iwasdoingfinelurking
145248
2319
64
Dion't ride so close to a barge while riding a jet ski
Apr 17, 2018 7:42 PM
iwasdoingfinelurking
145248
2319
64
Dimmikk
ThailandExpress
jitterpuss
As a scuba diver this gives me nightmares
2fligh2high
spaceymonkey
OneGreatFap
TondaTonda
"If you don't want to fall off the cliff, don't see how far over you can lean"
Glitterbrisket
syntaxxor
Venturi effect on that ass
CrouchingSniperHiddenCamper
Ships generate a huge positive pressure zone at the bow and a negative pressure zone along the sides. This causes an effect called...
CrouchingSniperHiddenCamper
"Bank Suction" which can cause the ship to get pulled into the banks when transiting a channel. This is also how the "Texas Chicken"....
CrouchingSniperHiddenCamper
Is used to get ships up and down the Houston Ship Channel which is extremely narrow.
010010000110100100100001
ChasePoppins
Was looking for you
merpderphurpburp
Me watching this gif
JetDealer
Was expecting to see a cloud of mblood as he gets caught in the helix
ichoosethering
m'blood *tips fedora*
TheHorseShesElbowDeepIn
https://www.amazon.com/dp/0870334336/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awdb_t1_KgO1AbC4XVFFK
TheUltimateChimera
The reviews are great
Laimbrane
What a time to be alive.
ShatteredF1re
Safety first... oh wait the safety feature almost killed him.
Xoniac
No, it didn't really affect anything I think those come loose easily, but if he didnt hold that jetski he woulda been sucked under.
cre8majic
If he wanted to touch the ship, he should've gone on the other side of it, and used his non-safety tethered hand
Varderal
ausernamethatencapsultatesme
My crew literally uses the sign language symbol for “flying asshole” when reporting these machines on bow watch.
EMTsaidwhat
Darwin runner up!
qwijybo
Is Whale Wars starting up again?
HungryPumpkn
I bet the bubblehead believes in a giant spaghetti monster too.
ImJustSoFckingSickOfThisBllsht
Darwin awards exist for shit like this.
MegaDudeMan
Tue dude didnt even attempt to turn away
datphone777365
grabboid10
Omg I was leaning to the right the whole time I watched that video to try and make him move away...didn’t work
clickclickwhirrr
Me toooooooooo
CryptFist
For sale 1 jet ski small brown stain on seat $1,200.00 obo
ehsteve12
Do stupid things, face stupid consequences
MLeague
Fuck everything about this
TheRealHelmsman
Ahhh.. Ex APL Coral.. was on there.. Whatta maroon.. Hope the ship got the Coast Guard on that guy..
CalvinMcFly
Could....could that really suck him under???
onthe6ball
think of the amount of water those props are sucking in.
IShouldBeStudyingRightNowInsteadOfBrowsingImgur
More pushing away. Water from around just rushed to fill the void infront of them.
BallsackHippo
Yes, he's alive only because he was holding his jetski. Otherwise he would have been sucked under the ship and minced by the propeller.
0fficerDoofy
Do you have a video for proof?
theonlyrexmitchell
Physics. The water pressure pushed out the rear of the props is gathered from all around the rest of the ship (and below).
theonlyrexmitchell
See above
SamuthNBS
Yes, this one
RacecarRoadcar
You didn't watch Speed 2: Cruise control?
divebombdan
LoL ...Did anyone?
redpillpuffin
thank god he spent his money on a go pro instead of common sense
imanatheistdebateme
Is it common knowledge that there is a suction effect around ships? I had no idea.
YouSufferWithCognitiveDissonance
Water is only buoyant only if there's no air in it
daugbret
He also cut the ignition by pulling on the killswitch tether. Jet skis don't work that great with the engine off.
idonthaveagoodnameinmind
think of a fan, sucks air from one side, blows it out the other.... no add water and make it a HUGE fan.
imanatheistdebateme
I would have thought the ship would displace water, pushing it outwards from the hull. Is it the propellers that you are referring to?
entropyk
Displacement raises water level, motion would push out, but is overcome by vortex of propellers, relative to speed, I'm guessing..?
IWouldDoThings
I thought so.
