iTouchMySelfToHarambe
317469
13839
180
Guys We Did Something
Aug 7, 2016 10:23 PM
iTouchMySelfToHarambe
317469
13839
180
CharlesFuckingBronson
http://imgur.com/WIV9CGt
snappygiraffe
Um, not really. It was just 'suggested' they go from 'endangered' to threatened since there are now over 6,000 of them. 'sigh'
DarthXerxiis
DeathByUngaBunga
Don't give up! We can get em back on there if we try
PixlTheif
"You guys dare me to make a creature both cute and gross?" - God
arcenlapin
Yeah, and they haven't been for a few months now. Under a rock recently?
hammersquirrel
For now
v
Alivid
Alivid
VegardSat
Well no shit Tumblr is full of them
RumpshakerzGentlemensClub
Holy christfuck. That was amazing
MarkSurge9411
GoldenPornProject
iTouchMySelfToHarambe
superking32
Talk about one hell of a username, @OP
awwctopus
*Florida manatee. I don't know if it could be said about the Amazonian or African manatee.
inappropriateunzip
Florida only, the others aren't endangered
FatManWithoutPants
shit, I thought we wouldn't have to deal with Brett Keane anymore.
MinxCyro
Thank humanatee! They're alive.
unusedautopsy
That username
superking32
Same with you.
unusedautopsy
well played good sir.
tiddersandbacon
I should become endangered this way I can get the sex
Itisseventyalonghere
Sex, with hippies watching and clapping while you do it!
BrontTheGoodBoy
Something for everyone, I guess.
TylerTheAnarchist
cool so i can start hunting them now?
EadEchiC
At least one is still endangered. If my mother in law keeps this up I'm definitely hiring a hit man.
VibratingNipples
irony is when she hired a hit man first
burodsx
Irony is when she kills the hitman with her bare hands.
burodsx
http://www.kptv.com/story/25220580/woman-who-killed-hit-man-hired-by-own-husband-has-message-for-other-survivors
ExileonDaytonStreet
They've been upgraded to Still Fat And Slow
chrisdafish
Don't underestimate them some lady passed out because one was swimming next to her
JustTheFactsMan
Still Fat And Slow? Oh, the class that SJWs are in.
aleister94
But adorable though
lelidk123
They look like fucking Winston Churchill.
aleister94
are you implying Winston churchill wasn't adorable
lelidk123
No.
aleister94
you'd better don't be (shaking fist)
Perfzilla
What does your mom have to do with this? We're talking about manatees.
WhereCanYouSeeLions
Oh the huge manatee!
eetsumkaus
why would the town bicycle be fat and slow?
freeupdoots
Boonzo
Rainbowfight
TinyFaceWiIlSmith
http://imgur.com/M4ZScZa
piizzla
Damn ..
leighlovesbooks
ZING!
TeddyBearWitch
Savage. +1
ParrotOverlord
Isn't it the same thing?
mmurrbles
Burn
TheMotherOfOP
You think it's a burn, but remember, all of you love me when looking for "BBW" porn.
hashtagKKas
Username checks out.
piizzla
I still don't love bbw's so ...
MoonPrismPower
MrsTitsMcGee
their nipple is on their armpit.
qussow
Fun Fact: in the West supernumerary nipples tend to below normal nipples, while in the East they tend to be above them.
Turdnado
So are your mom's nipples
Pnkfaerie
Yes, this is a nursing calf! Neat!
JanetSnakeh0le
Username (kind of?) checks out.
yetiburglar
and they sleep like cartoon vampires
ThisWasATriumph
manatee mammaries
ignimbrite
mammatees
TheQueenofLakeIlmen
Same with dugongs
MesserAuditore
I didn't do shit.
OliverClothesoff70
I managed to not kill a single manatee. Didn't you?
Saukoeter
I ate only a few
prettierandyoungerbutnotanybetteroff
That's what I was thinking. "We"? Hah.
Girtouh
Yes we did. We're here, lurking by computers or cafés with wifi, instead of going out on the open seas to hunt manatees. Do nothing=helping.
themaskedhobo
Actually thats exactly what we did to save them... we stopped doing a lot of things that caused their downfall.
