aplasticbagmadeofcheese
175799
3381
156
Apr 29, 2017 6:06 PM
aplasticbagmadeofcheese
175799
3381
156
theAluminumFalcon
TohruRokuno
When I was in the hospital the phone in my room rang and I answered it "Hello, Papa John's." On the other end was a confused receptionist.
ExecutorHideo
#15 Fish-Eye tits...
ClassicSean
Planet America strikes again!
rukkaru
no way the FBI thing is true, I really don't know why but I just simply don't think that would be possible
WePutBirdsOnThings
#1
v
ParsleySage
#4 "What grades are you getting in your classes?" "How much did you make last year?"
nfseskimo
compare the clothes on the luke and leia photo. clearly shopped
TheLimpinBiscuit
SneakySnooker
#12 What is this comma usage?
j84johnson
Thank you.
aplasticbagmadeofcheese
You're welcome
TunkkisOfFinland
Can someone explain #19 to me.
jesusisherelookbusy
#3 *Looks for 4K channels* FUUUUUUUUUUU....
JustAnotherUsername6
TheCattyDee
The Luke and Leia one looks like someone just stopped their faces into the old photo. All the creases are the same in their clothes..
tinybabycat
Was wondering if anyone else noticed
Skrai
I was checking for this comment before I pointed it out. They are definitely the same picture with new faces.
JadedWombat
A urine pun made someone laugh? I don't believe it.
Flyndaran
Some people love piss poor jokes.
Zasep
Really? We're justifying procrastination?
Zasep
WHAT HAVE WE BECOME?!
joeyjojosharknado
That's sure to work out well for them in the long run...
metalfoto
ouch
monsteratethepilot
Kevin's abortion clinic, you make em', we scrape em'.
TeeMee123
101 elmos lmfao
totoro432
Luke and Leia was straight photoshop and that sorta ticks me off
TheLark
Absolutely, you can tell by the positioning of Mark Hamill's fingers, never would be so perfectly repositioned. So much shop.
FutureHylian
Adam Shilman DOES look like William Shakespear with the exception of almost everything.
xlavenderrain
#8 tho..
YourNeighbourlyCanadian
When you really get down to it a unhinged ferris wheel rolling towards the sea really could be a windmill full of corpses....
Lunavalve
Best dump ever. Also, unrelated, anyone know where I can "adopt" some Elmos...asking for a friend.
MurielB
I immediately thought of Plain Awful when I saw #1
sunfried
Eh... the Director of the FBI doesn't work at the Pentagon. They're about a 15 minute drive apart, or 90 minutes in DC traffic.
crabbydotca
I visited DC for a day on a road trip and accidentally tried to leave around 5pm. Spent 90 MINUTES on ONE off ramp. Luckily, we had snacks.
mindolluin
SO TRUE! I got stuck for 7 hours in D.C. traffic trying to get to Baltimore with 2 teens and a baby!
WifiBee
Even so, that's not how phones work within companies, you hit the server and it patches you if you can or else you reach the reception..
PitchforkSalesperson
YOU MEAN THEY LIED TO ME?
schrodingersasymmetric12gauge
Actually, the entire DC local government owns their own phone company so you probably can't even do that if they don't want you to.
hillbillyal
You think somebody would do that? Just go on the internet and tell lies?
Nahxela
or five metro delays and trackwork if you want to try public transport
fuckweaselry
as someone's who grew up in DC bc her parents worked for the FAA this is painfully relatable lol
Slapthefatcat
Freaking Metro. "We don't have the budget to fix the Metro." Because they haven't been doing the maintenance they should have.
baseballl2000
I mean, they have way less federal and state funding than they need to do proper maintenance
Flyndaran
Our local bus system gets surprised by winter every damn year. OMG! What's that hard stuff falling from the sky!?!?!?
bohemiancrabcity
And the director of the FBI doesn't answer their own phone.
GimmeGhostBoots
Just about every tumblr story is bs, my dude.
Nuttburger
It's not a website, it's a gender
BigBoyBillClinton
Also pretty sure the FBI director's number would be outside the range that most phone numbers are in so it would be impossible to //
BigBoyBillClinton
// call him accidentally.
bohemiancrabcity
They generally use a closed network phone network. The receptionist will have a Comercial number for outside calls.
BigBoyBillClinton
Ah, okay. That makes sense.
gbhil
The director of the FBI has an office in the Pentagon.
gbhil
Most likely the phone in that office is not connected to an exchange that can be reached from the outside.
LastKindWords
The lady in red is Iris Apfel, legendary fashion icon from New York. Has lived her life as she damn well pleases. Very charming.
RMaybeth
apparently being a fashion icon is much more low-rent then i thought
LastKindWords
Art is subjective. Ms Apfel was the subject of an exhibit at The Metropolitan Museum of Art; hardly low rent.
StarrSmasherr
It's not Yetta from the nanny?
LastKindWords
Too funny - and Yetta was my favorite!
StarrSmasherr
She is honestly grandma goals
PeebRow
a documentary on her and her life is available on Netflix. IRIS. watch it the next time you can't decide what to watch.
LastKindWords
I've seen it and loved it, but I second your recommendation to others who may not have.
Gandynutile
#12 is just a case of people trying to see a quality in their laziness. You know what perfectly goes with perfectionism ? Hard working.
TwoBitFortuneTeller
That's not how I see it. Understanding my own faults and reasoning helps me change them, I've found. Analysis of one's faults 1/2
TwoBitFortuneTeller
isn't bad. Using the results as justification to continue can be.
TheLimpinBiscuit
Was wondering about that. I procrastinate usually just because I don't feel like it or I dread the task itself.
joeyjojosharknado
Yeah, seems like a whole lot of rationalisation and excuses going on there.
Gandynutile
And a bit of Tumblr's "I'm so special and extraordinary"
dhaskjdhawyajhdbsdbgwakjhbdnmcckclkklkl
if its not gift wrap, what is it?
yamigrl
A feminine hygiene pad wrapper!
pogidaga
Thanks! My idiot friend didn't know. I have laryngitis so I couldn't tell him. This helped him a lot.
yamigrl
I'm so glad he has more knowledge now.