Gurlyouthickerthanabowlofoatmeal
486628
10814
428
Apr 17, 2017 11:52 PM
Gurlyouthickerthanabowlofoatmeal
486628
10814
428
FarNorthFarLeft
Allah Snack Bar. Never saw that one coming. Damn brilliant.
AllHailMegtaron
Does anyone ever wonders what the roasters may look like?
DeanOMiite
I love /roastme, as long as the roasts don't start with "you look like" because that's just lazy. So most of these are pretty good!
Estoyp00ping
#9 is spot on w the Walt Disney comparison.
TheQuestionFewpeopledoFeweventhinktoaskthequestion
and gene wilder too
xcopperx
That was the best lol
gappedteeth
yaaaasss, that one stood out to me a lot
SergeiBoobtitsky
Why does he have a window in between his living room and kitchen?
MarkGuy
#8 now that's how you roast someone hahaha. Insult both of them based on looks and make it funny and original
loveThemLulz
I'm surprised that the last girl (supposedly with mental health issues) is asking for "roast me" comments. Thats got to be counter productiv
youmeandabottleofwhiskey
The chick on the right in the first picture looks like the girl from How I Met Your Mother.
TitaniumTeddyBear
I don't like these. They are rarely clever enough to be worth the time.
EternalSenshi
Doesn't #11 look like a Littlefinger junior?
TheZulthar
Lost it at #22
tomyironmane
Well, considering he'd be getting paid for something he couldn't likely give away...
legthief
That sub should ban schoolkids from submitting themselves and/or each other.
SmityWerbenYagerManJensen
#23 is far less likely to type rawr XD in everything than
Lunchbox450
#16: First man inducted into the WNBA
YourMumKnowsMe
WNBA?
willundrskor
Women's National Basketball Assoc.
TheGiggityGuy
Most of these are new to me. +1
RideTheStimutacs
Why do people include the lazy ass "you're a girl so you're a slut" and "you're brown so ISIS" in their dumps? They're not clever at all.
DerRattenfngerVonHameln
Exactly because of their mediocrity. It's a reference point, a zero, an ugly girlfriend.
RideTheStimutacs
I can find mediocrity anywhere. It's just bad here. Or maybe Roastme is so threadbare of cleverness that this IS the "good" content.
ninmonkey
Now you've got it
schmoo38
"Couldn't be butcher." Ha ha.
UrsaUrsa
Highlight of the post! :D
DogInBoots
Wow. I didn't get that one untill I saw your comment :-)
MundoCani
I showed that one to my wife. She didn't find it as amusing as me. Or even a little *sigh*
Hushpups
OH i thought they were trying to say she wants to look like rhea butcher but couldnt
dghammer
The best of the litter.
lDAHO
She couldn't be any butcher. Any of them. All the types.
Sephority
My friend didn't get that one
modsm20
soturi88
Is this from parks & rec?
modsm20
Lol nope youtube i think
Someobscurereferencemaybe4peoplewillunderstand
That's actually one of the best roasts I've seen, most are just like "you look like you'd be a cunt", but that was actually a play on words
Anthraxwastaken
It feels like most of these are either "you're a slut", you're retarded", or "you're gay" it gets kind of boring after a while
Phenomeno
1/ I don't really understand how the gay ones are insults. Beyond that, the issue is none of these roasts are personal. Calling someone
Phenomeno
2/ a slut isn't a roast unless there's truth behind it. You have to target something that's true, something they're insecure about.
god0fthunder
Found the gay slut.
Someobscurereferencemaybe4peoplewillunderstand
The "best" ones are when it's an attractive girl so they're just like "you look like you have a terrible personality and no friends"
TSMTSMTSM
I swear this comment chain is in every "roast me" dump. Not that I disagree tho
thedarkcanuck
What the fuck is a bathroom magician?
Barrett50CaI
If you have to ask, you can't afford it
TheDivineUsersub
Didn't you read? He makes jizz disappear.
