badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
532971
12568
466
Jan 23, 2017 1:04 PM
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
532971
12568
466
Solid5outof7
My name is Paco and I work on a rancho and make 25 dolla a day. I go see Lucy and she give me some puussy and take my 25 dolla away! Ole!
TrollHunterMacBabyFarts
I would marry him, just for the perks of having a mobile tripod..... since I'm into photography
sarkonas
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
That many no's and he'd be a lady
miakkamisfit
It was worth all of this just for hypnotoad
Crispynoodlez816
I bet he's from Nantucket
iTzAmie
brunoPilot
Want to see a massive one?
brunoPilot
Want to see a massive one?
iTzAmie
alfkla
Isn't it -5 in the end?
fatherofhooligans
I thought so first because I subtracted the first 5 inches during the description of what would happen if he asked the frog.
alfkla
Captain, you can now fly away. +1
ohidunno
There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, wiping cum from his chin...
NationalistCanadianMooseWarrior
I always heard "... As he wiped off his chin"
FiftyShadesOfMascarpone
...I'ma swing this at you! Try to duck it
FiftyShadesOfMascarpone
...today I swallowed an entire bucket
FiftyShadesOfMascarpone
...feels much better than to just tug it
ohidunno
"if my ear was a cunt then I'd fuck it!"
SiriusLeeBlack
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
Wow that's nasty
ffilm
"I can't just ship it - I truck it!"
ffilm
"I'm just gonna nip it and tuck it!"
Synai
"I'm OP and I'm such a huge faggot!"
NationalistCanadianMooseWarrior
I always heard "... As he wiped off his chin"
usernametakenisthestoryofmylife
Didn't the guy from Nantucket have brass balls that made lightning shoot out his ass when he clanged them somehow?
arewevenom
The guys cock is mostly scared forskin that he stretched with weights his penis is 8 inchs I saw a doc on him.
arewevenom
https://youtu.be/cdErdEk56fs
Schadenfreude8
welp. that may or may not have been enough internets for me today...
goldars
AdmiralJohn
I haven't heard this joke in awhiALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD
braingain
Penis enlargement ads love him
Mamotas4
https://www.youtube.com/shared?ci=E8fkEPXBh2I
AnotherVote
he has no dick :0
theportraitssecretinattackmode
Y'all are talking about the guy with a huge penis and I'm just sitting here drooling over the pic of the guy with the huge pecs.
fatherofhooligans
Where are the nipples?!
Rosebride13
lol
wellthatescalatedquickly
The guy with a 25 inch penis is real. It's 24, from what I've read on an article. I'll try to link if I can find it.
voodoochilie
umm thats ok, you dont have to.
CNNBRFIINF
It's 19in but he refuses to get a reduction so...
wellthatescalatedquickly
If he reduced it to a little under 11 inches he'd be okay, I think. I mean - maybe. I'm no expert on the matter.
wellthatescalatedquickly
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/mexican-man-says-he-has-worlds-longest-penis-and-hes-miserable_us_55e0c28ae4b0b7a963390e0 - it is 19 in.
LongCommentChainAppreciator
error 404 and the error page gave me cancer.
iLynux
Sorry for your cancer.
LongCommentChainAppreciator
Thanks b0ss
hankdogg
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/mexican-man-says-he-has-worlds-longest-penis-and-hes-miserable_us_55e0c28ae4b0b7a963390e0b
hankdogg
This link works - I didn't forget the b.
wellthatescalatedquickly
You're a life saver
KingKnee
19 inch pianist
rikm
...that de-escalated quickly...;)
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
Good try :p
JohnPaulAlonso101
Was this used in the 14th century or something? If they want to change to a girl?
lgrams98442
Be careful what you ask for!
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
I have the same problem, except, I'm just one massive prick
FallenButNotForgotten
Yeah and I bet you like being one massive prickly don't you, you double dipping bundle of sticks
WineWomenAndSong
Well I heard there's this frog...
BilldeGrasseHawkingTheArchaeologist
Are you 25 inches tall?
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
No, but I also have 25 penises
BilldeGrasseHawkingTheArchaeologist
........savage +25
skinnylikeaboss
Cool runnings reference for your screen name?
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
Yeah mon
StarfishSpencer
Ya dead mon
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
Yo sanka
Toverslak
You ded?
aneverydaychocolatestarfish
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
Everlasting dipping
Lysergian
This has unsettled my stomach.
