Some Cool moments in History

Dec 21, 2014 8:46 AM

Snowchill

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The Battle at Teutoberg Forest

In 9 AD, Quintilus Varus was marching through a Germanic forest with his three legions, a few units of cavalry and some auxiliaries. Their marching line was steretched to about 15-20 kilometers. At this point the Romans were ambushed by Germans. Under heavy losses and pouring rain, the Romans managed to set up a fort for the night. The next morning, two attempts at escaping were met by heavy losses. The following night, they did a night march to escape, but were met with another trap by Ariminus, who had been raised in Rome and knew Roman tactics. The Romans made some desperate attempts to break through the ambush and failed. At that point, some Roman official commited suicide, like Varus himself, while others died fighting or surrender with their units. The destruction was complete. When Augustus, the Roman emperor, learnt of the defeat, it is said that he wandered the palace at night, banging his head on the walls, shouting: "Quintilus Varus, give me back my legions!".

The Battle at Aegos Potamoi

This battle took place during the Peloponnesian War (431 BC-404BC). This was a conflict that encompassed most of Greece, Sicily and Asia Minor. The two alliances who fought were led by the Spartans and the Athenians. In 405 BC, the Athenians and the Spartans were about to have a naval battle in Aegos Potamoi, which were in Asia Minor. Every day, they would deploy for battle, and the Athenians would wait for the Spartans to move. But the Spartans didn't. Instead, their leader, Lysander sent his fastest ship to monitor the Athenian actions. Every day, the Athenians grew more bold and would go farther from their ships after each time they deployed. After all, they were Athenians, the best sailors in the ancient world. What had they to fear? After some days, Lysander told the ship he was sending to signal the rest of the fleet when the Athenians disembarked. At that point, Lysander attacked. The Athenian demise was complete. Out of 170 ships, only 20 returned to Athens.

Thermopylae

Most of you know this one. About 7,000 Greeks held back 70,000 to 300,000 Persians.
The first day, the Greeks suposedly cut down the first wave with abrely a couple losses. Afterwards, the Persian King, Xerxes, sent 10,000 immortals. The Greeks used the tactic of feigning retreat, and then, when the enemy's line was broken from running after them, they'd turn around and slaughter them.
The second day, Xerxes assumed that the Greeks were now injured and the few were left, so he sent the infantry once again. And again, they were cut to ribbons. After a while Xerxes called the attack off. It was at that point that he was approached by a Greek called Efialtes, who knew another passage into Thermopylae, which led behind the Greek lines. (fun fact, Efialtes means Nightmare in English)
At dawn in the third day, Leonidas learnt the the Persian would have them surrounded soon. So, he order the Greeks to leave. Of the 7,000, only 300 Spartans remained, 400 Thebans and 700 Thespians stayed. Also, the Helots, the Spartan slaves, stayed behind, because they were slaves, they had no other option.
When the Persians attacked, the Greeks actually sallied out, in order to kill as many as they could. They fought with spears until they broke, and then carried on with swords. It was then that Leonidas died. Afterwards, the Greeks retreated to a hill to make a last stand. It was then that the Thebans surrendered. (this caused them much dishonor and disdain later, altough they were reedemed) The remaining Greeks were said to have fought with swords teeth and nails, until they all died.
Today, on the hill were they died, stands and epitaph by Simonides:
Ὦ ξεῖν', ἀγγέλλειν Λακεδαιμονίοις ὅτι τῇδε
κείμεθα, τοῖς κείνων ῥήμασι πειθόμενοι.

Ō ksein', angellein Lakedaimoniois hoti tēide
keimetha, tois keinōn rhēmasi peithomenoi.

Go tell the Spartans, thou who passest by,
That here, obedient to their laws, we lie

Mikatagahara

This battle was fought during the Sengoku Jidai in Japan. Ieyasu Tokugawa faced Takeda Shingen. Shingen, using his cavalry, the best in Japan, demolished the Tokugawa forces. Tokugawa retreated to Hamamatsu castle, with only five men following him. At this point, most samurai would commit seppuku (suicide). But not Tokugawa.
He ordered the castle gates to remain open, while he sent one of his men to beat a war drum outside them. When the Takeda vanguard approached them, they thought it was a trap, so they waited outside and made camp for the night. During the night, Tokugawa sent a group of ninjas led by Hanzo Hattori (otherwise known as the most badass ninja of the era) These ninjas proceed to do some damage to the Takeda army. The following day, Shingen, woried that reinforcements would soon arrive, and uncertain of the strength of the Tokugawa army, retreats back to his home province of Kai.

