The secret to creating life - hoes

Apr 24, 2015 11:14 AM

bergundytomato

Views

511829

Likes

10640

Dislikes

190

Edit: Will resist FP-virgin-edit but since everyone is asking (i) NDG is telling the story about Jon and (ii) Sauce: http://thedailyshow.cc.com/videos/8b6rge/neil-degrasse-tyson

I thought this was going to turn into "the element of surprise."

11 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Did I make front page? Holy schmozzles. Paint me bergundy and call me howthewhatcarbon!

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Which one of them is the one talking?

11 years ago | Likes 24 Dislikes 2

I was also confused. I found the sauce: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDQwltETYds 4:30

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

lol at jon's face throughout all these panels

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

11 years ago | Likes 316 Dislikes 1

This is brilliant.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Stupid inanimate carbon rod!!

11 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

It's all just a popularity contest!

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

"What is that?" "It's an inanimate carbon rod!!" *crowd cheers*

11 years ago | Likes 32 Dislikes 0

Nice. My engagement ring is a slut.

11 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Actually your engagement ring is totally chaste...

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

relevant

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

I like Oxygen: best in pairs, but a threesome works, too.

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Carbon totally gets around, but it's just so attractive. I guess I'm just really into carbon dating.

11 years ago | Likes 56 Dislikes 0

Booo!

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Heyoooooo....

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

No lie, I was on Tumblr this morning and I read a post talking about how offended they were by NDT pushing a slut-shaming agenda

11 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Man, tumblr really has some humorless and toxic subcultures. Echo chambers are a scary thing.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

I like the look on Jon Stewart's face "oh no not the Carbon story again".

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

GUYS I'VE GOT THE SAUCE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDQwltETYds 4:30

11 years ago | Likes 55 Dislikes 0

sir, you receive an upvote and my internet appreciation. an a short comment on my excitement. yay GR3453m0nk3y!

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

430 roast it.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

That video was literally uploaded today.

11 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

The episode barely aired last night

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Taking 2 years of chemistry A level was worth it so I can understand these jokes.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Now people will call him a sexist for using the word slut

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 3

Why? People of all the fancy genders can be sluts?

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 2

I have no idea, but people tend to do it when a guy uses the word slut

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

When a guy uses it demeaningly toward a woman, yeah, it's sexist. Not that complex?

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

So if a woman calls another woman a slut they aren't sexist? Makes sense

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

(Well, and arguably when toward a man, too, but 140 characters.)

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

(And also when a woman says it, but 140 characters.)

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

yo mommas been around the block more times than carbon

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

So what does that make the noble gasses

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Inert

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Well Xe can take six at a time so I don't know what to think

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Crazy Cat People

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

One of us.

11 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

*gases

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Abstinent.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

And the radioactive Radon?

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

He was also in an episode of the Nanny!

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I'm conflicted about the use of language in this post.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

yes, yes it is. and I'm proud it is

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Typical male chauvinism. The noble gases fuck anything that walk, get called studs. Carbon makes the same choices, gets slut shamed.

11 years ago | Likes 45 Dislikes 7

We just got to Cis and Trans metals...thank god no femnatzi's ever make it to higher lever chemistry

11 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 6

Cis and trans metals? I don't think you've worded that quite right. We have cis and trans conformations of chiral compounds

11 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Er, sorry you are right, I was trying to figure out how to explain the ligand placement in too few characters

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I don't think a lot of people realize cis was a word before gender became the flavor of the month. That and the acronym HOMO. It's Hilarious

11 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Yeah, tell that to Transsylvania.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

"You're such a homo." - "A highest occupied molecular orbital?"

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

The noble gases are inert, they don't care about no hos, they just gonna stick to their click...that's kinda their thing

11 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 0

*clique

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Asexual non gendered nobels rep!

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

*noble

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

tell that to xenon hexafluoride.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

From what I've gathered, anything involving flourine may as well be the terrorist of the chemistry world

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

check out the one with 67 protons though

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

All I'm getting from this is hoes= life

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

what is he doing with his hand?

