LusentSoul
191573
6761
177
"True Story
So I am absolutely unable to tell when people are flirting with me or if they like me probably because of my cripplingly low self-esteem hahaha
So when I was 17 I was at a basketball tournament and this dude and his squad called me over after I finished my game and this dude asked me for my number
and I was all ‘????’ and then I was like ‘oH he’s asking for my basketball number!’ keep in mind we usually have our jersey numbers on the front of our uniforms too but for some reason this one didn’t so I was like ‘oh I’ll turn around and show him’
I didn’t even realize how savage me turning my back on him, showing him my jersey number, and immediately walking away would be
His bros were laughing so hard at him"
"TBH I didn’t even know what I did until I walked back to my mom
who saw everything"
Source: http://southpauz.tumblr.com/post/149050696378/southpauz-true-story-so-i-am-absolutely-unable
imjusthereforthemoneynotyourbs
To be fair if that's how someone asked it is pretty clumsy and a little un-clear.
tommywiseauisfedupwiththisworld
One of the benefits of being ugly is avoiding situations where you are oblivious to being flirted with.
IdAppreciateDickPicsIWould
Failing at social cues and situations: devastating people's chances at romance since forever.
MrsFX
Dude came over to me once an was like "hey" & i stupidly thought he had mistaken me for my pretty an popular friend dani 1/2
MrsFX
Cuss we were same from behind, "dani's in the loo" i said an it took me 3 yrs to realise he was actually trying to flirt with me
thundercactus
omg I wanna use this forever
LusentSoul
I can also see myself using that reaction gif.
lapisknight
Well that's fucking adorkable
tsunami49
InnerUniverse
I find people like that are easier to approach because they don't immediately assume ulterior motives on your part for talking to them.
Meech420
Tbf it's his own fault, he should have actually talked to you. Asking your name would have been a good start. Then he should have asked 1/2
Meech420
for your phone number. 2/2
KeatonTS
Maybe they already semi knew each other. Its not like the girl was complaining.
CaptSteveZissou
I'd be proud if you were my daughter! You were there to play basketball not get dates. Let those girls worry cheer from the bleachers.
AmbiguousGardens
You know what they say. Nobody notices they are being flirted with except for everyone else
LadyNoHeart
I'm the Doritos guy in my group of people
keyblader1985
I'm just so not used to romantic situations that it simply doesn't even OCCUR to me that someone may be flirting. Then later I want to die.
LawFiveGuy
I hope the kid sees this. Its like one of those "angel takes an adult back in time for a do-over" moments, and the boy doesn't become
Junktrunkjunkie
I once did a one man freakshow for a talent show as a bit of a gag. A girl my age came up to talk to me later and said "You know we'd 1/2
Junktrunkjunkie
2/2 make some interesting children together" I'm still not sure if she was flirting or just being strange.
Jayrunn
Or it's possible her mind was just still in the game. Sometimes when you're so focused on doing something it's hard to switch you're mind..
Jayrunn
on a dime like that. Not necessarily her fault missing a cue.
Nivesnow
Met a girl at a game, got her number, went to get nachos, find out my friends told her I was gay and thats why I was so easy to talk to...
spiderqueendemon
I had this problem where guys I liked didn't realize girls could possibly be interested in them. (I have a type.) One day I met someone. 1
spiderqueendemon
I was so afraid he'd assume I wanted to be friends or misunderstand my intentions, so I gave him EVERY PIECE of contact info I had. 2
spiderqueendemon
I took a piece of paper and copied down my dorm phone number, three email addresses, AIM, MSN Messenger, the works. All of it. 3
spiderqueendemon
The very next day, we met up for dinner and went on a date. The next day, dinner and bedroom activities. Lots of. I think he got the point.4
spiderqueendemon
So, three and a half years go by, I graduate from college, and I check his diploma's frame, so as to get a matching one, as we are 5
spiderqueendemon
getting married soon and hey, matching frames look nice. Tucked behind his bachelor's degree is the piece of paper, with the AIM, MSN, etc.6
omgbs
reminds me of the time at six flags some guy said my bathingsuit was cute and i was like thanks and walked away never to be seen again
Doodleyduds
See even trying to play that situation in my head I'd stay to talk bit stumble over simple conversation and then turn bright red.