Megalopolis and Agis the Third

Agis was a Spartan king during the times of Alexander. He revolted against him and besieged Megalopolis, a city in the Peloponesse. The city managed to hold out until a Macedonian general, Antipater, came to its aid. In the battle that ensued, Agis lost, despite doing great damage to Anipater. during the retreat, when it became apparent that the Macedonians would catch up to the Spartans, Agis, who had taken many wounds across his face, chest and legs, ordered his men, who were carrying him, to let him down and continue retreating. Agis, unable to even stand, stood on his knees and waited for the Macedonians. He managed to kill quite a few of them and slow them down, until a javelin went through him, You would think his massive balls of steel would have stopped it, but what can you do.

I hope you enjoyed guys! I tried to keep it short! If you want me to do a post with anything else historical, tell me in the comments! Also, here are some Spartan quotes:

-'But we have never driven you from the Eurotas!'
When an Athenian claimed that 'We have often driven you from the Cephisus'. Antalcidas a Spartan negotiator's reply.
'Cephisus' is a river that flows through the Athenian plain, and 'Eurotas' is a river that flows near Sparta. The Athenians nor any other enemy had ever reached that far in Lacedamonia towards Sparta.

-'As far as this can reach.'
When asked 'how far Sparta's boundaries stretched?', King Agesilaus' repied brandishing his spear.

-'These are Sparta's walls.'
When asked why Sparta lacked fortifications, King Agesilaus' pointed to his men.

-'What splendid women's quarters."
When being drawn attention to the solid city-walls with its exceptionally strong construction, King Agesilaus remarked

-A Spartan warrior was said to have painted a life size fly upon his aspis (shield). Asked why the enemy would be scared of a fly he said: Because when I smash it into their face it would appear a giant.

You could do a battle from the Reconquista, The Charge of the light Brigade from the Crimean War, The Boer Wars, the Boxer Rebellion.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Really loved the post man but could you do me a favor and cite your sources? In case some of us want to look into stuff on our own?

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Massive balls of steek

11 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

TIL steek

11 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 2

If anyone is interested in stuff like this, Extra Credit does a great series called "Extra History" that covers this type of stuff.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I'm loving the Japanese series. Really cool stuff going on

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The Greeks would probably still rule the Mediterranean if they didn't squabble amongst themselves so much.

11 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 0

Very true.

11 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

As a Greek, we were ALWAYS like that. We still are. Take a look at what's going on in the country at the moment. We are utter jerks!

11 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

+1 for the motherfucking greek epitaph. There's a beautiful latin translation of that by Cicero, too.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Takeda**

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

fixed

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

You should include the Battle of Adrianople. The Romans were supposedly packed so deep that they couldn't even raise their swords.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Oh yes, and Cannae.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Don't forget Caesar Crossing the Rhine. "Rome can go anywhere"... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caesar%27s_Rhine_bridges

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Thx, did not know that

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

After invading Greece, Philip II of Macedon sent a message to Sparta: "If I invade Laconia you will be destroyed, never to rise again.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

" The Spartans replied: "If" (αἴκα). "If" (αἴκα). Neither Philip II nor his son Alexander the Great attempted to capture the city.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Thing is, they could have done it, Sparta was pretty bad then, they just respected them and mocked them when they invaded Persia.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Basically the Greeks and Romans had some of the best fights.

11 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

Romans had a very well structured military and for a while had superior structure, training and equipment but overtime never update them.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

True.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

If you are into Greek war history read "The Virtues of War" and the "Gates of Fire" by Steven Pressfield.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

My favourite quote from Sparta was "If".

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

its not taked.. Its Takeda Shingen. Loved the stories!

11 years ago | Likes 62 Dislikes 0

Was looking for this response. Thank you

11 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

What about Tokugaawa and cavlry.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Fixed it!