SnowNinja93
They do say you are what you eat, right?
tipsy247
Does that guy have a 25 inch penis?
webgem23
19 actually
weenielover
Why does this post make my computer scroll halfway down the page?? Anyone else get that? It's only this post.
raidleadergutts
It was just happening with me. I just closed the tab & reopened. Seems fixed for now.
reallybigdogtrappedinamansbody
Yep this sucks. Points for everyone!
rudejohn
For those (like me) who can't scroll because of a glitch/bug, go here: http://www.funny.com/cgi-bin/WebObjects/Funny.woa/wa/funny?fn=C20J
yuugian
not on this one but, yes. happened on 4 different browsers on the one post I have seen it on so far
Opportunist
Same here! Lots of posts but not this one!
dschico
I closed and re-opened my browser and it is working for me now.
liquinas
same, can't see the rest of the post
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Same.
LalitaRose
Same... I can't read it either
degenerator
It's gone now. Probably something to do with microgravity of a YUGE unit.
Threns
It's been happening on every post for me. Refresh seems to fix it, but its irritating.
Snijder
I have it on every post, I saw somewhere that they are working on it.
88wut
No, no, no! Is it fixed yet?
WhoPaidForThisFloor
It's been happening to me every post but if you refresh the page it seems to fix it.
enderlord99
Script blocker.
ishouldhavethoughtofthisusername
They
DazzlingDork
Let's not forget he exposed himself to two underage girls
Pussowitz
This isn't as prominent as it should be....unlike his mangled, gargantuan foreskin.
tony1527
@miggypiggy
Toobadadag
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XbGJzQgsNhU
IvyWilde
Well, let me tell you what I see. I see pride! I see power! I see a bad-ass mother who don't take no crap off of nobody!- Yul Brenner
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
Well hi there ivywilde
IvyWilde
Needless to say, I love your username.
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
Thsnkyou
Rhythmaster
Classic joke retold with good effort on memes +1
Phildunfy
And thus born Caitlyn Jenner or however you spell his name
CurbSided
if Caitlyn Jenner has a 10 inch man dong. Then she should of stayed a man.
Dreamdayer
Oh yeah, tale as old as time right there.
CurbSided
its like beauty and the beast.
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
Although, I just read through it again and my English is dreadful... and I'm English!
ILikeRespondingWithWillSmithGifs
*Re-Toad..! Ah..? Ah..? I'll show myself out.
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
Ta
[deleted]
[deleted]
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
Na
dauntlessds
Junkrat makes me want to believe you're Australian!
jeeps005
bar
N3kr0z
da
Buckbeak1486
I've seen women take 25" cocks before. Granted, they belong to beings with four hooves, tail, a long neck, and neigh.
HonestyOfTheBleach
Your mom lololololo im so funny
PlantyThePlant
This sounds like something in @ElbowDeepInAHorse's area of expertise.
NovaSpartan
It's a vagina, not a clown car, bro.
danishjuggler21
That's nothing. Check out elephants mating.
etherbunny41
Wiggly fuckers, eh?
OPmakesOC
No thanks
erock111
cherypi
A cat?
HumfreeBugart
Neigh, neigh, neigh
circlebreaker
*massive fatal internal bleeding intensifies*
SalvoZero
@BestialityistheBEST
FrozenFoodGuy
You must be browsing usersub allot. That or you have a unique taste in porn my friend.
eetsumkaus
not so unique if you've been to the right places on the internet
RipOffTheBandAid
It's not that unique.. once you see Bridget the midget take a foot long in the forbidden zone you're inducted
Nikolai5
Hardly unique.
Buckbeak1486
I spend 99% of my time in Usersub, and literally never see porn of any kind. But, I do enjoy animal porn.
pgdave
Really? It normally only lasts a few seconds, but if you refresh the page, you'll eventually see it.
Buckbeak1486
Must be strictly PC, then.
LychFinderGeneral
Isn't that like super illegal?
Huldra
Wat....
spicefreak
Really? I spent an hour there and saw 3 dicks and a nipple. Now I just look at most recent most viral.
TheOneTrueDaywalker
How do people not die?
MetalRearSolidVThePhantomPeen
Oh they do. Look up 'Mr. Hands' and read his story.
gamblingpoet
Usersub is weird. Mobile game, mobile game, repost, dog fucking woman, mobile game, mobile game, repost, repost, horse porn
thelittleupvotethatcould
Do people advertise their games that much?
gamblingpoet
It isn't people advertising their games, its people looking for help on how to kill a boss in a Freemium game or something.
