MellowHippy
305576
8308
106
Lies!
Lies!
Feb 27, 2017 5:25 AM
MellowHippy
305576
8308
106
OfMiceAndMenus
Pretty sure some of this shit is illegal and deceptive marketing.
FitzChevalric
MioRaem
Some of these are bordering on fraud. The others ARE fraud. Holy shit
Jimmybeard
The Japanese prawns were made for sushi and pre-beheaded. The fact you still get the heads is the perk.
Booooopppp
Hello darkness my old friend..
feckr
damn, i'd burn someone's house down over that pizza
NoImNotBored
#1 Reminds me of those girls that wear padded bras.
StunnedGoofy
SelfSedatedSince1997
this shit should be punishable by law
imightbeabearindisguise
Hey! I resemble that remark!
tf58
I think this one is actually quite clever.
ThatHadNotOccurredToUsDude
Accurate metaphor for 99% of Tinder dates
chinablue
but they did look like that when the picture was taken ...(years ago)
testzero
I saw a south park episode about #4.
dweadpiewitwobbits
Better than giving your kid a bag of these:
Unquote
Better than watching black pete's terrorize kids in a London park while Russell Brand explains racism.
LeighS79
which episode?
AkiyamaRuss
season 11 episode 5
LeighS79
Thanks :)
strudelman
The world is so corrupt.
teahouseoftheaugustmoon
Not all of it :)
LittleKnownOne
All of it.
JulianHausen
Most of it
Ivel333
According to you
ingelri
Hey, and me.
ascottdude
And me.
AnAverageAverageGuy
"How to make sure a customer will ever only buy ONE of your products"
darkninja2992
those last two are why i never buy convenience store sandwiches anymore
Gladius82
Fake news.
TheDapperDilo
drcklm
Is that a jaw that has droppen?
minkeymagik
I chortled out loud in a stand up meeting
Xxsamurai010
Why is this so funny?
ihatetheweekends
I do this in my car to my kids.
frequentdot
fantastapotamus
why can I no longer favorite images in comments? whhyyyyy?!?
ImSaltyWalty
I can on Android
fantastapotamus
yeah, but then you're using the app.. yuck. ;)
ImSaltyWalty
But I can favorite images.
EnjoyThisGIFofYourUsername
Shitbuttfartpoopasscrapturdpissqueef
You..probably shouldn't try mine.
EnjoyThisGIFofYourUsername
ImSaltyWalty
Holy shit man, I don't even know how you'd do mine. +1 for following through!
ATalkingMushroom
Probably can't find one for me, but what the hell?
EnjoyThisGIFofYourUsername
ATalkingMushroom
Oh, damn.
OnlySupernaturalWillDo
EnjoyThisGIFofYourUsername
OnlySupernaturalWillDo
ImmaNeedBoutTreeFiddy
DO ME!!! DO ME!!
capngoat
"You're gonna wanna be careful about yelling that out in a bar." - J. D.
EnjoyThisGIFofYourUsername
ImmaNeedBoutTreeFiddy
Hahaha!! Thanks!! Do you mind if I use this sometime?
IWantToHugAllTheCatsInTheWorld
I want you to do me too! :D pretty pleeease
EnjoyThisGIFofYourUsername
KneelSaysTheDemonLightWithItsEyeOfCoal
I feel like #2 and #3 are just bad luck.
oneofthosemeddlingkids
I'm just stunned that it's apparently necessary to advertise that way. Same goes for the "made with real sugar"-line on American soda cans.
AssistantToTheRegionalManagerDwightSchrute
I mean looking at that Brioche, would you want to buy it if that's what was on the cover? It looks pitiful
JohnSmitheson
Well most American sodas these days are sweetened with corn syrup due to corn lobbyists and lack of regulation in the sugar industry.
oneofthosemeddlingkids
Ah, enlightenment. Always +1. :)
WellWellWellLookWhoItIs
Specifically high fructose corn syrup.
bardock
that brioche looks dry as fuck, even with the proper amount of chips i bet it would still taste like a sponge
WriteStuff
False advertising is one thing... Some of these are outright theft!
yuyufan43
The shrimp one isn't so bad. They left the heads for appearance but you don't have to do the work of removing them.
mikalove
Actually, you generally eat the heads or at least the innards. Amaebi is great
yuyufan43
Really? That's cool that it can be used! I've never eaten seafood before. :x
defenestratemeplz
The last pic made me extremely mad.
Superchief86
A lot of those seem like a lot of extra effort just to be a rip off.
Justforlookingthrough
Some of these are ingenious.
EnjoyThisGIFofYourUsername
commanderspooge
Do me! Do me!
