SupremeDGAF
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"I saw many humans on whom there were no clothes,
I saw many clothes in which there were no humans"
-Rumi
See more at: http://truthseekerdaily.com/2014/06/this-is-what-happens-to-most-people-when-they-go-to-church-every-sunday-wpictures/#sthash.HmsbzbjB.dpuf
TawannaAgliam16
After I saw Dogma my views on religion changed and I know see how fucked up it actually is
aselfdefeatingattitude
Is shit really that bad in Heaven that angels have to beg?
bantex123
+1 for Rumi
kazmosis
+1 for +1ing Rumi
SavagePlutocrat
Most people with this kind of personality aren't praying for the betterment of the world, they're praying for the betterment of themselves.
MaybeOneDayIWillFinallyGrowAPenis
This is deeper than the Pacific Ocean. I love it.
onecupshort
To be far they do teach Mathew 25:34-46 in church. People just don't listen.
Ohioan
Good guy God, had those hobo angels come back to heaven. That's the point of the story, right?
HereticsAllOfYou
It used to be a common notion among Christians that the poor they encountered were angels in disguise, so they would be extra charitable.
thiscannotpossiblygowrong
So basically you wouldn't be helping people who really need help, just a couple of angels trying to say "GOTCHA! Now you're damned to hell!"
HereticsAllOfYou
Or you're just trying to be charitable because you realize poor people matter just as much as angels.
thiscannotpossiblygowrong
In that case just say to help poor people. This logic is clearly "help poor people because you might scorn the wrong guy and go to hell"
Studoku
Angels are dicks sometimes.
nellethiel
As a Christian, I don't read this as "bashing". To me it says, "Sometimes the answer God gives you... is you. So don't be selfish, asshat."
Yoshiru
I think the "straw man" fallacy applies here
IAlreadyReachedImguriteSoIDontCareAboutMyPointsAnymore
So many straws. The camels back is broken
nikosuave
Who brings their dog to church?
skatebeard
You took the letters right out of my hands.
nacnac
Am I the only person who thought it was going to end with that bitch dying?...
blackandyellow
ijustbluedmyself
I work in retail and can confirm that we get the biggest arseholes right after church is done on Sunday
itscalledCRACK
Class A Bitch right there mhmm
Superduperawesomesauce
That dog part made a piece of dust fly into my eyes.....
jackbos
Bashing Christians on imgur. Edgy... so very edgy...
HeatLegend
How's this bashing christians?
cjgrayso
Did I see the Ambiguously Gay Duo? With wings?
Ullur
I am just old enough to catch that reference.
Ispentthelastfewyearsbuildingupanimmunitytoiocanepowder
I am sorry this comic chose to portray solely Christians in this light. :( many Christians, including myself make a huge effort to help.
Ispentthelastfewyearsbuildingupanimmunitytoiocanepowder
Others. Ppl who are not of faith can be just as self centered as anyone else. Problem is humans are all flawed. Even Christians.
HeatLegend
It didn't, it portrayed a group of hypocritical christians, which we all know not all are
TheRealPancakeMan
You might get a lot of downvotes for this. But I personally love this, and am favoriting it.
s4vedbygr4ce
I hope he gets more upvotes...I'm a regular church goer and yeah - there are planty of those, sadly...but also plenty honest ones! :)
TheRealPancakeMan
I don't believe in a higher power, but I completely respect the ideals religion provides. I don't respect people who act as depicted here.
[deleted]
[deleted]
ImJustHereSoIDontGetFined
I wish it would. I hypocritical Christian thing is done to death here (and no, I'm not a Christian).
Laitka
now if it was showing atheists in a bad light however..
TheRealPancakeMan
I'd hope not!
SupremeDGAF
Thank a lot!
Laitka
on a scale of neckbeard to Dawkins, how atheist are you?
ColonelObvious
Haha, that's a great scale :) You didn't ask me, but in my experience, I've gone from don't-care atheist to Dawkins, being a sexual minority
SweetStache
I'm not religious, but I think all the church slamming needs to stop. Dislike people for being bad people, not bad people who are religious.
HeatLegend
OP's post dislike hypocrits, not religous people
SweetStache
I can understand that, but alot of people are hypocrits not just religious people. I stand my ground on my point.
HeatLegend
Im sure OP is aware of that
SweetStache
most definitely :)
PartyOverImOut
As an atheist, I think this is just saying that even though you pray to help the world, it won't work unless you do your part to help.
SmarmyHamster
As a Christian, I agree with you. Wanting the world to be a better place, but doing nothing to make it so, is ridiculous.
NewCreatures
Faith without works is dead.
PartyOverImOut
I could be wrong though... I am just a baby-eating heathen lol
brotherofJared
Christ taught this exact same principle in the parable of the good Samaritan. Luke 10:25-37
Berethian
If only more people paid attention to it. Instead you have apparently religious Republicans scorning the poor.
