zeldaisthegirl1
134620
4354
169
Cat tax
mrc990112
The cartoon about feeling like your on auto pilot is the most accurate thing I’ve ever read. Is there a name for that?
BeesKneesJohanson
#12
GlenL
That is the most on the nose description of Mortal Kombat I've ever heard
FiveShiftOne
People who try to tell me fantasy reptiles can't have boobs are joyless and should go away.
DanFranzen
#4 I say it's this one /a/Mfg40F4
ImForcedToMakeMemesAgainstMyWill
Oh, that is a good one.
SpecialAgentPinkfinger
When people talk about good marbling on meat it's the fat. You do want some.
stevtom27
Wishful thinking made me see #1 as Hello there General Kenobi
WhitePoetWarlord
Wait, are there any lawyers here that can confirm?
Cyrielx2
#17 this would actually get me interested in caring about anything DC makes tbh.
pizzapartyhard
Linda???
v
KingWilldaBeast
Just verified #1 for 646-926-6614. It’s true. Now I know not to make women uncomfortable.
241MidlifeIdentityCrisis
#2 TIL I must be delicious.
ReginaKasteen
#1 Isn't that what 867-4309 is for?
ReginaKasteen
(watch as I get the number completely wrong...)
HeyOP
This post makes me feel unsafe, OP.
CapitalNick
#1 And now women will be doing this for "fun" to fuck around with a guy and give him a complex.
TooOldToBeRealLife
Anyone who does is a very mean person and will find ways to be mean even without it. Some people just suck & we sensitive souls get hurt.
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CapitalNick
God forbid.
YutteHermsgervordenbrotborda
There's a reason many women aren't quick to say that outright in person.
ichegoya
Actually, fat is often the most flavorful part of meat
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
It's why Kobe beef is a thing. No fat, no flavour.
TheGirlWithTheHummingbirdTattoo
#1 is stupid. you think a misogynist is going to care what a phone recording has to say about him?
Jotun615
Kinda want to know what that lady called her cats mum
FrancisFulloffrenchpeople
#28 is not a MtG card. Snakes in MtG have titties. See: Sakiko Mother of Summer, Sakura-Tribe Scout, and Shizuko Caller of Autumn.
RedOvermorrow
snilk
Qualtagh
I'm baffled by the fact that you seem to think you know every MtG card.
TopCommenter
You just cited 3 Kamigawa cards as though Wizards hasn't done everything they could for nearly 15 years to bury that set.
turomar
how do we know is female? could be a very handsome mansnake?
Metatality
That's Naga Vitalist from the Amonket Set, it is very much a magic card, and they've done their best to improve over the last 5 or so years.
FrancisFulloffrenchpeople
Ah, it's a Naga. I looked for Snakes and Gorgons.
mitharas
You're my kind of guy/gal, converting with knowledge and source.
Metatality
https://gatherer.wizards.com/Handlers/Image.ashx?multiverseid=426878&type=card
mitharas
/a/XR5IJ1c
FiveShiftOne
Why is it an improvement? Why can't fantasy snake women have tits? Why you gotta discriminate? Let them have tits if they want tits.
Metatality
No not that specifically, they've made a lot of changes both in game and tournament to help ladies feel more comfortable playing generally.
groovinlow
#11 *Womboval
RedJacketHero
#28 creatures in MTG are actually just magically animated 3d images that the caster pulls from their memory of encountering that creature.
RedJacketHero
So basically that snake girl met a planeswalker, but didn't want them summoning her unless she was looking her best.
RedJacketHero
So when she encountered the most powerful being she had ever met, she made them wait around until she had finished her skin care routine.
OppoQuinn
Cat in #29 is a girl, you can tell because the last name. Suffix "dóttir" is the Norse word for 'daughter'.
Corona688
Is t hat really how icelandic spells things? like how we pretend umlauts sound?
TheForbiddenSemicolon
Huh? What’s this?...ANGST evolved into ANXIETY!
TheRickestRickFromEarthDimensionC137
Angstiety
ap0ll0rojas
Might as well be ANGSTXIETY “Angst means fear or anxiety (anguish is its Latinate equivalent, and anxious, anxiety are of similar origin).”
RevolutionOnHerLips
ich habe angst, mutti
amispoppihylje
When I was 15 I was saying dark shit and nobody bat an eye, I’m now 25 and still thinking it, but can’t say it so nobody calls an ambulance.
CapitalNick
#8 Except Scorpion and Sub-Zero. They're like estranged brothers or something.
Macmacfire
And unfortunately, that's kind of the only plot Netherrealm studios uses...
ShouldersDeepInAHorse
#1 If you're looking for a unisex option, just give them the number to your local church and hope Jesus can fix their creepy ass
ReginaKasteen
Historically, Jesus is not good at fixing creepy asses.
