PostcardsToHeaven
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180
Nov 2, 2017 5:32 PM
PostcardsToHeaven
186604
4241
180
storytaletime
Ugh, I can't stand when guys are all "let down your walls" "don't be afraid of relationships". News flash, that's not why I'm not interested
BrazilianThunderPanda
DangerousNoodle
Every time I let a good guy help me out or give me a compliment, he then gets pissed when I tell him I'm engaged.
DangerousNoodle
So if you want women to appreciate more good guys, tell the bad ones we're not all free pieces of meat. I know where the door is.
MySpiritAnimalisBillMurray
Fucking creepy.
imooforyou
I'm sure that's every woman's thought when he approaches. Stupid women enjoying the company of men they are actually interested in. Sad!
GGertie
Too often those “favors” come with an expectation of a return favor. So yeah, offer, but don’t be offended or an asshole if we say no
Taxicat
This. Women are not vending machines that spit out sex when you insert kindness.
TheGreatPeru
The cringe
Arock77
MF every time I see posts that remind me neckbeards exist.
Arock77
Ugh. Also this
DelightfullyOdd
"Nice guys" fucking ruined the phrase for genuinely affable dudes everywhere.
GigavoltFox
"Don't let some jerk tell you what to think, let ME tell you what to think"
kkanne20
lol
sozensloth
"I'm not a jerk, I'm a nice guy, so I must know what you want more than you do!"
ChoochyMcGee
Scrolled to make fun of people defending this guy. Pleasantly surprised there aren't really any.
gdex86
I do all those things for women all the time and they never seem to mind. Maybe because I never want anything in return for such niceities.
Comegetyoursupper
kief87
kissmyassets
I want someone who stands up for themselves. Doesn't kiss my feet and say "ok. Your right".
VetteofSD
Damn that's a whole new level of desperate...
InternationalPhoneticAlphabet
"new" oh, you sweet summer child ..
gorillaClutch
the tape even has a little tipped flap like a mini-m'lady
Qualtagh
Doesn't sound like a reaction to social media. It sounds like a reaction to being told off for harassing all the women in an apt. complex
smashsouls
Knock knock. “Door to door penis salesman!”
Hammertulski
Pleasant evening chat = let me tell you why you're shit without me. Carry your groceries = let me find out where you live. Etc.
KZDM
Pleasant evening chat = you entertain my desire for your attention. Carry your groceries = earn credit for you liking me 1/2
KZDM
Because I like you, so if you don't give me attention or let me earn sex credits for being a nice guy, I'll complain about it
Hammertulski
"I moved that super-heavy box of mandarin oranges for you, which you clearly couldn't do by yourself. WHY CAN I NOT SMASH?!"
GODDAMNlT
who buys mandarin oranges by the boxload?
Hammertulski
Is this not common in other parts of the world? They sell 5lb boxes of mandarins and clementines here in the Northwest every season.
somenerandom
I don't know, but it's 1am and I want oranges now. Fuck.
wrackspurts
"help you be less afraid of the world" oh jesus dude wtf only thing I'm afraid of are people who think I need saving
Timeandrelativedimensionsinspaghetti
So what I'm hearing is keep not taking no for an answer?
vampirepenguin
And you stare at me in your Jesus Christ pose
GuardsmanMiku
"Fuck you, fuck all women, here's 95 reasons why"
KobeBurger
5NoteHalf
The writer of this piece of... we'll be charitable and say this essay - is NOT a nice person.
SithariChaos
Lets be mean, and call him a dick.
5NoteHalf
If I were going to be mean I'd go one further and call him a misogynistic, self-centered, socially inept, entitled, emotionally stunted dick
pigeonkitty
I once had to break up with a guy because all he did was compliment me. Any conversation attempt he would turn around into more flattery.
checkoutmypearlywhitesraaaaaaaarrrr
You’re really great for adding to this conversation. I bet you’re great at a lot of stuff.
