BrassBonanza
94230
2394
68
May 6, 2021 3:36 AM
BrassBonanza
94230
2394
68
Nilnna
My high school history teacher was a marine and he constantly called the navy a taxi service.
WokeGhettoSpiritualist
Says the guys who keep having to go to daddy navy for more money because they keep spending it all.
Krishire
Rest of the World: What are those two hobos fighting over?
Mewmus
why does the navy have their names stenciled on their butts? so the marines know who they're fucking
ThunderStrike2021
YEAH! THE MENS DEPARTMENT! I’m still tired of hearing that line.
Decoyape11
Weird how you say that with a mouthful of wax
gluttonygreedpridewrathslothlustenvy
The prefix root Mar- means "sea". A mariner is a seafarer. It's only in weird American context that marine lost its direct link to the sea.
userNamelessOne
Yes, you can sail the seven seas
lddiaz
"I like you Navy boys fine. Every time we go fight somewhere, you fellas always give us a lift."
ShipOfFate
“You navy boys always give us a ride”
HosniMubark
The men’s dept.
Problemwoodchuck
victalany
How dare you.
Mewmus
ok, i'm at work laughing like an idiot. +1
madeejit
"No man will be a sailor who has contrivance enough to get himself into a jail; for being in a ship is being in a jail, with...
madeejit
... the chance of being drowned. A man in jail has more room, better food, and frequently, better company. "
Drakhma
ColdRice
You think crayons are bad? You should see what a Squid will put in his mouth.
TreasonousCheeto
Other sailors I presume?
hashomerachianochi
I think the word you're looking for is seamen
Carl99
Yes, Submariners to be specific.
embodymentofgattaca
Serega81
Yut, now take me to my destination seaman.
DFunk187
evastria
My friend doesn't understand this and is too afraid to ask
somnif
Marines are like the Navy's land-going forces. The navy transports them from point A to point B, where they get off the boat and hit stuff
KommissarLyus
Assholefullofelbows
Navy revenge* queue up in any P-way, wait for marines to line up, leave. They'll stand their for days.
youbetchamom
Stand their what? What will they stand? Finish your thought, man. We're waiting.
MaintenanceGuyHere
Queue up? You're not American which means *gasps* you can make fake lines for Marines internationally
Diablito69
We will wait "there" until you're 15 minutes late. Then we're bored and looking for 3 things. Gym, chowhall and any thing left unsecured!
dmfk138
Works every damn time. Just stand in the mess line and they assume it's time to eat.
KillerTofu615
"They'll stand their for days" You might want to try that sentence again before this Marine corrects you.
TyRo012
Gotta love when an insult is completely obliterated by the self evidence of stupidity found in incorrect grammar.
redtwostandingby
Marine stand. Navy go. No follow.
UneventfulLover
They're on their way over to the burn ward already.
CureForHomoSapiens
OP,
Marine0311
I endorse this meme.
Cheesecar
Marines are a department of the Navy, the Men's department
Mcfrans
What about Seal teams ?
ProChoiceBaby
Marines are just seamen who aren't smart.
LuminoZero
As a Navy vet, most seaman aren't that smart either.
thescottishfox
Wanna make a Marine quake with fear? Put him on submarine.
DorkJedi
Sumbarines. 100 seamen go down, 50 couples come up.
BustCheeks
I was once walking behind a Marine that was with his buddy. He stopped at a puddle, put his boot in it and said, "Hey look.I'm a submarine."
MrHappySmiles
LOL
JustAnotherVictimOfAmbientMorality
Is that like a lesser version? Like, submarine, marine, supramarine, ultramarine?
UmamiMama
Take away their crayons..
GMontag451
This is the absolute truth. Seen it with marines, army rangers, and those fuckin seals.
shopCSNtv
7 ton, c-130 with hanging nets to sit on and a shit ton of gear that will crush you in an instant, tanks, ships. All cool. No subs!
AndreaAllheart
Um I'm not a marine and I'd quake with fear on a submarine too
KommissarLyus
Nah, remind them they're due for shots and make the corpsman they keep picking on administer it.
Narfwak
I mean, you could just open a pack of Charms in their general vicinity.
AmyBernadettePenny
I would have liked to have seen Montana.
hsimah
Literally wanted to see Montana from when I saw the movie as a kid. Made it there for Christmas 2019 and it was so beautiful. Worth it.
DonnaNobleInTheLibrary
Movie? Montana is not a sub?
LazyJones1
Spoiler warning - https://youtu.be/BJESLxEd0Tk
LuminoZero
One of the Russian officers in Hunt for Red October wants to defect to America, move to Montana and own a truck.
TreasonousCheeto
Reference from The Hunt for Red October.
ShipOfFate
No papers?
Problemwoodchuck
No papers.
PeterParkerPickedAPeckOfPickledPeppers
State to state.
weirdsmith
I think I will need two wives.
BillHaleyandHisBANNEDComments2
On?
thescottishfox
Yes. Missed a word due to inebriation/not going over what I just typed.
NotNotDeadpool
Chow is supposed to be good at least
thescottishfox
depends on the day... and how long you've been out punching holes in the water.
RanchoCucamonga
Apparently one of the most common things Navy recruiters hear is: "I'll do anything but go on a submarine"
GadenKerensky
Submarines are the hardest to spot, but among the most prioritised targets... and the least survivable in an emergency or disaster.
