IOnceCalledMyTeacherMomByMistake
101423
2274
75
Been playing for 12+ years
Learned playing Advanced with my dad, uncles and their friends.
My currant 5e rogue, Sphinx
I have a GSD. He is cute.
I can relate
I have one of these on my keys...
All hail a nat 20
Been here a few times....
I play with a Kenku bard. Lol
So a rogue walks into a bar
No one noticed.
I like to think he's a gnome with a violin.
Happy little ogre
I have so many dice
My fiance is a DM. There are perks as a player. ;)
Slap my ass and call me pretty.
My uncle would give extra xp for being on time to game. He did not take bribes.
Sphinx has a -2 charisma. She's a bitch.
I also play a cleric in another game
I've played with a Crimes Johnson. Don't be a Crimes Johnson.
Been here too.
I enjoy stabbing others.
Can attest. This is what it's like with my uncles vs with my friends.
Always.
Roll high friends.
Another birb reference to the bard.
Accurate
Enjoy the game.
Fat Lucy cat tax
Stark dog Tax
Front page edit:
Thanks a bunch folks! It's my first time here. I love all the love.
Send an "I love you" text to your mom.
tibris
Crimes Johnson is the WORST!
RooktheBagginz
Stark looks like a cartoon character, I love stark...Also great post +1
RosiePosiePuddinNPie
My favorite character ever was a CN half elf bard. She fell off the fence, went full CE, and then killed/enslaved all elves. Good times.
Addonays
Lol at the end the dog is like, "hi, this is dog"
JPDG
ltjektanoporkins
NinjablazerZero
#21 It's called personal space. What are we, savages?
NiceLegsDaisyDukesMakesAMAAANOUTOFYOOOUUUU
I roll to seduce the Mindflayer!
TheVakarian
#3 Bothers me every time I see it, Borzoi's were right there to use!!
Hayashima
People in D&D are obviously Finns - that 5×5ft. is called personal space!
DiabloGrandeArts
So I haven't played DnD in over ten years, and I own no dice, but every time I see a set, I want to buy it.
shorr
I've only played on roll20, play only rarely and I want to buy certain sets.
Zixtank
#26 pretty sure Loki is an arcane trickster rogue
Sigh101
Just started dming Lost mine phandalar. One guy died 3 times before coming to first town, on the intro quest
BurrhusBacchus
Predacane35
#26 Except Starlord is the bard, not Antman.
ParanoidCarrot
best doggo and catto
oPhoenixo
Feel like I'm missing part of the joke on #6 - would the dice mean something else?
richtus
Excellent quality and zoom on that Fuck crochet.
superstiehl
I love DND memes, but what I don't love is that Imgur keeps moving where I am looking on the screen...why????
FELTMARKERS
Stark looks like The Punisher!!!
SilviaBond
I just ended a campaign as a half elf named Karen and my catchphrase was “Can I speak to the manager?”
tofudisan
Glorious
ScarecrowSticks
penguinscience101
That's why I like dark souls mimics, they'll either eat you or bycicle kick you across a room
lfrdwork
The first time that big wind up kick punted me I was a bit shocked!
AnonOmis1000
I saw someone 3d printed a mini based off this
ScarecrowSticks
ReverendAurora
Do not meddle in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
SorayaProtera
That was literally the third-to-last image in the gallery...
tofudisan
You didn't read very close
ReverendAurora
Thank you.
SorayaProtera
... wait heck. OK, I readily admit, I saw the start of the image, assumed it was that classic, and let my eyes skip past. I apologize!
ReverendAurora
Re-read the meme, and then re-read mine. Yay learning reading comprehension, if you can spot the difference I'll even give you a gold star.
Morgc
That picture of the characters in the bar is the stormcrow alehouse in Vancouver, pretty cool place.
Morgc
https://s3-media4.fl.yelpcdn.com/bphoto/ttSOSYfzNTdi4MYjrg8W1w/348s.jpg
Nilliks6
Clickbait: Druids are better healers than Clerics.
Sirhc978
I do so much "totally accidental" damage to my party with moonbeam and fireball that I need to be a really good healer.