ChimiFuckinChanga
Like... every single conversation?
SocialMediaMakesUsLessSocial
That honestly sounds like the best "problem" you could ever have in a relationship.
Equinox13
Not really. You can never have a meaningful deep conversation if every answer is just a compliment, and the compliments start feeling empty.
Dragongirl7256
Yeah.. my boyfriend is usually super honest EXCEPT when it comes to my art. Everything is amazing.. I don't want to be told that 1/
Dragongirl7256
It's perfect; I want an outside eye to help catch what I've fucked up on. Same thing with clothes; if I look like a pile 2/
Dragongirl7256
Of garbage in that particular outfit; let me know. I'm asking your opinion cuz it matters to me; not because I wanna hear only good things 3
perlsucks
Could you imagine telling him he is only a friend after six months of being nice to him?
TheresnoDanaonlyZuul
ifuckdragons
You'd have to start over in a new city with a new name
passbi
I am dying . Is this mother fucker Martin Luther.
IAmMrfish
passbi
Omg lol the original.
gooddayforsoup
What does a nice guy bring besides being nice? Some guys get girls not because they're jerks, but despite their being jerks.
MeezerStandardTime
But... but... they just TOLD you that they are a nice guy. So why won't you go out with them?
somenerandom
Most cases, IMHO. Despite what some idiots seem to think, hardly anybody except for really damaged individuals is actually attracted to>
somenerandom
jerkiness itself. It's just something many people choose to overlook in favor of more desirable traits the person posesses, be it great>
somenerandom
life prospects, the mindblowing orgasms they give or something else entirely, usually something that affects people on an emotional level.
gooddayforsoup
For sure! That’s what I meant to convey. Being a jerk may coincide with traits that attract others, but is not actually a draw in itself
CrazyMrowLady
"I'm a nice guy so FUCK YOU FOR NOT WANTING MY DICK."
Anarric
Being a "nice guy" ie being a respectable adult is saying "Have a nice night" but thinking "it's okay if you don't want my D I'll find one">
Anarric
>"Who does..with blackjack and hookers!"
ScoutMedic
So true nice guys are secretly the most angry
GoldenSun3DS
This stereotype is why I'd never want to call myself a nice guy or have someone call me that.
Talvieno
What about a schmott guy?
Memaleph
When a girl told me I'm a nice guy, was it because I didn't jump on her or because she wanted me? I'll never know.
GoldenSun3DS
Probably because she meant it as "nice person", like you'd say to your grandma.
APackOfExcitedGingers
But I really hate this stereotype because you should be able to have a positive opinion about yourself without people assuming youre a creep
BleachItsWhatsForDinner
This is a cringe test. There are plenty of nice, positive guys out there that are still cringing at this. Oh, and 100% of the women too.
mostlysalt
There's a difference between being a nice guy and being the "im *nice* so why won't women sleep with me, those vindictive bitches"-guy
SuperiorPosterior
I do consider myself a nice guy, but I ain't lookin' for somewhere to slip my dick. I just don't want to be called sexist when I hold a >>
dasmoons
Has anyone actually done this though? I've lived almost thirty yrs and have never witness anyone call someone sexist for holding a door open
CrazyMrowLady
I'm British. It's practically illegal not to here.
SuperiorPosterior
Does it happen often? No, but often enough. When I worked at a bakery a woman called the cops saying I was a rapist for repeatedly asking >>
dasmoons
/r/talesofretail that's just customer service. Every worker gets treated like they're the worst.
SuperiorPosterior
Yeah, but when you end up in a stand-off where you feel the only way your side of the story will be believed is by recording it, and >>
SuperiorPosterior
Her to stop trying to open the CLEARLY marked "EMPLOYEES ONLY, PLEASE" case. Because that's kinda what I'm there for, working at a bakery.
