swansoniancandidate
519165
9919
296
Jul 29, 2014 1:06 PM
swansoniancandidate
519165
9919
296
elucidatefurther
Thanks, Bill Burr. It's been a while since someone made me feel good about my masturbation habits.
knowhaimsayn
The man just speaks justice.
TF2215
As soon as someone insults you and doesn't bring anything legitimate to the argument. You got it in the bag.
IamNotVeryCreativeSoThisIsMyUsername
Champagne of Victory
PCard
http://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/elvis_champagne.gif
JungleLoveOreOreo
The champagne of victory...so good you can taste it.
Lucky24NA
Billy Red Face!
PCard
*Freckle Face
queenofthehoneyhornets
Actually very funny. But it works the other way around too
Jawesomesauce
So glad me and my bf don't fight like this. It's not a fight! You're not opponents! You're on the same team!
5plus5isSchfiftyFive
This is so accurate, it hurts.
ChipSkylar
I hope we see him on Better Call Saul.
swansoniancandidate
So help me god if we don't ...
GeorgePancakes
He was great in Breaking Bad.
JohnnyDanger
The sauce: http://youtu.be/-BSlqZYtWzQ?t=48m22s and yes you should listen to the full stand up, it's that damn good.
Justalittlecrooked
I've been looking for this. Thank you!
Yummyyummytacoz
Im trusting you! Better be good!
BrotherhoodOfTheTaco
Im gonna watch this later...
Cyvarios
You, good sir, have wasted an hour of my day I will never get back!
SweetZombiJesus
I think it is on Netflix, too. At least in Canada, it is.
chaosundivided
I'm-a comment for later use
2ndbestpseudonym
aww shit that was good, +1
DiglettDigDiglettDigTrioTrioTrio
He just won Comedian of the Year at a Canadian comedy fest, very recent, I know I am missing something obvious though
FeversAndMirrors
Commenting to watch later
KFizzle
Savouring for later
jrau18
Wait, what?
mooseknucklesavage
Subd
PvtWaffles
This is...WAY better than i thought it was...i was half laughing, half questioning...+1
JohnnyDanger
Bill Burr is pretty damn funny and he has like 3 stand up specials. Plus a podcast he does on Mondays, which you can listen to on his site.
BUFFSBABY
tnemmoc
BoringRealTalkGuy
lataa
Boomkitty2954
Thank you! I just laughed for solid hour. I needed that.
JohnnyDanger
Glad I could help, my friend.
Sausageforspeedoflight
Comment
snowtheblizzard
Comment for later
MrPresidentDino
Wild comment passing through.
porchside
commenting for later
ajha
I don't know how you could even keep a SO if THIS is how you deal with each other.
dberubevt
+1 for anything related to Bill Burr
azazyel
Here's BIll Burr taking on Phili http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3jMhoGUiIkk
JohnnyDanger
Classic!
itsmellslikefish
I WAS AT THAT SHOW!! The O&A Traveling Virus Tour at the Tweeter Center in Camden NJ
azazyel
You were a part of history.
dietingcookiemonster
Not only is he hilarious but he is such an honest and sincere person. Listening to his podcast you realize he is a brilliant man.
PCard
http://allthingscomedy.com/channels/2/monday-morning-podcast
BIM4900
Unless your a LADYYYY.
ReverandNick
commenting so that I remember to check out his podcast.
dietingcookiemonster
You must. I am now going back and listening to all the old ones. I must look like a maniac driving because I am crying laughing.
MyLifeisaComplicatedDrinkingGame
brilliance is less memorization, and more being able to see through things, and knowing what you don't know. Bill is all 3.
dietingcookiemonster
Definitely agree with that.
BlinkSpunk
Holy shit that was the funniest. Especially his Gold Digger bit. "He's been in the zone for four decades!"
Iamsonewatthis
Love the MMPC
poopdecktragedy
eh, go fuck yaself!
AssManProctologist
saw him live. had me in tears
swansoniancandidate
Monday morning podcast is my favorite part of tuesdays
HighOnModelPaint
Right?
mysteryroach
Oooh jesus.
StonerVet
Bill is a fucking legend.
SpaceTimeNomad
Rule of arguing: The first one to lose their temper loses the argument.
gettingrealtiredofyourshitmrfrodo
Aw shit, that's me.
GnomeDeGuerre
Unless they are right.
emperorcain
Maybe if your mom wasn't such a fucking slut... HEY! CALM DOWN!
SerialKitten666
I would agree EXCEPT that too many people do inflammatory things just to "win" an argument by making you upset. That's not winning, either.
ChaosLierLen637
Well stated!
ninjagaidensigma
Bingo.
SerialKitten666
Basically, if you can only win via manipulation, you didn't win(likely, neither party was right anyway, most arguments are subjective)
DrClaraOswinOswald
Is... Is this really how other people argue with their SO?
Slamburglar
I hope not. With my bf, whoever raises their voice first, loses. Logical fallacy? You're out. Slammed door? You forfeit. Swearing? Red card.
LonLonRanchDressing
No not really. I never curse when arguing with my (now ex) boyfriends. and I curse a fucking lot. I think it's more respectful that way.
julgran
If they do. Maybe they are not ready for a relationship anyway. Fight... But learn something about yourself while doing it, and move on.
