BarryShitpeas
255957
9826
110
May 12, 2014 10:03 AM
BarryShitpeas
255957
9826
110
kuura
WHY CAN'T THE TEXT BE CURVED IN EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE? I'M HAVING ISSUES.
kazmosis
I can't get over the fact that "Dont be a twat" is not curved like the banner. More so than the missing apostrophe.
mellowdrama
DON'T BE A TWAT
onetee
What kind of fucking wizardry are you using to get phone signal on the tube?!
lucifervalentine
women can be twats too
everynameiwantisgone
I was waiting for the british versions of Queensland Rails' etiquette posters to come here.
UncleBuster
Trying to not puke super hungover on a NYC subway was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
Osomatic
I have had this experience as well. The only difference is that it was in LA.
YoutubeCommenter
I like John, I find his papers all the time and I read them.
soukmania
To be fair with Steve, if he gets up, he's gonna rub his raging erection all over that grandma's face once she's sitting. Doomed either way.
cheesygorga
You mean Peter...
minusthebert
I call it a win/win
GreatPhotoshop
I could believe Boris allowing these.
SpaghettiCunt
.. The font in the ribbon is unaligned in the first three! Sacrilege!
MrPessimistic
God damn Steve. What kind of name is that anyway. Steve.
ebillightbulb
http://imgur.com/1BTBB3W
fuzzy93
TIL only men are pricks when it comes to public transport.
SurfKitty
McBess art?
scottneilsonconcepts
Yeah! The real ads are nice lil poems that he hand wrote https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4fi8dJjhaI8
Ninjacait
definitely looks like it. i'm surprised no one else has commented about it. he's awesome
SurfKitty
right? so totally awesome
suddenlyrelevant
As a regular London transport user, the last person that complained about my suitcase on the tube at rushhour got my suitcase on their foot.
Jumpinjackieflash
People complain? I've actually never seen *anyone* complain in any tube or train, anywhere in England.
suddenlyrelevant
& the tube at rush hour is every man/woman/handbag for themselves. I have pushed people off before because they were crushing the door area.
suddenlyrelevant
Unsure if you're being sarcastic. We are a nation of moaners.
Swinee
Australia did it first, and we did it better.
valanthos
You want a fight mate?
Swinee
YE RIGHTO MATE I'LL GLASS YA! 'STRAYAAAAAA
koopaparatroopa
These work incredibly well when spoken in a calm, deadpan British accent.
TheGooey
"Do a sick?" That is the most adorable way to refer to someone violently evacuating partially digested food. The UK sounds magical.
Luxuria90
It really is.
briafly27
Is your name Beth? I think I know you..
TheGooey
My name is not Beth, sadly.
briafly27
Oops. Nevermind.. I think you'd like my friend Beth.
TheGooey
Awesome, well I hope you find Beth soon. Imgur is dark and full of terrors.
briafly27
Twas Beth that showed me the way. I thought I'd found her again... For just a moment..
PrfctDrk
"You prick. Don't be a twat"
catfacemcgee
Hahaha this campaign backfired so hard in Australia
Lyrian
As someone who is the first to get on the train when it starts the hour long commute. Screw you find your own seat. This one's mine.
everyonelovessprinkles
As someone who did the same working in London, have my upvote.
BoinkedYou
Woman want equal rights. Not a problem. Keep on standing.
barrackobarner
This is the artist for those interested. http://mcbess.com
abske
Concept? Queensland rail etiquette?
MathiasGodin
His music is also great to look into.
havoksdream
Upvoted for awareness. Love his work.
Brunettesnotfighterjets
ahah, I figured it was his work. Dude does some awesome work.
toast4tots
I love this man
NoOtherExplanationIsPossible
Train etiquette. Super simple stuff.
[deleted]
[deleted]
paper24
He's referencing these. http://imgur.com/ADWik ... I like them better. You might too!
ThanksSir
That's racist. Super racist.
WeCanAllPhoneHomeTogether
iunderstoodthatreference.gif
jacopopeterman
theyre funnier than these twat ones...
Pizaz
Ive never understod the phone thing. No one thinks about it if the other person is there, but a phone!! Oh no!(???)
iamireland
Psychologically proven to be grating to listeners.
carefulplanning
at least with a phone you just have to put up with one dull idiot broadcasting a shit conversation.
AsAGayJewishDemocratWithGoogleFiber
It's because the brain can't ignore mysteries. We can tune out both sides of a convo but if one is missing we want to fill in the pieces.
pifac3
Phones are more distracting because listeners have to infer what the other half of the conversation is. Lots of studies done on this effect.
Pizaz
Very interesting, did not know that!
pifac3
An important part of understanding conversation is guessing what they will say from context, which is removed in a one-sided conversation.
Zalophus
...That's a shitty reason. It might explain why it never bothered me, as I don't listen in to other peoples conversations OR phone calls.
pifac3
it's not a conscious response to begin with, it's part of being social animals!
