UhBell
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Sep 22, 2015 11:29 PM
UhBell
213891
5813
281
RealityIsAnIllusionTheUniverseIsAHologramBuyGoldBYYYYYYYYYYYE
At least she's funny, unlike Family Guy.
JustYourAverageNerd
just to inform you of my situation, its 4am and im listening to the frozen soundtrack
DontGoInTheDogPark
Yeh but doesnt black widow have a Russian version of the super serum? So isnt she just a girl cap?
fairybug
She's not supposed to be a warrior, her specialty is espionage. None of the rest are good at that.
HelpfulMasturbationTips
Clint is just sitting there like, "I have the super power of archery." And hoping the Widow won't say, "The power of guns and killing."
Xeynid
She's just as useful as cap due to being more skill than him, and everyone is powered down so cap is about equal to everyone else.
Xeynid
*skilled. fuck
thereisnowayillrememberthisname
If you idiots would actually read the comics or check Wikipedia...you would understand she is pretty much Captain America Lite. GEEEZ!
NatashaFrickinRomanoff
Not even captain america lite, though not as strong she has the same if not more abilities than he does due to training+genetic enhancement.
SilentHowling
Exactly!
HITG
Can break into FortMeade while being hunted by SHIELD so easily they didn bother to show it in WinterSoldier. Then AoU damsel in distress :|
NatashaFrickinRomanoff
Thats because the Russos understand what an incredible character natasha is. Whedon is a trashbag who cant write female characters for shit.
HITG
YES. <3 so glad they're coming back to write more and he isn't.
InGoatWeTrust
Black Widow is kickass for many reasons. She doesn't have the brute force, but she's the only real intelligence agent on the team...
SilentHowling
She also took a version of the super-serum caption america did. Everyone forgets this.
InGoatWeTrust
That's in some versions of the comics... Was it in the movies though?
NatashaFrickinRomanoff
Its implied in flashbacks in Avengers2. But Whedon can't write female characters so we never know for sure. More is to come with Civil War.
Gaarwaronja
I'm not very well-versed in the universe, but isn't she also really good at manipulating and persuading people?
NatashaFrickinRomanoff
She was also trained from a very young age in the art of espionage, is a master of several different martial arts and a master of weapons.
Gaarwaronja
Haha, hi Natasha Romanoff
NatashaFrickinRomanoff
Hello!
Gaarwaronja
I like how you came here to defend yourself
NatashaFrickinRomanoff
Someone has to do it.
edissick
1) The fact that people here take this srsly it's utterly idiotic. Also, I suppose, the critique it's more about the fact that she was put
edissick
2) there just becasue otherwise Avengers would be a all male squad
Salaryman
The director originally envisioned Wasp as the female member. BUT Ant-Man wasn't in production yet so they scrapped that idea.
NotTheUsernameYouAreLookingFor
Why does Ironman have eyelids?
will242
Original iron man was just a metal faceplate with eye holes it looks like they based it off of that
mcp33pants
there's apparently another Scooby Doo series starting in Oct, and all the character designs look like this 'Family Dad Parody' style ugh
zigzagler
So... Really stiff and almost no animation whatsoever?
mcp33pants
and bizarre eyes (also Seth did work at Hanna Barbera 20 odd years ago so full circle or something)
ourmrswashburne
So, despite the fact that she personally recruited three of those guys, they're interviewing her to be in the Avengers?
IDontSeeEnoughDarkTowerOnImgur
You're right funnies aren't funny unless they're 100% accurate funnies.
ourmrswashburne
Funnies aren't funny when they're a transparent attempt to invalidate a character's intelligence/skills because boobs.
IDontSeeEnoughDarkTowerOnImgur
Oh you're taking the sexism angle, now it makes more sense that you're nitpicking at the joke.
ourmrswashburne
Or, y'know, because if it wasn't even a little bit about that Hawkeye would be in the same boat. But he's not, sooo... Boobs.
IDontSeeEnoughDarkTowerOnImgur
Or Hawkeye has insane skills with a high tech bow which is a lot more impressive to audiences than 'can fight'
VulcanP90
It's just not a funny joke in general. Like it's really not.
