SmoochieCuddlkins
70975
2270
62
Aug 18, 2016 4:21 PM
SmoochieCuddlkins
70975
2270
62
MyLastUsernameWasSoLongIKeptForgettingIt
May your marinara never stick to your pasta
StonedLikeACheatingMuslimWoman
May you stand up from your computer while forgetting that your headphones are in
FluffyPuddles
AreaMan24
May your streaming services all require you to input your password again on the same day.
LastMan1
May every post you come across contain a badly photoshopped photo of Micheal Cera
LaPetiteChou
May you always type your password incorrectly the first time.
SmoochieCuddlkins
I have created monsters!
JosephPretzel
May you always walk on a wet patch while wearing socks.
JosephPretzel
May your plate have a slight amount of sauce on the underside before you place it on your lap.
StonedLikeACheatingMuslimWoman
May you always have a mismatched number of hot dogs and buns.
wolfshades
If my mother came and talked with me, my least concern would be that she left the door ajar. She ded.
TheDreaded1
May you feel slightly unsure if you set the alarm clock, but only after you've finally snuggled into your comfy spot in bed.
ZZhillTopper
Never trust a fart
MrFistyFartFingers
I still read this in Christopher walken voice
RagedDingo
Jokes on you, all my Facebook notifications are already game invited. I'm so lonely ;-;
twistydoerofthings
May you sweat enough for a thousand camels.
YoloSwagginsAndTheKnightsOfTheRoundTable
That ad shit happens to me all the time. I'm convinced they do it on purpose so you click the ad
negzero
First World Curses!
BelfryBats
Another one is may you always feel like you have a popcorn kernel stuck in your teeth.
SmoochieCuddlkins
So true!
WhyYesMyNameIsJess
May you put on a fresh pair of socks only to step in a small puddle of water from the shower you just came out of
SuperSaiyanSasquatch
I've been in the first situation, I wouldn't wish that on anyone...
StonedLikeACheatingMuslimWoman
May your shower controls always make your shower either too hot or too cold, never reaching a comfortable water temperature.
firepower412
May your chocolate chips always be raisins...that's messed up man, I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy...that's right, not even you Dave.
krapmyself
Number 2 was my mom during highschool. Always. Number 3 is imgur on moblie. Always.
hater2644
May it always take you at least 3 tries to plug in your usb
Squirrelprophecies
Ghaaaa!
Sweeetbabyjames
As a Mexican: may your tostada crumble at the first bite.
MadVillainousDave
May your headphones cable get caught on every door handle you pass by.
beurgueur
Geeky looking BlueTooth headphones
TygrF
*belt loop
Swinette
May every story you hear end in tree fiddy and the Loch Ness Monster
SmellyPotatoMan
NeverDunNuffin
TheFrenchestFry
I had to check....
lurkernotaposter24
Don't you put that evil on me Ricky Bobby!!!
ScrubsPosts
May you browse for hours to only find that your wifi is off.
LastMan1
Don't you put that evil on me Ricky Bobby!!
creq2
Just turned mine on, thanks!
WhatwouldJesusdeadlift
I had to check after I read this...
AwesomeTeddybear
Well thank God I have 20 gig a month! Never got to 0 yet
maxcostco
Just Download hearthstone
enneque
Omg thisss #ripdata
Shaveyourdingleberries
Thanks for making me look
iLikeBeerandSquirrels
Unlimited data plan, yo
Kalooki
I literally said "oooh no" out loud