CrackheadGermanSheppie
4448
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Artist Ozoneserpent
Jul 7, 2026 7:28 PM
CrackheadGermanSheppie
4448
227
42
Artist Ozoneserpent
FanBladeFleshlight
ngl, lewds and shit aside, I'd cuddle the FUCK out of a Vaporeon. Water body that can control it's temp? I'd never be hot in the summer of cold in the winter. Easily a 10/10 replacement for a body pillow or a fan.
ButtscratchMcPherson
QuanticChaos
michiyl
That'll certainly increase not just the heart rate
arthorpostmortem
the strap on her life preserver is under her bathing suit
Rangar
I mean, if that doesn't get him back up, just dig a hole next to him, roll him in, and cover him.
Dunes8
Yeah, until you hear an unfortunate sound
CrackheadGermanSheppie
oooof... **CRUNCH*** yeah no thank you
Arcygenical
Oh no, I've been stung by a jelly fish...
jethroismaxbaer5772
Nah, I don't think I want chest compressions performed on my junk. I believe that would hurt a lot.
VulpesIncendium
Aeolys
Would a Vaporeon be cool to the touch or just as warm as any other dog?
VulpesIncendium
I always imagined they'd be slightly cool to the touch, but maybe not? Maybe it would be more like cuddling a big, sentient hot water bottle!
SlyeFox
Probably along the lines of being like a dolphin.
CrisprCAS
Hey guys did you know that
FizzleBurger
...in terms of human companionship, Flareon is objectively the most huggable Pokémon?
TresusIbor
WHY YES I DID
Florafiel
She's bit mistaken, but her hands are in a right place.
MipMop
Step 2:
IMarkEverythingISayAsNSFWBecauseModsDontKnowWhatMatureMeans
NSFW
CrackheadGermanSheppie
As well as her heart?
Florafiel
Absolutely.
CrackheadGermanSheppie
ButtscratchMcPherson
You realize that in CPR you push your hands down hard enough to crack ribs, right. He's got going to get a handjob, he's going to have his nards popped like grapes.