IDontSeeEnoughDarkTowerOnImgur
Humor is subjective and this got upvoted thousands of times, so at least some people disagree with you.
Tyrannotron
She's the team's skill monkey, which is useful to any party that already has combat covered.
sigmaecho
Not in the movies she's not.
Tyrannotron
Maybe not in AOU, but I felt her main roles in the Avengers, CA:WS, even IM2 to a lesser extent, very much portrayed her as a skill monkey.
mepscribbles
favourite reply so far
BrokeMyFunnyBone
She also has the super-soldier serum. It's not like she's dead weight in a fight.
Tyrannotron
In what continuity is that? Never heard of it in the 616 or the MCU.
terribleinternetpunsfirstborn
It's an action movie, though. In non-action stuff she's 110% more useful than any of the others, but in action she's the weakest link
igotausernamejusttotellyou
I'm gonna say Hawkeye is the weakest link not her. She uses multiple martial art forms, very well I might add, she has her widow bites (1),
will242
She is perfect for taking down multiple minions while the heavy hitters focus on the boss
malakim
Well, she is an infiltrator. You don't send ironman or thor or the hulk if you want to scout out or infiltrate the enemy.
terribleinternetpunsfirstborn
Yeah like I said, in anything other than action she's more useful than any of them. All we ever see is action, though
igotausernamejusttotellyou
her gun use is pretty on point, she has the flexibility of a gymnast, & she has some superhuman abilities (i.e. super strength). (2).
terribleinternetpunsfirstborn
As I understand it Hawkeye has superhuman sight and possibly hearing, depending where you look. I've never heard of her super strength tho
scrodobaggins
Never heard of the superhuman hearing before? In the main comics, he has severely impaired hearing.
Clitastrophe
I still really want to see her gain actual powers, or a stealth power suit.(Akin to the Stealth suit Mk II in fallout mixed with Iron Man?)
Glumerlink
wtf is the point of hawkeye then?
PowerNeXus
Utility player. He's got an arrow for everything. Bombs? Check. Grappling hook? Check. Computer virus? Check. etc etc
Glumerlink
but literally everything he can do the other avengers are capable of
PowerNeXus
But none of them are capable of all of it together.
Confrontation
Tony. Tony is capable of all of that.
Tyrannotron
Scout- finds enemy weaknesses and terrain advantages to help the team, while skill monkeying as well (to a lesser degree). A ranger in D&D.
Glumerlink
i'd say that's Jarvis's job
Tyrannotron
It's not like there's never any duplication of abilities on a team. Hawkeye's also provides versatility, skill monkey, and range support.
Glumerlink
all of hawkeyes abilities are duplicated in some fashion by other members, but no one can replace The Hulk, Thor, Iron Man, or Cap. America
srsfaceI8C
Exactly. You think Thor is going to make that Bluff check? Not damn likely.
TehGrimReaper
Well, he did trick a giant into thinking he was the goddess of love and beauty. But that was with assists and maybe was more Disguise.
TehGrimReaper
And it was the myths, so not *that* Thor, but whatever.
YoullBePerfectWhenYoureDead
Hawkeye can too. Being a carnie comes with certain talents.
Tyrannotron
Really, Tony's the only other one who'd be any good at a bluff check. Unless we are counting Fury.
TheBoxGh0st
Fury shits nat 20's on bluff like a loaded die.
SometimesISayHistoryStuff
Bluff and Diplomacy he's got. BW has that, plus Sense Motive, Disguise, Escape Artist, Hide, Move Silently, Sleight of Hand, and so on
Tyrannotron
Right, skill monkey.
TheLordLucifersBannedAccount02
Dex Char builds baby.
mrchambers
She could also take a pounding. Who else could take a pounding? ... Put your hand down Hawkeye.
PikachooBacca
Thegif.gif
SilentHowling
She also took a version of the super-serum caption america did. Everyone forgets this.
