pizzapartyjosh
221659
7533
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Dog Tax
HmmICantThinkOfACleverUsernameRightNow
REAL hot dogs have curves.
Jayhatesspidersandshit
Life goals http://imgur.com/SEKl9Pu
hasanyoneseenmyplunger
I could last longer than 2 months if you have a tramampoline. http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4nvn2hyvF1r0cym8o2_250.gif
DruidNature
But the first date may be slightly rough.
hasanyoneseenmyplunger
I hope so.
GunganExterminator
Girl in #7 on the right isn't wearing a shirt
SchneggediSchnegg
Isn't that kate moss? And naomi campbell?
AFelineMassofEyes
#7 Is that Naomi Canbell?
YouHaveToRiskItForTheBiscuit
Bad papas is the only thing that i like *wooh*
NuckDiddy
Rihanna looks like trash
AstroidClementine13
Was that Idris Elba?
BigfudgeDrshokk
I posted a picture kinda like that Will Ferrell one about Instagram and got a bunch of points
Wooooooooooooooooot
Love how #12 didn't even warrant a text.
Begotten
quietly judgemental franklin is a menace
RememberSodoku
I don't get the one about fingers.
Crested10
Don't fret. It's just an imgur-hive-mind-over-reaction. Nothing to get nervous about right. Right?!??
stevenwonder
Then it's time you fixed your own.
dualmonocles
So... nipple.
diphenhydraminehcl50mg
Anybody else spy that nipple?
bananatoast
It's totally cool for Mariah to have some extra chunk, she just needs to wear better clothes.
Heysuckmybatarang
It's also a photoshopped pic though. She looks better in the original.
?v1
bananatoast
Agreed. Still think the outfit isn't very age appropriate though.
kavadom
is that Becky?
ChiefBeefyBoner
That fucking pizza bite one
aPartyWherePeopleWeeOnEachOther
Nipples on the toilet... Just saying
bernlack
Holy shit those are a lot of dogs
Braveseverus
Did you see the balls on that squirrel? How does he climb trees?
TheRealDrSteveBrule
He just rolls up on em
smoochmysnoot
With his balls..
ChocolateWithRaisins
If I poop after a shower I'd get back in
Therearetoomanyusernames
Yup! Same.
AnnaNimitee
Gah. Those fingers.
YouAreMyFetish
Mine are not quiet that way but they aren't good either. Mostly because I do it when I get nervous
OdysseusLost
Mine arent that bad, but half my nails are smashed from work.
KittenAddiction
Mine is a nervous tick, but not that bad though
CutChemist
God, me too, it's an "DSM-IV-R" (cough, bullshit), but I do have impulse control problems. Mine actually look fine, not bit to the nub.
RedOnDaHead
What other impulse control issues do you have? Asking as a fellow nail biter that can't figure out her triggers
KittenAddiction
Mine is general anxiety coupled with oral fixation
theTenderOne
Nailed it. Not like those fingers
SerialLurker
Mine are worse than that. :-(
dannidoodles
I'd been a biter for almost 30 years. Hard habit to break until I saw my 2 year old try to bite her nails. Haven't bitten in over 3 months
StidwellStudios
Mine are like that, but I take care of them xD moisturising and cleaning them up daily, I have PTSD and I deal with it by biting my nails
stevenwonder
Srsly I think some ppl are just born w/poor finger genetics.
svelorum
Denial is cool sometimes
NotAPervert
"Seriously I think some people are just born with poor finger genetics"
doctorphilgood
I don't bite mine, I just pick at them and it's been a compulsive habit for as long as I can remember
DeathByTeacup
Yeah, I'm a picker, too. I can stop for a while, grow them out nice and pretty... then I have a bad day and destroy them.
HindsightEleven
I have friends who literally have fingers worse than that. Half of their daily calorific intake probably comes from eating their nails.
AVerySeriousProposal
To be honest I used to have a serious problem biting my nails (all healed now) but i used to cover my fingers up with plasters 1/2
thatwilldopig
I bit my nails til i was 26 - just boredom really. Easier than cutting them. Decided that I was an adult and needed to stop. Cold Turkey.
AVerySeriousProposal
All the time bc i was self conscious, its hard to stop bc the very reasom you cover them up is the reason you bite them :/
bios166
How? I have this problem since 10 propably. Now im 21 :/
sugarkyle
I stopped as a kid but I'd gnaw on them when bored. