pyromaniac042
157929
3252
109
Mar 18, 2017 9:01 PM
pyromaniac042
157929
3252
109
iloveronjeremy
First sergeant has been keeping the crayons to himself.. asshole
metalfoto
Perfectly detailed
boobcat
Marines are what you get if you spend Billions of dollars millitarizing Generations of pure Redneck.
hardestreign365
meskarune
The army doesn't go in until the marines make sure its safe. Army has bases, tanks and air support, marines have each other.
WhatTheRockWasCookin
SecretaryNotSure
I miss his videos.
ThatOneLostSock
Now lets compare to the Royal Marines (`-`)
supraman2turbo
Kills enemy, drinks tea
justforthisonecomment
Should I keep a supply of crayons for these marines? I'm afraid they're sol if they try to save me now...
ospreymec
You forgot where we searched the house for crayons and left after being unable to locate our next meal.
CorneliusCornwall
Where the fuck has the phrase "get amphibious" been all my life. I'm crying from laughter
FranticLies
Air force here can't comment too busy sitting in a chair
Narkareth
Get Amphibious sounds like the last two thirds of Darkwing Kermit's catch phrase
HailToUltron
The Army treats their people like fucking dogs. At least the Marines treats you like a Marine.
BentwanJameson
Since when? My experience getting told to fill a Hesco barrier with an E-tool says otherwise.
watdefuqBoi
If the last six years has taught me anything it's that this post is accurate to the t.
USMCKCCO
Oo-fucking-Rah Devil Dogs! Life takers and heart breakers. Tellers of tales. Defenders of freedom and takers of chaste. Semper Fidelis
everyusernameiwantistakenisalreadytakenasausername
Ooh-Rah.
NoGaijin
Don't forget we'll draw dicks on everything. Idk why...we just do.
PikachusThug
Wagner <3's Cock
NowDoThatVoodooThatYouDo
My ex-Marine buddy once joked that Marines are best described as Homer Simpson with the crayon crammed up his nose.
kongfuchicken
Used to play world of warcraft with a marine. You forgot about the part where they'll swear for 5 minutes straight without repeating a word.
theno1yeti
Yes, most people who play online games with me just wait for someone to raise my ire to hear the tirade I will end up going on.
abigmoosenamedjerb
Former Marine here. The forgot the part about taking your wife.
CRNoel
Abrams mechanic in the marine corps, can confirm. Also, I love the blue flavored crayons.
5po0ky
"Where do you keep your Pledge? "
awesomeojen
We need more lemon pledge
PikachusThug
Or the quick shine
cogs
Navy here. Wait for the Marines to call me when they're done playing and want to come home. I'll be in my pit.
Lizaderp
Right? Just playing spades and waiting until someone needs a band-aid.
cogs
Or cribbage. Hated dominoes, all that noisy slapping of the pieces.
Marjoskan
In the Airforce we'll just call the house in question from our desk, make small talk, and then hang up the phone and take an hour lunch.
StreetsAheadMemeDude
You forgot the drone strike
runnfly
Hour lunch?!...at Staff level I'm taking at least hour and a half, and then back to imgur.
swinglinered
rookie numbers
DJasperProbincruxtheThird
*order room service
skelitor120
And if there is indeed a threat just send a jet
skizzygavs
I'm Air Force, can confirm.
TerriblePokemon
I work with an airforce reservist. Nice kid but any time he tries to talk military I want to squeeze him until his eyes pop out
hardestreign365
Not all air force is created equal. Look up 1T2x1
Marjoskan
Even as active I won't have much to say until I get the opportunity to deploy. My job doesn't get deployed so I'll have to snatch TCN duty.
BeesechurgerProductions
My god, Air Force Reserve. The only thing cushier than that is just not being in the military
Isometimesupvotereposts
WHY DO THEY STILL CALL IR REVILE IF THEY DON'T EVEN PLAY THE DAMN SONG
TerryCrews
Coast guard.... reserves.
Epsilon025
Listen, the coast guard will actively go into hurricanes, for "fun." This is from my grandfather who was Navy, though, so respect exists.
BraveStrawberry
*Chairforce. ;)
ChomskyWouldnt
you only take hour long lunches? Shit man, step up your game
Marjoskan
Hour and a half most days really, but there isn't really a time frame for them either
FranksRumham
Those are rookie numbers, you need to pump those numbers up.
ChomskyWouldnt
bonus points if you have a cocktail with lunch
Firesealb99
That's the comment I was looking for.
Whowatchesthewampas
Former Marine, can confirm. Also I call dibs on the red crayons
introxx
I thought "once a marine, always a marine."
MaurnaElegYiar
Gimme the black ones, they taste like licorice!
TakeMeToYourTrashCan
As long as I get the peach crayons. They taste like strawberries.
MaurnaElegYiar
The brown ones always tasted like peaches to me
hurrayforboobies
The purple ones don't taste like grape...(biden)
MaurnaElegYiar
Nah they were rasberry flavored
Whowatchesthewampas
HEATHEN!
MaurnaElegYiar
Someone has to take one for the team!
Whowatchesthewampas
When you're right, you're right. You are no Blue Falcon.
MaurnaElegYiar
Remember my name, for my victory will haunt your dreams!
whycantweallsmokeupandbehappy
Steven is that you. (Corporal Clown)
romanaclef
Is that you John Wayne? If this me? (Private Joker)
Lizaderp
No one ever likes the yellow ones.
theno1yeti
Fuck you, they taste like bananas. Former crayon eater also.