TwiliPrincess93
...read an avengers doujinshi, can't see them the same again...Hawkeye certainly can take a hell of a pounding
ILogInToUpvote
Cue the hulk+scarlet gif
thatclimbingguy
Please don't
mrchambers
Yes!
littlelum
THE GIF
TheMightyCock
LEMME SMASH
Mobileuserwholikestoberandom
*sigh* http://imgur.com/YQ4fsU5.gif
PantsAreForTheWeek
Ha! There it is.
ILogInToUpvote
You win SFW award of the week.
TheHulkInCarnate
Never seen that version, Fucking beautiful! Made my day less shit
sexysubsandwich
I like this. This is a good post
Ehab1991
pussy
DixonBuhtz
Wanna click so bad but I'm at work
Mobileuserwholikestoberandom
Don't worry, it's the SFW one ;)
ILogInToUpvote
It's safe, I promise.
notsocrazy24
what was the original?
Mobileuserwholikestoberandom
NSFW:
notsocrazy24
I guess I should have specified, I just figured some sarcastic asshole would post it: what was the original gif with the Rock?
Sasarious
Well after reading the recent comics, he gets pounded quite often,
mrchambers
IllShowYee
that comment set the mood for my day. Mood: good and a little sexually frustrated. not a bad start. not a bad start at all
omnigloriousreg
+1 for green text as Hulk
Sheepyhead
Oh yeah the way she absolutely played Loki like a fiddle in the first movie just didn't happen I guess
ElbowDeepinaTinyOctopus
She's an immensely skilled fighter, and even more immensely skilled spy. No one else, besides possibly Hawkeye, is infiltrating shit.
HughLaurie
Pfff. Stark can spy on whomever he wants, from his couch.
malloryarcher
Hulk infiltrated her #thatonegif
KazadAiMenu
Pretty sure good ol tony stark could build a flock of nano spys to do a similar job.
HawasKaPujari
She has people skills for her spy jobs.
ourmrswashburne
Machines could observe and record, not get people to talk.
actuallyMikeTyson
and a canon supersoldier, the same way Steve is
ElbowDeepinaTinyOctopus
Not so much in the MCU (given the costumes and composition of the avengers), though she certainly is in the comics
captainhowel
This. The Winter Soldier showed what her talents were.
TheFinalDoctor
skill and gadgets =/= superpower. In essence she she has exactly the same superpowers as Hawkeye and Ironman(none). (Rogers gets super str)
Jaron58
She is a super spy
jesusisherelookbusy
Sparta322
*Sulk
IdonotknowwhatthehellIamdoinghere
Well, there's this: https://media.giphy.com/media/Ayrwh6w7dazII/giphy.gif
will242
You got to love that even the women are staring at her ass
hitshappens
Yea because who needs people who have awesome skills in subterfuge and infiltration and can still stay safe on a battlefield full of aliens?
dropthebutts
Sub 4 lyfe
[deleted]
[deleted]
TheBlackWindHowls
Don't fuck with Black Widow.
She's *worthy.*
watsisface1
There's also the part where, in situations like the battle of new york people are going to want to go with the nice lady than scary boom man
hitshappens
Yea, and that. Plus, she's the one who closed the portal. Iron man took out the nuke, everyone else fought, but she ended the battle
TheBlackWindHowls
That council is full of goddamn idiots. "Let's nuke New York! That'll end well, right?"
nocturnalrob
Do you think she stayed safe on the battlefield because of her "superpowers" or because it was written that way?
hitshappens
2/2 bullshit and yet I don't see anyone accusing him of violating realism
hitshappens
She doesn't have superpowers, that's the point. She stayed safe because she's a trained infiltrator. Tony Starks science is total 1/2
nocturnalrob
She infiltrated the streets of fucking Manhattan? What a feat!
hitshappens
No, she avoided an alien army to infiltrate the top of Stark tower in order to take out the portal letting aliens in.
SlightlyNormal
Please, realistically, she'd die the first five minutes. Only reason she can stay alive is because they need a token female.
barnwolf
There was plenty of chaos in New York for her to hide in, and she's not a big enough threat to be singled out.
KingKelloggTheWaffleHaggler
And token human bow man. Having them out there really bothered me.
SlightlyNormal
That too, he is freaking useless.