Zalophus
Eh, I can see it being annoying just for the volume factor, but that depends how loud it is. Otherwise, conscious or not, suck it up.
anomaly23
I think it has to do with the volume at which people speak on the phone. Loud conversations are annoying, on the phone or in person.
meowneko
I can't speak for everyone, but I find phone conversations are more often really loud because some people treat it as the person they're (1)
meowneko
talking to is on the opposite end of the freaking train. (2)
JasonD
Just curious, what is Sam supposed to do with his backpack? Put it on the floor where it can trip people?
wickedjayc
If he likes his backpack so much, he can hold it in the air. Won't be in anyone's way.
unapologetic05
find a good spot where it can't hit someone in the face. Super simple stuff.
TyffiBoo
If I have a big bag I can easily place it in front of me where is doesn't trip people. Super simple stuff.
faiora
I usually set my bag on the floor between my feet. That keeps it upright and out of everyone's way.
YouAreNotABeautifulAndUniqueSnowflake
I have to go through London on the tube with a large suitcase, large backpack, and my laptop bag in a few days. Sorry Londoners ):
randomwordsthatmightmeansomething
I keep mine at my feet if it's at all crowded. Less likely to get it up in someone's space that way. Sitting down is nice but not necessary.
IJustWantMyGodDamnEggs
My name is Sam. And yes, i do have an oversized backpack.
Goingbacktostrange
Yes it goes on the floor, but either against the wall or you stand with it between your legs so it doesn't take up any room
chickenwingking
Ah, that makes sense.
Dutcher
Honestly, Sams poster would made more sense if he placed his beloved backbuddy on the chair next to him.
meowneko
Look out for people behind him when he turns around. Take it off and put it on the floor when possible.
JasonD
Honestly, reading the replies, I think the best approach is for Sam to politely ask someone for a seat and then place it on his lap.
opad
That would not be well regarded on any subway I take. Generally 'I brought a bunch of crap' is not a trump card for a seat.
Mithi
In front, where your feet are occupying the space anyways. Also prevents pick-pockets to rummage through your rucksack unnoticed.
Washdaytomorrow
As long as you don't look like you might be Arab, yes. Otherwise the London police might shoot you 6 times and claim you were suspicious.
Thehaff
Was wondering the very same thing. (apologies if you were hoping for a useful reply.)
HommeDeBois
The usual etiquette calls for holding it low and in front of you, or setting it up on your feet. More spacial awareness of what it's doing.
JasonD
This is the most popular answer and I upvoted too, but it does have its downsides as well. aka pelvic ram. Ideally Sam would have a seat.
opad
people's legs are smaller then their butts. There is more room down there. Generally.
JasonD
if they skip leg day, yes
GreatPhotoshop
I could believe Boris allowing these.
Paranoidq
I could believe Boris writing these...
IAmSiegmeyerofCatarina
I want Boris to be in these with his flappy hair going "flubaflubafluba"
GreatPhotoshop
Isn't that what happens in my interviews?
OrangeCarrot
Boris?
Vedar
I heard he is invincible...
Gokule
You heard correct.
[deleted]
[deleted]
Ohhhlookaunicorneatingasamurai
Boris!! http://faceplantreview.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/mibboris.jpg
MrsCanadian
Bahahahaha... I don't know... Just because of him being crazy... I like him :P
DestinyAndChicken
Only every single poster would be about Boris. Don't be a twat Boris. Nobody love you Boris. Shut up Boris
GreatPhotoshop
Everyone loves Boris.
Gokule
I want Boris to allow these.
GreatPhotoshop
Boris probably drew them, they're very Boris.
busdriverdan
What's a Boris?
AthleticLemon
Boris the Animal
thisusernameintentionallyleftblank
Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson. Mayor of London, and a teflon politician. Obfuscates stupidity, but sharp minded. Cyclist. Crazy hairdo.
GreatPhotoshop
Boris Johnson, major of London.
busdriverdan
Thanks.
gnomierose
He probably posted this to get support
jesusisherelookbusy
"Great supine, protoplasmic, invertebrate jellies!" Boris Johnson MP.
[deleted]
[deleted]
NihilTruth
Everyone knows Boris as Boris.
GreatPhotoshop
Not my mayor, I'm not from London. But everyone is, hes a lovable idiot.
ian9outof10
Well, he is king of the dicks.
GreatPhotoshop
He's cool.
ian9outof10
No he's not, he's a massive fucking prick.
GreatPhotoshop
Why?
ian9outof10
One example, the new routemaster. It costs far too much and offers no benefit. A vanity project that wastes millions.
maisiebee
"wants to do a sick"
MistakenGenetials
Had to re-read it 12 times........still doesn't sound right
jasonthemcclain
Yeah. You know you're British when ...
RosesAreRedMyBedIsGreenIWantYouInItIfYouKnowWhatIMean
I thought American English was the crazy version?
[deleted]
[deleted]
aprilillana
I didn't do an lol until I read yours.