SerialKitten666
When bitches and assholes come together-this is what comes out. Typically, girls don't go psycho and men don't disregard her emotions
mysteryroach
Oh come the fuck on you judgemental twat. Even in a perfect relationship those biblical fights erupt from time to time. Its healthy and fun.
diddlcooter
Married for years; this, while downvoted, is fucking true.
mysteryroach
I'll embrace the downvotes. Old Billy Twinkletoes would probably agree with me, not that I care for his prius-driving opinions.
mysteryroach
The truth is way more fun and less boring than the uneventful feel-good bullshit illusion those wee shites advocate.
RedroverRedrover
Not for everyone. My husband's calm and understanding, he's basically impossible to yell at. And I'm not much of a yeller anyway.
mysteryroach
I'm usually not a yeller, except when some internet retard suggests fighting couples are made of "bitches" and "assholes".
RedroverRedrover
:)
InGoatWeTrust
Bill Burr and Louis CK, while pretending to be dumb, are two of the smartest people I know.
QuadrilateralEnix
Most professional comedians have to be brilliant in order to come up with their material. Smart people are really funny.
seanweinstein
of
bewareofmeg
My favorite Louis CK sketch is the one where he's talking about how he will bang a girl while on her period. Died.
SugarF00t
Did you see Bill Burr in The Heat?
liekifucrievytim
He may not have been educated, but Patrice O'neal seemed to me the smartest of any comedian I've seen
ThatMomentWhenImgurJokesAreOnlyFunnyToImgurians
Bill Burr is the realist guy out there, gives no shits and gives you the truth, which some dont' like
ComeOnAndSlam
Except when he's talking about Vaccination, in which case he's talking bullshit he learned from right-wing media.
flubberfucker
Way to make him sound like the ultimate cliche.
ThatMomentWhenImgurJokesAreOnlyFunnyToImgurians
people willl listen to him and know what I mean
FloodingWaters
no shit, right. Does he also work hard and play harder?
TheMightWorkingDayAndNight
indeed, great comics
TheGlassKing
What about black science guy?
Moan2
black science guy is science smart. these guys are people smart
Moan2
Still hopin for a collab
SingleNiceFedoraWearingClassyGuycautiondonotfriendzone
Idk, I know I will get downvoted, but Louis CK seems to think he's a genius. https://moe219.files.wordpress.com/2013/05/louis-ck-boredom.jpg
SingleNiceFedoraWearingClassyGuycautiondonotfriendzone
Just seems pretentious
idislikecomingupwithuniqueusernames
Well, yeah, but I'm bored.
DownvoteFairies
Louis CK needs to calm it down on the misandry and feminist-pandering. Otherwise he's a freaking laugh riot and a great comedian.
LiarLiarPantsUntier
You know of them - you don't know them :)
LiarLiarPantsUntier
What's with the downvoting by the way? Seems a little excessive to be honest. Not just in my case.
InGoatWeTrust
Maybe I do. You don't know my life!
LiarLiarPantsUntier
Let me correct myself then. I am fairly certain that you know of them and that you don't know them. But I can't say for sure. :)
vadge
How do they pretend to be dumb?
InGoatWeTrust
By stating they're stupid and uneducated in most of their shows?
azghul
At least 50% of Louis C.K.'s act/ tv show revolve around how much of a fat disgusting simpleton he can be, according to himself
itsimpossibletofindausernamethatisnttaken
Have you actually watched/listened to either of them? Both comedians feature self deprecation rather heavily.
vadge
Self-deprecation and outright 'pretending to be dumb' are different things entirely but whatever, on with the downvotes for my question
DrKateStumplebutt
Doug Stanhope is another one.
TheStyg
Don't think he calls himself stupid. Just gives off an aura of "yeah don't listen to me, I'm a crazy asshole," meanwhile making good points.
stonerhippiemutt
You're alright.
InGoatWeTrust
YES.
TheFogComesOnLittleCatFeet
You just nailed the 3rd in my top-3. Thanks. It's nice to know others see the same.
iamireland
A smart man knows himself to be a fool.
loremipsum
Gloss over the religious parts for the gist of my reply http://skdesigns.com/internet/articles/quotes/williamson/our_deepest_fear/
SquirZardAsaur
nice does that mean im smart as shit?
AbrahamLinksys
I read that as "A smart man knows himself to be a foot." I liked that quotation better.....I am not a smart man.
PastaIsLife
I feel like wise is more accurate then smart here
hencethequeef
This is true for arguing with anyone. My favorite is seeing it in political debates. Really? This is how you prove you're fit to run shit?
DarthBrawn
When have you seen someone rub one out in a political debate?
hencethequeef
Well, most of their speech IS pretty masturbatory.
johnvictor
Except most times you are arguing with idiots and we all know about them and their experience in being idiots.
UnspokenX
it's sad 'cuz somehow it WORKS.... when they berate their opponent, and talk about how poor of a leader they are, it makes them look better.
AncientPostNecromancer
The underlying problem is the system has evolved (devolved?) Into this sort of antagonistic poop flinging. It's mostly a show though.
KALADlN
This goes double for internet arguments. Get that trump comment in and let the facts speak for themselves.
Jupeez
You rub one out?
STIKY55
Weren't you going to anyway?
zenfell
you rub one out?
HomWapko
It's the champagne of victory.
TheRealDurdan
yeah its weird seeing politicians do it
Danidv
Why would someone even... You know what, forget it, with Rule 34 around i can't afford to ask.
TheRealDurdan
Now Im thinking about it....damn it
TheRealDurdan
we all have our little querks
xspartanx117x
It's been over a year and I hate to be that guy but it's quirk with an i