IdDoJeremyClarkson
With that username and comment combo, I'm guessing you're a Christian :)
rectalprolapse
no he just went to Jared. :)
plurez
First things first, I am not the best when it comes to helping others, I try, but I am not perfect.
DonaldTrumpsPubicCombover
Honestly, if you try I think that's incredible. I wish people could at least care, if not try to help. The little things add up.
ChuckNorrisAteMySock
Nobody is perfect. The way I see it, just go out there and help somebody. Anybody. "If you can't feed a hundred people, then just feed one."
plurez
This set of pics is perfect for what the world is like... we all expect God to do the work when in reality, God wants to use US to do it
contemplativeobserver
Don't be silly, I expect everybody else to do the work.
ThatGuyWithTheTopHat
Good people mean well, even when they don't always do well. Your thoughts and intentions factor in.
tinycrocodile
People, what a bunch of bastards
tsamneb
Well, according to this cartoon, it's specifically, "Christians, what a bunch of bastards."
DoesntUnderstandTheReference
I didn't upvote because of what an overused reference this is. There are other more original and funny comments that couldv'e been upvoted.
DoesntUnderstandTheReference
fuck made a type could've
IAmUncleIroh
Bastard coated bastards with bastard filling.
wombatleader
Got that right, that what pets are for. I would give that dog a home but first take it to the vet to have the poor thing checked out.
IChangedMyNameForThis
A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals
AnimeAssassin
Not all of them.
burnyrocknrolla
This woman is Jen (Coffee toss tramp bitch)
ishouldbedoinghw
swaggersaurus
especially cartoon people drawn into comics
illJustPutTheFireOverHereWithTheRestOfTheFire
My relevance is mild to this statement.
blzrdphoto
I just watched that episode the other day. Classic Moss...
LinksAsleepening
This is some ham-fisted social commentary
CommentsOnImgur
It bothers me that this isn't top comment; it appalls me that it isn't even close... JK U GO IMGUR SHOW DEM CHRISTCHUNS WHO AM BOSS
Ragnarockandroll
I've met some of the most judgemental people in church, and some of the kindest people to be covered in tattoos.
moxymox
Those groupings of people aren't even relatable. That's like saying "I love the rain and mayonnaise tastes good."
Ragnarockandroll
Yep.
PresidentSmelborp
I've met some lovely people in churches with tattoos... tattoos aren't a sign of a non-Christian.
deranger
Almost like going to church or getting tattoos doesn't determine everything about someone.
CaptainAmerica24
you're a witch. BURN THE WITCH.
thehammerismypenis
I've also met nice people in church and judgemental people covered in tattoos.
lowbike1
I am a christian and have a lot of tattoos.... What does that make me? Maybe indifferent?
dietcokebreath
As a pastor, I agree with your assessment. :)
ColonelObvious
I know what you're trying to cover up drinking by having diet coke afterwards, pastor, and it's not fooling anyone
MrJohnsonAndTheJuiceCrew
i hope everybody notices the "some"
RicecakesMcgee
I've seen this on Facebook once a month
ondaheightsofdespair
I've met some of the worst people covered in tatoos, and some of the kindest people in church. You have a point but it's not very good.
Ragnarockandroll
You understand what "some" means, right? You're a person, but you seem like a pretentious jerk.
ondaheightsofdespair
I may be a pretentious jerk. But keep in mind that I am just a reflection of your pretentiousness.
therealbilbobaggins
I've met some people covered in tattoos in church
HarperLee
I like those churches
NewCreatures
THANK YOU
ihavethepower
I have many tattoos and go to church. Catholic church even. I'm not judgmental though. Well, kind of, but not that kind of judgmental.
ChuckNorrisAteMySock
As a (loose) Christian, I have to agree with you. Non-douchy religious folks are becoming harder and harder to find.
AznInvazn
I'm not religious, but I think that most Christians are good people, with the horrible minority having the loudest voice.
therealbilbobaggins
What is a "loose Christian?"
ChuckNorrisAteMySock
Basically I still identify myself as a Christian, but I agree with the atheists a lot of the time. In other words, I'm pretty much just (1)
ChuckNorrisAteMySock
on the fringes of religion. As close to being an agnostic as you can get without actually being one. (2)
ColonelObvious
Might party wildly on the occasional Sunday? Smoke pot after church?
AeroWalrus
As have I. I've also seen the opposite just as much.
Retsam19
Yes, there are Christians who are hypocrites, as with any group, but as someone who has known many, I've found them to be the exception.
SpicedNipples
I think this is a modernisation of the good samaritan parable
SirPremierViceroy
[1] That wasn't really the point in my opinion. I think the comic was just pointing out that people are hypocritical and will use any
SirPremierViceroy
[2] excuse to justify their behavior.
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TheGreatMizuti
Damn that must've been a big church to fit every Christian in the world!
whatisshefunnyorsomething
Went to church every Sunday and Wednesday until i turned 18, the worst people I know are Christians
Ionlycommentonthings
If the worst people you know are Xtian, you need to get that chip off your shoulder and get out more. Try living in Sudan or Syria.
LizardDrainer
Sadly I gotta agree with this
NewCreatures
Most humans are hypocrites, because we are human.
deadcow
Christians are great, until they realize you are not Christian as well.
Retsam19
I actually think I treat non-Christians better than Christians, because I don't want to contribute to someone's negative view of Christians.
TheVenocWarlord
Hey now, not all of us. I treat non-Christians the same. I try to treat everyone fairly. Sadly, we seem to be a minority in that, though.
deadcow
I know some amazing people who happen to be Christian. I understand its not all of them, but it seems that way sometimes.
TheShootpark56
That may be true sometimes but most of the time, if you're not christian, they'll give you the whole shpeel then if you politely (1/2)
NationalistCanadianMooseWarrior
Most people (including me) find the "whole shpeel" rather unnecissary.
TheShootpark56
decline, they'll let it go, at least that's how I was raised, and have seen other Christians act.
NationalistCanadianMooseWarrior
That is true to an extent with some. The most devout will like you but think it's unfortunate that you don't share their beliefs.
NationalistCanadianMooseWarrior
(I have a friend who is EXTREMELY Christian. This is the case with him, and from what I understand, most others.)
lily10110
That's bullshit. You aren't hanging out with the right "Christians" then. I'm a Sunday School teacher, yet my best friend is a Satanist.1/2
lily10110
Christians should (not saying all will) treat you all the same. If anything, judge other Christians more harshly. (2/2)
lily10110
Bonus: I don't know if I was clear with my bullshit. More at the situation that s/he has have to dealt with.
Kaysmira
Isn't this basically the story of the Good Samaritan before the Samaritan showed up? Two very, very "religious" men avoided the injured man.
HackerJacker
Yes. Sadly some churchgoers don't get it.
CarlosPerfectHair
I think it's more along the lines of 'what you do for the least of these, you do for me' that and 'entertaining angels unaware'
minnow1776
2/2 personal piety), but they still disobeyed God by putting their own purity above the two most important commandments: love God, love your
minnow1776
3/2 neighbor. Those two commandments supersede all other commandments.
Kaysmira
Well said. I might have been a bit off with comparing it to the comic, but many religious people today are still like the priest and Levite.
cTrix
And still relevant 2000 years later.
mackenzington
I feel like this puts that parable into a modern day perspective, something much needed for many Christians today sadly
minnow1776
1/2 The "religious" men were technically following what they believed to be the most important religious laws (laws regarding purity and
dactyif
The thing is, samaritans were considered unpure, so buddy STILL helped, the story has many levels.
suchareq3
The entire moral of the whole Christianity as a relligion is "u don't have to be a christian u just gotta be a cool person and its k"
khora
Small observation: The Good Samaritan wasn't Christian.
Kaysmira
Valid observation, although floormatt87 is technically correct. The Samaritan was not religious in a way the priest or Levite would accept.
floormatt87
No1 was. This parable was b4 Christianity was fully established. In fact the Samaritans were hated by the Jews at the time as I understand.
Kaysmira
Then Jesus told him not to be like the hypocrites who couldn't be bothered, but to be like the Samaritan who had mercy on the wounded man.
TBKU
Thank you.
ElCoronel
Mitchell and Webb relate https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-nh7xOjkSs
HPWombat
"I'm busy! Busy! Dreadfully busy! You've no idea what I have to do! Busy! Busy! Horribly busy! Much much too busy for you!"
Harmonex
If memory serves, "Samaritan" held negative connotations at the time that was written, so it's was also a "don't judge a book" moral.
Kennoot
It would have been a separate Jewish sect from that of the injured man. The two other guys were of the SAME sect as him but didn't help him
itsaswellday
That is correct!
AtalanBeardy
Yup, the Samaritan being the one to stop and help was a hell of a twist.
Iamyourgrandmother
Samaritan held the connotation because they were products of Jewish and people considered pagans.
Kratoffel
but the wounded man in the story of the Good Samaritan didnt transform into an Angel with an fucking Diamonsword in an epic golden armor
punxsutawneyphyllis
What the story doesn't mention is that the two men who passed him by (a priest and a Levite) were forbidden to touch a dead body. (1/?)
KidGokuOmega
The man wasn't undoubtedly dead.
floormatt87
You're correct. But Jesus came to turn a lot of "tradition" and was he called "laws of man" that were not of God, on its head.
punxsutawneyphyllis
The story is written to make Jews look bad. If an ordinary Jew had passed by, he would likely have helped the man, because he wouldn't (2/?)