Indactil
Hasn't anyone seen Titanic or was it Pearl Harbor?
purplesheep91
It may not be. But it's common knowledge not to get in front of or that close to something that big.
MajikMessiah
Was that the adrenaline rush he was looking for?
PoppinLochNessHopster
You know afterwards he went "WOO!!" and told all his buddies about the time he kissed a ship.
Ein0r
"Wouldnt it be cool if i could touch such a big freighter with my bare hands out on the sea while it drives? Fuck yeah!!"
Retromorphic
This is not the adrenaline rush you are looking for.
JamesAHarrod
“Prometheus school of running away”
Castriff
Prometheus School of Running Towards Things
RandomVoiceFromTheInternet
Prometheus Escapism Academy. Motto: "Semper Recta Tardus"; or translated to English "Always go Straight and Slow".
Cryptic350
Prometheus and Bob
Surisuule
Cthulily
notthatdrunk
Fuck that! I think I just found a new worse fear of dying
InnovativePurgatory
RacecarRoadcar
Holy shit
FartedWhileMakingUpName
"WHY YOU HITTIN YOURSELF" - Train
PoppinLochNessHopster
God damn what a badass
hiyesthisissatan
Is there sauce on this one?
noReallyIamPrincessBob
See above from Fragiledonkey
FragileDonkey
https://youtu.be/MnZSJBP6j8E
InnovativePurgatory
Apparently i saw slowed version of this but that train was MOVING!
noReallyIamPrincessBob
Wow, just...wow... I wonder if he's still into selfies, or if he learned his lesson?
InnovativePurgatory
grapevine rumor says this might be him on his next attempt...maybe?
Feronin
He ded.
RyanK252
InnovativePurgatory
Boot to the FACE!
fryedman
Is that what that was? I approve
divebombdan
Last time I saw this, that engineers boot saved him from getting wrecked on some metal.
fryedman
*Hits idiot with boot cause its fun*. *Saves idiot from dying.* "Ooops.... Oh I mean that was on purpose, yes that's it"
notthatdrunk
Did I... did I just watch someone die?
Retromorphic
No, he only got hit by a train.
Laimbrane
Apparently he survived with serious injuries.
gr8whtd0pe
Video says he lived. I don’t know how.
Jupman
Oh Long Johnson
BLow30z
Not that I think you deserve to die for a lapse of judgement, but you damn near deserved it on that one. Shouldve never been that close.
Maitrify
Nah. Survival of the fittest works for a reason. We should stop saving stupid fuckers like this
APXONTAS
THIS IS NOT A LAPSE OF JUDGEMENT. It didn't take a second for both the decision AND the outcome. This fucktard had to try and stay close.
ScienceIsntAboutWhyItsAboutWhyNot
That may be so. But think of the captain of that ship. He would have been forced to kill another person without even knowing it
BLow30z
Yep. All because some jackass wanted a video to show off to his friends. I hate people.
noReallyIamPrincessBob
The captain wouldn't have been forced to kill anyone. If you drive into a large ship, it's on you.
Retromorphic
Another? is our captain somehow already a mass murderer? Lol
RelativeVelocity
You know too much...
redpillpuffin
i don't think hed care at all, has literally 0% ability to do anything other than blow horn, and clearly they see the ship already so meh
WookieWookieWookie
I've read stories from train conductors that have hit people. Knowing you couldn't change it doesn't stop people from feeling awful.
reux
Brother in law works for BNSF. It's really hard on them when some moron gets killed by a train. There's not much they can do.
bobcock
Last witness killed.
Turkishtime04
1000 bounty removed from Haafingar.
fewe
"Another person"
Boriua
My thoughts exactly. This captain has some explaining to do
relicen
ScienceIsntAboutWhyItsAboutWhyNot
Damn. Why do I always write my comments without reading them even once?
Blewmeister
How else do you become captain?
MoistMilk
Why the fuck would you be driving that close to it?? You're asking for something bad to happen
morphis
Clicks and up-votes
ProfaneSanction
Just some good old water driving
quattroformaggix4
Did you not read? *Jet Skier*
[deleted]
[deleted]
Armouredfalcon
No, the cable is a killswitch there so if he falls off he yanks it out and cuts the ignitoon so it doesnt drive off without him
InquisitorLexaeloftheOrdoHereticus
Ahh, that makes more sense.
liana77
Agreed. There is no fix for stupid.