EasilyAmused127
A scale next to a scale.
gopracticespittingoutteeth
Damn homeboi got a eighth of raisins
WhatDoYouCallAManWhoHasNoArmsAndNoLegsLayingOnYourDoorstep
Tree Fiddy
DerBoeseMann
Be happy...one more reason not to buy and eat shitty stuff
TheFeralDog
I can tell you for an absolute fact raisin bran (Kelloggs) has WAY more raisins than the pic here shows
utgort
They do not make it one box at a time.
TheFeralDog
I eat it darn near everyday it has a lot more than shown in the pic, two scoops i'm not sure of. I would need to know what size scoop
utgort
My point was that there will be variation between boxes. On average two scoops. Certainly more true then a foot long subway.
TheFeralDog
There is variation, but what is pictured is more than I've experienced in at least 100 boxes
Unquote
Hi there CEO of Kelloggs.
Affray
Yeah, I've been annoyed by the amount of raisins before. Maybe I want a raisin free bite everyone once in a while godammit.
tranquilomeng
I feel the same and also wonder why I'm so irrationally defensive on Raisin Bran's behalf...
FsImgur
Found the liar.
AMeaslycommentNotWorthTheDownvote
Can you not see the rest of the raisins am I the only one? Am I going mad?
AlcoholicsAnonymousBYO
Kellogg's really raisin the stakes on misleading advertising - a cereal offender, almost.
thatauzzieguy
I dint understand. Can someone please spoon feed me an explanation?
lordintrovert
Milkin' it for all it's worth!
posthuman001
I am doubting this one. There are that many in a single bowl.
rhinofire
I gotta be honest I'm skeptical about this one when I buy raisin Bran it's usually full of raisins. Maybe I'll do my own test
defenestratemeplz
But ain't nobody got time for that...
rudejohn
Best analysis of the raisin bran quantity fiasco: http://www.scq.ubc.ca/whats-the-scoop-a-quantitative-analysis-of-kelloggs-raisin-bran/
TheFeralDog
That pic is a lie I get that many in every bowl. I eat it almost everyday so I'm kind of an expert
RiftSkipper
Gross
TheFeralDog
It's the bees knees, I only eat granola, Cheerios, and raisin bran
meltedfaceguy
I love that cereal but weirdly i prefer fewer raisins in it.
rudejohn
Raisin bran does not cheat. http://www.consumerreports.org/cro/magazine-archive/2010/february/food/raisin-bran/overview/raisin-ov.htm
AlcoholicsAnonymousBYO
Lookit you, coming in with your fancy pants facts
MooNJuIcE90
Best comment
pandro
Post Raisin Bran ftw - they stopped putting it in their ads, but I get "A Raisin in Every Spoonful." That's quantity plus flake design.
SuperSlackStar
Would you ever buy twice? It's such bad business sense.
norill
reason why i dont eat at kfc
Ichose2
Some of these you return and suggest the retailer stop carrying them if this is the norm, which would actually hurt the business.
IcedLance
Produce -> get 300% return -> change label -> produce...
mrgrynch
As a company, how could you not feel shame?
InTheDistanceAPlaintiveEnglishHorn
Companies don't have feelings they aren't alive
CongratsYouAreHereNow
companies don't feel
Janusha
There is no such thing as "shame" in third world countries. Only joy in cheating and getting away with things.
Elroydb
I tried to interview Wal-Mart but the building refused to answer any of my questions
SharkXXL
Money, Money and ... Right! Money$$$
mrcalifornian
Normal corporations are legally obligated maximize profits, which is why I love https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Public-benefit_corporation
mrcalifornian
(also, I think this shadiness is often just short-term thinking and is actually bad for profits long-term, but that's a diff topic)
Tarmaccian
That's a myth. Corporations must do whatever their charter says, which usually doesn't make short-term profit the main goal. 1/2
Tarmaccian
There were lawsuits to that effect, won by execs arguing that charity makes more future customers, so the for-profit charter allowed it. 2/2
drfarren
part 2: include the period at the end of the link or wiki might poop itself
drfarren
Legal precedent states they have to operate for shareholders, not employees https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dodge_v._Ford_Motor_Co. circa 1919
mrcalifornian
Totally, as I mentioned in a separate comment, short-term thinking like this is usually bad for shareholders but other decisions might (1/2)
mrcalifornian
...be good for shareholders while still going against the good of the public, which is why I'm all for public-benefit corporations (2/2)
DoodlePenisPewPewPew
As a company wouldn't you want repeat clients?
DustyMcKnuckles
Not when you've got enough fresh "one time" customers to make profit. Like an airport or remote gas station.