DeathBecomesHerAndSheBecomesDeath
2nd common thing: i don't wanna go nuke (sometimes in conjunction with I don't wanna glow)
ISnoggedMadamedePompadour
Cool thing is they burn giant candle/crayons to make oxygen on the submarine. Life sustaining crayons = Marines wet dream
TheVampireDante
Must be the same ones they put in the marine's medkits. "Here chew on this, it'll help you breathe."
LupusLilium
I have a totally rational issue with submarines, being that on average you're going to be submerged below safe depth for swimming to safety
LupusLilium
even if you somehow survived cracking the sub open at depth to even think of trying to swim to safety.
nvrgnagivuup
Lol, I said I'm not going on a boat. Then me get free crayons from Marine Crops
unkiereamus
I said that,but only because I'm 6'8".
LuminoZero
It's easy for you, everybody else has to eat your shoulder 7 times a day.
unkiereamus
Never been on one, but I always rather assumed that my head and various pieces of metal would constantly want to share the same places.
LuminoZero
Nah, tall people get used to ducking everywhere. It's the people of average height that get comfortable and then SURPRISE!
GoatanamoBay
What's the opposite of a submarine? A dommarine.
RadioSilenceDW
Domaero perhaps?
GoatanamoBay
Sorry, I don't listen to hip hop
NaughtButOne
horseheadmaniac
DangerousNoodle
Bro, that was dumb as fuck.
GoatanamoBay
WarlockWithNoPatron
*dom as fuck
thepronouncer
Well of course it was. They had to make sure the Marines would get it.
OneFinalEffortIsAllThatRemains
https://i.imgur.com/UpbAeiR
Slixxerman
Wouldn't anyone with common sense have a base fear about an underwater vehicle springing a leak?
DrKriegersClone
Supposedly if there's a pinhole leak, the stream can be so forceful but tiny that it can cut flesh and bone without even being seen. 1/
DrKriegersClone
2/ Just walk through the wrong place and you're mortality wounded before noticing anything is wrong.
Junktrunkjunkie
One of my brothers is a plumber on board a submarine. Making sure that doesn't happen is basically his whole job.
ADeadlySpoon
He better be good at it.
ADeadlySpoon
For real tho, he's a badass. That's gotta take some balls to do.
LuminoZero
Nah, man, it's WAY more concerning when you realize you can't open a specific locker at 500+ feet because the hull has compressed.
magicronin
I was way more scared of fires or toxic gas leaks than I was of flooding. Saw a bunch of fires. Gas nearly got me once. Never had flooding
consoleMASTERrace
Water in people tank bad. It's a respected fear, but doesn't happen enough to be constant.
Notforhire
The fact it happens is enough for me
Notforhire
I'll take the floaty one
erikna
Hmmm do i detect a jive turkey viewer on my sonar?
consoleMASTERrace
No shower tech here!
Mepharias
Oh shit. He was in my memory as the sub man. I’d been wanting to find him. Thanks for this.
SirDistic
*laughs in Air Force*
thegoodowl
Something something stationary bike comment
CallieOpal
Army: Hey, someone told the Lyft driver a funny joke.
treed240z
The Army actually has more aircraft than any other branch of the military. They lyft themselves.
CallieOpal
Helicopters, maybe drones, true. I haven't seen an army soldier piloting a C-130 yet.
treed240z
Helicopters are still aircraft! (yes I am aware they don't fly planes).
Problemwoodchuck
I believe you meant, laughs via Zoom in Air Force
insanitywolfismysaneside
Don't be an idiot....we use Teams
MrHappySmiles
From an air conditioned tent or hotel accommodation*
NyQuilDaydream
My buddy's first posting is London and they gave him a fully furnished condo with modern utilities aka touch screen fridge.... Bastard
GinTea
okay, seriously, what a d**k! (signed someone who's too familiar with the lunatic London rent prices/housing)
nvrgnagivuup
While still collecting hazard pay because a Marine was on the call
KillerTofu615
God I hate you. Fuckers got hazard pay staying in Marine barracks... we live there you cunts.
SirDistic
Yes but Chinese crayons could contain lead. That's a hazard.
Drakhma
EddyWantok
But, you kinda explained right there why the allowance was paid.
ButtsMcGee86
We also get hardship duty if the accomodations are below AF standards (which are pretty high).
RatFromADifferentSewer
Where the fuck was that. I lived in asbestos filled dorms for the first couple of years.
thisisjunk
0/10. Driver yelled at me. No crayons were provided for mid-trip snack.
fibbertitgibbet
Military but not a marine I sense?
Medievaljedi
SnailMail1
The windows had absolutely no flavor
thegrammargestapo
icantevenWot
STOP OVERUSING THIS REFERENCE SHIT. EVERYBODY GETS IT. ITS ONE OF THE TOP COMMENTS.
thegrammargestapo
Yeah, I don't know if you know this, but Cap wasn't responding to an obscure reference here. This was specifically for an easy reference.
thegrammargestapo
He was excited that he finally understood a reference that was made, which only the literal space alien didn't get.
thegrammargestapo
Also...
EuphCat
I don't get it and at this point I'm afraid to ask.png
Dumfk
Me either.... we can be clueless together
SingingandDancingInTheRain