An old shark is still a shark.....500 yr old ish shark found, first words were apparently "rawwrrrr I'm an almost zombie shark rawrrrrr.....(unconfirmed)

Dec 18, 2017 10:07 AM

melancholyterminator

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18ft Greenland shark found at least 272 years old possibly even as old as 572 years............that thing has lived so long I legitimately can't even remember what was going on back then, the 1500's........I.........I....... got nothin....

And no I'm not cheating by googling it,

http://www.ibtimes.com/512-year-old-shark-believed-be-oldest-living-vertebrate-found-north-atlantic-2628368?amp=1&__twitter_impression=true

Those are the toxic piss sharks, right? (Extremely high urea concentrations in the tissue)?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

'Found'. I.e. you 'found' the poor bastard on the end of your massive metal hook.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I like how they're not certain about the century but theyre Damn sure it ends in 72 years old

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

“There can be only one” shark probably.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

armor was still pretty lame and not cool like dark souls

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

"Get off my seaweed patch!"

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Either way it ends up on 72... Might be also 1972 yo

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Sharks age was confirmed when it start disapproving of everything.....

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

1500 was around the time the scientific method was introduced

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Remember that in Iceland this, buried in sand, and left to rot for 6-12 weeks is a national dish

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

DNA harvested for longevity ppills for sure!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Lives in very cold water and has an extremely slow metabolism.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnd they killed it

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

ROV Pilot here. We saw a Greenland shark run into the blowout preventer on the Thunderhorse oil rig.

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Is anyone else confused as how they were able to figure out the 2 year part at the end but still cant figure out a 300 year gap?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Pharrell Williams was still young lad. https://imgur.com/5KJVdjH

8 years ago | Likes 35 Dislikes 1

Literally everything I've heard about it was "No, they didn't really find a 512 yr old shark." This is the ONLY place running with the 500

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 2

year old bullshit story. Way to go, imgur.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 2

Ah don't be such a cynic, it's a ballpark and educated guess,

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 3

I always upvote fish

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

So old Pepperidge Farm doesn’t remember.

8 years ago | Likes 157 Dislikes 1

Do old that Pepperidge farm wasn't even a glint in the milkman's eye.

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

did they kill it?

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

I hope not :(

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Possibly not; seems those bolt cutters are there to break the hook.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

@TheMajesticHarpyEagle

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

True fact?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Not quite. Greenland sharks do live for centuries but the study never actually stated exactly how long

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Ah.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Some animals like sharks and gators are so tough they don't die unless their environment changes

8 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

Sometimes I think its a shame that the ocean cooled and all the Megalodon died. But then if they werent dead, no one would ever swim again.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Copernicus was thinking that maybe the earth went round the sun

8 years ago | Likes 52 Dislikes 2

Silly fool, what did he know

8 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 1

now we all know the Eart is flat

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The Vatican was thinking maybe they should burn this Copernicus dude.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

How do they figure those dates. “Eehhhh might be 272 maybe 572 five or take a 100 years”

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

With the help of a mathematical model analyzing the lens and the cornea that linked size with age, researchers found a way to predict age.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It's in the article. Reading them often helps.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That's obviously a vicious rock

8 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 2

Not even vicious. Blind, slow, too lazy to attack living things

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Rock beats paper scissors and fishing boat

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

It looks like a Pokemon! Primal Sharpedo!

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

How the heck do they know how old a shark is? Cut it open and count the rings?

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

funnily enough for some species yes. Not for this type of shark though https://www.livescience.com/61210-shark-not-512-years-old.html

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

For some shark species, scientists use bony structures such as calcified vertebraeto track their age, reading rings that form in the harden.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Well kiss my ass

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Henry VIII was around. The mona lisa was painted. And Martin Luther invented Protestants

8 years ago | Likes 1093 Dislikes 2

Is that when they matched for Lincoln? /s

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Ottomans were being Ottomans

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

When men were men, and women were men. Boats were wood and bullets were round. And dogs were men!

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Keanu Reeves was young.

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Underappreciated comment

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

And there were some old-ass trees saying "Look at that young motherfucker."

8 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

1.5k years of religious tradition vs one shitpost

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The Roman Empire still existed in the form of the Byzantine Empire.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

He was just a widdo baby a sharkey warkey then....

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Europeans were having issues settling their differences peacefully.

8 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 0

Thats about the whole human history in one sentence...

8 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

Imagine a unified europe from the middle ages and onwards. You'd all be speaking Esperanto now!

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

OP's mom was born

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Nostradamus was having some real conversation for your ass.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Don't forget Vikings breaking england, again

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Nice!!

8 years ago | Likes 61 Dislikes 1

Ezio Auditore was killing people in Rome.

8 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 0

Man it’s so amazing thinking of it’s age in that light haha.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

The Aztec empire was still around.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Only way to confirm is to cut it in half and count the rings.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The article makes it sounds like the researcher is making it up and trying not to admit it.

8 years ago | Likes 123 Dislikes 7

It's age was tested using carbon dating, they gave them selves a late margin of error just to be safe.

8 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 4

Ahhh but carbon dating isn't the most accurate. Let alone be accurate within a couple hundred years.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Not quite. AMS C14 dates can have calibrated date intervals of less than 100 years

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Damn thing's paywalled. I'm mostly concerned that they haven't accounted for the marine reservoir effect

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Got access; they did in fact account for it and for the 1950's nuclear tests

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Seems like its an uncertain age because the method of working out their age by the eyes is quite recent and has an unknown margin of error

8 years ago | Likes 56 Dislikes 2

They cut in half and counted the rings.

8 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 1

I don’t get a read like that. They mention multiple dating methods, at least one being fairly precise, and have multiple samples. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

8 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 0

multiple dating methods and I still can't get laid...

8 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

Would you like me tell you a secret? Pssst... you don’t need a method when you meet a good gal. If you just want to get laid just wait.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Psst, backatcha. Took me 46 yrs & 1 failed marriage, but I actually learned this. My comment was a joke - I got a great girl who actually

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

desires me, now. (as in, went 4 rounds + 1 glorious bj over this weekend) +1 coz your advice is spot on, yo!

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0