AskMeQuestionsaboutStarWars
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Sep 19, 2017 9:24 PM
AskMeQuestionsaboutStarWars
174345
3544
81
DrScienceface
Tracking bandits that fled on horse; crit fail roll...false alarm guys, these are just very large squirrel tracks, not horses
CPatricoo
I found a scroll and couldnt decypher it. Party spent 15 minutes trying to figure out why. Turns out barbarians cant read.
OriginDelta
My half elf friend tried and succeeded at seducing a nature goddess. She gave him a short bow because she was unsatisfied with the sex
lovejoyrat1
I got rid of the classic 'rats in the basement' by casting fly on them. Insisted I get paid while flying rats terrorized the neighborhood
Sekolah
They breed at an alarming rate..
Leonidas55
My party has a policy that if any magic item talks, we ditch it. No questions asked. I'm a dwarf fighter/cleric with an ac of 28. Im 1/?
Leonidas55
The only one who can constantly withstand being attacked by my party's crazy taking weapons. If it talks. Ditch it.
WeAreTheMadnessAndSanityIsOurFailure
My group (me, my the DM and his wife) playing Horde of the Dragon Queen. After fending off the dragon attacking the town, sold
WeAreTheMadnessAndSanityIsOurFailure
dragon insurance. Convinced the army attacking the kobolds were planning a coup, got promoted and am a battalion commander.
WeAreTheMadnessAndSanityIsOurFailure
Still have to figure out how to con the village into giving away arms and food to the army that attacked them.
FlyingGiantElk
My group found a chest, so I threw a skelly at it. Then I threw the Druid at it, which bit her. That's how I got someone killed via mimic.
Melanisia
Rolled a Crit while being eaten by a dragon..... ripped out it's uvula, and made a bag of holding from it.
NakedAssassin
Tonight our druid "accidentally" completely filled a room with owls.
weirdipedia
I let one of my players come from a place we had not established in the narrative yet. He introduced himself in a Boston accent and kept it.
tygaclaw
One time in Pathfinder after a major encounter we were offered just about anything in reward, most of us chose simple objects like money (1)
tygaclaw
But our slightly insane fighter wanted the Giant Boar of the officer who was giving out our rewards. (The boar & officer were high lvl) (2)
tygaclaw
The (asshole) GM was a little peeved off at something that happened earlier and decided to have the officer be a petty ass and kill the boar
tygaclaw
Sadly for him, i was a necro-occultist and wanted to revive the boar, so he maimed it. I had reconstruct corpse. We got our pig. (4/4)
HereIGoLurkingAgain
I never could get into D&D very well. Don't have enough people.
capthammerreynolds
look for online games roll20 certainly supports it but i would got to dndbeyond.com first and learn at least the basic rules
theruggbeast
We were captured and in jail cells with nothing but rat poop and hay. I decided to make methane bombs to blow the lock and rolled a nat 20
theruggbeast
That broke the campaign and my DM had to rewrite half of it. She wasn't too happy about it. Apparently we weren't supposed to escape
AntonioStark
Two solutions. Be more flexible or have better plot armor for crucial events like this. Yes you escaped, however you also blew a hole 1/2
AntonioStark
Through the adjacent orphanage and the town hates you. Back to prison you go! 2/2
2074red2074
Better solution: DC 30 locks.
AntonioStark
Nope. My wife had a +21 to bluff after a few months.
Daddygeek84
Or just add locked gates and competent guards in the hallway.
TheMusicSnob
I was playing a game when a warrior grab a charcoal rolled a 20 and burnt through a goblins head, he took the skull and wore it
johobopo
one of the party members sent her familiar (a small snake) to my character. It had a note tied to it with info i needed. I couldn't read.
Sharkostomy
I successfully dual-wielded corpses. I did not successfully hit anything.
JellyFuckingBeans
@KingOfBees
SkeletonRecruiter
Used to play an easily distracted halfling who spent an entire fight stabbing a river with a dagger. The party almost drowned her after...
SkeletonRecruiter
My next char was a sorceress who used a spell to make ppl shit themselves, then figured out how to make them UNshit themselves. Good times
ItsNotMyCakeDay
A displacement beast was gona kill me and I shouted "ANYTHING BUT THE CHESTPLATE" and rolled a natural 20 so it waited for me to take it off
SirSmurfalot
Why were you worried about your chestplate?