FsImgur
EXACTLY. You ever see the signs that say "Don't touch them. Don't ride them. Don't even look at them." Well it worked.
pallentx
Did you kill any manatees? If not, you contributed. :) Nice work not killing something.
o11c
If the entire human population would stop doing anything at all, the Earth would be a much better place.
hoboranger
start with yourself
xaviouswolffe
Except for humans... and the animals that are now human dependent.
SeekerOfUsernames
@op I like your usernam
iTouchMySelfToHarambe
Thank you buddy!
LiquidLizZard
ya about that..
Olli399
Water-Headed Idiots Situation.
despozblehero
Did you know? Used motor oil can be used to water your lawn....
nightripper
Instructions unclear: there was pain. Horrible, fiery pain. Can't afford ambulance. Had to take bike. http://imgur.com/ABlsqpy
Deimos420
but sir, in project mayhem you do not ask questions, sir!
PlayingWithDynamite
Sooooo, we can eat them now, right?
RoyDMercer
I have some lovely recipes to share,
PlayingWithDynamite
sea cow, meet sea steak. Surf and surf
darkunited
The comment i was looking for. I've heard mixed reviews as to what they taste like. I see them all the time and my mouth waters w/ curiosity
tonythetiger583
I hope they taste like beef.
bippityboppitybuttsex
Apparently they have been reclassed as 'Vulnerable'... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manatee they moved a whole space.
NiceCatchBlancoNinoTooBadYourAssGotSacked
I can work with "Vulnerable".
Cyzyk
*revs up motorboat*
Glemy
Lol!
Betyoucantgetmyperiodtothefp
*motorboats your mom "
thecattlebarron
Hahahahahaha. Milk out nose thanks
DrunkBarbaraWalters
*duct tapes knives to the hull of boat* not for long manatees.. not for long.
Webelos8
coincidentally, the PTB are looking at increasing the boat speed limit since manatees are no longer endangered. but that status won't last
SmallStrawberries
^^This^^ Between that and that disgusting aelge bloom it's almost like the state government is trying to kill them all :(
Webelos8
It's so irritating.
yourmomsfavoriteplayer
Manatees. Aka nature's speed bumps
thrashedbarrier
So if we kill one manatee will they become endangered
gtmiller
Extinct
Perfzilla
You Motorboatin' Son of a Bitch
ucancallmehNighthawk
I'll fuckin' end you if you motorboat over a water potatoe!
TwoDogsFucking
Looks like manatee's back on the menu boys!
SchlongReviewer
If you're Cuban they were never off the menu.
TheSkeletonWar
"What do you smell?" - "MANateeFLESH!"
Ryykur
Cr1nger
Just a bit off the flank
ThePotatoBandito
* Sharpens harpoon *
[deleted]
[deleted]
Lavatoryman
I was expecting something different
MTVSHBG
Beat me to the punch.
Bibes
If I could upvote this a hundred times I would!
evoguyix
Best comment yet
Ihavewaytoomanyfavoritestosort
NOPE! Still threatened, they're just not as much of a concern as they were before. Plus this happened months ago.
Turdnado
Username DOES NOT check out. Expected "CaptainBuzzKill" was disappointed.
Ihavewaytoomanyfavoritestosort
Hey, them not being endangered is still something to be happy about!
chipc
Up vote for LOTR.
DiggerPlease
Australian Aboriginals are big fans of the dugong which is our equivalent
iforgot87871
I love all the LOTR references I've been seeing on imgur.
ruferto
but like... which part of that do you really wanna eat?
Cere4l
theres only one way to find out. onebite portions of all parts pls!
WineWomenAndSong
GilaMonsieur
I can see the headlines. Florida Man Arrested for Selling Manatee Burgers out of Repurposed Ice Cream Truck
idownvoteselfiesbcfuckyou
zaicha
DadRandyMarsh
twofishtails
I'll get the harpoon.
Fishgape
What about their fins they don't need those
teddyboops
Aren't you just supposed to chop em up with propeller blades?
Cassiraa
I heard it increases your sexual.... and they're extinct.
RubyPorto
Hey, it works for Sharks...
DarkSock
Ain't nobody going to hear you scream out here
Vigilanterepoman
THEY ARE TO BE RETURNED TO THE OCEAN. UNSPOILED.
