sendnoodlespls
16042
297
7
Apr 15, 2026 3:35 AM
sendnoodlespls
16042
297
7
quade
"It's like people just don't want to work anymore"
IntelligentLake
Comment only visible for Imgur Premium members.
TheMurderousCricket
That's THE resume for newspaper and video game publisher companies.
[deleted]
[deleted]
ActualLazyEnhancedXenos
[me] "mom can we have memes?"
[mom] "we have memes at home"
*the memes at home*
AWarningToOthers
I'm broke, give me a job before i wind up on the street.
hobostew
I’ve seriously contemplated using this exact response to the hundreds.. yes hundreds of applications that require this field.
Rogahar
'Why do you want to work here?'
'I enjoy food, warmth and a roof over my head, and you are willing to give me money in exchange for my time and labor so that I can continue to afford those things.'
FukcTedCruz
Threaten them by being homeless on only their property. They will be forced to hire you...
Whitebeardthepirate
that or they chuckle, call security and ensure you "accidentally" fall down 10 flights of stairs hitting your neck repeatedly
stayingalive4life
Zioxyl
https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1dnV0djBsbWJoanN6czRudHZ4MnFqYjlvNWpvdjg2OG5kOTRlNmhjdCZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/t1bhftT5XDOnoHmlNK/200w.webp
Redshadow09
at least they didn't increase the hours to work and stayed consistent with 40. though the poop breaks scare me a little
WhyDontYouMakeMe
It doesn't include pee breaks, poop breaks are time investments
TrumpRapesAndEatsChildren0002
For some, poop breaks are the only productive time of the day...
InitHello
They still poop thrice daily, but on the premium plan they only leave their desk for one of the poops. That is the only possible interpretation, there are no others.
cytherians
"Poop" break should be "Bio" break, IMHO. Gonna have to pee a lot more than poop!
mondeca
I'm reading this a pee breaks don't count, given that they take so little time.
pgdave
Yeah, but "overtime" doesn't apply to salaried employees (who make above a certain amount) so that 40 hours isn't really relevant. On the other hand, at nearly 200k a year, that's kind of expected.
Zalm
Overtime absolutely does apply to salaried employees. The thing is, most salary contracts account for a general amount of overtime pay normally. Not paying overtime is illegal, and you can't sign a contract that lets a company ignore the law anymore than you can sign a contract to kill someone and get away with it.
"It's in the contract!"
Still illegal
pgdave
Please look up "exempt" vs "non-exempt".
An exempt employee is a worker classified under the Fair Labor Standards Act (FLSA) as ineligible for minimum wage and overtime pay, typically because they are paid on a salary basis and perform specific executive, administrative, professional, outside sales, or computer-related duties
SavageDrums
I've been salary+ in the past.
Kimsgrim
If I seen this as an employer it's going straight into the trash and I'd blackball their name.
Niagaran
With grammar like "if I seen", it's a good thing you're not in business.
shadowhunter100
It is a... somewhat dark humorous take on how everything seems to work for the consumer and the company/employer but never the employee. "Only pay for what you need". And I see the lack of empathy is strong in you.
zechor
Then we all have to hope that you are not the kind of employer whose job adverts this post is making fun of.