SuperiorPosterior
Door open, ESPECIALLY since I do it for anyone, young, old, man, woman, attack helicopter, flubber... I don't care what you are, I legit >>
IWantedOneOfThoseLongUsernamesTooSoIGotOne
So you're the one who keeps letting in all the attack helicopters.
SuperiorPosterior
Like I said, you do you. I just wanna be me, too.
IWantedOneOfThoseLongUsernamesTooSoIGotOne
Well I'd like to be me, but it's hard when I'm busy dodging strafing runs from these damn attack helicopters!
SuperiorPosterior
Just wanna be nice for the sake of nice, it's what I was goddamn raised to do, and why I love working retail. Being nice is my happy place >
SuperiorPosterior
And keeps me from feeling depressed and suicidal, so having the cops called on me for replying when a kid says "good morning" at the bus >
SuperiorPosterior
Stop just kinda makes me feel all kinds of shitty. Do I LOOK creepy or something???
Harryurhandsrfreezing
Caspooky
To be honest, I wouldn't want to eat a random ground-hotdog either...
Omegarighteous
Memaleph
I thought it was the joke
Lollothe98
It was... he got whoosh'd
Caspooky
Whooshed hard, indeed.
RiskItForATotalBiscuit
That's the joke
ahintaclue
Isn't this what those women do anyways? Hookup with random people
Hyippy
I don't get your username, there are no scorpions made out of walnuts?
Caspooky
But there are walnuts made out of scorpions ;)
Schrod1ngersCaT1701
Eaglemk4
Coward
captbigmansteve
LET ME FOLLOW YOU TO YOUR CAR.
ImguriansFillMySaltReservoir
WHAT DO YOU MEAN GET OUT OF YOUR APARTMENT, I'M OPENING THE DOOR FOR YOU!
shyxander
It's so condescending, he assumes he knows what women want and even says that they don't know they're own feelings.
HuHuDuDa
it's their. and english isn't even my first language. apart from that, you are right.
Kolkorro
myloveforyouislikeatruckberserker
Its so super hard watching them fall... if only they listened!
JefferyJeffington
Their
Ivain
I mean, if he wants to give them advice so badly, he should just go up to them and TALK to them... I've done this, it works.
FlatPlutoSociety
"Look, I read a really convincing article on Reddit about what you cunts want, so just let me fucking love you already, will you?"
CabNumber1729
I like the idea that be nice is a selling point. Its like putting 'being able to read' on a cv. Yer I'd assume that, its a standard trait.
barnwolf
He's only assuming he knows what they don't want. And it's "their" not "they're".
KhajiitHasWaresIfYouHaveUpvotes
But he watches so much anime! He must know what women want?!!
Allofyoush
*unhealthily high pitched anime girl giggle*
DragonPirates
L E W D
SocialMediaMakesUsLessSocial
Careful, you could trigger all of USSRsub with that comment.
BarryInTheStreetsOliverInTheSheets
Aside from coming off as a colossal douche, is anything this dude said inaccurate? Do women not want those things?
BarryInTheStreetsOliverInTheSheets
So its not untrue, he's just a whiny bitch for bringing it up, and bringing it up the way he did
egbertmoxie
It's the presumptions inherent within. And frankly, I don't often want strangers in my business when shopping, male or female.
westwood8183
Not from some random thirsty dude, no.
inwatermelonsugar
yeah you really can't say condescending shit to 50% of the population to manipulate them into dating your lonely ass
StellarJay77
To be fair many women don’t say what they mean initially (even if they are interested) for fear of being “too easy” or a “slut”
votress
right? "help you be less afraid of the world" i ain't afraid of shit, we're not all delicate feminine flowers that need mollycoddling -
RoxanneLaWin
If I'm afraid of anything, it's the mentality that Nice Tokens Spent = Sex And Love Reward.
votress
regardless of relationship history.