ItsNotMyCakeDay
It was a goofy time. I got that chestplate in the previous boss fight and i treated it like a new car (and being stupid about it) 1/2
ItsNotMyCakeDay
And i didnt want it to get scratched. Turns out when i took it off i almost got one hit and my friends got mad at me for being stupid :)
SurpriseFatGuy
but then the chestplate was safe
ItsNotMyCakeDay
Exactly. They didnt appreciate it like i did.
nordicfatcheese
There was one game where a player had a pet dragon that could breath healing fire. It was young though so it got healing fire and normal 1/?
nordicfatcheese
fire confused sometimes so if he rolled low the dragon did damage instead. Boss was almost dead and he was last man standing with only 2/?
nordicfatcheese
the ability to use his heal left. Boss would have killed him next turn. So he healed the boss, rolled a 1, and killed it with his heal. 3/3
TheKholdOne
One time, my party left the first town with equipment, information, a relic, and more money than we had started with. The DM was pissed.
abeardedblacksmith
The knob-gobblin' hobgoblin got me good.
TairaMai
"There once was a fighter and a goblin all alone out on the trail..."
mastshin
And his name was Bobbin.
Krowmatic
Vaccer
Agnew521
Finally my name is relevant again!
kittyanya
Nothing says fun like my mage getting drunk and her owl familiar crashing into the bar windows because they had the link.
KnightsAgainstOrganizedSeriousness
How do other's deal with friends who always playing "Oh, my character hates people" character? Or the each turn takes 10 min person?
NivalisAngelus
Send them on solo missions. Your DM needs to be fairly good at multitasking for this but it can shut down that behaviour when they have
NivalisAngelus
To deal with an encounter on their own or have to deal with NPCs without the party to clean up their messes. Or it goes horribly wrong.
Shitzamboni
Force that friend to deal with people to see how he reacts.
KnightsAgainstOrganizedSeriousness
"I walk out and ignore them" or "I sit there, fuming angrily and don't respond" is generally the reaction. She almost was a person last game
KnightsAgainstOrganizedSeriousness
by adopting a child, but changed her mind and abandoned it immediately next session
Spacebread
1. Don't invite assholes into the party. 2. Welcome to D&D.
zacnotes
I cut loose a couple bug bears and let them run off. I later walked through a door without doing any kind of checks. Full of bug bears.
austinyc
Was that an Adventure Zone or MLP reference?
zacnotes
acted like I was happy to see the them , and was checking in after having 'saved' them. Had some bug bear beer and walked out alive.
Iceman0624
That’s fucking hilarious
TurtlesAndBacon
An owl bear once stumbled into our camp while I was keeping watch. I crit on an Animal Friendship roll and it ended up loving me. It 1/
TurtlesAndBacon
Joined us for the rest of the adventure we were on and helped us in combat. Afterwards, I braided a charm into his hair and 2/
TurtlesAndBacon
Turned him loose. His name was Beary, and I like to think he has found happiness.
xristogur
did you have that bugbearbeer at a bugbearbar
Onlyhereforthelaughs
Did you say BUGBEAR? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jLYNP0A5yqU
DickMercenary
Linking to anything pony related on Imgur? Brave. Likely to be downvoted to hell and back. But brave.
Onlyhereforthelaughs
I've had surprising luck with it lately. I go in fully expecting death, but I find I still have points in the morning.
Onlyhereforthelaughs
It's like the world is changing... Or nobody sees my fucking comments.
DickMercenary
Crazy times we live in..
JustAnotherLinkInTheChain
One time I was playing as a sun worshipping paladin inspired by Solaire. My buddy a goblin hating ranger. We busted through a door and
JustAnotherLinkInTheChain
Slaughtered all who attacked. The remaining one (was already bound pre encounter) said in goblin (which only the ranger could understand):
SurpriseFatGuy
"Snape killed Dumbledore" and was promptly executed for his dedication to spoilers
JustAnotherLinkInTheChain
Nice try, but Imgur keeps deleting my comment
HowToBeSuccessfulAsaSerialKiller
"The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell", but I didn't understand and killed him, setting back science a thousand years.
JustAnotherLinkInTheChain
Shit that's good. No, but my comment keeps getting deleted. Probably because it refers to sun worshippers as bundles of sticks
TheAuthorOfTheJournalsMyBrother
Said what? SAID WHAT??
