justboozer
3139
67
10
I just hit the fucking weird news JACKPOT.
Jul 19, 2017 11:26 PM
justboozer
3139
67
10
I just hit the fucking weird news JACKPOT.
thatswhatshesaidtho
KillingTheJoke12
http://bingewatchpodcast.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/juice.jpg
1mshadowbanned
Well where is he supposed to masterbate? Is there like a special masbatorium for that?
preparetosigh
*That's* the reason they'll deny parole? Well whatever works, I guess
Aerisot
Masturbating has been shown to relieve stress and increase happiness, why would we punish this?
rakusjo
Guessing you dont know who OJ is...
ShartyParty
Well if there's one thing he's known for it's for gettin off
burtmacklinyousonofabish
well thats stupid
Fawlawl
So in his parole trial he'll wrap his hand around the penis and say " it doesn't fit. must acquit "
loganlobo
I guess they prefer he does it in the shower and get raped
HellsHegemony
Too bad you can't get a conjugal visit from his wife.
D2tm
justboozer
incenderylemons
Because he was rubbing his cock, his room still has a lock
SaraFourImgur
Because of his sperm, he'll be serving a longer term
incenderylemons
Because he jacked off, the parole officers backed off
cuddlez
Choked the chicken and stayed in prison
ShartyParty
Because he did the strokey, he must stay in the pokey
TheMightyKibbless
RHYMES
RagnarLothcock
Stroked the dink, stuck in the clink
BoomIgotyourwalletBoomIgotyourphilliestickets
Squeezes some skin, now can't leave the bin.
incenderylemons
I love all of you
TheMightyKibbless
Played the skin flute, so he has to keep taking it in the chute. (Because prison is notorious for anal-rape and other such things).
wykesy
Is one of those headlines that jam two unrelated things together or is Masturbation really grounds for parole denial?
justboozer
Evidently, getting caught jerking off is a disciplinary offense. It could delay his parole hearing.
wykesy
That explains why jail is such a hostile environment.