RenegadeSci
*Their
BetaTester112
Unless, of course, said women actually are feelings and don't even know it
RenegadeSci
I am ashamed of myself. It's the first time I've given rather than received.
MasterMookie
It is good we need to correct it even if people get butthurt or eventually ouer languageagqeg ice goonn dai
Isweartogodthecatmademedoit
bobtheaxolotl
I went through this phase when I was maybe 14, minus the fedora. But then, I grew the fuck up. No one's obligated to be attracted to anyone.
Frazzledragon
Except for magnets.
FlatPlutoSociety
Yeah. I think every guy has a "women are dumb and only like jerks" phase. If you're not over it by the end of high school, you have issues.
bobtheaxolotl
A lack of confidence is a part of the problem. "No one wants nice guys" generally means "I'm too scared of rejection to approach women."
StellarJay77
Or they are just not interested in playing the initial rejection game some women play so they don’t appear “too easy”.
Dragongirl7256
The only ones who play that game are either incredibly immature or batshit insane so.. I mean take that as a warning sign?
StellarJay77
Agreed, but I also know several normal ones who just grew up ultra conservative who were conditioned to deny 1st advances even if interested
bobtheaxolotl
The other thing I've improved at is recognizing red flags, I think. Got a lot of experience with a stalker, and with a borderline S/O.
madnessfromthesea
This!! This so much!! for both sexes!!
konamihatchibori
I am a woman. I actually find this comforting. There are so many women looking for stability in all the wrong places.
CrazyMrowLady
And you think a guy getting angry over the fact you're dating another man is stable?
dasmoons
Really? This makes me think there's a future serial killer in the area.
konamihatchibori
I meant the commentary. I think the fact that it's duck tapped and printed out is super creepy xD
dasmoons
The "fine suffer I know what's best and you're an impertinent child who should be with me" is the creep part. Like Frolo from disney's HBoND
konamihatchibori
*Duct
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
Women want a partner. An equal. Not a follower or worshipper. Fucking idiots.
[deleted]
[deleted]
DJNinja
Keyword here is women. Girls just want to have fun.
JustOneMoose
CamelaShy
Fav argument to prove the point ... "If you wouldn't do it for a guy as well, you're not a nice guy".
Taxicat
Alternative: "if you wouldn't do it without the possibility of sex as a reward..."
JayEnfield
As a male, I too want a partner. I'm growing frustrated with my knack for attracting only ladies with zero life skills or ambitions. :(
anakhasilver
This guy isn't a worshiper of follower, either, tho. He's an abused in disguise who feels entitled to sex for being nice.
tattoogigolo
Why are you calling women idiots?
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
No, the neckbeards who think women don't like them because they are nice guys, when really they are just impossible to respect.
kushandkoolaid
treefrog
Actually, I worship my girl, and she worships me. I kinda like it.
Junktrunkjunkie
OK it's still a mutual relationship. thats pretty healthy
malakim
That's an equal relationship then though, which is thread-OPs point.
QuackDodgers
+1 for you, -1 for treefrog
Drennen
They are equal, the same, 5/7
AxelYamanaka
Okay, but how can someone be a partner if he's drunk or high all the time?
Sealcountry
Put on some taller shoes?
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
Get drunk together?
AxelYamanaka
Then who's the designated driver? Checkmate atheists
CrazyMrowLady
Jesus can take the wheel.
calenturian
Public transport, bitches! Cos the Night Rider buses are sooooo romantic
glorificateur
Just as men , but truth is, lots of women think that somehow an asshole Will fullfill that and that hurts when its obvious to us what hé is.
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
You can't know the dynamics of a relationship that doesn't involve you. Someone you think is an asshole could be perfect to someone else
LadyWidebottom
Yeah, don't put them up on a pedal stool!
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
Pedestal
LadyWidebottom
Thanks, I was making a reference.
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
Oh, ok. I just binge watched IT crowd so its all a blur.
