I mean many parents still think it's okay to hit their child, so... No. No we haven't.
BrockEffingSamson
"I chose to have children, and they behaved like children, and now I will blame them for that for some reason."
SacredTequila
Honestly like what kind of immature nonsense is this... not funny at all. I’m so disappointed this is why I’ll never have kids
Iblamemyparents
Turbolibros
mjdundon43360
Not the gum drop buttons. Poor Gingy!
monkofshadow
mrbellek
"I want a drink" - dad at 3AM, 4:15AM and again at 5:30AM
howcanyourunwithanarrowinyourknee
Pettiness. Excellent choice!
CosplayComet
"So when would you say your resentment for your parents started?"
IsendDickPicsIfYouAskNicely
"so you've resent your child because they were once a baby?"
RevengeOfThePotatomancer
Really makes you wonder which one is the baby here.
secretdpp
Yep, little bastard crying all the time. He won't even have permanent memories till the Mask Wars begin in earnest, what is crying about
haadyy
I used to work night shifts, so I was able to enact revenge on my 4 year old when I was going to sleep. Ask for water, ask to be tucked in,
haadyy
Ask for a hug, ask to check for monsters... Multiple times. When he already reached the door. He told me I'm not a baby and left the room
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DarkBusterBaron
See think about how this sounds I’ve called CPS for less.
bekkayya
revenge is something you do to people who arnt your prisoner, but have fun torturing a child I guess.
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MrShieldy
Thank you. If you can't handle your kids, don't fucking have children. Don't punish them for your mistakes.
GreySeasAbound
Thank you for watching out, Joke Police
benSparkleTraveler
Mate child abuse isn’t funny tho. So get fucked?
GreySeasAbound
I fully intend to, as I have more kids to make! Thanks
potatoqueen
Nah, she'll suffer the same if she has kids. I say let teenagers rest. I know I needed it at that age
mjdundon43360
Oh man, don’t be so bad your mom gives you the curse! Didn’t have kids, I knew I earned it threw karma. She threatened tho.
haadyy
I agree. But once does not in any way impede this. She'll live being woken up by a prank.
SnowballEffect
Hes teaching her how much it sucks to have a kid as a way of getting to be responsible as a teen.
potatoqueen
(Obviously 12 is not a teen, but close enough in my books)
HolyCowDoNotEat
The research backs up that claim. Teenagers need at least 9 hours of sleep on average, it’s crazy. That’s why they seem like zombies.
BrockEffingSamson
Are you sure? Boomer cartoons told me it was because of staring at their phones.
HolyCowDoNotEat
It’s a hormone issue, and it’s fascinating. Your brain is on fire for several years
Razor266
It's because they're lazy, they need to work hard etc /s
pezzle
Lol legend :)
DoYouWannaKnowMySecretIdentity
My dad woke me at 3 am on a weekend and told me I was running late for school. I was out of bed, dressed and headed for the door before he
DoYouWannaKnowMySecretIdentity
broke down laughing. I was like 10 at the time.
SociallyAwkwardCanadianMoose
Did you time yourself?
MrShieldy
Why would you do that to your kid? School is exhausting as fuck, let kids have their rest
DoYouWannaKnowMySecretIdentity
It was funny.
BryantTaylor
Your dad is evil and I love him
sureasyourebornyourenevergoingtoseenounicorn
Holding a grudge against your 4 year old for 8 years is odd. How have they not done enough other things since then to distract you?
BigTex1
It’s called dedication, the other alternative is jumper cables.
fox3hound
NZSheeps
This is probably the start of a very long list
AnythingMuchShorter
After what she does in 5 more years he'll wait 8 years then get some random girl pregnant and always drop the kid off with her to watch.
Zadwanaa
Ahh, humor.. not everyone can sense it
LicensedAdHominem
You realize it's possible to get a joke, find it funny (or not!), and then discuss its setup seriously? ⤵
LicensedAdHominem
⤷ Do you get upset at people trying to discuss satire, too? You do, don't you?
MrShieldy
Aah, good parenting... Not everyone can do it. Punishing your child for doing child things is not exactly how it should be done.
MrShieldy
Their blanket fell off, they didn't know what to do so they turned to the person they trust to know what to do. And then they make fun
MrShieldy
Of them. For "overreacting". It's "not important enough" to wake them up. Great way to slowly make sure they never come to them again.
Apeofdeath
Are you trying to raise a serial killer?
jellyfresh
MAYBE
WyrdJamie
Its a funny prank if you do it once or twice, beyond that . . . Live with what you made.
fbutt09
She will never forget that moment and will use it against her dad when he least expects it. Teenage tantrum years approaching....
sombercitizens
Oh shit ??????
BierBrechtderGrosse
certainlynotaserialkiller
that is not how you get serial killers
skrimg59
++
PenchBoy
Nah, just kids that will eventually put you in a home hahaha
gotohe11carolina
In a crooked one like on sixty minutes?
ArkenX
Not like a care home. She'll do a thorough search for single family starter homes and leave you in her 8th favorite choice and never call.
practicallyperfect
Hmm. This sounds like the amount of effort my in-laws deserve at this point
farleyminarley
I'm taking notes
Robespierre21
Truly, the only reason to have children is to mess with them as they get older and are easily embarrassed
pnersvfu
meganical
All the reasons for having children are selfish and I’m tired of pretending they’re not. Don’t deserve an award for it
KLUSTENATOR
I for one am not tired of pretending they're not. I think I'll keep at it.
nomological
sombercitizens
Nailed it.
analnipple666
ochermes28
Well, you wouldn’t be around if your parents hadn’t done the wild thing which I’m sure they often regretted.
Leavannite
Wow how bitter do you have to be to say this
DarkBusterBaron
Probably as bitter as your kid who you asked dozens of times about when they are gonna give you grandkids.
Leavannite
Have y'all considered that one might have kids just because they love kids??
gljames24
Having kids is a future investment and a way to perpetuate your genes and ideals. The view is less bitter, and more cynical.
analnipple666
We need to get over the whole "perpetuating your genes" thing, your genes aren't special. Not really cynical, just realistic.