IPointThings
192850
3921
44
Pro survival tip
Nov 21, 2017 8:15 AM
IPointThings
192850
3921
44
MightyIink
I guess I'll just work late tonight...
bestdamnusername
What the hell good is going with a coworker going to do? Do they think two people are going to whup that polar bears ass?
phowaJapeFlyer
Is this so the fuzzy looking murder machine can have double the snacks to hopefully fill up for the rest of the people in the building?
dogmatix
And if they're faster than you, remember to trip them.
AwkwardKeming
WATCH OUT! He's in the next post over!
meatstain
I work in Prudhoe Bay where this is and most of the people that work with me there are "slower". It's all the camp food and Fox news...
InigoMontoyas1stsword
Just play some dance music, and....https://78.media.tumblr.com/5978786db348d7225fa1b339c2c9a7f6/tumblr_olu1095GfS1udh5n8o1_400.gif
Lunar2469
I would go with a shotgun rather then another person. What are two people gonna do to a bear other then run away and see who's slower?
En3rgised
Note: bring snacks
MarcUK
Aren't bears afraid of loud noises? Take an air horn.
Shut1td0wn
Isuckatusernames2
Thanks I'll go with that one annoying fucker. Push them in the way if shit gets real.
Hobbs76
I feel like this is on the North Slope??
meatstain
You are correct.
Drakhma
i dont have to outrun the bear, i just need to outrun you
brasky456
If commercial advertising has taught me anything, it's to walk out there right now with 2 bottles of Coke and make a best friend.
Shut1td0wn
cyberpunxie
Coke for polar bears, Pepsi for cops, got it.
[deleted]
[deleted]
STGxDante
Moose piss
AStrayPube
Tin of pepsi should do the trick.
damyen
You trying to piss a polar bear off?
JoeTheMadScientist
Prelltime
What BEAR is it!?
notblubber
Florida?
jasonJokeJumper
Dinner with a friend
hummerandachickenfeed
Polar bears are expert predators. They will scope out an area and learn peoples schedules. If you see the polar bear you're already dead.
fluhatinrapper
I thought I felt funny after leaving the zoo. Turns out, I've been dead all this time and not just on the inside!
ImCommanderShepardandthisismyfavoritepostonthefrontpage
Kupcup
This is one of my favorite videos ever
HashtagNoregrets
Is this related to the US Antarctica research program post already?
aw02s1
"Slower"
BewilderedBeaver
Australia? Probably Australia.
doctorbees
I can't tell if you're joking or not.
BewilderedBeaver
doctorbees
Haha that's actually why I asked. I stopped for a sec like, "You know, he could be joking." But I wasn't sure and now here we are.
BewilderedBeaver
My second choice would have been to blame Florida as that's the only other place where weird wildlife stuff like that happens. :D
epedemix
ThailandExpress
If you hurry and leave now, Bob has them distracted
lkand77110
What is that?
dublincelltech
What was that
prismbear
seal
d0o0o0d
Polar bears and what's left of Bob.
InnerUniverse
You don't have to outrun the bear, you just have to outrun your friend/coworker.
MaxReboBand
Queenofspiders
Awe that's adorable
TZO2k15
Galumph-a-dumph-Galumph-a-dumph-Galumph-a-dumph-Galumph-a-dumph-Galumph-a-dumph!
KingOfTheAnarchists
Run awayyy!
EmeraldFont
It's comin' right for us!
ALivingMemeReference
LasseTheLaser
me https://geeksout.org/sites/default/files/blog-images/pepper%20potts_no.gif
originalBabewiththePower
Exact conversation between me and my husband except I'm asking for one.
LasseTheLaser
same
LasseTheLaser
well its between me and my girlfriend and im the one who wants the polar bear
originalBabewiththePower
I'm certain we end up with the ones who keep us alive and away from dumb ideas like hugging a tiger in the wild.
IGetItFrenchClass
Vicious I tell you!
KingOfTheAnarchists
Run awayyy!
PutInaThumbnPulledOutAPlum
Flops on carpet and snuggles
providedlava
D:
LottetheLlama
Holy crap, that can't be real...
avastmehearty
A friend goes to Svalbard for fieldwork every year or so, has to qualify with a 30-06 rifle each time
Ootandabootehh
Friend grew up in Nunavut. They had Halloween in the school gym because it's unsafe for the kids to walk around at night because of this!
IAmLobstronomous
Deadhorse???? Deadhorse...
inferno34
Oh you city folk
MistaGavin
This is referring to the polar bear spotted near the man camp in Prudhoe Bay, AK this evening.
beian
I was wondering if this was Prudhoe! When I was at Toolik I heard...stories.
ThatHappensToMeSometimes
At least they’re keeping things interesting on the Slope!
DarthLabradoodle
Prudhoe Bay? Jeez, making your fucking mind, Alaska. Is she a prude, a hoe, or a bae?
Orktapus
Of course its for the man camp, the bear camp hardly needs signs that bears are near.
BojanglesTheFlyingCar
It's very real in Alaska,Northern territories, and northern Europe
Squossifrage
There are no polar bears in Northern Europe (but there are polar bears on some arctic dependencies of Northern European countries)
BojanglesTheFlyingCar
Yeah I should have been way more specific
[deleted]
[deleted]
mastikator
Siberia
Moonprayer
Russia is the only part of mainland europe that has Polar Bears, Svalbard in Norway has them too, Greenland is North America.
Driedchicken
Norway
MacGyverofAnxiety
I think Greenland is part of North America
DavidBrooker
Depends if you study human geography or physical geography.
Pigswithstripes
Greenland was part of Denmark for the longest time. But it still counts as part of Northern America
Edowardo23
Svalbard has some polar bears too
jojoba1
I'm going there in two days! If you don't hear from me by Monday, send a search party
metalfoto
Yes Svalbard, idk if it counts as Europe :D
PenicilliumCamemberti
"Some". Aren't the people there advised to carry fire arms because there are so many bears?
TheManOuttaNorway
Yup
Efreeti
Not advised. You're not ALLOWED to travel outside the settlements without one of you being trained in the use of and carrying a rifle.
oldarchive
Just wondering, where are you from?
LottetheLlama
Me? New Zealand...
CanadaEhBuddy
If ya live in Churchill Manitoba it is! Illegal to lock car doors so people have a way to escape them
imgonnawreckitagain
I am going to need a source for that my friend.
ACanadianPerson
I can confirm it. Check my username, all the proof you need.
imgonnawreckitagain
heh. well done
[deleted]
[deleted]
imgonnawreckitagain
Many locals even leave their cars unlocked in case someone needs to make a quick escape from the polar bears in the area.[18] from wikipedia
themostcomfortablehat
I live in Winnipeg in Manitoba and I worked on a train that goes to Churchill, can confirm
PaddyOLatern
I'm from Winnipeg too :)
imgonnawreckitagain
It's the whole "its against the law" thing I dont believe. A small town that helps each other out i can believe, but against the law? i dont
themostcomfortablehat
Fair enough, I can only say that they do it. I'm not sure if it's law enforced
imgonnawreckitagain
Many locals even leave their cars unlocked in case someone needs to make a quick escape from the polar bears in the area.[18] Wikipedia
LottetheLlama
Mind. Blown.
Getty13
I've been there and it's true.The bears can come right up to doors. They do a really good job of scaring them away from the town. Cool place
RawrImABear
I feel like a car door would not stop a polar bear...
VolvoSupportTeam
The best it can really do is flip the car, and a bear wouldn't bother with that shit.
CirB
Remember, a .22 gun is plenty. Just kneecap your companion so the bear'll stop to maul them while you walk away.
LordAsshurt
BUT GUNS ARE BAD
doctorbees
To be fair, you don't even kneed a gun to kneecap your friend.
TheGriffin
poorwhitetrash
Dat contraction, yo...
CloudberryMoose
Not that uncommon, surely?
Thefrenchnewt
But what if both people kneecap each other ?
definitelynotawolf
Lunch AND dinner
CassiusPolybius
Gun owning asshole's dillemma.
Rkfinecake
Well then it becomes a reality show.
CirB
The bear will think it's his/her birthday party.
MrDerpingtons
Sounds good, Shane!
dmbelafan
https://media.giphy.com/media/3oz8xESFFBxNA7vloA/giphy.gif
TheCrusher78
The term is now called "Shaning", them. You know like what Shane did on the Walking dead :)
SuburbanMeerkat
ThatoneQuebecguywhothinkshesCanadian
I think my 0.22cm gun will work just fine against a polar bear, hopefully this one isn't on cocaine.
internetpointsareimportanttome
Boy I was about to teach you a lesson on firearms and you taught me a lesson on life
zimirken
Technically the only reason the fbi doesnt reccommend .22 for self defense is higher fail to fire risk of rimfire cartridges.
KingORedLions
To be fair, we're talking about a polar bear. If it's anything less than a .50, you're just making it irritable.
causality
Uh, no. FBI recommended minimum penetration is 12 inches in gel. .22lr doesn't meet that requirement.
saltandsunshine
Also it has virtually no stopping power on anything bigger than a cat.
BklynPunisher
Just use the rifle as a club.
GamesYouShouldPlay
I work at a hospital. Ive seen all sorts of bullet wounds but a .22 does more than youd expect. No stopping power but if it bounces around i
GamesYouShouldPlay
n your ribcage, youre in for a bad time
MalNebiros
Will the bear stop moving before it reaches you? A draw isn't enough in this situation.
YeahDaddySpinOnMyAss
Always kill your friends, isn’t that how it works?
CirB
Nah, you don't kill them. You just *nudge* them a bit. The bear'll kill 'em.
superseriouscomments
A man with friends who are not dead ... a dead giveaway that that person has no clue about life.
JHawke
More than his dead friends though!
therearenomoreusernamesleft
Use bear/pepper spray. This way your friend will provide a bit of fight for the bear, allowing you more time to escape.
muramaza
bear spray sounds like it attracts bears
CirB
to me it sounds like the ending of the encounter...
therearenomoreusernamesleft
Then what about fly spray?