MasterRaceNASCAR
132688
8715
248
My stash of porn - Don't let your girlfriend see
Mar 11, 2016 2:37 AM
MasterRaceNASCAR
132688
8715
248
gorgeousninja
Hello, I'd like the best way to become obese with severe heart disease please.
shitypics
Hipster burgers
SvenPek
Gross......
Zokathra
I'd fight for you Kaleesi.
AMIGARA
I sent this to my girlfriend immediately, she'll be getting off to this just as much as me.
super3dcow
In the second pic, the 12 is actually a !2
dunbarfever
That's the best $50 I ever spent on a burger
thyshields
Sigh *unzips*
Looneytunechi
My brother
chicmagnetwampa1
You can fuck right off with 100% of these nasty things
dougsfriendskeeter
I would ride this stash so hard
ErinFromTheOffice
You had me at Porknado
MrLemmings
So like 85% of the way through?
sickpanda
But what if the gf is the one who cooks?! :o
AboutAGirlNamedPony
But...but... I am a gf, and I want it too!
KharnApproves
DC Brau.... my god I miss that beer.
ConsumerOfStories
I think I gained 6 pounds just reading this...
haddermeatmah
I'm at the gym looking at these. Unfair.
DustyFan
Anyone hungry for some meat? If you know what I mean.
Samsquantch82
The fuck is a "crispy dinosaur kale patty?" That just sounds obnoxious.
SadyeChester
Crispy kale chips infused burger patty I'm guessing
Equinox13
Dinosaur kale is a type of kale, so I assume it's crispy patty with that kind of kale in it. Sounds gross to me, but I don't like kale.
HaveYouMetMyFriendTherapy
Your girlfriend wants it too.
bud467
Oh sweet jesus.
rainbowpantalones
The guy who decided to put a runny fried egg on a burger needs an award. So good. *salivates*
PangolinBan
Nothing wrong with a runny fried egg. But a "sous-vide cooked egg yolk" is just taking the piss.
LootHoarder
DC Brau! Yeaaaa.
cheeseburgerheaven
I'm finally relevant!
UrsaUrsa
A good cheeseburger IS heaven!
GoodNewsCigaretteJuice
Cross-sections!! We need cross-sections!!
VonSnootingham
Yes, let me go to my pantry and grab my shaved summer truffle, ground rabbit, and...sazerac roux? What the hell even is that last one?
Anarric
Bob's Burgers in real life!
kurtist04
Bob Belcher?
dephress
What the hell is a French fry bun? And why has no one explained to me sooner?
MyNameIsDanAndIDontKnowWhatIDidToYouPeople
Bob Belcher would be proud of these names
stylinchilibeans
Came here to say the same!
PedroBenecol
Came here to say first the same, but ended up saying I was about to say the same to you.
PedroBenecol
(dunno whether that made any sense, but whatever)
stylinchilibeans
We need to go deeper...
pepsifan11
I wouldn't say no to any of these if they were put in front of me. But if I'm making a burger I wouldn't go to all the trouble of these.
mykneesaremeatarmsspaghetti
I feel like a pretentious asshole just reading these
GeneralCaptainCrunch
Honestly, I feel like most of these aren't even burgers, just really big fucking sandwiches.
Icreatedthisaccounttoupvoteyourcomment
Bonus: it's grass-fed, so it must he healthy for you!
pepsifan11
I'm pretty sure that's how it works.
Duder87
For some reason I was craving a whopper with cheese while looking at these.
TheWallpaperMaker
I'll stick with my onions, tomatoes, and avocado please.
IAmThePermabannedAccountOfMyNameIsMrTorgue
Yeah, this is "foodie" bullshit. Let those cunts pay $30 for a mediocre "fancy" burger.
tolkiennerd36
I agree some of these don't even look good
RowsdowerMobile72
I didn't think burgers could be this fucking pretentious... shaved summer truffle with foie gras cognac cream sauce?
iwearlittlesocks
You'd change your mind if you've ever had one. Once and a while, a gourmet burger will change your life
IAmThePermabannedAccountOfMyNameIsMrTorgue
Breaking my jaw off really would be life-changing, you're right!
GeraldsNinjaStar
And with all of those ingredients, it'll be hard to decipher any real depth or nuance anyway.
missbelled
I don't think depth or nuance were high on the list of considerations for these. Never did care for overloaded, "inspired" pantry mashups.
sheanar
These are pretty silly, but a little effort can make an epic burger out of a mundane one. Things like flavoured mayo or smoked cheddar 1/2
sheanar
2/2 will do amazing things. So does mixing up the meat. Grilled pork burgers are all aces even served on white bread slices.
TossedSaladsandScrambledEggs
Come cook for me lol
pepsifan11
I agree.
IAmThePermabannedAccountOfMyNameIsMrTorgue
Some of it is even too thick to eat. For fuck's sake, if an average person can't get it in their mouth without spraying it everywhere...
chrisjfinlay
Use a 15-20% fat mince, thin patty, cook quickly - lovely colour on the outside, cooks too quickly to lose moisture from inside.
saloneju
You don't eat this shit without cutlery. I'm sorry brother, someone had to say it.
chrisjfinlay
There's a horrible trend to thicker patties these days. I like a thinner patty that cooks quickly over a very high heat
JusticusMcMaximus
.....That's what she said.... Sorry, I'll leave
shesmydisease
I can't believe it took 5 replies for someone to point out the obviously sexual nature of this comment.
missbelled
I have a similar problem.
missbelled
In bed.
whenimgurlimitsyourusernameto63charactersandyouhavetopausemidse
You just had to go and make it sexual, didnt you!
IAmThePermabannedAccountOfMyNameIsMrTorgue
Classic.