11 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

History is often a lot cooler than modern movies would have us believe... also a lot more dangerous, unforgiving, and poorly lit.

11 years ago | Likes 876 Dislikes 2

This is very long to read, but the pictures are pretty

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 13

Also no running water or ceramic thrones.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

In my experience, life has a pretty low production value.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

So Game of Thrones in a nutshell.

11 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

Except for the poorly lit part.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

You forget "dirty" and "unhygienic"

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Don't forget the fucktons of backstabbing and betrayal.

11 years ago | Likes 226 Dislikes 0

And the diseases

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I'm curious if the reason Efialtes means nightmare is because of him. I doubt his parents were like "We're going to name you nightmare"

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

It probably is, because it was a common name in Ancient Greece, that was rarely used again afterwards

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Sacking of Constantinople in 1204 surely was one fop the biggest backstabbings in history of Europe, and also one of the saddest moments...

11 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Man, I'm Greek, this shit makes me so bloody sad. It's essentialy Byzanium's end.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Yeah... a 200-year long prelude to 1453 pretty much...

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Honestly, for me Byzantium ends in 1204. After that, most emperors sucked and the Empire was tiny.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I'm just a Roman fanboy and I'm pissed at Enrico Dandolo. Can't imagine how a Greek would feel.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Very, very sad. Although Dandolo was kinda badass, and the Byzantines had it coming, since the whole Emperor dynasty (Aggeloi) sucked balls.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

And a lot more stinky!

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Arminius (Hermann) and the forest in question: But I don't think he originally was 175ft

11 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

Herman the German. I live near the Teutoburger Forest.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Me too. In Bielefeld.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You never know man

11 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

I was there as a kid once and there was a dad with his son on his shoulders saying "that's Hermann. He beat up romans back in the day like

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Asterix and Obelix"

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

For more awesome history check these guys out! https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLhyKYa0YJ_5Aq7g4bil7bnGi0A8gTsawu

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I've been looking for someone to mention Extra History here

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I love these guys. Also, check out Crash course, although it's not as accurate

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Maybe credit them for the description of Tokugawa and Hanzo. They use the same wording in their recent episode.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

If anyone is interested, there is a great movie about the battle of teutoberg forest called "Eagle" I would definitely recommend it

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

The Tokugawa one sounds awfully like something Zhuge Liang did....

11 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

It's a whole tactic, I think, been done a number of times

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

You guys talking about the dude who just sat at the gates and drank tea?

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

yeah

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

The thing with Quintilus Varus is the benchmark test for Total War: Rome 2 (Emperor Edition, not the shitty original one with all the bugs).

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I am leardning :')

11 years ago | Likes 29 Dislikes 3

Hi super nintendo Chalmers!

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

"Me fail English? That's unpossible."

11 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

yayyy

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The Battle of Teutoberg was later avenged heavily by Germanicus!

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Man, is there any part in history where Germans weren't fucking bad ass? Hmmm...

11 years ago | Likes 30 Dislikes 5

Well, the HRE was a bloody mess after a point... But other than that...

11 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

I'd say present day Germany.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 2

Well they didn't do so hot in WWI...

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

(1/2) The Romans march two legions down the Rhine when they encountered Germans. They asked them if they wanted to be a colony of Rome.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

(2/2) The Germans put up their hands, and said sure. That place is now known as Cologne.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Well, after teoutoberg, more Romans marched up there and pushed Germany's shit in so hard that general is now known only as "Germanicus".

11 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 1

"Pax Romana" is Latin for "Don't Fuck With Us".

11 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Still couldn't hold the bits of Germania they did take though. Retreated right back across the Rhine when they were done.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

They were kind of demolished later by the Romans as revenge for the Teutoberg disaster!

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I don't know if you heard of the Third Reich. That was a pretty important thing that happened.

11 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 9

As a German: Thank you for calling us badass. +1 for you

11 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 3

Hey, you Germans are pretty baller.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Not sure why this got downvoted. Germans are badass...

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Well, thank you, too.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

TIL Hattori Hanzo actually existed

11 years ago | Likes 29 Dislikes 1

and rather than a swordmaker he was a ninja!

11 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Fuck yeah he did.