DarkSock
"On this day in 1976 in Hattiesburg MS, Colonel Sanders shat a soft Stan stool and flush'd it out to the pining sea" . O how I wept, people.
Paleodude2
Manatees use their front flippers like rudders on a boat allowing them to turn smoother.
howaboutyougohaveanalbumparty
Why's this downvoted? This is actually really dang interesting.
evilTroyAndEvilAbedInTheMorning
They'll be fine with the rough turns
Paleodude2
Yes I understood the joke but wanted to share a cool little fact
carbonkid17
He doesn't gets it precious! He doesn't gets the joke!
LongCommentChainAppreciator
Woosh precious, woosh.
BigisDickis
We shoulds explains's it to thems *golem golem*
strugglesnuggler
I've heard that manatee is delicious. Which was one of the reasons they were endangered.
IGetItFrenchClass
I have it on authority from a VERY reliable source that it is some of the best steak you will ever have. Sea cows indeed.
Turdnado
Sandhill cranes are insanely good too. "Ribeye in the Sky." Also, not endangered at all so go for your life.
[deleted]
[deleted]
strugglesnuggler
Well I know people taste like pork. If Manatees taste like pork does that mean they really are mermaids?
[deleted]
[deleted]
strugglesnuggler
Long pig is a delicacy in some places
LargeVarge
Manatees are friends not food Bruce.
Bahiano1993
Wait. No
Prppppp
Hahhahahahahah
DanTuker
Hella yea, they are almost as good as Bald Eagle
Turdnado
A little known fact about the Hopi...
twofishtails
Snail darters are much better on pizza than anchovies!
RoamingEast
Time for some sea-cow veal!
KyleBadge
No need to add the salt.
RoamingEast
not just salt. but a butter and honey glaze with pan fried mushrooms and peppercorn.
Bob64
nothehugemanatee
I am so relevant right now. All hail the manatee!
FreedomHorribleHorribleFreedom
ALL HAIL THE HYPNOTEE
Dysomnia
BrontTheGoodBoy
Absolutely captivating.
ohthehuemanatees
Hello
gavgavo
Bibes
I wonder what manatee tastes like...
Deimos420
rubber.. nono, SALTY rubber. that's the furthest I can go...
JustTheFactsMan
A lot like whale and dolphin.
finnforfun
They taste like extinction
VeryLittleGravitasIndeed
Pretty gross, TBH. The fat layer is like an inch thick and tough as rubber. The meat is like fishy beef. Do not recommend.
Perfzilla
They're extinct?
cew006
Nope. Saw a lot while helicoptering over south Florida. But never let facts intrude upon emotional eco terror.
GiantButtHead
YEAHBOI
catsrtasty
This was the first thought that came to my mind as well lol
zach10816
That made me laugh.
LookWhatsThatOverThere
Fucking gold.
BoxZ
If not we should see if we can make them into bacon
cazzegiare
Oh the Hu-Manatees!
X123V
Lol
CountryMetal01
Noo, the other direction, they've made a rebound, there are so many of them now they are no longer endangered, but they are still protected
mottingdog
They aren't extinct, they are just ranked up to "Vulnerable" Still need to take care of them so they are not in danger of dieing out anymore
LighttheMan
Thanks you just made me chuckle in a quiet room full of peaple I don't know
TheFoxyVixen
Listen here fucko.
madmardagan
oh no this is the opposite of what i thought was happening
SmellOfMonkey
ReverendFatherUncleRuckus
lol exactly what I thought
GalacticCrunch
We did it! Damn communist manatees are no longer a threat.
AlmostScientist
bruh
drtorpedo
fam
YouCaIIed
It's lit fam
PrehistoricPrincess
nah, usa actually protected them so much they got taken off the endangered, they are now seen as threatened which is awesome
AlmostScientist
was saying bruh cuz extinction isn't funny http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/023/007/f29.png
Perfzilla
What kind of asshole threatens a manatee?
AlmostScientist
motorboats
Perfzilla
You Motorboatin' Son of a Bitch
nobodygottimeforthat
hahahahaha
MrSovietMudkips
Yes.
neerkat
I want to downvote this because it's sad. However it is clever so.. +1.
buffOrpington
Literally the first time my thoughts've been wrenched from my cranium and dashed across top comment. Barbara manatee manatee u r da 1 4 me!