11 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 4

throwing up a gang sign

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Making a C, the chemical symbol for carbon. o.0

11 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Carbon is life. And a ho.

11 years ago | Likes 880 Dislikes 21

False, ball is life

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

We got a double dipper

11 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 2

Double dipping carbon slut!

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I thought fluorine was the slut of the periodic table... It's the most electronegative and bonds with everything.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It's *black science man* btw

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

How about the element of surprise?

11 years ago | Likes 45 Dislikes 0

11 years ago | Likes 30 Dislikes 0

I'd say its the element of luck, given i am on the front page :$

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

What about fear?

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Slut*, Mr. Tomato.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

i cant believe youre slut-shaming carbon!

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

We are all made of stars.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Not much carbon in stars, though.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Our carbon was made in stars. http://www.livescience.com/32828-humans-really-made-stars.html

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Sure, but then it got kicked out and formed planets. The sun right now doesn't have much carbon. It's mostly much lighter elements.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

When carbon combines with itself, it becomes harder than anything else we know of.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

TIL: OP's mum is a carbon-based lifeform.

11 years ago | Likes 1211 Dislikes 4

☐ not REKT ☑ served REKTfast ☑ REKTangle ☑ eREKTile dysfunction ☑ REKT it Ralph ☑ REKTum ☑ shREKT ☑ one diREKTion ☑ the usual susREKTs

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

In all fairness, we're ALL carbon-based lifeforms, so we're all just as bad as OP's mom

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

OP's mum sure has had her fair share of adventures on imgur.

11 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

sometimes I wish i can favourite comments x).. have a +1

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

so is your mum

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

BAM! Right in the childhood!

11 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 2

Ouch, my carbon nuts.

11 years ago | Likes 225 Dislikes 4

hah! goteem!

11 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

I accidentally read "Star Talk" as "Star Trek"

11 years ago | Likes 3418 Dislikes 6

Wtf is start talk? Jin just went up a few points and then down twice as many for deception =/

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

woah wtf, that was like magic, I read it as Star Trek too...wtf? Is this magic? Trickery? Real life?

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

So did I. What the hell? This many people?

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I didn't even know I did that until this top comment. Thank you

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I didn't realize it wasn't star trek til your comment

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

fuck

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

As did I.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Me too. Until I read your comment

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I DID TOO!

11 years ago | Likes 116 Dislikes 0

STOP YELLING!

11 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 5

NO!

11 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

UGH, what the hell. I read that three times as "Star Trek" and I was thinking he must've been super young to have been on TOS.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Scrolls back to top to confirm.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Ditto.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I read it as that, didn't get it, so read it again... and STILL read star trek. +1 for helping me be less confused!

11 years ago | Likes 32 Dislikes 0

Me too! :D

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

This makes more sense, but now I'm sad :(

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Oh, thanks for pointing that out. I mean, he was brilliant in The Faculty, why not Star Trek?

11 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 0

I did too

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

*scrolls back up* ...Oh.

11 years ago | Likes 91 Dislikes 0

An oh of disappointment

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I had to re look at it. Oh my lord you are right :/

11 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

we all did

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

This is uncanny... And I'm not even a Trekkie!

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You are not alone.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I read it as Star Wars.

11 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 3

Same here, it's crazy how a brain associates words and fills them in for you

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Well you just saved me a disappointing trip to IMDB

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yup same here

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Me too

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

So did I until I saw this comment...

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Wait, it isn't?

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

NDT has been on Star GATE... with Bill Nye! It was a great episode.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Omg. I thought so too and was going crazy trying to think of what episode it was and how I could have missed him!

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Fun fact: He did a skit on "The Jon Stewart Show" as Captain Picard. It was hilarious.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Same

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I assumed "talk" was a typo and that they meant trek.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Lol i did too don't worry.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I was about to google the episode of Star Trek he was in. I was slightly suspicious because Star Trek aired in the late 60's. Thanks lol!

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I actually read it three times as Star Trek. Found it odd but continued eventually. Then I read your comment.

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I did too... I'm a bit dissapointed

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Me too, and my mind went to TNG and not the original series, and I'm thinking "He would have been an awesome Q"

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I read Stat Trak, csgo players?