DotSlashNatalie
Wait what was that last one?
gamblingpoet
It happens. I never see the full pic, just thumbnails then they disappear.
IcelandicGuy
Yea reposts, they suck
DotSlashNatalie
No no the one after that.
Hammerhead777
Gross bro, gross.
VigorousButtstuff
So what you're saying is, if asked if you liked it, you'd say Neigh?
bvtthole
Don't judge until you've tried it.
chrisdafish
https://imgur.com/fCM0PlL
alsoAzrael
You're disgusting! You oughta be ashamed of yourself! Also, sauce?
ionlyhaveonetesticle
I downvoted you just to see your points go up by 2
RedClaws23
The average aroused human vagina can house an object of 9-12" without excessive discomfort.
Flyndaran
Bullshit. Considering I hit my lady's cervix with my under 6 inches. Stop pushing your complete garbage.
RedClaws23
Do you know the words anecdotal or average and what they mean in statistics?
threeblackkittens
Vagina depth and elasticity varies from woman to woman. Just because you hit her cervix doesn't mean she can't stretch to fit someone 1/
threeblackkittens
larger. How much a vagina will accommodate also depends on level of arousal and mood as well as diet and exercise. 2/2
Flyndaran
Excessive discomfort. She barely accommodates me, so that statement I refer to is still wrong.
burgerandy
Now if only I could cause a human vagina to be aroused.
imooforyou
Hm. I seriously doubt that.
RedClaws23
The same fact presented by a published OB/GYN: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/owning-pink/201104/15-crazy-things-about-lady-parts
RedClaws23
Source is a published OB/GYN: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/owning-pink/201104/15-crazy-things-about-lady-parts
MuddyMax
Childbirth is usually excessive on the discomfort
GingersAreMyWeakness
There's a really big difference between 9" and 12"
gbombuh
It's about 3"
RedClaws23
Very true, however the size and elasticity of a vagina varies from woman to woman as well as based on diet, fitness, and mood.
GingersAreMyWeakness
While that is true, it also seems that this is a synonym for "can house an object of 10.5" without excessive discomfort
WhatInSamHellIsAPuma
Depth I'm assuming? It probably depends how far away her cervix is from the opening.
threeblackkittens
The cervix can stretch farther back from the vaginal opening when a woman is properly aroused. Vaginas are quite elastic.
WhatInSamHellIsAPuma
Having one, I know how elastic mine gets at least.
PleaseNotTheFace
Sarah Jessica Parker?
shooter45
Shes not a horse. Shes a donkey witch.
Buckbeak1486
Don't insult Donkeys, you ass!
Buckbeak1486
No! She is far uglier than any horse!
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
She can take 30
ImgurPremiumAccount
in her nose...
Youareobscure
and give 5 more
ImguriansFillMySaltReservoir
I've seen men take that before.
Shabado
Gotta give you a hand for that one Mr
Cerapocalypse
Underrated.
Buckbeak1486
Men, actually allow the Stallion to mount and thrust. Women don't most of the time, and it sucks!
ilove2offroad
First of all it's 19 inches long, and 6 inches of it is actual penis the rest is just skin... check your facts sir!!!
iamthisguy247
Actually 18.9: http://www.peanutdaily.com/2017/01/this-man-has-worlds-biggest-manhood-19.html?m=1
JohnnyricoMC
Dude's been hanging weights off his foreskin since he was a kid. Cheater doesn't have a superwang, he's got a trunk.
BoschJunkie
Should we be worried on how you're so educated on this? Show us on the doll where he touched you.... *holds out doll*
badassmuthawhodonttakenocrapoffanobody
Hey, this is literally, not a literal story... literally!
CopiousAmountsofForeskin
Would you say he has copious amounts of skin ?
2centaday
From that statement you could tell he had a little penis
capughe
wait so the measurement is base to end of foreskin, not tip?
ilove2offroad
I wasn't there for the measuring. So sorry I couldn't help you
BlueStringsAttached
Listen here fucko...
VeryMoistTowelettes
6-7 inches FLACCID. He's still be hung like a horse if they cut off all of the extra foreskin
Sparru
It doesn't work like that. Some are showers and others are growers. Your flaccid length can literally be the same as erect.
VeryMoistTowelettes
Still a 6-7 inch flaccid penis is much larger than most men