Apr 18, 2018 6:44 PM
fudgeteddy
124962
2451
59
FP Edit: Yay, F
Mentirosa30
I used a restroom where employees buzzed you in. While sitting I could hear the door buzz. Scared more pee out of me
User1044
I just respond "appointments only"
babowaygook
I live in Korea and they have a system for this. Wanna check occupied? Knock on the door. If you're using the toilet, knock back. Done!
Tadracket
Beat on it several times, really hard, just in case they are sleeping in there.
BigTex1
Taking a crap nap
YupItsARepost
Yup, it's a repost
AstroExplained
Psh that's why we have gaps in our stalls! You can just look through and say hi!
txmount
When someone rattles the door of my stall, I put on my creepiest sexy-voice (think Buffalo Bill, "I'd fuck me...") and say "Come in."
Sphinxycat
Ok thanks will do
seafoamistasty
Just don't flush so they have a gift waiting for them.
PrisonMichaelScott
Please don't. I have fears.
Locolarue
Don't forget to let your kid jiggle the handle constantly for five minutes.
DrSlapAlot
I like to do this but then pull out my keys and jingle them at the doorknob.
ochermes28
Scream “you pervert!!”
giveittomestraightlikeapearcidermadefrom100percentpears
I weirded out my brother's friend the other day. He turned the handle on the toilet door so hard it unlocked itself. I said instinctively >
"well, this is my fetish..." i was mid-shit while playing checkers on my phone...
cryptumsaga
Does no one knock first and wait for a response anymore?
RubberDuck720
ThisIsRowdy
My response is always an unintelligible combination of “I’m in here” and “just a minute”.
Retromorphic
I'm in a minute, just a here or I'm just here a minute?
No, add +10 to anxiety and mash the words together a little more. Probably something like “I’mjuminhere”.
MickedyArk
Also remember to knock on locked bathroom doors,
Shuey
That's gonna speed up the process
thepieisimplicit
I just look for feet on the floor and attempt the empty one...
PolyphaseAvatron
Not sure why the occupant would succumb to "paralyzing anxiety" and not say, "I'm in here," "I'll be out in a moment," or something...
ilovefunsocks
Where I work we have single serve bathrooms and people either try to much to get into locked ones or stand outside of empty ones
ClearBlue
Also shout, “Police! Come on out, you two.”
jomama64
shhep
No, shout HE'S IN HERE.
wardenda
ESTOY POOPIN
STran526
One time a girl kicked in my bathroom door because she thought it was her friend in the stall and she was joking around.
Craizie
Just yell come in on the 2nd time.
MelonCollieAndTheInfiniteSadness
OCCUPIED. OCCUPIED. YES I'M STILL IN HERE FUCK OFF.
GnomeHomo
bogus1983
"I gotta go!" Me too, that's why I'm in here...
boywiththehappypenis
After smashing on locked door hundreds of times, I always like to slide a mirror underneath to confirm it hasn't been locked by pranksters.
itsimpossibletofindausernamethatisnttaken
I don't keep a mirror handy so I just substitute with my phone recording video.
kojenk
Just shove your head underneath while screaming your lungs out
I was 100% this happened, grabbed the top of the stall and pulled up. Huge black guy taking a shit. I was like, 13, from 99,9% white country
my brain just shorted.
Yeah. I can't even.
wiilyc22
I always feel bad for turning the knob, or pushing the handle. I know I hate when people do the try 40 times and bang on the door.
TsunamiJohn
Some public restroom handles are hard to push, so I make sure it's actually locked. I'll take awkwardness over holding it in needlessly.
I agree with the double check. I’m talking about the 40 odd times.
Shamwowser
I usually knock, if no one is there no one sees me look stupid, if someone's there they'll appreciate me not breaking the door down.
CultofCedar
Last week I was in a stall taking a leak and some dude shook the door so hard it opened and said sorry didn’t know someone was in here
rockyhorrorisme
Did you pee on him?
demoncandy
I like to slide a knife under the door, just in case they need it...for things
I get the reference
sombrerohorsewagon
Reply ‘housekeeping’ to throw them off
Sutashi
Saw a lady go get a manager because the single bathroom was locked. Manager asked Did you consider someone may be using it?
exosquadwasmyfavoriteshowwheniwasachild
*be here for manly love, 2:15AM sharp*
bigcheezefartz
Sea Bass?
CaptnMurica88
Kick his ass sea bass!
BumbleBeeBeardedGingerBear
Then they walk away like they've been concussed, leaving the door wide open.
"Occupado, chief."
Maybe he didn't even realise the power of his own grip and just thought he was giving the door a light and breezy nudge.
crowkiller06
“His own grip” ......because, ya know...men’s room(?).
Maybe it was Nick Offerman trying to gently open the door.
Eldibs
If I'm in a locked stall and someone barges in, they're getting stabbed.
SneakEFoxxe
While he’s obviously either a lying cunt or an incomprehensible moron either way, did you at any point say “there’s someone in here”?
Maybe he wasn’t bright. It was like a 5 second thing and I thought he was trying to enter the stall next to me
EmmyHearts
I hope you said “the locked door wasn’t a clue?”
PipeandSlippers
I hope he said "Good, that proves you really want me" more
I was more confused and said what the fuck? Thought he was opening the stall next to me
SugarTitillates
I would say "are you here to shake me off?"
Mentirosa30
I used a restroom where employees buzzed you in. While sitting I could hear the door buzz. Scared more pee out of me
User1044
I just respond "appointments only"
babowaygook
I live in Korea and they have a system for this. Wanna check occupied? Knock on the door. If you're using the toilet, knock back. Done!
Tadracket
Beat on it several times, really hard, just in case they are sleeping in there.
BigTex1
Taking a crap nap
YupItsARepost
Yup, it's a repost
AstroExplained
Psh that's why we have gaps in our stalls! You can just look through and say hi!
txmount
When someone rattles the door of my stall, I put on my creepiest sexy-voice (think Buffalo Bill, "I'd fuck me...") and say "Come in."
Sphinxycat
Ok thanks will do
seafoamistasty
Just don't flush so they have a gift waiting for them.
PrisonMichaelScott
Please don't. I have fears.
Locolarue
Don't forget to let your kid jiggle the handle constantly for five minutes.
DrSlapAlot
I like to do this but then pull out my keys and jingle them at the doorknob.
ochermes28
Scream “you pervert!!”
giveittomestraightlikeapearcidermadefrom100percentpears
I weirded out my brother's friend the other day. He turned the handle on the toilet door so hard it unlocked itself. I said instinctively >
giveittomestraightlikeapearcidermadefrom100percentpears
"well, this is my fetish..." i was mid-shit while playing checkers on my phone...
cryptumsaga
Does no one knock first and wait for a response anymore?
RubberDuck720
ThisIsRowdy
My response is always an unintelligible combination of “I’m in here” and “just a minute”.
Retromorphic
I'm in a minute, just a here or I'm just here a minute?
ThisIsRowdy
No, add +10 to anxiety and mash the words together a little more. Probably something like “I’mjuminhere”.
MickedyArk
Also remember to knock on locked bathroom doors,
Shuey
That's gonna speed up the process
thepieisimplicit
I just look for feet on the floor and attempt the empty one...
PolyphaseAvatron
Not sure why the occupant would succumb to "paralyzing anxiety" and not say, "I'm in here," "I'll be out in a moment," or something...
ilovefunsocks
Where I work we have single serve bathrooms and people either try to much to get into locked ones or stand outside of empty ones
ClearBlue
Also shout, “Police! Come on out, you two.”
jomama64
shhep
No, shout HE'S IN HERE.
wardenda
ESTOY POOPIN
STran526
One time a girl kicked in my bathroom door because she thought it was her friend in the stall and she was joking around.
Craizie
Just yell come in on the 2nd time.
MelonCollieAndTheInfiniteSadness
OCCUPIED. OCCUPIED. YES I'M STILL IN HERE FUCK OFF.
GnomeHomo
bogus1983
"I gotta go!" Me too, that's why I'm in here...
boywiththehappypenis
After smashing on locked door hundreds of times, I always like to slide a mirror underneath to confirm it hasn't been locked by pranksters.
itsimpossibletofindausernamethatisnttaken
I don't keep a mirror handy so I just substitute with my phone recording video.
kojenk
Just shove your head underneath while screaming your lungs out
shhep
I was 100% this happened, grabbed the top of the stall and pulled up. Huge black guy taking a shit. I was like, 13, from 99,9% white country
shhep
my brain just shorted.
boywiththehappypenis
Yeah. I can't even.
Retromorphic
wiilyc22
I always feel bad for turning the knob, or pushing the handle. I know I hate when people do the try 40 times and bang on the door.
TsunamiJohn
Some public restroom handles are hard to push, so I make sure it's actually locked. I'll take awkwardness over holding it in needlessly.
wiilyc22
I agree with the double check. I’m talking about the 40 odd times.
Shamwowser
I usually knock, if no one is there no one sees me look stupid, if someone's there they'll appreciate me not breaking the door down.
CultofCedar
Last week I was in a stall taking a leak and some dude shook the door so hard it opened and said sorry didn’t know someone was in here
rockyhorrorisme
Did you pee on him?
demoncandy
I like to slide a knife under the door, just in case they need it...for things
CultofCedar
I get the reference
sombrerohorsewagon
Reply ‘housekeeping’ to throw them off
Sutashi
Saw a lady go get a manager because the single bathroom was locked. Manager asked Did you consider someone may be using it?
exosquadwasmyfavoriteshowwheniwasachild
*be here for manly love, 2:15AM sharp*
bigcheezefartz
Sea Bass?
CaptnMurica88
Kick his ass sea bass!
BumbleBeeBeardedGingerBear
Then they walk away like they've been concussed, leaving the door wide open.
exosquadwasmyfavoriteshowwheniwasachild
"Occupado, chief."
boywiththehappypenis
Maybe he didn't even realise the power of his own grip and just thought he was giving the door a light and breezy nudge.
crowkiller06
“His own grip” ......because, ya know...men’s room(?).
boywiththehappypenis
Maybe it was Nick Offerman trying to gently open the door.
Eldibs
If I'm in a locked stall and someone barges in, they're getting stabbed.
SneakEFoxxe
While he’s obviously either a lying cunt or an incomprehensible moron either way, did you at any point say “there’s someone in here”?
CultofCedar
Maybe he wasn’t bright. It was like a 5 second thing and I thought he was trying to enter the stall next to me
EmmyHearts
I hope you said “the locked door wasn’t a clue?”
PipeandSlippers
I hope he said "Good, that proves you really want me" more
CultofCedar
I was more confused and said what the fuck? Thought he was opening the stall next to me
SugarTitillates
I would say "are you here to shake me off?"