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

So did I and I didn't realize until your comment!

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I 2d every reply to this comment.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Lmao I did the same exact thing!

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Star Trek> Star Talk

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Me too

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I am sad that it wasn't Star Trek.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

DAMMIT! i had to scroll up to see i fell for it too. yeah, i didnt believe u

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Pretty sure we all did

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Me too, I was trying to remember what episode Jon Stewart was in...

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Wait, it wasn't?

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Wow I skipped right over and read it as Star Wars and I still kept going...I'm so sleepy

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Shit, me too!!!

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I guess 'who didn't'?

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

So did I. TWICE.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You are the reason I now know it wasn't Star Trek.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

One of us, one of us

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

same here.... i was confused until i saw this comment... thank you,

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

So did I. Either way, pretty nifty.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The only reason I realized that I had misread "Star Talk" as "Star Trek" was because I saw your comment.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I was only corrected when reading this comment

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I did the exact same thing.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Your comment made me realize that it did not in fact say Star Trek

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Oh, I thought it was Star Trek.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Same here. Except, I've drunk 9 Carlsburg's, so I have an excuse.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You are not alone.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Am I the only one who read it as star wars...?

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I think it's a gif and it did say "Star Trek" the first time. We can't all be this unaware, right?

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

bullcrap, Fluorine is the slut of the chemistry world as it will react with pretty much anything

11 years ago | Likes 274 Dislikes 10

In that case, fluorine is the Tumblr of the periodic table

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Sounds more like the drama queen of elements.

11 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 0

More like the tumblrite

11 years ago | Likes 45 Dislikes 5

Real talk, tho: I have friends who work with F. They are high-strung, incredibly nervous and often look like they just stepped out of a war.

11 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 0

When gaming, I often name my kick ass female characters "Fluorine".

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

my high school chem teacher called fluorine a hoochie mama

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

triggeredite

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Flourine is the overly attached GF of chemistry

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Nah, Francium is the slut. Fluorine is a rapist, it takes whatever electrons it wants. Francium gives it's electron away to anything.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Fluorine is the creepy stalker that might blow up and/or kill you at any point.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yeah but Flourines' reaction tends to be unpleasant and vicious and not at all fun.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That would make fluorine a bitch not a ho

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Can confirm, absolutely true. And insanely flammable. Source: I work at a fluorine plant

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Of the 10 million or so compounds that are known today, about 9 million of those are carbon containing compounds.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Fluorine can react with Xenon, I'm pretty sure you can't get better than that

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Combining is different than reacting:)

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Or rather, one potential outcome of a reaction.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

But fluorine usually sticks to one at a time. Carbon will take up to four at the same time!

11 years ago | Likes 214 Dislikes 0

Sometimes carbon will take 5 when it really feels like it.

11 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 1

Ah, the infamous Texas carbons.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Considering I work at a plant where we produce UF6 and used to produce SF6, SbF5, and IF5... no, it doesn't usually stick to just one.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 4

pimp

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

In all of those each F atom is only bonded once- to the slut in middle.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Still just one bond per fluorine. Carbon usually forms four bonds, and can go higher in exceptional circumstances.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

But you're using multiple atoms of flourine so it still is sticking to one.

11 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

So Fluorine is basically a fan of gangbanging other elements.

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Periorgy table

11 years ago | Likes 52 Dislikes 0

You deserve more upvotes

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Honestly it felt a bit forced.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

iunderstoodthatreference.pierogi

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I was going to say it'd be a Fluorgy but that's the wrong element

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Had to think real hard before I upvoted from 69 to 70. Real hard. *wink*

11 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

But 69 only involves two people. That's not enough for carbon.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Like diamond hard?

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

So..is silicon Carbon's gangbang sister, you know because of the octet rule?

11 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

No, it's...complicated

11 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

[deleted]

[deleted]

11 years ago (deleted Aug 4, 2017 3:49 PM) | Likes 0 Dislikes 0

Ah, in 12 months, when I finish Orgo, I will get back to you two

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0