HackerJacker
It's not about making jews look bad, it's about making hypocrits look bad
punxsutawneyphyllis
have had to worry about touching a dead body if the man died on him. (3/3)
Kaysmira
I don't feel it makes Jews look bad, it makes the priest and the Levite look bad. Multiple times during his ministry, Jesus was 1/
Kaysmira
accused of breaking the Sabbath, and he rebuked them for caring more about the rules than about the people the rules were there for.
Kaysmira
Giving you upvotes because you added more perspective to story, how the men felt their actions were justified, the lawyer would know that.
AThiefOfTime
Friendly reminder that not all Christians are douchebags in the hopes that this doesn't turn into an atheist circlejerk
[deleted]
[deleted]
CaptainAmerica24
downvote fairies are all over jokes today
hitlerosamahusseinstalinallgavemetheircombinedbreastmilk
This is the BEST thing I have heard all day. I can only give you one +1 but man I wish I could give a thousand.
BDSMpickle
I am an athiest. There are good atheists and bad atheists. And the same with any religion. Let's just be excellent to each other ok?
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
I am an atheist who strongly believes in religious freedom. My ex is an atheist who likes to call god a "sky fairy" smh
OrwellianSpacePrincess
This person deserves a medal sandwich.
BDSMpickle
:D
wronggengirl
THANK YOU. I agree that some Christians don't walk the walk, but man I get sick of white-washing Christian-bashing.
youcansayfuckhere
This comic is a Christian comic. As a former Christian, I know you bash each other more than we ever could.
LegiblePoet
Excuse my foreign but what's white-washing?
rectalprolapse
It's an overgeneralization, or a stereotype.
TheGayPenguin
I find these posts tend to become multiple mini circlejerks, both Christian and anti-theist, as each comment thread gets a different group.
meeksmcgee
Thanks for that. We're all just people in the end, we can all strive towards ideals.
nopost
Too late.
phatbastard77
I'd have to do a 1/at least 20 to truly comment on this subject.
nihilityfarce
Atheist all my life, but downvoted because I'm sick of imgur's narrow-minded circlejerks based on tearing down the strawman.
HeatLegend
Friendly reminder that this is a joke on hypocrisy, in hopes that it doesnt turn into an "atheist are assholes post"
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
I am an atheist and when I lost my home my best friend and her family took me in. Everyday they pray for me and while I don't join them 1/2
LiterallyYourMom
I see atheists get indignant about religion about the same as religious indignant about atheists. Remember the vocal ones are a minority.
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
I know they are doing it because they love me. They are amazing people who have a strong faith (that I just don't happen to share) 2/2
ifuckinglovedinosaurs
I am not a religious man, but I noticed a lot of people I know are very anti-racism, anti-homophobia etc, they're incredibly judgemental 1/2
ifuckinglovedinosaurs
Of Christians, however. It's like 'fuck you for judging people on their skin or sexuality!' Then 'oh fuck a selfish idiot Christian' 2/2
morgrimmoon
Speaking of personal experience, nobody has ever hurt me for their race/sexuality. They HAVE hurt me -because- they're christian though.
ifuckinglovedinosaurs
Yeah I was going to add: that said, some of the most downright unpleasant people I've met have been Christians.
pseudologiafantastica
Thanks for this :) it's the hypocrites who give Christians a bad name. We're not all like this.
ImTheWalrus
Just another example of something where everyone likes to point out the bad and ignore the good.
rectalprolapse
Really, it's up to us to give ourselves (and God) a better name.
SayIAmYou
I would kinda enjoy seeing an atheist circlejerk kicked off on a post summarised by a Muslim philosopher, but we seem to be avoiding it.
NationalistCanadianMooseWarrior
Don't worry, I think imgur is mature enough to realize that.
Cersie
This gave me a chuckle
tipsytoees
Ha
ImTheWalrus
You must be new here…
Thepotatoknight
SpicedNipples
Cute
GingerTheBeard
my sweet summer child...
shift24q
LOL
squidwardscissorhands
My reaction exactly
CaptainAmerica24
Oh Honey
rectalprolapse
My exact response.
Tallguy28
As an atheist attending a Lutheran University. All Christians aren't ass holes. Some of them a pretty cool and fun to debate philosophy with
rectalprolapse
As a Christian, my most fun conversations with my atheists/agnostic friends have been about Christianity. It's fun if everyone's respectful.
chanieldoi
Can we all agree that people do this regardless of them being a church-goer or not?
