Carny Work Stories

Just finished my last day at my summer job, scamming people out of their money at an amusement park. It was probably the most fun job I've ever had and work stories posts are my favorite kinds, so I figured I'd share some of my own stories with you glorious bastards.

FP Edit: Holy shit guys this is my first time on FP and I reached Trusted so here's part 2 for you guys!! http://imgur.com/gallery/LEuEJ

This was my first day, I thought the customers I'd read about in work stories posts were exaggerations. Nope. She shook a five dollar bill at me, then got mad when I didn't start instantly making change for her. Sorry.

T

For every little boy who wanted a blue or a green prize, there were at least 2 that wanted a pink prize. 9/10 parents would laugh and say "no, you don't want that one, get the blue one instead!" Then they'd look at me like "oh, kids these days." Like??? Nobody's gonna see your 2 year old kid with a pink dolphin and go "oh, his parents raised him wrong."

My second to last shift, I'd pretty much had enough with these kids of parents. I held out four little stuffed animal sharks to a boy, probably 2yo, and he grabbed the pink one. The mom said "no silly, you don't want that one, get a blue or a green one instead!" Kid clearly wanted pink, so mom pulled the toy out of his reach and handed it back to me to "hide." Normally I'd just customer service smile my way through the exchange, but yanking toys out of my hands to hide from your kid? Nuh-uh. I pulled away the other three sharks and held the pink one out individually; you've never seen a happier kid as that little boy holding his pink shark. A parent that would sacrifice the pure joy on his face for a "boy prize" is the worst kind of parent.

We're not just talking because we like to hear our own voices. If we tell you something, it's probably important enough that not listening to us would not count your "win" - bank shots, leaning on the counter, stuff like that.

A girl was at Whiffle Toss, where you roll a whiffle ball across a board filled with holes and get it in the colored circles to get a prize. Only one Jumbo hole. She stopped halfway through throwing to wait for her uncle to throw for her, but he was at another game. I had to run a game for another guy while she was waiting, so I specifically told her to not throw until the other game had finished. Guy is halfway through throwing, girl says fuck it, not gonna wait for my uncle anymore, starts throwing again before I can tell her to stop.
Would you fucking know it, one of them gets a jumbo. I'm jumping around, excited, ringing the cowbell (jumbo prize winners are pretty rare), when I realize I don't know which one of them threw it. Guy's looking happy with himself, girl's shaking her head telling her family "nah it wasn't me." Give the dude his jumbo prize (a 5ft tall ninja turtle), go on my merry way, but I ran that game over in my head the rest of the night, and I know for a fact it was the girl that threw the jumbo win.

I felt guilty for about 2 seconds, but I told her not to throw. Her loss.

My favorite customer ever. Slow day, girl a bit younger than me comes up, asks if I can chat for a bit, I say sure why not. The way she's jumping around in conversation and how her dad is hovering a few feet away makes me think she's probably on the spectrum.

Girl: "So what grade are you in?"
Me: "Oh, I just graduated, I'm headed to college in the fall."
Girl: "Have you ever been to Iowa?"

I was about to answer when her dad jumped in and said "She just told you she was going to college, what would be a better question?"

She thought about it for a few seconds. "What... what college are you going to?"

The dad flipped out like he'd just seen his kid score a soccer goal or something, he was so proud of her for making relevant conversation. His daughter looked so proud of herself, too. I liked the two of them a lot.

The smell of weed wafting into the park on Saturdays, people wearing shirts with swear words written in big letters, people swearing loudly when they lose a game - I get it, you want to have fun, and it's a fun park. Just, not near the 5 year old kid. Please.

Disclaimer: happened to my coworker, not me.

Boy was taking a long time to pick his prizes in arcade, so CW moved on to help the next in line, a woman and her daughter.

Boy's mom: Excuse me, but my son is still picking out his prizes.
CW: It's fine, I can help two people - "
Girls' mom: Well, if your son knew manners and didnt take so long, she wouldn't have to help both of us at once.

Commence catfight, yelling, etc - the word "bitch" was thrown around a few times. I'm surprised they didn't demand to see a manager.

Next customer in line after those two had left just shook her head and went "some days you just really hate people, don't you?"

Our park has pokemon stops at every major ride, and two gyms. The games department (team Valor FTW) had a war with the rides department (team Instinct) to keep control of the gyms - guess who's winning.

You saw people walking around with their phones out all the time, and people actually talking to each other. It was nice to see.

Unfortunately, you couldn't reach any stops from the line.

My biggest pet peeve. I'll be explaining how to play a game, and parents just talk over me, even if their kid is the only one playing. 9/10 times they explain it wrong, too, and the kid just ends up confused.

It was 95 in freedom units (35C), humidity made it feel like a sauna on the line. Two guys showed up with a cooler, handed out Amp drinks to all the workers they saw. I was so stunned when he handed it to me I don't even think I thanked him. I can't have caffeine, but I gave it to our stock leader who spent the day dragging ~50lbs of boxes around the park. You've never seen somebody look so grateful.