ShouldersDeepInAHorse
He fixed a lot of them, it's just that the few he did NOT fix kinda ended up being some of the worst creepy asses there were.
GondwanaCraton
#4 Reminds me of the time I sent my father home after he showed up unannounced, again. It was a recurring issue with him, and sending him
GondwanaCraton
home was the only way to attempt to secure the privacy of my wife and I.
SuperSaiyanSasquatch
#2 is just describing waygu beef and all of barbecuing (which many believe was invented initially for canabalism)
CatatonicCowMoo
Hold the fucking phone. It was invented for what now?
SuperSaiyanSasquatch
http://barbeclue.com/bahamas-cannibalism-and-the-bloody-origins-of-barbecue/
CatatonicCowMoo
Interesting read, but I don't really see the connection of cannibalism to barbecue. Sorry.
Corona688
Just the word. Barbacoa.
Someshithead241
The Joker does do clown stuff like squirt flowers and make balloon animals. Its just acid flowers and laughing gas balloons. Its kinds his
DashingTimelord
For anyone who laughed at the post look up Badman Interrogation (College Humour)
LMeire
*Smilex, not just laughing gas. Victims die with their faces contorted into a painful "grin" as all their muscles lock up pre-mortem.
Someshithead241
I've only ever heard that referred to as laughing gas or joker venom, which I think is dumb. Smilex is a good name but thats what I meant.
Someshithead241
Whole schtick. Makes me almost think you only know the joker from 2 of the movies he has been in.
Thecreatorofthejonasbrothers
That's not the same thing at all though. They were referring to spraying people with water or using regular little hand buzzers not murder.
Someshithead241
They didn't say non murder stuff, just clown stuff, implying that he didn't act like a clown, which he does. A murder clown
ThatNameWasTaken
Didthis guy think Batman’s problem with the joker is his clown act? Like he’s mad because he’s gloomy Batman and this guys making jokes?
ThatNameWasTaken
They’re enemies because all the other rogues are serious, twisted, hardcore, and joker is ruining everything with his colorful costumes!
MrPuckett
Huh #1 is actually true I just called it. Not a bad resource.
RadioZombieHazard
But what if you text it?
Reform00
Wait, i got valled by a 6614 number? Different area code but still weird timing lol
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Effyroams
Not a common problem for men.
MaxReboBand
Googled rejection lines and the first one is gender neutral: 605–475–6968
blklthr
And now you're on a list...
DrWhoBatmanWarrior
Wait what?
TimmyDans
Anyone remember the rejection hotline?
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canyouthriveat35
There’s a number you can call in my hometown that gives the current time and temperature. That’s what I gave out.
CatatonicCowMoo
But what if he texts? What happens then?
microcactus
Send dick pics.
CatatonicCowMoo
Thankfully I have a dick around 24/7 I can take pics of to do that! Good answer.
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[deleted]
Taxicat
So in other words, your flirtations were NOT WELCOME? And you didn’t take no for an answer? Hm...
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Taxicat
So your flirtations were unwanted and you’re whining about it.
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SociopathicOtter
Too bad it’s useless since guys will test call or test text, first, asking to see your phone to see if it goes through or not.
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
What, seriously? That's a red flag right there.
SociopathicOtter
Well the number’s used in red flag situations, so yeah...
DoublePop
Tbh I'd sooner use snapchat than phone numbers regardlesss, it's easier to add each other and has more features.
KingKolunikus
#1 And then enjoy the situation right after he calls the number right away to check if it's valid, while you're still there.
CapitalNick
Or tries to text it.
Snooj
Wow, #1 is actually true. I always call numbers when they show up on here and their legitimacy is about 50/50.
ImForcedToMakeMemesAgainstMyWill
I mean...If he tries to call your number while you're standing right there cause he's skeptical, I kinda feel like he deserved that number.
KingKolunikus
He may just be checking if he's entered it into his phone correctly.
Ryanator50
he doesn't deserve your number unless you wanna fuck him.
KingKolunikus
I feel like this number exists for women to give out to guys who corner women and leave them no choice. You know, grade A assholes.
Ryanator50
exactly
KingKolunikus
So it's not about deserving a number or not, it's about self-protection. And it will do a bad job of that if the guy checks it right away.
HeyOP
1) Calling/texting the number on the spot seems the reasonable way to exchange them if you're serious about exchanging numbers. It doesn't
HeyOP
2) have to be "your *number* you say, well let's see about that" so much as "look I'm really interested, I want
HeyOP
3) "to make sure neither of us made a mistake in this exchange."
HeyOP
4) Especially with a text or voicemail; "hey [x] it's me [y] we met right now at [location] and you should definitely call me tomorrow."