Qumefox
A lot of these look like 'vending machine' food. So most of the customers are probably one offs or people with no other choice.
CatBlaster5000
People are fucking stupid.
MyOath
Corporate manager gets short term profit boost > bonus check > move to new company. Rinse repeat. Repeat sales are next guy's problem.
drfarren
CEO's are who you're thinking of
MyOath
Not limited to them. Anyone above the run-of-the-mill middle manager is playing this game.
drfarren
People are used to being treated like shit and just accept it. They come back because of convenience or low price. That's how they survive.
whathappensifichangethistext
Money. A whole bunch of money
JumpedtheGun
Better hope you have a lot of first time customers, because some of those definitely won't get repeat business.
defenestratemeplz
Money bought our lives and dignity
mrgrynch
I never knew there was much money in booty ass sandwiches, but I guess I should start selling them
theshinobi23
Workplace vending service sandwiches usually look like that where I live. And they sell them between $3 and $5 each. 5 has the full pieces.
ThatOneAlienOnTheInternet
The market for "booty ass sandwhiches" is either huge or small. Can't tell which...
The5lacker
Honestly even just a little bit of money. A nickle is all it takes.
MrUpv0t3
Exactly what i was going to comment...no one cries inside a Ferrari
JustAGamerDreamin
Well, despite what you hear on the news and from judges... a company is not a person, and thus does not feel shame. Or anything.
WellWellWellLookWhoItIs
Unnecessary pedantry. You know "company" is just a quick shorthand for "all the people who run the company", who should be feel shame.
PollesFinanser
I would disagree. The connotations of the specific phrasing can be important
chehoz
FragileReality
Then why do my elected officials keep listening to them talk so friggin much?!
SoapyMammaryMasturbation
Because the literal actual psychopaths that run them have money to give to elected officials to help them get re-elected.
AnythingMuchShorter
I think most of them may be sociopaths, though some are psychopaths
FragileReality
I meant 'listening' as in accepting moneyed speech. Which I don't know if that's the right term..
SoapyMammaryMasturbation
Because they need to campaign for reelection, and that costs money.
NickBlight
God-Damn some of those were shameless.
SarcasticComment
HAVE THEY NO HONOR!?!?!
docHolidei
some? SOME!!!
tanadarko
the panda lollypop made me legit LOL
DisneyMoreDisney
Chocolate Chip granola bar
KapnKershaw
PirateBot
God-Damn some o' those were shameless.
NickBlight
Arrr Gah-DAMN som-ah-thos warrr shameless. Step up your pirate game robot!
Itsalwaysabengaltiger
Why so many downvotes?
ThisTimeItIsForKeeps
It's a bot that tries to turn comments into pirate sounding mess. It's just stupid.
AgressorBunx
Very minor pirate translation
Autocorrekt
Taiwan airport got me w/ that sandwich.
Raxiel
Also known as a British Rail sandwich
SarcasticComment
perfect example on how you "not coming back" probably won't matter. new customers every day.
NickBlight
Ouch, still it's a decent story
CongratsYouAreHereNow
pope rabbit was my absolute favorite thing i've seen all day
SarcasticComment
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cebp-uYXEAAUERc.jpg Easter's on its way!
coffetangent436
That rabbits face was nightmare fuel
mormacil
*Bishop
OneShucklak
Was that supposed to be a pun, cause if so I snickered.
ChristJ5
South Park called it.
AkiyamaRuss
isnt that already a south park episode?
allOcIsGoodOc
They aren't raisin the brand reputation
Ayxu22
let me introduce you to thing thing we call PROFIT BITCHESSS *throws a roll of quarters*
Doopapotamus
Im sure the Japanese shrimp one is supposed to be that way tho. All they did was remove the heads for you?
chairmanmeow101
They way they packed it, it made it look like you were getting more tail.
easybrz
Which is smart, everyone wants more tail.
AreThoseMyPants
A whole bunch of people wants more head than they're getting...
easybrz
Well there's Moorhead, MN, MS, IA , and MT. that should be enough for everyone.
Yuken
This will only work in a place where the market is huge, because none of those customers will be coming back.
Treblaine
Or if they do come back you better take cover.
jeandolly
airports... gas stations... Worst sandwich I ever ate was at a gas station in Germany.
easybrz
They get away with those sandwiches at gas stations when I was working rigs we didn't have a choice it was either those or chips and jerky
linkator
Or where the offer is small, no choice for customers.
theplayahaterball
If there was no choice one would not need to trick customers into buying
thelaaaaaw
A grocery in my town was cheap like that until another one opened. When clients started going to other one, they started being 'generous'