11 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

Yea but hes considered a traitor of ninjas

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

There were more than on Hattori Hanzo. The one in this story was Hattori Hanzo the first, nicknamed "The Devil Hanzo".

11 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Im not sure if you watch it, but Gintama has a guy called Hattori Zeno based off of him.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

He suffers from hemorrhoids

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

But Sarutobi Sasuke did not. Nor did the rest of the sanada ten braves.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Damn, i remember playing Total War Shogun with only my general and a couple archers left, against 5 groups of samurai, i died honorably.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

You have made your kin proud

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Japan uses the names of it's historical figures quite often in it's media.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I too like to fight naked

11 years ago | Likes 33 Dislikes 0

It's pretty bad-ass.. Pretty bare-ass too.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Imagine the enemies fear when you get a chub on

11 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

Imagine your fear when they respond by unsheathing their sword (actual sword; not penis).

11 years ago | Likes 0 Dislikes 0

11 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 0

Classic

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

"OH MY GOD HE"S GONE FULL CHUB"

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

"GET OUT OF RANGE" -Xerxes, maybe

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

No battle of Salamis? And another Laconic quote: "If I invade Laconia you will be destroyed, never to rise again." -"If."

11 years ago | Likes 201 Dislikes 2

Probably one of the best quotes in history. I sadly can only +1 this once

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I wanted to include Salamis, but I didn't want this to be too long, also I didn't want it to have just Greek stuff. Maybe in part 2

11 years ago | Likes 52 Dislikes 0

If you're doing a Part 2, I'd recommend the Battle of Alesia. Caesar was one clever cookie.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Please put in more about the Romans!

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You should include battles during the Crusades also

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

But Greek stuff is best stuff. Also, Battle of Sabis. I translated part of it in high school, and we had this awesome teacher who made [1]

11 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

the best pictures and explanations on what went down, what Caesar did, what the Belgicae did...

11 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

As a Greek, Greek stuff IS best stuff :) I'll probably include both of these in part 2 if I make another

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I'm also partial to the Persian wars, because I've translated parts of the Anabasis.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

All this over a delicious deli sandwich? Perfect.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

The Spartans designed their entire culture around speaking softly and carrying a big stick. Also slaves.

11 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

I love history. Very rarely do I find parts of it uncool.

11 years ago | Likes 60 Dislikes 3

The boring, uncool things are left to the professionals.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

You. I like you.

11 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 1

:)

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

Indeed, I especially find the prelude to WW1 the most interesting months in history. Surely shaped the world we live in.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Well, and all the events before that shaped the prelude to WW1.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Well naturally, but I meant the diplomatic exchange and the tries to avoid a large war to the very end. No one wanted a war THAT big.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

There is a youtube channel called "The Great War", check it out, you will like it.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Hmm who do you think were the better sailors? Vikings or the greek?

11 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 3

Greeks could only sail if the wind was at their back. They also could only do coastal voyages, while Vikings sailed the open waters.

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Additionally, the Vikings could raid up river, their boats were shallow enough. And they could carry their boat if needed to the next river.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Different ships and tactics. Hard to compare, but would say Greeks.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Which one reached both the New World and the Mediterranean? Those guys must have been bored as hell up there in the somber North.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Greeks I think

11 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

On Trade Greeks were better but on combat Vikings were better. Greeks had the "Greek Fire" but Vikings had better ships overall.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Vikings, Greeks didn't do open water so well mostly stuck to coastal routes

11 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 1

thanks OP !! love history! do more about HANZO and his baddassery

11 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

I didn't realize Kill Bill was referencing a real guy. I should have, but I didn't.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

If you like the Japanese warring history, take a look at Extra History on YouTube. Great series and is really entertaining

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

thanks will do !

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

My Latin teacher, who was at the battle of the Teutoburgiensis Saltus, had us take down the following note on it: (1/several)

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

"The battle was fought on a very wet day in marshland. Those who survived were placed in baskets and burned alive. The worst of this (2/?)

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

... was the loss... of the Roooman eeeaagles." (i.e. the aquila standards.) It always struck me as particularly heartless that the standards

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

mattered more to him than the men, especially seeing how he was Augustus himself. (4/4) The story loses out a bit without the hand (1/2???)

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

movements and vocal impression. (5/5)

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0