I couldn't be a hotel maid. Can you imagine how much semen you have to clean?

May 5, 2016 5:28 AM

FP edit: Always a pleasure when everyone upvotes me to the front. Feel free to send whatever. Boobs, butts, boobs and butts, doesn't matter. Also not my work but a guy who's name is Bert Kreischer.

I think the trick is to try NOT imagining it.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

All white? Racist dicks!!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Heheh... dicks.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Why isn't the brown one bigger than the others?

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Now, we need step-by-step tutorial.

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

I didn't even know this was a thing!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

probably less than your mom has to clean when she does you laundry.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I'm kinda disappointed there's not a black one that's like 3 mattresses long.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Or is that cock?

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Haven't seen this in a while

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Glad I'm not the only one

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

LOL - clean

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I will practice the fine art of bed linen origami during my next holiday.

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

It's proper name is bedlinigami

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Do you know how many bed sheets are shaped like dicks?! The best kinds!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Creativity is key.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Hotel cockery

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Yuuuup. Been there, done that. Word of advice: NEVER EVER rent a room with a hot tub.

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

What's the story?

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

There's been a few, haha. Nothing I could type in 120 characters. There have been handfuls of questionable goo at least.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

the story is about "the water is not changed often", I guess

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

This is a thing people do ....? This is why we can't have nice things.

10 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

Come on usersub! You can do it!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Someone...I won't say who...has a dick fetish..

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I am literally dribbling with excitement the next time I stay in a hotel.

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Yes bruv me too haha

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

"Let's go honey it's almost check out," "One second. I just gotta... Do a thing."

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Makes the dish towel chicken look - kinda chicken!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It's gross that people just throw their semen everywhere only when they're in hotel rooms. Savages

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Um, I'm going to need step by step instructions on how to fold my sheets into a giant dong, please.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I didn't know this was a thing that people do, now I'm glad I know... because I will be doing it. +1

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Better than this:

10 years ago | Likes 89 Dislikes 0

Not only was the subject strangled to death with phone chord, but the sick fucks also shrunk her head. Look how small it is now!

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I entirely disagree.

10 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

What a dick move.

10 years ago | Likes 98 Dislikes 4

Going for the low hanging fruit I see. Still, I've got to upvote you for it.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

10 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Username checks out.

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

How are there this many pictures of hotel linen penises? Is this some kind of worldwide tradition?

10 years ago | Likes 967 Dislikes 2

It will be now.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It is now

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

People learned to do it because it gets internet points.

10 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

Yea like why is this a thing? Then I think - sigh - figures

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It damn well should be.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I reckon its the same person who works at a hotel as a maid.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I stay at hotels often enough that I should, nay, will do this from now on

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

probably just 1 person.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It is now.

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

maybe it was one person who stays at a lot of hotels and just took pictures every time he left

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

If you don't do this after ejaculating in a hotel bed they don't change the sheets. Pay it forward bro.

10 years ago | Likes 350 Dislikes 3

Are you saying that they don't necessarily change the sheets before each new customer? Because I just assumed...

10 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

Ethical upstanding hotels would.. I still ask for fresh Linens any time I stay in any lodging.

10 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 1

So you're saying my ex DID get pregnant from sleeping in a dirty hotel room? Ah fuck I feel like a dick now, I got phonecalls to make...

10 years ago | Likes 19 Dislikes 0

I was thinking the same thing as I checked the number of images at the bottom. Nice....

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I just wonder why apparently so many people have this skill.

10 years ago | Likes 60 Dislikes 0

Parallel evolution at its best!

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That art degree is good for something after all.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Well after the craze of making it look like a body are you surprised? I'm excited for what's next!!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Well there was a tutorial post here about two years ago. It was a napkin though so you mileage may very.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

My friends and I do this whenever we go to a hotel. It's actually really easy to make.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Maybe one person does this everywhere s/he goes and this is the album containing their life's work.

10 years ago | Likes 30 Dislikes 0

I draw stick figure smut in every hotel. I'm not good about saving them though.

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

I put escort flyers in the hotel bibles usually at proverbs 7:10 or kings 3:16. oh i'm agnostic btw hehehe

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I'd assume you were

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

If we don't bring this to the front page, follow usersub dwellers, we will have failed our divine duty.

10 years ago | Likes 216 Dislikes 11

You put way too much effort into the whole usersub circlejerk.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 4

Don't worry it's cumming.

10 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

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10 years ago (deleted Sep 16, 2017 4:06 AM) | Likes 0 Dislikes 0

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10 years ago (deleted Oct 21, 2024 11:42 PM) | Likes 0 Dislikes 0

You sir have earned my upvote

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1