But seriously, I see a lot of people that want to make a positive change in the world, but just aren't sure how. This is how. Spend 5 bucks on a few gatorades, bring them to construction workers or people working outside on a hot day. That's all it takes. Even awkwardly over-chatty customers can be a blessing on super slow days with nothing better to do.

She meant to drop in a 5, but a 20 got stuck to it. She didn't notice until I pointed it out.

She seemed completely shocked that I would tell her, instead of just ignoring it and keeping the 20 for myself. Honestly, I don't care how much money the park makes - I don't work on commission. I'd rather you have a good time and not realize you were missing 20 bucks when you got home.

We shouldn't, but everybody does it. Winner-every-time games where the prizes are small, if you don't get the prize you want then we'll switch it out for you, as long as you're not a dick. Lying about bigger prizes, we almost never do, except for super nice customers and if they're *really* close already.

Be nice to your carnies, people. Playing multiple times won't hurt your chances, either.

I'd been waiting to use this line all season, finally got to do it on my last day. At the start of the day, we have these giant wads of singles to make change for people. Normally people don't comment on it, but you can tell they want to.

Finally somebody said something though, and they thought I was hilarious.

(this one's a doozy. there's a tl;dr at the bottom)

Oh boy. Frog fishing is a winner-every-time game, so naturally most of the time you win a small prize (little stuffed animal sharks or dolphins). We'd just opened, and when frog fishing opens there's always a crazy rush.

There's a family of an older white guy, a younger asian woman, and her son. Idk the relation between the three of them, not gonna think about it. Guy is fishing, pulls up a frog, I check the frog and they got a small prize, yayy!!!

Strike one: guy keeps fishing. Like, I just told you that you got a prize, what makes you think you should keep going? But anyways. I get them their prize, dad asks me if he could buy one of the medium prizes, a little stuffed alligator. I say sure, as soon as I'm done running everybody else's game (people are literally pressing against the fence, it's so crowded) then I can call the office to check the price.

Maybe 10 minutes later, I'm done running all the games, go back to the family.

Me: "I'm just gonna go call the office, check that price for you, I'll just be a minute."
Guy: "Why don't you just *know* the price? We can't be the only people in the world that want to buy a prize."

Strike two. Apparently, I am expected to know every price for each of the half-dozen prizes we have at each of the dozen or so games around the park.

But anyways. I shake it off, go into the back to call the office, so I can't see the family anymore. Office doesn't pick up - it's a busy day, can't blame them. I ask the girl I was working with if she happened to know the price, she tells me it'll probably be ~$15, but isn't sure, so I go back out to the family.

Me:"It'll probably be at least $15 but we aren't sure, if you wanna go ride some rides and come back in 10-15 minutes I'll definitely have the price for you by then."
Guy: We don't have 15 minutes, we need to leave now. (Note - the park opened less than 2 hours ago. Apparently, they spent $50 for the three of them to come in, play frog fishing, and then leave). $15 seems like a good price, here's a $20.
Me: ...but that might not actually be the price, I wasn't able to get a hold of anybody to tell me the price.
Guy: I don't understand. Why can't you just take a 20 and give me the prize he wants?

Strike three. I start explaining it's not up to me, the prices are set and I need to get confirmation from the office, he's yelling at me, eventually I just say welp, i'm gonna go try to call them again.

Finally I get a hold of somebody who tells me it's $20 to buy the alligator, I go back to tell them and see my coworker running towards frog fishing saying "ma'am, you can't be in here, ma'am - "

Strike fucking four. The mom - this grown ass woman - has climbed over the fence and is literally pulling a stuffed alligator off the wall. She doesn't see anything wrong with what she's done, she's just smiling and pointing at it saying "this is the one he wanted!" Like, lady, you're stealing right now, do you realize that? Like are you aware of how that is actually illegal

Jfc. These people. My coworker was stunned, I just shoved the alligator at the guy and told him to drop his twenty in the box, I even apologized for the wait. Not even a "thank you."

Customer service, man.

TL;DR: man doesn't understand carnival games, sends in his terrifyingly young asian wife to steal a stuffed animal.

God, I love these kids. When they want to play a game, parents pull out a little baggy and say "Now this will use 2 of your dollars, and you'll have 5 left. That's enough for a small ice cream, but not a small dippin' dots."

These kids never scream at their parents to play again, they never complain when they lose, and they're the happiest and most grateful when they win. They're always polite, tend to say 'thank you' without being pushed or reminded, and are just overall good kids. I'm not a parent, but I've seen a lot of parenting styles, and without a doubt these are the parents with the best-behaved kids.

Seriously, we just want you to have a good time. If you have a little kid, we'll point out duck pond for you; if you want to try your luck at a giant prize, we'll point you in the right direction. If you're playing Pokemon Go, we'll tell you about the giant Charizard at ring toss or the smaller pikachu at frog fishing. And don't be afraid to say "hey, I need a prize for my daughter/nephew/girlfriend/dog, where should I go?"

I have a few more if y'all want them, so long as this post doesn't die in a hole.