Beverlyhillscopisonrightnow
Talking about realism in a universe where gods fight aliens and rich guys in robot suits travel to other dimensions.
SlightlyNormal
Each universe, no matter how made up it is, has its own set of logical rules it should still follow to keep suspension of disbelief.
Beverlyhillscopisonrightnow
Agreed but those rules are not our rules in this universe. Who's to say she's not an extremely skilled warrior be it mortal?
TheSwedishCryptid
You leave that suspension of disbelief if you think the ironman suit sustain impacts that could crush peoples and leave Tony intact.
SlightlyNormal
Ever heard of helmets? The things supposedly stopping impacts that otherwise can crack your skull open?
StarscreamYouHaveFailedMeForTheLastTime
I think this explains a lot https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pb9l988kqL4
crabiscuit
.
Gokule
Robot chicken always does it better.
truth71
OOOOOOHHHHHHHHH YEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH
JustJoe2047
Lmao!!
captainobvioustits
.
PhilTheFluffiestDogOnTheInternet
ಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_ಠಠ_à²
ThisAwesome
lol this is awesome
Orochidragon24
When i saw this post, i thought of that exact scene too
struuunz
Lmfao
halffullmetalalchemist
The best part is Thor covers his erection when In the Hawkeye bit
catsteel
Commenting for future refetence
pLayingImgurOnHardMode
I signed in just to upvote this glorious piece of work.
Yglwek
Stupid sexy Hawkeye.
saralas
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQ27iS1mkuo
Leftytheperpetuallyperplexed
Leithreas
Deserves it more than Hawkeye.
calyxium
This. Same skillset, but Widow can use modern weaponry.
KingKelloggTheWaffleHaggler
We don't know if he cant though?
calyxium
Okay, actually uses more effective modern weaponry*
KingKelloggTheWaffleHaggler
In stealth bows are actually super useful, quieter than a silenced handgun.
calyxium
But the movie show him doing things you cannot do with a bow, like shooting out windows in very high storey buildings. The glass is so 1/2
SilentHowling
She also took a version of the super-serum caption america did. Everyone forgets this.
zigzagler
She's a secret agent and also has the power of "handgun".
punkybeanster
"Why am I so good at guns?"
beleginwaffle
In England, "handgun" is a super power.
rshackleford
ahhhh bullets, my only weakness
blitherypoop
Really bendy too.
Drogothedestroyerkitty
Hand on my gun if you know what I mean
svon1
so they should hire Agent Smith instead?
DarkDragonTargaryen7
One of her biggest powers is not against enemies but for themselves. She's the only thing standing between them and the Hulk.
DorthLous
Thing is, in the comic, she uses seduction and sex, like, a lot. That's part of her trade skills. But they don't want to show that, so...
watchrinserepeat
Well, they want to but....
RpblcCmmndo38
Well, they sorta show it in the first one when she's tied to the chair.
whatspaulplayingtoday
hulksmashblackwidow.gif
Rovylern
whatspaulplayingtoday
Damn right.
Zephyrias
It's actually just "thegif.gif". People will know exactly what you're talking about.
whatspaulplayingtoday
I know, but I was attempting to inject a bit of humor into it.
Zephyrias
Well, sorry about that, then. I goofed.
BrokeMyFunnyBone
She also has the super-soldier serum.
darmakeJP
*infinite handgun
CountVorkosigan
This is what happens when one party member doesn't get their fair share of the loot.
zigzagler
"What'd you get?" "A +8 Returning Thunder Hammer! You?" "A shield that counts as a ricochet throwing weapon. Hulk?" "HULK GET NEW PANTS."
ayegill
Hulk is clearly running Vow of Poverty
AtalanBeardy
With a very strange monk/barbarian build. Maybe it's a gestalt game?
idiotcube
HULK IS ALREADY PERFECT CHARACTER. HULK NO NEED WIMPY MAGIC EQUIPMENT!
TheLordLucifersBannedAccount02
Hulk + Magic... Sigh. I want another chapter of Wand and SHIELD.
will242
Are you trying to tell me those pants aren't magic?
idiotcube
HULK PANTS KEPT INTACT WITH SHEER TERROR OF HULK!