omgbs
I know that feeling all to well >.<
aayhan
I don't flirt. I embarass myself so that your expectations are extremely low
Vaflukongurin
As a guy with a similar problem of flirt-detection, I've had this happen, most notably in '07, as an IST, at the World Jamboree. (1/5)
Vaflukongurin
We were getting food after work and there was this lovely, hotter than the sun, Swiss girl serving at the station where we got our food(2/5)
Vaflukongurin
She started asking me a lot of annoying personal questions, or so I thought... (I was tired and didn't really want to talk to people) (3/5)
Vaflukongurin
It wasn't until we got to our table that the other guys I was with started asking me what was wrong with me, if I was insane (4/5)
Vaflukongurin
I was a bit confused, asked them what was wrong and they explained that I had just viciously shut down a girl way out of my league (5/5)
Gnomleif76
I've been in similar situations. Let's just say that you're not alone.
SilentScreamsX
A girl at the supermarket once flirted with me the whole time I was queuing and paying for my stuff. Didn't click until I'd put the 1/
SilentScreamsX
food in my car and got in the driver seat. I was about to start the engine and I just stopped and said "you dumb motherfucker" to myself. /2
TheWolfofUsersub
TBH, that guy got fucking rekt
legalisegaymarijuana
Shrekt
furyzeke
"It´s Twelve. Git gud scrub" ... i need a dark souls edition of this.
Thekindofkindlyman
Registered a 10 on the Rekter scale
Steps1000
Self confidence destroyed
JohnnyTitelips
Rekt: The Rektoning.
Kammikatze
Tyrannosaurus Rekt
JormungandrWorldSerpent
Indominus Rekt
aval5
REKTACULAR
Gnomleif76
Ship Rekt
Delcaran
I also am absolutely unable to tell if someone is flirting with me! Probably because it never happens.
Gnomleif76
But -- but ... If you can't tell if someone is flirting with you, how can you know that it never happens?
Delcaran
Because nobody talks to me if it's not work related.
Gnomleif76
So your criteria for flirting is "girl talks to me"? Ruling out eye contact, body language and such?
Delcaran
Dunno, I can't handle eye contact and I don't understand body language... It's awkward for me being with other human beings.
Gnomleif76
Sooo ... You've never noticed if a girl stared at you for longer than normal (which is girlspeak for "I find you interesting/attractive").
kamkor1
as a guy I can never tell when someone is flirting
secretbison
As a guy, it's likely that nobody is ever flirting with you.
assnoodle
As a girl I've expressly told people to enclose their statements in tags on text, and just straight up tell me in person. 1
assnoodle
Because, atleast then, I could react in a way they'd expect. 2/2
UnhelpfulAnswers
your username is confusing <\flirt>
assnoodle
Why is that ;)
UnhelpfulAnswers
Well for starters, is the noodle going in or out of the ass
AwkwardSmiler
Same. I usually figure it out weeks,months, and sometimes, even years later.
jawood2005
It's not cripplingly low self-esteem that makes you miss it. It's a lack of social awareness. Totally different, albeit possibly related.
waldosbabe
I think you're right. My self esteem is great but I'm still oblivious to flirting when it's happening to me
rgzdev
Actually it is a form of low self-esteem. You rule out it so you simply don't look for it. It's a sort of selective unawareness.
Improbabilitydrive42
It can be either. I have social awareness, but no clue when people are interested. I also put no stock in my appearance.
CharmingAndSexyGentlemanStarshipCaptain
Ah youth. When you learn to make mistakes. Let me revise that. Ah life, when you learn to make mistakes until you die
antbody
My dad once asked if I had coffee. I opened the cabinet and showed that yeah, there. Then closed it. He still brings his own coffee...
UnhelpfulAnswers
You dad-joked your own dad?
TheRealNomNom
I feel like I lose points if I go in with a squad behind me, like Im trying to impress them or something.
imjustheretobitchaboutpeople
As a girl, I always felt like their friends were daring them to talk to me or the guy is trying to impress his friends by acting macho, lol
aromaticfable
Sometimes you gotta have your squad nearby just in case there's a hidden strike force of those "protective" chicks and you need interference
conTrollingyou
"WINGMEN, defense formation" *wingmen forms a wall between them to distracts the harpies*
HighSlayerRalton
Well, yeah. She's more likely to remember you as an individual if it's not a gangbang.
micotyro
I took it more as that he just decided to do it now and there.