JustAnotherLinkInTheChain
Check it again. Maybe it got deleted last time
Jonokiwi
I got a story, so my group was dungeon crawling and came to a room with a Succubus disguised as a Moon Elf. 1/?
Jonokiwi
And I being the Sun High Elf Wizard, wanted to flirt with her to get information, cus obviously my group was suspicious. 2/?
Jonokiwi
I rolled an 18 for persuasion with a flirty pick up line "Girl, are you a Moon Elf? Cus you're causing my tides to rise!"
Jonokiwi
With that success, we got some info of how she got here...which was half true. But since she's a Succubus, she turned the charm on me and
Jonokiwi
Cast a Charm spell on me, turning me against my group! So shit hit the fan and the half-orc barbarian of our group swung the first hit 4/?
capthammerreynolds
As a high elf you should have advantage against charm. That's some bad luck.
Jonokiwi
On her. So long story short, the barbarian had to beat the charm spell out of me, while also getting charmed at the same time. Fun times!
notalurker777
One time I was the last guy left alive in my party against a bandit party (a wolf and thw chief were left) and having broken my spear in 1/2
notalurker777
A crit fail I grabbed the wolf and swung it like a mace and killed the chief. After which I rolled a nat 20 to tame the wolf. I then 1.5/2
notalurker777
Continued through the campaign with a pet wolf that doubled as my mace. His name was Mason
Iceman0624
“Pet Wolf that doubles as my mace” holy fuck lmao
SirSmurfalot
It would have been funny to do it once, but it is stupid to do as a running gag.
FSB75
For the uninitiated, the game of D&D may seem too "geeky", but trust me, some amazing stories and you learn a LOT about friends.
WhiteCollarOfficeJobs
To be honest, I actually find it the opposite. Definitely a generalization, but I find some DnD players to be really boasty about it.
TheShootpark56
I've been wanting my group of friends and I into it but have no idea how to get it all started, any tips?
SurpriseFatGuy
Shoot me a pm, I'll try to set you guys up a game to play so that nobody has to stress about being the DM for your first experience.
FSB75
Some games are streamed on Twitch, just search "D&D". From there you can see ALL types of games, but get an overall feel.
revcleo
Watch some streams/vids as well, there's Critical Role, High Rollers, The Adventure Zone, Acquisitions Incorporated
AskMeQuestionsaboutStarWars
There's a $10 starter pack you can buy, it includes a story, pre-made character sheets, guides on how to play it and such.
AskMeQuestionsaboutStarWars
That's how my friends and I started.
AskMeQuestionsaboutStarWars
Also, some Dungeon master tips: loosely play by the rules, but have some order. Also, whatever you think the party is 1/2
AskMeQuestionsaboutStarWars
Going to do, they aren't. Always plan for the worst. Remember: this is the players campaign, guide it for them, but let them do their thing.
slapmychipsup
You find out which friends would dogpile a drow priestess in a prison break out. They spent 3 rounds choking and stabbing her on the floor.
Worldbreaker12423
I'm DM'ing for my roommates, had to roll to see how hot a lady they rescued was. I fucking crit...the rogue now wont stop hitting on her.
strugglesnuggler
For example all my friends think I'm a sociopath because I play morally grey characters.
BoozeHound001
Namely when a simple breaking and entering goes wrong and the entire house is held hostage. Hostages die, guards are killed best of all...
BoozeHound001
they forget the item they were sent to get.
thefuckwouldiwantacaravanthatsgotnofuckinwheels
This, I just started playing and wish I had my whole life
Leithreas
I also personally learned a lot about socializing and interacting with others through it.
Bigbadsmell
Geeky is not a bad thing
GerberLegalTeam
I had a group I played with a while ago, even brought gf along, this made me want to hit them up, it was fun. I just got too busy.
MysteriousFawx
I found that people who think D&D is too far often really enjoy a system like Fate Core, less numbers for players but all of the interaction
cspinasdf
D&D always felt like a board game combined with drama club. If you didn't like both of those things, you weren't going to enjoy it.
gleely
I caught an angry shrub and made it my pet. Clarence is very happy riding on my Paladin's shoulder. Also one time I made a religion based on
gleely
breaking the fourth wall. It was great. That was Dungeon World though, which is like D&D mixed with "Whose Line is it Anyways"
PowwerOrb13
Ooh. You'd like the pact DM Warlock homebrew.