BottomKek
Handguns are like superpowers where I live, very rare.
aiuta219
Boobs are a super power that some ladies get to have. If you don't believe that, check what kinds of cars 19 year old strippers drive.
Barleyboy
I don't think you are supposed to follow them out to the car. Taboo I believe.
aiuta219
You're right but the rules are different for friends and regulars.
DanteLidge
Well, Scarlett pulls that superpower off quite well
PoppinLochNessHopster
my biggest regret is not being an attractive female so I can be a stripper. :(
Xist3nce
You seem to believe that all strippers are attractive, I'm here to say, no.
DefinitelyAYoshi
You're attractive to someone, probably. I mean, I don't know you, but maybe.
PoppinLochNessHopster
doesn't pay as well :(
DefinitelyAYoshi
:(
tehniceguy
Depends on who that someone is ;)
SippyTurtle
Not with that attitude, it doesn't.
Tikityler
https://dominicarthur.files.wordp">53&h=566">https://dominicarthur.files.wordpress.com/2014/02/908fe-armorclasscastanics.jpg?w=453&h=566 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTGh0EMmMC8
verethy
If I remember correctly Black Widow is the Russian version of Captain America.
RosesAreRedMyBedIsGreenIWantYouInItIfYouKnowWhatIMean
Scaled down dose of the serum.
LaughingWolf
You are correct! Black Widow has the Russian version of the super solider serum -- same as Bucky.
Finaru
Wait what? Really?, has she been like that since the beginning in the comics?
FluffminsterFuller
Nah. Was a mid 2000s retcon.
Finaru
so does she still have powers right now in the comics? Or that was just temporary?
FluffminsterFuller
She is still superpowered. The Russian serum wasn't perfect, but she's had other unnamed biotech improvements when she was in the Red Room.
FreshCaviar
Correct in the comics, but this has never been directly brought up in the films and no scenes seem to suggest that it's true.
aggressivelysouthern
Season 2 of Agent Carter is going to be dealing with the Black Widow program a bit, so maybe it'll come up in there.
NatashaFrickinRomanoff
It's implied that she has enhancements from her flashback in Avengers2, but its never directly stated whether it's super soldier or not.
bigballershotcaller
Now time to insert that one gif:
TheGameDoctor
NO! NOT THAT ONE GIF!
WheezingAppleWannaBe
TOOOO LATE HAAAHAAAHAAA http://imgur.com/YQ4fsU5.gif ................dammut
IusedtobeapervertIstillambutIusedtobetoo
Hulk smash!
wererat2000
Hey at least she knows how to use modern weapons. I'm looking at you, Thor, Hawkweye, Captain America and Hulk.
Mrflufikins
Hulk is weapon
barnwolf
Iron Man uses a maneuvering thruster as his primary weapon, so ya...
will242
They didn't say Iron Man though
HughLaurie
At least Hawkeye's signature trait in unique. He has insane, unmatched bow skills. Romanov is just a kung fu kicking girl with a nice ass.
will242
She is also a spy, a top notch infiltrator, and a decent computer hacker. I only say decent because I'm sure Tony is way better but compared
will242
to the rest of the team her hacking skills are phenomenal
zeoneo1992
hulk is a genetically mutated human via gamma radiation....I feel like it was a pretty high tech process to create a human weapon
Drewscifer
But... Cap used an assault rifle in avengers.....
TheresAGermanWordForThat
Didn't she almost always use her wrist thingies before the Iron Age made firearms ok for the heroes?
docweird
Hulk constantly uses modern weapon - like throwing a tank or kicking a car into someone...
asaggese
Hulk: "Are fists modern weapons ?".
CredibleHulk
Yes.
coolbigandy
No, and Patrick mayonese aren't modern weapons either
wererat2000
[leans to hawkeye] "Say yes... trust me."
RenIsTired
Fists are timeless.
ProfessorWasp
If my lore serves me right, shes also a super soldier like Cap. Shes less strong however due to her serum been a Soviet copy-cat.
guy49
especially Hawkeye
ImTheGoddamnBatwoman
What are you talking about? His bow has an incredible amount of tech. Plus he's a master sniper and pilot.