FluffyMan93
I think it's supposed to mean that people pray to a higher power and expect said power to do something about it without having to take
FluffyMan93
action. In truth we gotta meet said higher power halfway and do our part.
chanieldoi
That's actually a GREAT interpretation of this comic. :) I'm just sick of people viewing these strips and criticizing the Church when they
chanieldoi
themselves aren't really doing much either. They call out hypocrites, when ironically they're hypocritical in the same sentiment.
terradi
As a non churchgoer, oh most definitely. I try to be a decent human being ... but I'm sure there are many more things I could do too.
chanieldoi
Thanks for agreeing and being introspective first. ^_^ cheers
TheDogCollector
Yes. We can agree on that. To disagree would be saying that all non-church going people DON'T do that...which we all know they do, too. :)
MySockHurts
If helping the poor was free I'd do it all the time
bonnebonnesjonjohn
There are a lot of things you can do to help te poor that are for free.
PlesiosaurWithElementsOfAnIdeaOfTheLochNessMonsterBoy
True, but there was a social experiment done not too long ago that showed Atheists tend to be more charitable than religious types.
Malkiot
Well, the religious type thinks that the poor bugger is at least going to have a nice afterlife.
floormatt87
Sources?
PlesiosaurWithElementsOfAnIdeaOfTheLochNessMonsterBoy
https://newscenter.berkeley.edu/2012/04/30/religionandgenerosity/ There was another that I remember seeing but can't find atm.
pixeldroid
https://newscenter.berkeley.edu/2012/04/30/religionandgenerosity/
brendanrhys
I don't think people are saying that. I think they're just commenting on the hypocrisy of the faith's message vs. reality.
binicorn
Thank you
AnotherGoblin
That bitch is probably a hashtag activist. Do good: get good. Do nothing: expect nothing. Karma man. I was naked and you clothed me. Love.
ManLegit
The faith is telling us to make better what we perceive to be reality, brolo.
IAmTheAwkwardPenguin
Its the hypocrisy of the practitioners of the faith, not of the faith itself.
ColonelObvious
Yes, this sums it up perfectly
InboxMeYourOods
No one is perfect. Non-churchgoers have morals (Or should) that they don't always follow as well.
[deleted]
[deleted]
NationalistCanadianMooseWarrior
Unfortunate.
Dolewhipper
True it is all "Religion is evil you idiots" these days.
wobbu
what if i think religion is evil but religious people are not
Dolewhipper
I usually hear it the other way around that religious people are evil and religion is not, i dont know lol now gimme a cookie god says so
chanieldoi
But I definitely do have a problem with religious people who act for the good of themselves, for selfish gain: i.e Pharisaic religion.
chanieldoi
Religious people are 'evil' depending on their intentions. I have no qualms with people who act religiously for the good of humanity.
ThatJerkYouKnow
lol, right? Because the millions of other atheists I'm surrounded by are ALL super hardcore into charity and helping the homeless.
Berethian
(Which is the whole point of this thing. It's not saying all Christians are bad, it's giving a specific example)
Malkiot
I'm an atheist. I'm also a nihilist, materialist, and transhumanist, with a healthy dash of anti-theist. Nothing about charity there.
AdonisInGlasses
Here-here!
Coonninja
As an existential nihilist and anti-theist, I perform acts of charity each day, because I fucking feel like it.
Berethian
They don't claim to ascribe to a philosophy built on charity and helping the homeless, however, and thus aren't steeped in hypocrisy.
[deleted]
[deleted]
Berethian
Yes, but Christians ascribe to a very specific one. It's written down and everything. Atheists don't have that, they aren't a bloc.
ThatJerkYouKnow
1/2 All the atheists I know, personally, are American. They all claim to ascribe to a philosophy of freedom and equality.
ThatJerkYouKnow
2/2 Thus, all the atheists I know are steeped in hypocrisy, because neither they nor their families are free and equal.
ThatJerkYouKnow
Point being: Everybody is a hypocrite. It's not limited to a certain religion/ nationality/ profession.
Malkiot
Are they in prison? Do they not have the same rights as other Americans?
Coonninja
Your philosophical desires not matching reality doesn't make you a hypocrite, unless you are actively creating it, which they aren't.
chanieldoi
The concept of hypocrisy is a paradox. Anybody pointing others out for hypocrisy is most likely a hypocrite themselves, even moreso for
Miniaturemac
Congratulations. You came to the conclusion that everyone is a hypocrite in some form. What's your point??
chanieldoi
calling people out on hypocrisy. The beauty of Christianity is that we understand we are hypocrites and thus need God even more.
Coonninja
Why hasn't your god cured any of you of hypocrisy? You people are like Cain, you're making the wrong sacrifices. He asked for blood. BLOOD!
Berethian
We're talking about an explicit hypocrisy. Daily, normal, human cognitive dissonance is a different matter.
chanieldoi
How is it hypocritical that Christians behave sinfully when scripture points out Christians are inherently sinful?
acertainjenesaisquoi
Going to church doesn't make you a christian, just like drinking hydraulic fluid doesn't make you a compressor.