BewareTheIceSpiders
Per my lifeguard experience, sitting on a jetski instantly crushes anyone's IQ.
GuardsmanMiku
he failed the prometheus school of running away from things
DoggoPicsMakeMeHungry
Cruising for a Darwin award
universalcode
Runner-up for the Darwin Award.
bambulina
My sentiments exactly. Man, that's some powerful stupid...
joeyjojosharknado
I live at the beach and I see a lot of jet-skiers doing really stupid things. When some people jump on a jetski their brain seems to shrink.
dramaticpaws
Instant asshole - just add water.
IHuggedaCorgiToday
oh their brain was already that size
JackScagnetti1
Can confirm i drove my jetski too close to the fishing docks and got hooked in the leg by a fishing line. :(
Armouredfalcon
Yup. Its also usually illegal. 5 knots within 200m of shore. While we're at it, 5 knots within 50m of another vessel. Idiots.
iwanttobebobdylan
GO FAST
PoppinLochNessHopster
They're over water and feel safer.
joeyjojosharknado
Other's safety seems to be less of a concern too.I've seen plenty roaring around at 40kts in a 6kt zone, a few feet away from swimming kids.
ObliqueRay
"Water's soft, what could possibly go wrong"
Kyorbi
The water is not soft, I repeat, the water is *very hard*.
DoingItWrongSince1980
Very hard, eh? But what is it's shape?
Kyorbi
Shapely.
Thefriendeveryoneisaskingfor
Picking up my Amazon package
EmoryToss17
This man barely eluded Darwin's icy grasp. The human race is probably worse off for it.
Fleaofpain
yolobrolo
You must be better than him.
EmoryToss17
I'm better than most, and he doesn't appear to be exceptional.
DoggoPicsMakeMeHungry
Come on. We've all done incredibly stupid things that almost get us killed. Amiright? Lol... :(
canadianreserve
No.
baconsmellsreallygood
Big ships create a lot of wake. He was getting closer so he can ride the waves the ship made. Still fucking stupid
tomyironmane
And if they don't believe you, they can ask the Navy.
tomyironmane
https://media.npr.org/assets/img/2017/06/18/destroyer-3-50809691318d32fe6f2d33facfa98b950c7bb69d-s1600-c85.jpg
noReallyIamPrincessBob
WTF happened there?
tomyironmane
A container ship happened.
noReallyIamPrincessBob
Looks like it's listing to starboard.
kcool951
Is it because of what he was wearing?
PurityOfEssence
No, Venturi effect
58d8fee2
No. Watch this water move toward the ship. Some of it will end up under the ship: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91XOFH7I7cQ
DoggoPicsMakeMeHungry
#himtoo
NokenMonk
Idiot was trying to touch it. That's how he yanked out the ignition cutoff.
thebestimgurian
i touch the shippy
StrayBullet
This all makes so much more sense now. Thank you. +1
SubzeroAK
He was trying to touch the butt...
theguyinthebackoftheambulance
ocdmn
I mean, who wouldn't want to tap that booty? it's toa die for.
LogicalUpset
Boaty?
ghettosoak
This is like 70% of my phobias in one gif
RightTurnClyde
Stop jet skiing near large water vessels then. You're lucky to see what happens here..
ematic
I legit typed out almost the exact same comment, and then saw yours. I feel you...
Peetza
Just add some fire and a plane crash and I’m covered.
albers1345
The heart rate app on my watch asked if I’m ok, my heart rate doubled over like 5 seconds lol
Begotten
The submerged part of big ships = NO. Huge submerged objects in the ocean = NOOOOOOOOOOOO
foxyfaice
I need to know what that is though...
YouThinkThatsBad
That gives me anxiety. When canoeing in a small lake, I went by a tree trunk, the rest disappearing into darkness. Had a mini panic attack
Begotten
WHAT. ARE. THEY. DOING?????????
yak3ftw
Attempting to increase MARSEC
omglandshark
Maybe DON'T check out https://www.reddit.com/r/thalassophobia then.
DidYouKnowThatCashewsComeFromAFruit
You know how this works. You know darn well I clicked that link
omglandshark
https://www.depend.com/en-us/
DidYouKnowThatCashewsComeFromAFruit