Ravenlord4711
Played a Goliath paladin in full plate and got a nat 20 on a stealth roll, nothing like a 8 foot plat armored man weilding a maul invisible.
metroidmayhem
Goliath paladin buddies :D and yea it's funny when I roll 20 on stealth and my rogue rolls a 6. Just stomping with my greatsword and armor
gaidinbdj
A natural 20 isn't an automatic success. It's just the best possible outcome.
bnm12
Nat 20 on skill checks just counts as a 20 it doesn't mean instant success otherwise the "take 20" rule would allow you to do anything
errdil
It used to be back in 3rd. Obviously a success needs to be physically possible, so no seducing doors. And take 20 isn't a nat 20.
Ravenlord4711
Well obviously it has to be possible. But the dm will just say no you can't do that if it's not...
OrnamentalTurtle
So your GM plays a natural 20 is auto success?
Ravenlord4711
Yes. I've never actually met one that didn't
OrnamentalTurtle
/Shrug I don't.
Zyrixion
Conversely, reminds me of the time our dragonborn paladin in full plate mail rolled a 1 on stealth, and for one instant everything 1/
Zyrixion
everywhere knew where he was.
ReverendAurora
*Me chewing on a turnip in fantasy land* "S'funny, I could sworn I had a fleeting vision of a paladin saying 'FUCK!' really loudly."
tonsofturtles
I'm playing an aetherborn goolock, he's releasing the eldrazi.
thecrystalqueen
I'm planning a minotaur rakdos Shakespearen bard for our new campaign, pretty excited.
SabonVous
got a redneck halfling ranger who only uses slings, i call him yeetus.
thecrystalqueen
brilliant, i love it
tonsofturtles
That sounds ridiculous and lovely, lops off someone in the audiences head and use it for the to be or not to be scene.
thecrystalqueen
Yes, and all the Shakespearen insults for vicious mockery, cutting words ect.
ReverendAurora
I love my super-intelligent Gnome with the wisdom of a goldfish. "We should do this." Druid with super-wisdom facepalms
ReverendAurora
and calmly explains the three million two hundred and sixty one ways in which Valentine's plan will most definitely not work.
RuthlessRuben
My druid is the opposite. And thanks to how 5th works, he's a brilliant healer, wise beyond measure, but can't tell an oak from a dandelion.
ReverendAurora
We'd get along famously then. Although my Gnome is from Pathfinder.
RuthlessRuben
I play in a Pathfinder group too, though my Psion there is a bit like your gnome.
ReverendAurora
I made a mangonel last session, it fired once, exploded but it's projectile killed three bandits. I was happy, if splintered.
RuthlessRuben
Yes, now I am also convinced we'd get along well.
tofudisan
Just started a new campaign with coworkers. Gnome wizard. I am literally a newb learning as I go.
NerdsForDays
Good for you.
zeratruel
Gnome wizard is always fun! Good choice
PhailRaptor
Looking through the playable races, I wouldn't choose anything other than Gnome or Yuan-Ti for a Wizard. Good choice.
drewgolas
Yuan-ti is a broken race
SamuraiChemist
Check out Matt Colvilles series "Runing the game" on youtube. Great information for DM's and players alike!
Chebacca
.
raosion
TimmyDans
Get a saddle for the strongest party member and ride him in to battle like the faithfulStead he is never call him their name only "Buttercup
tofudisan
Love this! I actually was thinking of riding on the shoulders of our tank lol
TimmyDans
Yeah it's perfect you get close and you can duck behind him
OobedoobScoobyDoobyBenubi
#1 tip. always use your size to your advantage. i'm playing a wild magic sorcerer gnome, and it's always great when npcs/enemies (1)
OobedoobScoobyDoobyBenubi
(2/?) underestimate me. i'm tiny but i pack a wallop. plus you can pretend to be a child to get away with a lot of shit. oh ya and if you
OobedoobScoobyDoobyBenubi
(3/3) cast the reduce spell on yourself, you can lift yourself with mage hand for all kinds of shenanigans.
ReverendAurora
If there's a dwarf in the party, try and get it to subscribe to the ancient pact. Dwarfs fetch, gnomes do. Wall of comments incoming.
ReverendAurora
So my gnome inventor was bored in a meeting, he starts using a few lenses to build himself a telescope, he realises he needs a bigger
ReverendAurora
lense for the end piece, luckily there's a hick who's giving testimony to the village castle and he's got these big thick
ReverendAurora
NHS lenses in his glasses. I say to Thundoon the Dwarf. "I need that man's glasses" Dwarf does not ask why,
ReverendAurora
he just swipes them off the dude's face and gives them to me. I finish making my telescope. All is good.