MattLor
newsguycraigevans
We just kept saying "One more couldn't hurt. And now they're gone!"
Titsonthewing
newsguycraigevans
This guy knows what I'm talking about!
guntacular
We're sorry!
HD2composer
Sounds like the average conversation when a box of donuts show up at a workplace or home
Bitflipped
*hides manatee cookbook* I DID NOTHING!
AFancyGentleman
"To Serve Man(atees)." Hmmm... I knew there was something we were missing...
SaintNewts
Just played this game last weekend. Holy hell, the rules! So many rules!
TherealNotSid
No officer I swear it says how to cook 'for' manatees
Herefortheshitposting
*reads "How to serve manatees" It's a cookbook! It's a cookbook!
Flubna
How to cook forTY manatees
BigMistakeBigHUGE
"How to cook 4 manatees"
Martecles
Living up to your username, I see
FilthyRedmond
It's a cookbook!
ObviouslyNotAnFBISurveillanceVanInYourDriveway
-.-
orangeisthenewbasic
Dammit Zoidberg
KOBK
Mmmmmmmmmmanateeeeee
samsonguy920
*Notes lack of Manatee Restaurants. Damn right you didn't do shit.
snuffcarcass
TO SERVE MANATEES
JustJoan112
FTW. It's still early in my neck of the woods but I know this will be the funniest thing I read all day.
Rawrihazshotgun
I read that in ziodburgs voice
cbh3
*cough* *cough* what kind of recipes you got hiding in there??
PlantyThePlant
Apparently the tail fin of a manatee tastes like some pretty amazing steak...long story short I have weird conversations with friends.
notabrainlet
Can I be your friend?
PlantyThePlant
Sure thing random stranger! Idk what kinda things u like to talk bout, but I'm into Pokemon, tf2, Star Wars, soccer, music, and other stuff.
YouCaIIed
*ADDS TO THE COMMENT THREAD TO GET UPVOTED*
Axleoke
I used to tell my sister that scallops were actually aborted manatee fetuses, the cruelest of delicacies
jill9700
Ahahahahhahha, I love it.
canilookaturbobs
sethery94
HE NEED SOME MILK
DetectiveSherlockHolmes
Kensidian
DON'T WASTE YOUR MANATEE LIKE THAT
StaleCheetoh
I was trying so hard not to laugh at this on tbe bus.
ASAPSleep
I actually did this when I read that comment
IronGravyBoat
Are you Ben or Kevin?
fulminatrix
Actually, after "endangered" the scale has "critically endangered" and "extinct in the wild" before we hit The Big E.
FsImgur
You must be fun at parties.
MasterofBees
Does that mean that humans are technically "extinct in the wild?"
ThisIsWhyIDontTrustPeople
Wolfos
Go into the mountains and you might meet some 'wild' humans. Mostly shepherds who won't be having none of this 'civilization'.
TacoPrime
No there are still some on Africa
Mtumbe
And Oceania, Asia, and South America. Not sure about Europe and North America.
sampes
Do you mean some people just bongo bong bongo and don't want to leave the congo?
sampes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHAyOZBza0U
yush308
Sorry what do you mean sir?
RandAIFlagg
The San, for instance, are a good example.
IFUCKEVERYTHING
No
fulminatrix
We're actually Least Concern. Generally the wild stops being the wild once we're there, but I'm sure there are some wild people out there.
Klaustrix
There are certain colonies of human tribes that stay in the wild and don't have much interest in the rest. Not all but some.
DickRogers
Robin Williams was pretty wild. RIP
cousteau
Wild thing!
MilkSteakBoiledOverHardAndYourFinestJellyBeansRaw
Sea cow = sea beef
VeryLittleGravitasIndeed
I've had dugong (the Australian equivalent) and that's exactly what it's like. Fishy beef. NOT very nice.
superking32
As an Aussie too, can confirm. It tastes so bad.
nerdguy99
What's the equivalent for chicken?
waffleincubator
In terms of abundance I'd say herring?
finnforfun
That's a red herring
finnforfun
Tuna?
Saukoeter
Definitely. The not - meat equivalent of the fish.