Mikeiller
I'm not sure but it sounds incredibly pornographic.
SirFluffles
"Making guys jizz disappear after a gloryhole session doesn't make you a magician." Laughed so hard I woke the gf up.
wellthatsjustyouropinion
+1 for making me feel like this
ramjam18
Producer: Greg Daniels, Producer: Greg Daniels, Producer: Greg Daniels, Prod-- ooh wait.
rationalizerFI
Who's the producer?
ramjam18
Bill Gates
gunlover123
not sure
DisguisedLizardThing
I think some guy named Dan... Dan Greggels?
MexicanCokeIsDelicioso
Daniel Gregs
ramjam18
Drake Gayniels
PopeyeTheSailor
creaothceann
She got that Sasha Grey vibe
Refmylife
Ha! These are funny because they're mean.
TwatSprinkle
That's the whole point. It's literally what they are asking for.
ExplainThisJoke
well, they asked for it... literally
CripplingDepressionAndWaterPoloMyAss
I love how this isn't fresh, but instead stolen from my last 2 posts. Goodjob! Not even a day!
GerhardRammelhausen
Dude, your post is way longer, has a worse title and the first picture isn't any good, so maybe get your head out of your ass and fuck off.
CripplingDepressionAndWaterPoloMyAss
Goodjob! Your posts are worse. Maybe try harder
GerhardRammelhausen
At least I don't cry about it under other peoples posts. Also that thing about throwing rocks and glass houses.
hineyruler
Can someone explain the "hates poor people" one to me please
ajpimpsalll
here for the same
AfroSamuraiRM
It's definitely your typical takes dick for money roast. That's it. Not really anything special. Not sure what the other comment even is.
Csel
title of the thread said she voted for trump because she hates poor people, but the roaster seems to have roasted the poster not the girl
hineyruler
Oh, so like someone willingly taking it up the ass? Maybe the poster was her bf? I still don't really get it but I appreciate you tryin hah
DancingPanther
snapcastermeme
So fresh I've never seen most of them. +1 for your efforts
Ruhig
And most of them went beyond the typical "UR UGLY N FAT" weak trash these are normally full of, to actual cutting critiques! Refreshing!
Svartlebee
They did though. Most were brown=Isis and girl=slut or ugly.
StunnedGoofy
I think ive seen at least half before....
Ruhig
New to me I guess, though I admittedly got fed up with the repetitive garbage these collections became, and skipped a lot.
zenmaster11
SpongeBob !
Mavgurian
Not even that harsh.
Buhbasaur
Damn accurate though.
SheDevilinaSnuggie
I gasped audibly at that one. Poor lad.
Kommadore
Last one seems to be on the top right of the hot vs crazy graph.
RobertEmmet
Hold my beer!
Sugarcrotch
i know they say dont stick your dick in crazy but thats my favorite place to stick it
CoMoHouston
Interestingly enough I agree, really makes you wonder just how good the crazy ones are....
TheFabulousFuehrer
The very best in my experience.
Sugarcrotch
yep they can make all the crazy worth while... its like paying for sex but instead of money its your sanity and self esteem and respect
ExplainThisJoke
spookysexyskeleton
shes so cute !
dennydorko
Yeah...just seems like a non sequitur.
joot
The implication is she got rich by whoring herself.
ExplainThisJoke
http://p.fod4.com/p/media/5c597eb60b/uF9MjJo3QIaijySXC4iL_Confused%20Christian%20Bale.gif
OnlyPostsGetRekt
You know whom I hate? People that hate people!
philipjennings
There's only 2 things I hate in this world. Racism and the Dutch.
Csel
title of the thread said she voted for trump because she hates poor people, but the roaster seems to have roasted the poster not the girl
GerhardRammelhausen
Nah, it's about the girl and that she only has money because she's a golddigger. So she only has to lie down and spread her cheeks.
