T3ddles
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First post, amidoinitrite? I enjoyed them so I thought maybe someone else would too.
Textuality
"This is what people call devil worship?" the old lady said, surprised. "Back when we did it, we'd sacrifice at least one virgin per song."
jsparker43
What little girl should play Halo?
HerrBisch
I was not ready for this much cringe.
ZebraVectorBravo
The McDonalds one........yikes.
watsoncumsquickly
Can we talk about Nina the nugget bitch for a minute?
Metalgearslade
I hadn't read the title yet and I was thinking how mch bullshit all of this was. Well played.
Awesometp
Y ppl lie doe
dirtjur
Same with your penis
Calcifiera
barnwolf
Eating McD's chicken nuggets and making fun of OTHERS for eating cardboard? ... oh the irony.
inmyhumbleo
I hate all of these
Dvargar
Umm...clearly you've mistitled this, because these are all from the internet, and nobody lies on the internet.
hadadrumstickandmybrainisstillstuck
A handsome man who calls himself "The Cleaning Lady"
heyguysimtom
"Ageist" is a thing?
LawFiveGuy
Hey, don't be so quick to judge. I can verify two of them because they are about me. I'm the classroom lesbian (#11) and guy at urinal (#12)
DarthFutuza
I see you break many conventional stereotypes. Good work Mr. President.
bustrpoindextr
I feel like a couple of these might be based on half truths. But the rest definitely, definitely never happened
TysoniusMaximusThePatronSaintofOffBrandBreakfastCereals
I am downright certain that in the nugget girls mind that those two "skinny sluts" actually envied her
SteveCraft
e.g. maybe the store clerk gave her an odd look buying led zepplin but didn't say anything.
chardlz
They just got worse and worse and less and less believable...
GreaterDog
I was hoping #3 would be the Loop Zoop story https://imgur.com/oshcVo8
avegancannibal
Honestly, a lot of these could be in a cringe compilation.
kcalcifer
I love dumps. Even if it is a dump of lies.
Vectorman2
Phantom poos are the absolute worst. Bladder: "Hey buddy, you have to shit now.....haha JUST KIDDING JACKASS! IT WAS JUST GAS!!!"
NeverMyReligion
I liked all but one... I'm not down with body shaming. The women who choose to workout and not eat fast food have feelings too.
Piornet
BingleyBingleyBeep
Perfectly captured my reaction. Good work!
tempuslynn
But I really really want the girl who broke the muggers arm with a frog umbrella one to be true. So badly, even though I know it's not.
RyukR
I am pretty sure it's nearly impossible to break bone with a simple umbrella. Like maybe if she was overhand slamming it down but... I doubt
everever
...well, I tripped over a shoe once and broke my ankle, so.
Textuality
I could probably break someone's arm with my old umbrella, if it was in its little carrying case. Sucker was solid. :)
revcleo
or someone so poor they have low bone density
NotQuiteThere
Oh! Oh! Like they have some kind of terrible addiction or HIV which causes liver failure and general shutting down of the body. Possibly.
revcleo
I was thinking just a really shitty diet and not enough sunlight
NotQuiteThere
I wish for the days my brain did not go straight to disaease and the terrible wasting of a person's body.
astrocreep166
You follow the cringe channel too @OP?
T3ddles
Yess! They're so great I had to share it heh
StTriniansHeadBoy
#3 is the best. You'd have to be the most cynical person in the world not to believe that it's 100% true...
therealpopkiller
Girls who want to eat chicken nuggets will forever be healthier than girls who eat chicken nuggets
manwhoclaimstobedoctorbutisnt
I was more offended by her calling 20 chicken nuggets from McDonald's a delicious meal. The audacity.
JustAnotherRandomCommenter
i know, it needs fries and a large milkshake to be a meal.
thedreamcrusher
Title is accurate.
Kelenius
The one about the girl with the Halo sounds pretty realistic IMO, just some smart thinking. The rest, on the other hand...
McBook
http://imgur.com/r/thathappened
Blastergv9
I could see a couple of these actually happening
Faloopsinarb
I didn't read the title, and I was just about to make a comment about how none of this ever happened...
thedreamcrusher
I appreciate your username. I was starting to think I was the only person who felt that way.
Faloopsinarb
Darkspire
Seriously. Saw someone use the words "Black supremacist" unironically earlier about BLM. Can't fix stupid.
HonestToGosh
TIL Bill Gates has access to everyone's social security number
sclev
"I just paid this kid's student loans off but can't for the life of me find his phone number. Becky, call every James in Oregon."