ApocalypticHorsemen
Dunno does quicksilver count as a modern weapon?
wotemer
Yeah cause any modern weapon is so much more powerful and usefull than mjollnir
NappaTheFriendlyGhost
in thor it's refferenced that hawkeye is pinpoint accurate with most weapons. He just REALLY likes bows.
IAmDrBanner
Excuse you? I know how to use a gun. And computers. I could make a gun with my bare hands. How dare you!
oopsIdroppedmypocketpasta
Hulk can crush a tank with his dick. There isn't a weapon that can keep up with him.
TheWanderer22
I saw a gif that explains why hulk is sorry
BitchButcher
Every Hollywood movie needs at least 1 woman and 1 racial minority. That's the reason.
Freemasonry
Hulk's used modern weapons. He throws tanks for devastating effects. Tanks are modern
behrditz
And lets not forget the dark 90s, with Professor Hulk, where Hulk would wield giant Liefeld esque guns sometimes
will242
Captain America can use guns
Madcowdsis
And you! Stark! Cant even hit a target with a pistol? can you fight without aimbot?
doublekross
Stark made weapons for a living, pretty sure he knew how to fire them.
JPre35
captain america originally used guns..decided against it later
MagikMoose
Cap would know how to use a firearm though. He was in the war. And don't bring up "modern" handguns hardly changed
ireadyouremailz
IronMan kinda is a modern weapon and Hulk sorta used him once...
SweatyYeti420
Hey would you rather wield a handgun or the power of thunder and a kickass hammer like gddamn
Edwinshap
Thordamn*?
McBook
Or a shield that can withstand such powers unscathed?
TalonDudeguy
I could be wrong, but I remember reading something about the Molecules in Cap's Shield bonding tighter due to impact, making 1/2
TalonDudeguy
A stronger shield every time it's hit by something 2/2
McBook
I'm no vibraniumist, all I know is from the movies and imgur
TalonDudeguy
Same here, I can't remember if it was a post where I found it or from a bit of research I did for a paper
Briandavi
Gun's don't care if you're not worthy.
JamesBluntThatSmartassCunt
Thor can survive getting shot. A lot.
BeardKhan
Right. But you are already worthy so. I CALL THE LIGHTENING BITCH
iPretend
That's why I keep running back to them.
techfreak243
Let's not forget the awesome ability to transform into a giant killing monster
stygyan
I admire your ability to turn into a giant raging thing.
techfreak243
whenever im aroused a part of me becomes a giant raging thing
IllCaesar
Hawkeye's actually a decent shot with a firearm. Just better with a bow.
MaladaptedMedic
I don't know of many bullets that when fired can destroy a helicarrier engine... or hack a computer. He don't need no bullets
Clitastrophe
I feel like any of those things could just as easily be bullshitted as bullets as arrows. Meanwhile carrying a LOT more.
Clitastrophe
If you want to more easily swap between ammo types, use a revolver or something for specialties.
barnwolf
I don't know, you can carry more bullets than arrows, and he runs out of arrows a lot.
DrDickinbottom
Why doesn't he carry a gun and a bow?
MaladaptedMedic
http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/596/467/70f.jpg
littlegoblin
is this even funny to anyone?
ZeRootOfAllEvil
Seth McFarlane's Banker.
Vladicasagirl
682 upvotes so I guess there's your answer
CommanderCaribou
famiily guy stopped being funny a while ago
LVL80CatLady
Honestly this show hasn't been funny since season 5
dawnawakensyoursoul
I thought you were referencing imgur instead of the show and I still agreed
littlegoblin
and yet it's still going wit the same shitty jokes, references that only Americans or people from the 80's get.
UhBell
Hence, most of the writers being 80s raised Americans.
LVL80CatLady
I think Meatwad sums it up perfectly
UhBell
They honestly just make whatever they want to make. Not really minding the audience too much, it's just funny to them.
LVL80CatLady
Yeah so does South Park and yet they still somehow come up with hilarious jokes instead of the same old rehashed shit.
UhBell
Oh well. If it's not funny, don't watch it.