[deleted]
[deleted]
acertainjenesaisquoi
The Church is not a defining factor, the person is.
veekat
Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken! - Tyler Durden
paper24
DON'T TAKE AWAY MY DREAMS!!!
Devils29
you just crushed my dreams of being a compressor :(
Dusseldwarf
bitch it might
Tagross
We'll see about that...
iSoulend
Former human - now a compressor - here, what the hell are you talking about, I drank 5L of it each day for 13 years and it worked out.
PunchViolenceInTheFace
Found the 72nd gender, http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/facebook/10930654/Facebooks-71-gender-options-come-to-UK-users.html
linkskywalker14
You can't just dismiss anyone in your movement/group you don't like as "Not REALLY part of the group." It's the No True Scotsman fallacy.
linkskywalker14
If a person believes Jesus is god, they are Christian. If they're an asshole, all it means is that some Christians are assholes.
copingcabana
You know what is so depressing?
Ihave6cats
Thank you! As a Christian I can't stand people that proclaim to believe and then act like this. You have to walk the walk and talk the talk.
SirusKing
No you don't. To be a Christian, all you need to do is accept Yahweh as god and Jesus as the son of god. Nothing else.
SirusKing
However, this doesn't make you automatically a nice person, as obvious.
nobodyblindedme
anyone remember that asian kid who wanted to be a transformer and kept drinking gasoline?
lukemwp
not with that attitude
PleaseUsername
Technically, compressors are for air, pumps are for hydraulic fluid
TheClassyGentleman
also just because you know how to fill up the headlight fluid doesnt make you a mechanic.
Justinpaulmorales
Stuffing feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.
cristinemaria
you. i like you.
succumbdefeat
I'm a receptionist at a hydraulic parts distributor ... needlessly to say tickled, and will steal the latter of this comment
lyinginbedmon
One can help solve the other, though
IKeepItOnMe
I get that reference!
acertainjenesaisquoi
There's a reference there?
Dolewhipper
Going to church makes you as much a christian as sitting in a garage makes you a car.
shapalapa
Best comment I've read in my life.
energ1ze
As a compressor, you don't know my life.
Choscura
Right. Believing a specific set of bullshit makes you Christian. Possibly also Muslim on accident, but confused about it.
JabbaTheHuttch
This is with out a doubt one of the best comments to ever be said on Imgur.
Tzaot
Technicaly, it does make you a compressor, but one that works terribly wrong.
bmasterflash
Yeah, stoning women for adultery makes you a Christian. Deut. 22:13-21
SirusKing
Following Yahweh and accepted Jesus as the son of god makes you a christian. If you go to church, you probably do both of these.
lotusgold733
Can confirm, happily compressed and hydraulic fluid free for 15+ years.
Shadehawk
I converted to a compressor for my wife, her parents are both compressors and she thought it might help us find some common ground.
TheManWithNoNameZappBrannigan
And there die my dreams of being a compressor....
TigPoe
Nice one!
Creyos
You mean being a christian doesn't make you a good person, right ? Cause being baptized makes you a christian, no matter what you do.
SirusKing
Believing in Yahweh and Jesus as the son of god makes you a christian, ie, a follower of christ, but baptism isn't required.
heavyAir
Sounds like a challenge to me
IMadeThisOnlySoICouldUpvote
This, is beautiful.
Xynatox
Especially if it's an episcopal church. Most of those people are just doing motions to make themselves feel better.
EvilHans
sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken...
Iamyu2
you are trying to stop evolution man. If people are smart enough to drink hydraulic fluid so they can become compressor we should let them.
Thor1229
There are some people I wish would drink hydraulic fluid....
ThePotatoesareMashed
Just like how eating a person doesn't make me a bear, or a shark!
acertainjenesaisquoi
Nope, just a cannibal.
treetastic
wait wait wait, why do you think that ANY kind of compressor would need hydraulic oil?
acertainjenesaisquoi
I meant lubricating oil. Twas' a Freudian slip as I had been working with hydraulic systems all day.
alymurt
I wasn't going to sign into imgur today.... alas your wit required my upvote
equityforpunks
And god doesn't make world a better place. People do with their actions. People like atheists, Christians, Muslims, gays, whites, blacks etc
ColonelObvious
Yup. I'm one of those things, and many of the others hate me for that reason only
gigawatts2000
The difference between Christianity and Churchianity.
Ttoften
You sir, should make it an effort to make all religious nutbags convert to the church of the compressor god
nofate65
Anybody go to a church every Sunday, but openly not "belonging" to that church?
Arceus
Can't hurt to try.
zattack
Directions unclear. Dick stuck in compressor
Corona688
Compressors do not work that way.
Popspoppingit
Challenge accepted.
CanadianTuxedo
Finally an analogy that makes sense to me.
Rickbot
My friend used to be addicted to brake fluid, but he said he knew when to stop
Xanju
fuck you I do what I waascasssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
blackguard89
ಠ_ಠ... I'm not sure that that's the best comparison, but okay.
TooFastTim
I been drinking t for years wondering when that shit was gonna start working
thotsandprers
Did you try being a compressor? Really. I wanna know.
Yuriee
Truer words have seldom ever been typed.
FabricatiDiemPvnc
shit...i should probably call poison control
acertainjenesaisquoi
Trust ne when I say you're 20 minutes too late for that.
Snowdemoman
Well, when you go to church, pray to god and even praise him for what he does for you, you're getting pretty close to being Christian.
CitizenPrime
as a compressor, i can confirm.
MmMerrifield
Drinking compressor lubricants might though...
Funlovingsociopath
I love your comment, and wish I could favourite somehow.
SomeImgurianProbably
I CAN HAVE DREAMS
justinekeller
Logged in just to upvote 'cause man, this is some serious analogy mastery over here
howlongcantheimgurusernamesevenge
As a christian, thank you. I see waay too many retards who think that going to church makes them better than everyone else. gettin tired (1)
howlongcantheimgurusernamesevenge
Of that being what everyone thinks a "Christian" is.
Gnoevoet
So what, in your opinion, makes one a Christian?
acertainjenesaisquoi
Following christian values, generally being a decent person etc.et c.
Gnoevoet
There's Christians that are good people, there's Christians that are bad people, same goes for atheists or other religions.
Gnoevoet
So if I have good values and am a decent person, I'm a Christian, even if I don't believe in their (or any) God?
acertainjenesaisquoi
You're trying to take this string of comments out of the initial topic of the post. Basically some people claim to be christian but aren't.
melancholyterminator
I like that, you took the box and went right outside it lol!
acertainjenesaisquoi
I was going to go with the whole car andgarage metaphor, butt fuck it, got mix shit up sometimes.
melancholyterminator
Ya made it more interesting, when in doubt, aim to confuse stupid people
Imorteus
mtilley
Someone needs to embroider this on a pillow! Stat!
Icantbebothered
Going to church and believing in God makes you a christian. But being religious doesn't make you a good person.
acertainjenesaisquoi
True, but the post was about christians not being good people but still believing that they are in fact good christians.
MmMerrifield
It might make you pretty jacked though...
evilpilch
No, but being a Christian does make you deluded. - hey, don't shoot me! Just my opinion. (plus it's true). ;D
acertainjenesaisquoi
It's not true. As an Atheist, I couldn't give a shit about what religion someone is. It all depends on how they act.
evilpilch
believing in fairies?
NocturnalDaedra
Unfortunately most of the "Christians" are like this, making us protestants look bad because people are so ignorant that they don't know 1)
NocturnalDaedra
2) the difference.
DaenerysTargaryenTheFirstOfHerNameKhaleesiOfTheGreatGrassSea
Well fucking said. I like you.
jmoneyawyeah
My friends say I'm addicted to drinking brake fluid, but I can stop anytime I want
SpoonOfDoom
I was addicted to drinking soap, but I'm clean now.
iliketokeepitsimplestupid
Are you a master or a mere slave?
rkbill92
Holy shit, that floored me
orp0piru
Side effect: red flashing ass
BobifferJones
I prefer headlight fluid myself.
teddddddyyyyyyyd
Id like to be around you on a gloomy night
MOTHERFUCKINGBOBROSS
You must be a bright one.
britishdilettantejimmyrustlerbutmostlyokguy
Go easy on that stuff Gavin.
TheRealCJ
I can't help but feel sorry for you: One day the world is gonna put their foot down and stomp on you hard. It's gonna stop you dead.
MuayThaiwinLannister
Please stop. These puns are braking my heart.
thebrownknightrises
No no no. Let the puns car y on
teddddddyyyyyyyd
And the the puns drive on.
acertainjenesaisquoi
You made me chuckle good sir, well done.
itypedthefollowing
If you like that you should check out the rest of Steven Wright's comedy. (Makes for a great pandora station seed as well)
MrGloo
Also wanking in 3:32am every third Tuesday of the month in front of sprinklers doesn't make you a Batman
CJaddy
Well technically you can't compress hydraulic fluid as by definition fluids are non compressible lets work on those comparisons eh?
acertainjenesaisquoi
Hydraulic fluid, as in fluid that is used to transfer power in hydraulic systems. E.g. water tight door, a ram etc. etc.
CJaddy
well yea no kidding I know what it is I work with it daily. You pressurize hydraulic systems with a pump you don't compress them.
acertainjenesaisquoi
You realise that the act of pressurising something is compressing said something, yes?
CJaddy
no compression is a reduction in volume. You do not reduce the volume of hydraulic fluid in a pump you only add pressure.
CJaddy
You can in fact compress something without changing its pressure at all. Its fundamental fluid dynamics.
chloramphenicolderivative
Actually it does make you a christian, it doesn't make you a good christian.
acertainjenesaisquoi
Fair point, though we are delving into the depths of the "No True Scotsman" argument.
valjean
I agree with the distinction you're trying to make, but non-Christians can go to church. I go every Christmas to appease my mother.
Thekingofbeans
Yeah but now you're approaching the no true scotsman argument when you start to declare who is and isn't really a christian.
acertainjenesaisquoi
Yeah, true.
theheatwave2001
I don't know my stomach feels like it's compressing something!
acertainjenesaisquoi
Well it'll be expelled at a high pressure if you're lucky. If not, well better get started on your last will and testament.
uneasyboosh
well not with that attitude! http://imgur.com/ZchQh8l
TheLivinLegend
Heh. Boosh.
aselfdefeatingattitude
I like to call it Lost Wages!
CthulianDreams
Also, being a Christian doesn't make you a good person.
twitfgfor
*calling yourself a Christian doesn't make you a good person.
CanadianTuxedo
Ooooo so edgy
Zerubbabel
Only if you have a very loose definition of what it means to be Christian.
valjean
Not really. Being a Christian does not entail being a GOOD Christian.
Zerubbabel
That becomes "No True Scotsman." One of the biggest problems with Christianity is people think they can claim the faith and not follow it
valjean
It's failing to distinguish between an X and a good X that is an instance the No True Scotsman fallacy.
TooFastTim
No It usually makes you a twat
gazettefan42
My mom needs to learn this. She only trusts Christians and will only let me go to Christian concerts because she thinks their safer.
iwanttomountndewya
they're*... i am partially not sorry. I do apologize if it was interpreted as rude. And religion (as far as I know) is suppose to be a guide
acertainjenesaisquoi
I should've added that as an addendum, thank you.
ThatJerkYouKnow
As an atheist, I'm gonna go ahead and say if somebody really WAS Christ-like (Christian?) they would be a good person by definition.
IGotOneHandInMyPocket
Christ was me like... I was a martyre before it was cool
Theodrian
"I like your Christ, but I do not like your Christians, they are so unlike your Christ."
JordanMBraz
As a Christian I can confirm this.
puffaliaz
Jesus accepted slavery, valued faith over actions, created thoughtcrime, and wanted people to abandon their families to preach. So no, wrong
Eldibs
This, so much.
ThatJerkYouKnow
Because you can't be a Christ-like hater / selfish prick. It doesn't work like that.
rectalprolapse
You are absolutely correct. Thank you for this understanding.
freshlancer
As a pastor, I say there are no good people - doesn't matter your philosophy. A Christian loves (or does good) because he was loved first.
DissidentRage
You shouldn't have to depend on other people being good to you to do good to others.
captainsciencebutt
Wait, there are literally *no* good people? So are we all assholes then? Ah well, here I thought I was doing alright.
freshlancer
Check out my response to Zalophus - he asked pretty much the same thing. Hopefully it clarifies.
Zalophus
That doesn't make sense. Unless you mean there are no good OR bad people because morality is relative.
freshlancer
Weird to type in bursts, and I'm leaving for a week in the morning, but if you message me, I'll happily chat when I can.
freshlancer
we all fall woefully short. That's what I mean - I don't meet the standard, which is why I need a savior.
freshlancer
Not at all - in fact, the notion that there are good people makes morality relative. If God is the standard of goodness, (1/2)
apiringLEO
if they followed the bible (not just the good stuff the pastor teaches) they would be terrible people! no rights for woman,slaves,stonings
Kingmala
That's the OT. Shits not for today yo.
Eowyneb
This is true. The bible has fucked up things. People just need to be good and loving.
ThatJerkYouKnow
I'm not sure stoning people is actually something Christ did.
apiringLEO
but he was all for beating slaves within an inch of their lives..
Harmonex
He's pointing out the difference between "the Bible" and "Christ in the Bible".
GraphicsInterchangeFormat
And being an Atheist doesn't make you a bad person for not being a Christian
Rivalyn
"The nearer the church, the further from God." - Bishop Lancelot Andrewes
acertainjenesaisquoi
You can be a devout catholic, and still be a decent person. There's no correlation between the twp, assuming that's what was meant.
KonekoToujou
I don't know what context that was in, but I've been opposed to organized religion for a long time. I don't think somebody should tell 1/2
KonekoToujou
Opposed was a somewhat bad word.
KonekoToujou
you how to interpret your preferred religions writings. 2/2