LadyWidebottom
That's ok, time to watch it again!
minkuschild
They want someone to worship them, but still want to fuck anyone they want.
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
Believe it or not, there are guys out there who would be into that.
sleepmask
So it's been awhile huh?
TheImageDumpersCC
Who hurt you?
ilovevanhalen
I know a lot of guys like this.
Boopbeepbeep
Woman might also want someone who isn’t made bitter by past experiences.
Chemdog500
[deleted]
[deleted]
Iiar
Saltine
SarminBandit
This was never more fitting. Thanks, Satan.
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
My pleasure.
ThisIsGiraffe
Good guy Satan
KitsyBlue
What about the girls who want a guy to call daddy while he chokes her cuz that's her kink?
horrorhoe
Usually not a 24/7 dynamic and when it's not it should be an equal partnership like any vanilla relationship.
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
I guarantee that they have discussed it in depth ahead of time. Just because she likes it in one situation, doesnt mean she wants it to >
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
Intrude into every aspect of her life.
KitsyBlue
I don't think I could view someone who wants me to choke them or otherwise be submissive in bed as an equal. It seems a little ridiculous.
GIMMEAMINALSRIGHTMEOW
dogsandcatsandlemursohmy
I mean, slight amounts of worship are appreciated. But that worship must be reciprocated as well.
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
True enough. I can't really describe every aspect of a healthy relationship in 140 characters though. Have to generalize a bit.
rightwing66
No, women want a leader.
rightwing66
somenerandom
Some do. Some don't. Not all women want the same thing, but the huge majority of them do not want a doormat in human skin.
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
I wish i could give you more than one upvote. One of the most coherent comments I've seen but sadly you're buried at the bottom.
ilovevanhalen
XtraDownvote
This man is what women want
KZDM
Ask a woman what they want
rightwing66
They don't know what they want, kid
rightwing66
Which explains why they always go home and fuck the asshole leaving the nice guy to wonder what the fuck happened. Leadership
DrBuckarooBanzai
The irony is that you're a huge pussy
TheAlbatrossFromTheMoon
Found the fedora guy
noodlefloodle
Plenty of girls know exactly what they want. Maybe you’re going for the asshole girls.
somenerandom
Jesus Christ.
Dyslexicbirch
Ive known a couple of these "nice guys" most want a hot gf to replace their mother
Ketor
Exactly,well said. Jane Caro once wrote a great article about the difference between respecting women, and feeling the need to protect women
Freeflare
People want what they want. All you're doing is framing it in your positives.
MayorDeweyMayorDewey
and even then they dont want it in every man they come across. some men ARE just friends. what's so wrong with being a friend?
ilovecake
Most of my friends are men, so I totally believe men and women can just be friends without ulterior motives or desires.
astrangehop
About 10 percent of my women friends are exes, twenty gals I wanted to date, and seventy just awesome people I met.
astrangehop
If you wannna screw somebody you wouldn't be friends with that's weird, and if you can't befriend people you didn't wanna fuck that's awful.
ilovecake
I never remain friends with exes, and I don’t befriend people I want to date. People can want to fuck once based on only physical looks.
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
I hear you. You interact with many people every day, and only one can be a partner. Obligatory: unless you have more than one because>
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
An 140 character comment cannot possibly cover everyone in the human race. Damn nitpickers.
adishdelish
And who said eating from Satan’s tree of knowledge was a bad thing?
Chemdog500
Yahweh
FriendlyNeighbourhoodSatan
God. Don't trust that guy. He'll make you a demi-god, and demand perfect obedience, then create a race of talking monkeys with free will.
TresusIbor
And give them all anxiety for it.
Harryurhandsrfreezing
You fucked up a perfectly good monkey!
DenverCoderIX
I want an equal partner who worships me as his warrior goddess as we ride into battle and I take him to Valhalla, why is it so hard to find?
TorisArt
That's s really good way to put it
TysonGoesOutside
You say that. But my wife is clearly in charge.