DoctorWatchamacallit
yep. People love to forget tiny details like paying off someone else's student loans would require identity theft
pinecone
Maybe, maybe not. My student loan is technically just a bank account where anybody could transfer money to. However, if I have not told 1/2
pinecone
the number for them, then yes they would need some kind of identity theft to gain the account number. However, I would think that Gates 2/3
pinecone
could for example arrange check or something delivered to the bank or employed. 3/3
TheManWithNoNameZappBrannigan
Accurate response is accurate.
pinecone
*employer.
pinecone
Or, most probably arranged matters with his underlings to arrange the actual payment method, thus "Bill Gates just paid" would rather be 1/2
sclev
"I just paid this kid's student loans off but can't for the life of me find his phone number. Becky, call every James in Oregon."
FIREexclamationmarkFIREexclamationmark
I always imagine the writers of these kind of posts reliving embarassing scenes and then thinking, yes this is what I SHOULD have done
aeomis09
Like that episode of Seinfeld - the jerk factory called and ran out of you!
FIREexclamationmarkFIREexclamationmark
Yes!!
ionfuckwitchu
The fact that people actually thought this bullshit was believable or entertaining makes my blood boil.
hadadrumstickandmybrainisstillstuck
Answer: 2 tumbler accounts. One for BS story. one for reply. Notice how there is hardly ever more than 1 reply?
BlueBomber05
When no one is challenging you, you have to make up stories about opressors to protect your precious victimhood
Tofugrass
Read the title bb
Vectorman2
I think he was more referring to the actual posts themselves that were responded to with 'OMG cutest story EVAR' and shit like that
ThatCouldPossiblyBeMyFetish
Halo 4 is rated 18+, just putting that out there
cntdn
Rated 16 in UK though.
TheyCallMeMrPigeonCuzImJustSoCoo
Well kids need to learn to kill early so they can survive the hunger games if Trump wins the election
SteveCraft
I thought the falling mob was plausible, unlikely, but plausible. The rest are, of course, total BS.
ifyourwifiisdownjustgoogleit
Who the fuck squirted lemon juice up your fanny. Instead of life giving your parents lemons they got you. Ffs
kkanne20
damn dude calm down
sputtymutt
I can't handle the indescribable rage that the led Zeppelin story brings me...
ThatJerkYouKnow
Couldn't keep going after that, lol, the bullshit was too intense. I think I'm glad I missed the rest of it.
Danowar1990
And the self-righteous "ageist" bullshit comment after it
JohannesFit
Somebody working at a store like that would be HAPPY that a girl that age likes Led Zeppelin. They just do it for attention
Vectorman2
'Oh, someone fell, I'll fall over too so they wont feel bad.' Who the fuck actually thinks this much less believes that others would too?
chipotleismylife
idk i fell in the snow and my friend fell down next to me to make me feel better. but he's my friend so i guess that's the difference
Fal1enKing
Films aren't real but I'm guessing you still watch them, right? It passes the time and some are touching or funny. Don't be so sour.
musicbeyondwords
Nah, films are boring and formulaic, have been for years. It's more about the flashy effects than the story itself now.
rosiethereaver
Sure, but films are entertaining, and aren't just some dumbass humblebragging to his facebook friends to make his life seem less pathetic.
HonestToGosh
Same. I was legitimately pissed off, especially at the McNuggets one.
glitchead
I dunno, I'm losing weight, can be considered skinny now, and I still ogle food I can't eat. I just have self-fucking-control.
HerrBisch
Well now that one is an honest mistake, the stupid whale mistook the looks of disgust on the normal women's faces as envy.
McBook
Because how could you possibly not envy that independent, healthy landwhale?
Thackattack001
If anything: gym rats were looking at this person thinking another fat person being gluttonous. Side note: McNuggets come in 20? Really?
TheChosenOne77
The nuggets have for a long time
AccountCreatedToUpdogVotes
Technically, at least at my local McDonalds', you can still order a 20 but you get a 10. Also, you can order a 40 but get 4 10s.
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Ctr1F8
THEY COME IN 50?!
McBook
Not in Germany
Thackattack001
What? No way... I haven't been to McDonald's in over 20 years.
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Ctr1F8
The young girl buying led zepplin is where I went "people believe this shit?"
AccountCreatedToUpdogVotes
Exactly. If the guy behind the counter was into Zeppelin he would have said "cool choice" or something. It isn't a hipster band.
Ctr1F8
Yes. If I knew a kid into zepplin, I'd give him or her a high five... not a scolding