Rivalyn
They don't actually taste like cherries, you know that? That's what they tell you to make themselves feel better about letting you do it.
dex2775
They taste like strawberries and cancer!
ilikefoodmorethanpeople
where does the love for crayons come?where does the love for crayons come from?
BigBadBillyBoy
They like picking the wax out of their teeth later.
Whowatchesthewampas
From the sweet, sweet love between Chesty Puller and Opha May Johnson
PaladinAus
Because like most mentally challenged children, marines love eating crayons. It's also the only writing implement they are qualified to use.
BigBadBillyBoy
Qualified? They'd be issued finger paint if it didn't get all over the decks when the Navy took them places.
jarheadED
If they have the 64 crayon box with the built in sharpener. A corpsman will be treating a lacerated dick.
thatmodeltankbuilder
BentwanJameson
They'll just give him some motrin and a 24 hour light duty chit.
SkylorForscythe
What REALLY makes this comment is your username.
Whowatchesthewampas
Drink water, change your socks, and take some Motrin
arednecksquirel
Fuck you they're the best ones
zigzagler
He already called dibs. You can't go against that.
SuckItBlue
And we all know about the "no takebacks" accord!
Whowatchesthewampas
So zesty, so tangy
BentwanJameson
That's only if you put the jalapeño cheese spread on it.
Negnarholf
Don't be me. I ate 9 of those things back to back once. I've still not gotten it out of my system years later.
BentwanJameson
Just imagine trying to pass a couple days worth of MREs in a Port-a-Pottie that was just sprayed out in the Iraqi summer sun. Not fun.
AnEvilGenius
Retired Army - This is accurate except for the stack of AAR comments that the command team will ignore anyway.
Sheepyhead
No it says marines, not pirates.
Nostradamuswaswrong
Not even kidding, I just found an old AAR binder from years ago, covered in dust. We're still doing the same shit, with the same problems.
AnEvilGenius
We had a dining-in one year with a skit criticising AARs. The actor playing 1SG argued back as part of the skit:
AnEvilGenius
"You're problems are irrelevant! [The Commander's] word is law!" The room became very quiet as we all realized it was no longer satire.
ComputerAntiPope
I was PA in an infantry unit & had to do the AAR during deployment training. Had to constantly tell them not to "kill" the media. :/
pyromaniac042
Thank you for your service, I'm an Army ROTC Cadet. Do you have any tips for once I get to my unit when I commission?
ImNotIronMan
Don't say shit like "we're gonna CRUSH THIS GUYS!!!" before training exercises.
dpidcoe
The best managers are the ones who spend all their time intercepting BS from higher up so their underlings can spend time doing their jobs.
iamtheangriestboy
Lower enlisted here, don't befriend your lower enlisted guys. A lot will be your age, but it makes it hard to be the bad guy later on.
Mikeiller
Realize there's a difference between how you're supposed to do things and how things actually get done
teklanis
Everyone says listen to NCOs, as though LTs shouldn't have opinions. Own your position and your platoon. Set and drive for reasonable goals.
DarkLight619
Listen to your NCOs and don't pretend to know more than them just because you have a degree. Don't task soldiers, it undermines the NCO
oncemoreuntothebreach
Current LT here, listen to your NCOs. Most have at least 5 years of actually doing their job, so heed them. At the same time beware bullshit
TerriblePokemon
Understand that everyone hates you and for the love of god listen to your top
Chrichelle
Just understand you are the shit filter between your commander and your platoon, you are the one that has to take the blame for failure.
kinghupahjoop
listen to your senior NCOs.
Capn
I concur. An LT is only as good as his NCOs.
TheL2D
Please listen you your NCOs.
Ungodlylongusernamefornogoodreasoninparticular
Listen to people, itll get you far. If youre being commisioned as an ensign (im navy, so im using my ranks) youre better off in the long 1/2
Ungodlylongusernamefornogoodreasoninparticular
Run listening to your NCOs and some of your e4 and even e3. Sometimes they know better ways than you, just due to experience. Good luck sir!
Nostradamuswaswrong
Show up to your unit ready, you should already have your own box of grid squares, but make sure they issue your chem lite recharging kit.
ChthonicHiro
Bonus points if you ask one of your staff sergeants for a pricky six on your first day in.
Nostradamuswaswrong
Might need a form ID ten-Tango to requisition one of them though.
pyromaniac042
Will they tell me where the Humvee ignition keys are as well?
Nostradamuswaswrong
Motor pool usually has those for you to sign out, I'm sure if you ask nicely they'll take good care of you.
WheresMyHearingAid
GIVE YPUR E4S MORE LEAVE. MUCH MORE. LIKE A LOT MORE.
spankythedog
E4 Mafia
UrKungFuNoGood
3rd generation Marine grunt. Can confirm.
YutteHermsgervordenbrotborda
This post makes it seem like the marines have a lot less red tape they have to deal with. Is that true?
UrKungFuNoGood
Doubtful. The Corps recently ran out a stellar grunt for pissing on enemy corpses. Peace time was even worse. Blue Falcon E4s everywhere
willtroll4nudes
You stop becoming stellar the moment you defile a corpse. Since when is committing war crimes considered "red tape"?
UrKungFuNoGood
Let's just say "Semper Fi" is just a recruiting slogan outside because anyone with real rank will toss you under a bus to save their career
YutteHermsgervordenbrotborda
Would you say the army or marines treat their guys better and give them more leeway overall? Sorry for the probably ignorant questions
UrKungFuNoGood
I was never in the Army so I couldn't say. :cheers: