algavinn
128004
3918
159
The nutcracker
Oct 3, 2019 5:37 AM
algavinn
128004
3918
159
PleaseRespectMyAsshole
Seriously, how is #2 considered "art"? That looks like something Sid from Toy Story would make.
dthninja2
Florida doesn't have a king; they're an autonomous collective.
TCGView
#2 weird flex, but okay.
sanaujiram
Jon Snow was brought back bc he was fated to kill Denarys when she went firey-psycho
Lindenheller
Guess what it’s another Australian animal. And yeah it will kill you.
SomaSantutxu
#2 the women are not objets... oh shit.
LesserSam
I dated a girl for awhile who smiled like Wednesday Addams smiled... I miss her a lot, sometimes.
Richter12x2
Millennials aside, I don't know if anyone in the world has all 5.
GodCommentMaker
#1 Fermat’s last theorem is extremely interesting you should look it up on YT highly recommend it
MigraMines
#4 is not part of the new border wall that is an older one in tx. the new one is a bit taller and yes people have climbed it too. though 1/2
MigraMines
many have gotten broken femurs backs hips and arms for their troubles too. 2/2
Trastion
In #4 they are not "taking selfies". All pictures are not selfies you ignorant fucks.
hotdudecurator
I don't understand why this is so hard for people to get...
algavinn
Braining is harder for some than others. Some of them, however, are good at eating glue.
StupidEnglishKnigit
The fat cat the cat door.... I laughed.
Vaars
#19 just perfect
boobsalot
Ahh the Skeksis
Vinboktu
Good dump. Thank you.
Tourine17
#4 that's the old wall just sayin
Tee2718
Whoever pulls the knife out becomes the next Florida Man
3Davideo
#13 Jet Fuel vs steel beams: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FzF1KySHmUA
Muffdiver9
#40 I have like 40% of maybe three of these, so like 1.2 total? But I couldn't check the box on any of them definitively.
joxaro
As a genX'er - show me a millenial who has more than two of those and I'll show you my pigs future manure...
j923571
Octopus guy is dead. Like really death
Ch1pHazard
I know right? Blue Ring Octopus. If it looks pretty and colourful, it will kill you.
witchnn
As an Aussie I panicked when I saw him holding the blue ringed deathopus
joxaro
am I the only one who recognizes that is the hand of a woman? I mean, I know this is the imgur but surely someone else has gotten a handjob
witchnn
Oh lord. I am a woman, I should know what a lady hand looks like.
joxaro
Well if it makes you feel any better - I received a hate speech warning for another comment in this thread where I pointed that out...
Justinicus
I was more concerned about the death squish than the dead hand.
YatekMorah
#22 philautia would be self-friendship, which is way more healthy than self-love.
InTheBeginningWasTheNerd
#40 1) Overeating is healthy, right? 2) Career... path? 3) I can afford books, so yay! 4) My hand is pretty satisfying. 5) Ahahahahaha. No.
algavinn
"hahahahhahahahahah......Word." -My wife.
MtMuschmore
There's a key component missing in that sugar daddy description that I hope you don't do to your pets.
techmonkey
"you can love your pets, but don't *LOVE* your pets"
ant32bit
Pretty sure there’s only one type of love.
EmeraldMoreLikeUninstall
#33
ThePastmaster
A ribbon worm.
techmonkey
It's a [REDACTED]. You're not supposed to be able to see them. A MTF has been dispatched to your location.
PurpleAppleBag
Angry bacon
thatsnotflyingitsfallingwithstyle
#40 how many have even one??
ihateimgurffs
I have all but the first one.
DeZaim
Honestly I don't want to die, but I dislike a lot of what's going on around me. I have a full time job, but not a career path.
IThoughtIWouldNeverChangeMyUserNameUntilNow
This
skwint
I've got the last one. I'm going down fighting. But I'm not a millenial so I don't count.
TheDraperyFalls
#35 Leon Advogato attorney at paw.
TheDraperyFalls
Also I just found out advogato is Portuguese for lawyer, which is fun.
3Davideo
Technically Portuguese for lawyer is advogado, and it's a pun with the Portuguese word for cat, gato.
Falanxzealot
Watching DareDevil?
doobiedoobop
Who's the darwin award candidate holding a blue-ring octopus in his bare hands?
Toohastybyfar
ded.
DungeonMaster69
#22 it's not like you think. I just have a deep friendship with dead bodies
algavinn
How deep? ;)
DungeonMaster69
THEfreshestbrew
I wanna go to the secret bar!!
FauxRealYo
You got to be pretty chill for that one. Sorry, don’t think you are cool enough.
usernamemustbe4characterslonng
Secret bars are fun. I’ve found a few in different cities!
Stofele
How the fuck do you just find them!?!?!? Are there some in my city?
usernamemustbe4characterslonng
Finding the location is simple. Figuring out how to get inside is the tricky part.
usernamemustbe4characterslonng
Google helps. Talking to locals, ask about speakeasies. I don’t know about your area.
DoorCellar
It's called a Speakeasy. There may be one near you.
joxaro
No it isn't - A speakeasy is an unlicensed bar in a hidden location - not a licensed bar playing pretend.
DoorCellar
I don't really care about the specific technical definition. You want to use. That doesn't change the fact that (perhaps incorrectly) they
DoorCellar
ARE called Speakeasys and that is useful information for someone who might wish to visit one.
joxaro
And you're exactly the kind of sucker the marketing is targeted at. Because you'll believe something is cool because they said it is cool...
trinabeana23
AGREED plus if anyone would know what they r talking about when it comes to Speakeasys it's a cellar door ;)
SenatorFrankUnderwear
Given that we no longer live in prohibition times, that's a Speakeasy.
usersayswhat
Nah there's bars that don't bother with getting legally approved
FLFrank42
What the fuck is the pink thing?
MyBigMouth
Forbidden Bacon
baconandmorebacon
No bacon is forbidden! *eats pink thing* .... O_O .... *leaves quietly* *closes door quietly* *collapses loudly*
NZSheeps
DoorCellar
Ribbon worm.
RoutemasterFlash
Blinking White Guy.
Safebox36
Forbidden gummies.
ThePastmaster
It's a ribbon worm.
StarkRG
Sentient tongues.
AlwaysTrustTheManInABigWhiteVan
The new fleshlight with an urethral probing function
algavinn
No.
BobTheBogus
The meat-monster from stranger things.
xUnrealRealityx
Sea Cucumber, I believe.
techmonkey
it is a [REDACTED].
venomlash
Nemerteans are weird.
CatatonicCowMoo
I thought it was tongues. Guess I was wrong.
badthaught
Flatworm maybe??
algavinn
Some kind of sea slug type thing.
imnotgoodwithschedules
Next questions, what the fuck did it spit out and why?
DoorCellar
It's tongue. Self defence mechanism.
asight4azoreseyes
“My best guess is that the worm is dying and that's why it's breaking apart," he explained.
imnotgoodwithschedules
Found it: https://www.earthtouchnews.com/oceans/oceans/the-sad-facts-behind-that-multiplying-ribbon-worm-video/
ilsalta
:(
ThePastmaster
Well that's sad...
klondikez
I know, I'll never find out cuz I'm too lazy to click the link too
Leetri
Probably a sea cucumber. They spit out their intestines when they feel threatened.
ancientnorseman
WTF
ThePastmaster
A dying ribbon worm.
alternator43
Okay but like, aren't they supposed to pull it back in or smth?? It looked like it just sorta disconnected its guts and left them there 0_o?
BaconCat10
Also ribbon worm not sea cucumber
monkey484
In the article posted they discard it if threatened. Predator goes for the proboscis and it is able to escape
BaconCat10
Yeah... They can't pull it back and then they die. It doesn't make much sense for self preservation does it?
JacobiH3rbshire
Tongues..
tychog99
Anyine else feel sorry for the person with the yellow with purple spots octopus on their hand? Cuz he dead. That thing is venomous as fuck.
BiggestAndReddest
I SAW THAT AND HAD A HEART ATTACK
irishPEDOelf
Wasn't this the guy who had liver cancer and was going to die anyway, and way more painful death.
hechicera84
You know what.... good for him if that’s true. How many of us kind of want to touch the forbidden octopod but don’t bc death?
Scrampy123
Yeah... They're in the rock pools here where I live in Tasmania. Pretty though. Only blue when agitated. Brown otherwise. Don't touch em.
tychog99
Look, don't touch. Goes for any animal that's brightly coloured where similar animals are camo'd. It usually means they are dangerous af.
LiberianGirl
Blue ringed octopus ?
braechnov
Yep, blue-ringed Octopus, deadliest cephalopod. Enough venom to kill 25 adult humans. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue-ringed_octopus
lovehandlesmessiah
And all along I thought this was about my ex-wife.
MyPetPenguinIsLicensedToKill
I'm surprised there wasn't any mention of culinary use. Humans tend to love the challenge of preparing and eating what we aren't supposed to
lovehandlesmessiah
We tend to die from Kuru when we cut it too close to home.
NaughtButOne
Only if it bites. Lots of stories of people holding them and later being told what they were.
tychog99
Well, the slime and literally every bit of living tissue contains the same toxin so yeah. Leave it the fuck alone.
somewhatokcyclist
Jealous
DoorCellar
I downvoted the post for that reason. We don't need people thinking it's ok to handle them.
algavinn
I can respect that.
STINKPICKEL
I think it's shopped, colors are of an excited or threatened one, plus the one tentacle should be wrapped or hanging and it's not .
BettyWhiteSupremacy
No. Leave nature alone. It’s not there for your instagram account.
joxaro
This is one instagram trend I could actually support - we could even do it like the tidepod challenge - take a picture with it in your mouth
tychog99
well, one thing: he either died or it's fake. No middle ground.
Damiv
They were terminal iirc and had zero fucks left
ShadyVermin
Isn't that the person that made the news a couple months back? Some tourists in Auz or whatever that was.
ShadeEmberi
that thing is also photoshop
tychog99
The slime on its body is deadly on touch and afaik there's no cure for it.
Falanxzealot
Whoever downvoted this, you're wrong. They *also* exude venom through all tissues that are in contact with water. The whole octopus
Falanxzealot
has measurable tetradotoxin content, even the heart
braechnov
Actually it bites to inject venom. The bite is often painless but the result is paralysis and death shortly after.
taciturnpachyderm
In MINUTES. There's also no cure. Scary shit. Thankfully they're not super aggressive.
njessup1992
It's possible it didn't bite, but holding one is... very unwise.
MassStorageDeviceCanNowBeSafelyRemoved
I read it's not aggressive, however they really don't like being picked up, no antidote, so yeah, rip that person
njessup1992
I've found them a few times. They aren't aggresive at all, they hide under shells/rocks in shallow water.
morgrimmoon
No antidote, but the venom only lasts a day or two. If you put the victim on life support before the brain damage sets in, they'll recover.
MetaSomma
You make that sound like it's no big deal
ilikeyourburger
Sounds expensive
tesseract4d2
Given that they're only found around Australia, probably not. Pretty sure Aus had national Healthcare
tychog99
Good luck getting to the hospital and on life support within 2 minutes of being bitten. 'Cuz that's how long you have before you die.
morgrimmoon
Yeah. You need friends willing to call an ambulance and do CPR until the ambulance arrives. It's one of the reasons we're taught about them.
aHappyGecko
I saw this on the news a little while ago, the guy got lucky and it didnt bite. He didnt realise what he was holding until he got home
[deleted]
[deleted]
MassStorageDeviceCanNowBeSafelyRemoved
so women are not people?
joxaro
good lord people. quit looking for stuff to be offended by - I wasn't commenting that women are not people - I was saying that it was a ...
joxaro
woman's hand - so using the male pronoun "he" or the generic "person
MassStorageDeviceCanNowBeSafelyRemoved
why would the generic be incorrect
joxaro
was incorrect
andthedipshitoftheweekawardgoesto
I’ve spoken to people who had one in a fish tank and couldn’t figure out why all the other fish were dying. Turns out they ooze venom.
JustASlightJingleOfPocketChangePulsing
Wouldn't that make them poisonous?
andthedipshitoftheweekawardgoesto
Dunno, but I certainly wouldn’t eat one.
morgrimmoon
Yes. They are both poisonous AND venomous.
nobodyyouveheardof
Tetrodotoxin can be found in nearly every organ and gland of its body. Even in sensitive areas- such as the Needham's sac, branchial heart,
nobodyyouveheardof
nephridia, and gills- tetrodotoxin tested positive and has no effect on the creature’s normal functions.[15] This may be possible through a
nobodyyouveheardof
unique blood transport. In fact, the mother will even inject the neurotoxin into her eggs to make them generate their own poison before
AlarmClockBandit
Yep, Aussie here and we wouldn't go near that thing. We know our deadly animals ok.
KnyteTech
Isn't that just "all of them except Cane toads" ?
theknitter1337
And possums. Apparently America and Australia got their possums mixed up in transit.
AlarmClockBandit
Some are cute and cuddly. Good to have huntsman spiders in the house to eat insects for example. Just a matter of knowing how to handle em.
tychog99
Ergo: leave them the fuck alone and leave when they appear?
DeZaim
Fuck you mean except cane toads? Those fuckers are poisonous too!
tychog99
Isn't the backslime of cane toads hallucinogenic rather than deadly?
CorporalHumungousErectus
You can boil them and drink the water
DeZaim
Both. Rarely do people die, but dogs are extremely susceptible.