Habaz72
Bard"can i fuck it?" Dm"it has 12 legs and spikes coming out from every angle. " bard"that didn't answer anything.." dm"go for it man"
spiffynidd
I've played that bard before. Did not end well for her.
AntonioStark
If you want to learn which friends will go "Lord of the flies" on you when shit goes down, this is it.
Rookthebaggins
You want lord of the flies play Risk...
bilalss4
Welp now I want to play
AntonioStark
My wife tried to pledge allegiance to the first boss we encountered. He had an undead dragon sure, but Christ talk about loyalties.
BayouStar318
Undead dragons, though....
AntonioStark
Lol. She didn't even bargain! At least ask for a kingdom.
dobbythehouseelf
I'm playing an evil character in my party filled with mostly good alignments. It can get super fun.
IW42
I hope this isn't your friend. https://rpg.stackexchange.com/questions/107025/how-to-deal-with-a-chaotic-evil-player-character-as-a-player
dobbythehouseelf
No no no I am not that guy. My character has reasons to keep them alive. They still are my allies and I'm not chaotic evil.
mykittyisbetterthanyourkitty
The more I read stories like this, the more I consider finding people to teach me to play
DivineTroy617g
I can teach you to play, but it's up to you to learn to play your characters.
Rookthebaggins
Forewarning: it will get you hooked if you have a great group
AskMeQuestionsaboutStarWars
Yea, I hate the negative stigma surrounding D&D. The stories that I've got from some campaigns have been absolutely hilarious.
Feveth
I can imagine the healer one was pretty good. I mean, he's probably used to those sounds...
rabidCOVIDphysician
After watching a few really exceptionally good lets-plays of it, the stigma is totally gone for me and I NEED to play it. (YouTube: NODE)
RoombaTheAssaultVacuum
Some of the funniest and most touching moments I jave ever seen came from DND
SaintMaceToTheFace
We have had year long campaigns that have put fantasy novels to shame
phe0n1x
It's ok, the jocks and machos have Fantasy Football.
braska71
We want to play with our kids but don't know how to get started any suggestions
UsernamesAreStupidAnyways
Getting the books(at the very least the Player's Handbook - or,if it's still a thing,the starter set)and learning the rules is a good start.
ProxyPlayerHD
there are always negative clichés... until people actually try it *cough* Minecraft *cough*
TheDoodleman
I once played a game where the party was supposed to fight a bunch of guys and eventually became their generals and brought them to war.
sonianosia
oh, how u enjoyed these! i play Pathfinder with my friends and it's AWESOME!
OshyuOshyu18
Whilst dnd comes with some amazing stories it doesnt hold a candle to paranoias absurd stories.
AntonioStark
Tell me more.
OshyuOshyu18
So let me tell you the setting. It was a high programmer game in which terrorists had taken out the main power grid so they were 1/?
OshyuOshyu18
Scrabbling in order to fix it as well as a food shortage problem. So they order 17 million tons of potatoes. Which 2/?
TheKaijuConfederation
One time, my friend lost his arm 4 times in a single session.
AntonioStark
Well. You had my interest. Now your have my attention.
ForThoseWondering
Most fun I've ever had.
AskMeQuestionsaboutStarWars
Agreed
PhycoPenguin
I just started playing a week ago and we already have inside jokes within the party.
ohjohnboy
I want to play!
JustAnotherLinkInTheChain
I think critical role has done its best to counter that stigma
fuckthisshitwebsite
I think D&D is for nerds is better. Much funnier, not so serious.
HugfordBlops
I saw an article about Joe Mangianello (sp?) on Force Grey. I discovered Matt Mercer, then Critical Roll. I'm hooked. I just need a DM now.
AskMeQuestionsaboutStarWars
Yea? I've only heard a little about them.
GothmogLordofBalrogs
its big enough that they are getting their own comics
SamuraiChemist
If you can get into it, there are well over 400hrs of content now. Great campaign imo. Some truly epic, and touching moments. I love it!
JustAnotherLinkInTheChain
YouTube them. It took me a little bit to adjust to the format, and I think part of it was because they were exposing a very personal part
JustAnotherLinkInTheChain
Of themselves but it's worth the ride.