TheDivineUsersub
She pegs you in bed, huh?
jhaney37
ManannanMacLir
Story time?
cheeseguy3412
"Pity is the death of desire" Don't be a condescending bag of rancid assholes, treat others like people instead of objects, shouldnt be hard
SocialMediaMakesUsLessSocial
Nirvana is the death of desire according to Buddhists.
cheeseguy3412
Yes, well - I mean sex, they mean everything. Slightly different context.
FlatPlutoSociety
Women don't want anything in particular. There's three and a half billion of them with all manner of wants and needs. Same goes for men.
tinybluedot5
THANK YOOUUUUU
zorock
fucking this.. some women want to be worshiped, others an equal, some to be dominated. People are different. Find your love
becausesnakesandsparklersaretheonlyonesilike
For me opposite really did attract me, I like a hill to climb and so does he. Agreed people are dif and for a good reason
FlatPlutoSociety
Exactly. Find someone who you with well with, and don't act like what works for you is what should work for everyone else.
RevengeOfThePotatomancer
Right now I just want a latte.
Drosophilamelanobastard
I like fedoras but I haven't worn one since middle school because of this stereotype. Maybe one day socially functionals can reclaim it?
zootch
Ceemcgee27
When Frank Sinatra rises again
NiHyde
I feel you, they get a bad rep because of this. It's not the hat's fault.
checkoutmypearlywhitesraaaaaaaarrrr
People who have style own it and don’t give a fuck. So stop giving a fuck and rock your fedora dude.
somenerandom
Piece of advise- stereoptypes aren't everything. I've known some cool people that have pulled out some ridiculous shit just because they>
somenerandom
like it and don't give a fuck. Of course, it's likely at least SOME people will judge you based on the stereotype, but hell, someone will>
somenerandom
always judge, so again, fuck it, you do you. As long as you can break the stereotype for people you actually communicate with, success.
somenerandom
off*
DustyMcKnuckles
A fedora or tribly can look damn fine with a tailored suit. With a printed graphic shirt and jeans? Not so much...
derpaderps
you forgot the trench coat and running shoes man, build the image properly m'lord!
Drosophilamelanobastard
agreed, but maybe there could be room for casual fedoras? probably not, but people sometimes wear more casual ties.
PendingStatistic
DH wears a fedora with jacket when it rains. Keeps his glasses dry. Key point - Hats are outerwear/functional. With jacket Take off indoors.
LieutenantGordon
A fedora isn't really a casual hat, unless you're dressed as Indiana Jones.
Drosophilamelanobastard
And unless your doing field science you shouldn't really dress that way. I get it. It just was saddening when they became super uncool.
InternationalPhoneticAlphabet
even indy wears matching shirt and pants.
DustyMcKnuckles
I see where you're coming from, but that'd be similar to wearing a tie with t-shirts and jeans. :/ Just a no go for social norms.
InternationalPhoneticAlphabet
nevermind norms, that's just not aesthetically pleasing.
ifuckdragons
How do you even wear a tie with a non-collared shirt
Drosophilamelanobastard
Yeah I have come to accept that reality. But In middle school I thought it would be the next big thing so I have like a ton...
Drosophilamelanobastard
that I haven't touched for 10 years.
leftyshuckles
You're in the same boat as those who want the mullet back. Not. Going. To. Happen.
Drosophilamelanobastard
Fedoras (with a nice outfit, not jeans) have a more robust history of being acceptable. The mullet was NEVER mainstream.
leftyshuckles
You need to do some pop culture research (and this is also why you won't ever understand trilby's becoming awesome. Ever)
leftyshuckles
Unless you mean an actual fedora, which yes with a nice suit can look OK (but still fall under stereotype scrutiny)
WeylandYutaniCorp
I read all the responses, and yours is the only one close to what I think. +1. Fedora in very specific dress occasions, yes. Trilby, never.