[deleted]
[deleted]
NINJACHICKEN007
I missed that until I saw this.
JabbaTheSwampBandit
wants to do a sickie
ExarToon
I also had no idea "tube" was a thing
Rjdiioo
Also, "I did a shit." Damn British.
wolfpreist
Dont be a twat
JQuentinEvermann
*dick
LotWizard
I could honestly see this becoming popular phrasing in the states.
BuckMelanoma
You prick.
Twistednala
no body else noticed they're all guys?
lordsmish
I suppose it's because we are the dominant species they wouldn't put a woman on this poster because they are fragile and might do a cry. /s
futuremonkey
Then he'll look a state.
JohnVaddic19
Which state? Montana?
Dooood
The prat.
PurelyCoincidental
Twaddle!
Dooood
Indubitably.
ThatStickyFeelingJustBeforeYouStartSweating
That was the line that got me!
bestestfester
Right
tractorharvester
Left
pickinganameistoomuchpressure
i want to do a pee
thisiskissel
I want to do a masturbate
FlatPlutoSociety
Dear GOD, that is British.
SpicedNipples
No it's not.
wheresthebaby
I think they'd say he'll be sick. Or he chunder not do a sick.
snowy129
He'll be sick, or he'll puke, just like Americans say it. But I have heard Brits say don't step in the sick, or puddle of sick.
legalese
Chunder, definitely. Or a TC - tactical chunder :P
wheresthebaby
Oh cringe. Haha
SeymourAsses
A friend of mine, after a night of drinking announced to the group "Ladies and Gentlemen, I do apologise, however I must splurty burty".
FlatPlutoSociety
That could either mean he was going to vomit, or publicly masturbate.
hetnkik
I think it means both at the same time.
FlatPlutoSociety
Now THAT is my kind of party.
ihateprettymucheveryoneonimgur
Nice assumption under the guise of actual knowledge. No one in the UK says "do a sick", I've never heard it in my 16 years of being here.
lordsmish
Well i'm going to say it loads now.
theaddicted
Nah, "get sick" is I guess but nobody says "do a sick"
ihateprettymucheveryoneonimgur
Nice assumption under the guise of actual knowledge. No one in the UK says "do a sick", I've never heard it in my 16 years of being here.
tractorharvester
Is it? I don't think anyone I've ever met has spoken like that
graythirteen
Upvoting you guys back because you shouldn't be downvoted for knowing your own dialects just cuz it doesn't match the joke.
KingGoose
Bless you, sir.
crashingrobot
As a British person: No it's not. It's just terrible grammar.
breakalime
I'm pretty sure it's something Mark Corrigan would say on Peep Show, and he is practically a paragon of Britishness.
manolith
It's not how we talk but it is the sort of thing someone would say as a joke here in the U of K
lordsmish
United of kingdom sounds fucking retarded
VEpsilon
Thank you, I'm British and questioned "do a sick"
MafLoic
I remember see Michael McIntyre saying "I got sick in my mouth" or something like that. Meaning he threw up. Thought people said that lol
imgurianitarian
As a Brit, I would do a wee. Not a sick. Not on the tube obviously. That's a sick. I mean. That's sick. Damn.
BroboxylicAcid
It's a Yiddish thing if anything. Informally, an attributive adjective can to act as a noun and co-occur with an indefinite article.
bitt3rsweet
wat
TheNamesTalcJamesTalcSpecialAntiCakedayAgent
Those words sound how their teeth look... crooked and one of them is from the "spares" bin.
SeymourAsses
If we are obeying mindless stereotypes, I think the American just fired shots, how did you pick up the gun with those fat fingers of yours?
TheNamesTalcJamesTalcSpecialAntiCakedayAgent
Easy. Get a bigger gun.
SeymourAsses
Or alternatively get a huge selection of weaponry and distribute it between the children and mentally ill. Fancy a cup of tea by the way?
ImSoHungryICouldEatACoupleTacosOrABurgerOrSomethingIdk
As an American:
IamMelonLordeYaYaYa
Why is it that fat american jokes are tolerated and circlejerked daily, but imgur assumes the brits can't handle it back?
VEpsilon
Personally I refrain from talking about stereotypes which aren't true in general, but that doesn't mean I can't take a joke lol
ihateprettymucheveryoneonimgur
because british dental hygiene is almost the best in the world, higher than the USA. & USA is second to only mexico in fatties.
IamMelonLordeYaYaYa
And? It was still just a fun little jab based on a well-known stereotype.
SpicedNipples
Because it's mostly americans making both of the jokes
TheNamesTalcJamesTalcSpecialAntiCakedayAgent
Because Americans are mean... and fat...
ihateprettymucheveryoneonimgur
God, you really have something against Brits don't you. lol...
TheNamesTalcJamesTalcSpecialAntiCakedayAgent
I have nothing against Brits, but sometimes a joke has to be made. Comedy doesn't discriminate.
ihateprettymucheveryoneonimgur
#comedygold