ExplainThisJoke
I got that part, but what was the joke? something about sex, I guess? but what did it have to do with the pic, poor people, or the friend?
BudandIan
Roasters don't like people who sign their friends up to get roasted
astrielx
As the guy below said... The roaster inferred that the girl got rich by getting paid for sex.
ExplainThisJoke
http://p.fod4.com/p/media/5c597eb60b/uF9MjJo3QIaijySXC4iL_Confused%20Christian%20Bale.gif
RideTheStimutacs
"female picture = slut lol get it" is the logic of a lot of really uncreative people. I don't know why people include them in dumps here.
HoaryP
Oh my god my husband's photo is on here. This is so fucking hilarious
spacecatts
Dot
Boopbeepbeep
Is it either #11 or #29 ? Those are the only ones who maybe look old enough to be married.
junjito
It's 11
Boopbeepbeep
Thank you
ChadParks1
Which one?
tehmatser
Spongebob?
[deleted]
[deleted]
ifyouonlyknew21
stalk much??
idontenglishsorry
well fucking sherlock right here
shouldistayorshouldigo
Ur married to fucking LittleFinger?
HoaryP
Nice work, ForeveraKritik!
Madchair
how... how.. how did you do that
rudejohn
It's not that complicated. Click on her profile, submitted images, look for one that might be a pic of her husband. Probably took 3 minutes.
ForeveraKritik
4 minutes, actually.
coughcoughmeow
I hope it's the magician. He looks like he'd be fun.
Yodaloid
Dude you have to tell us which one
HoaryP
It's #11 -- the cute one ;)
Darkspire
Good ole Chester.
NotThatJoeYouKnow
#10 that might be a compliment
peskyboner
A backhanded compliment is still a roast. Strangers have told me I look like Leonardo DiCaprio. My friends say I look like Leo with leukemia
OnlyPostsGetRekt
Lowkey sort of yeah
TheQuestionFewpeopledoFeweventhinktoaskthequestion
did you see the two in the back ground one looks like a girl version of that guy from perks of being a wallflower and the other looks like
TheQuestionFewpeopledoFeweventhinktoaskthequestion
amy fairer fowler from big bang theory
aleister94
depends how autistic
Cilvaa
Exactly, it has degrees. Some people with ASD go unnoticed as their social skills are only slightly impaired. Others have it severe..
DontTazeMeBrah
Dustin Hoffman, 'Rain Man,' look retarded, act retarded, not retarded. Counted toothpicks, cheated cards. Autistic, sho'. Not retarded.
DontTazeMeBrah
You know Tom Hanks, 'Forrest Gump.' Slow, yes. Retarded, maybe. Braces on his legs.
DontTazeMeBrah
But he charmed the pants off Nixon and won a ping-pong competition. That ain't retarded.
DontTazeMeBrah
Peter Sellers, "Being There." Infantile, yes. Retarded, no. You went full retard, man.
hammersquirrel
I wouldn't turn down a screechy handjob from her
Carmichael106
They're usually thinly veiled compliments like, "I bet you banged 20 guys before you high school."
CinnamonBunny
That's exactly what I thought
PhenTsoksar
I would have gone with a constipated Hilary Swank with Bell's Palsey
GoogleFucker
She looks like Simmons from Agents of Shield. Then again, Simmons looks like Emma Watson and Keira Knightley mixed together
diphenhydraminehcl50mg
yup. she pretty kawaii.
Gayforbae
That's exactly what I was thinking
MapleCurry
YES!!
BudandIan
Aye! That's what I thought lol
eelero
I thought the same. But a bit... puffier?
Gayforbae
Bloated?
clln86
Spot on! She's even dressed like Simmons.
lintwizard
Yeah! The resemblance is uncanny.
Toothlessgiraffe
It might just be me, but I find the shirt and sweater combo very attractive on people
AndreKroon
It's probably because it isn't really meant to be attractive.
MoooCow
What about cows?