Big8ooty8iches
if you're just straight up saying "whats your number" you dont have any poitns to lose
GrandNedgus
I was rollerskating about 18 years ago and a gal asked for my number. I said "11 is my favorite because it is a prime number"
trollprozac
Are you now 25?
Kokeria
Op is now 25
BadWolf16
YourMomJokes
if k thnx byeee was a thing back then...
TimTamFlimFlam
Really? 11??? Booooring
thefire259
Bitches love prime numbers
drag555
We had phones 18 years ago ?
shlogan
You serious? Mobile phones are newish, but phones have been a regular thing in houses for over half a century.
AtomicPotato7
Why not 42
VikingTheMad
I once got pet a rollerskating rink. I was a fluffy child.
zma123456
Socially awkward people unite !
Gnomleif76
...separately, in their own homes.
IAmTheBadW01f
127, it's all like, you haven't had a prime since 113, and here comes 127 out of the blue to save you (you get similar stuff in the low 200s
poisoninbothcups
Ooh, and it's 2 to the 7th less 1.
IAmTheBadW01f
That's a common method for searching for primes, the direct approaches are so computationally intense, instead testing 2^n +/-1 (plus if n
IAmTheBadW01f
Is even, minus if n is odd to avoid multiples of 3)
LordFluffulus
Yes this is why 1111111 is the best number
IAmNotASkeleton
And it's one louder, innit?
phlat6
you are awesome
Bumcivilian
Stone 'enge.
IAmNotASkeleton
No we're not gonna fackin' do Stone'enge.
Fuzzysteve
https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/spinal_tap_amps.png
Imapancakenom
.... ..... .... ..... These go to eleven.
tacoforest
Aelinsaar
Hitting on you with math? Do you have her number? :p
unbelievablejustletmein
Re-read the comment. The girl was asking for their number. The commenter is the one who brought math into it
Aelinsaar
Bah.
LearnedCoward
You didn't say 73 or 37?
HighSlayerRalton
60 is divisive by so many integers; why wouldn't you pick that!
TheGovernor2
73 is the 21st prime 37 is the 12th and 21 is the product of, hang on to your hats, 7 and 3.
LearnedCoward
5040. 5040 = 7! = (2^4)*(3^2)*5*7. I love this number. Number geekery intensifies.
IusedtobeapervertIstillambutIusedtobetoo
I rate this 5*7
HighSlayerRalton
5040 is somewhat difficult to managae with dice, though.
nerdguy99
It's just 840 dice with sixes
RickFlist
You don't know when people are hitting on you and you are a woman? I think you should check for a penis. Maybe a tiny one waaay up in there.
aaarghargblarg
Unless you tell me you flirt with every single woman you talk to, I don't think your argument stands. That, or you're never nice to anyone.
somanyfeels21
PUT IT WAAAAAY UP THERE RICK
thompsie
Made me cackle like a fucking hyena +1
RickFlist
I feel like this is a Rick and Morty reference but I don't watch the show so I got nothing and I'm sad about that. I want to have something.
JustAnotherBrett
It is a Rick and Morty reference. It's quoted wrong because Morty was the one putting it way up there.
somanyfeels21
I respect that. Me with Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad, LIFE. Didn't even notice you're a rick: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvyR5CR6-1A
RickFlist
"You're young. You've got your whole life ahead of you. And your anal cavity is still taught yet malleable." I really need to watch this.
somanyfeels21
Let's put it this way, I had never binged watched a show in my life until this.
IJumpThroughWindows
Like just shove your whole fist in there. To be sure, of course. And upload it too, I'm sure we have some "scientists" that's can review it.
Mycologics
Dude...
ohdeepthought
I'm probably really ugly but I don't notice guys flirting with me. Eh who cares one day I suppose it'll happen.
Pieisdeath30
is your name a hitchhikers reference?
ohdeepthought
Yes
Pieisdeath30
Awesome, Books or movie?
ohdeepthought
Both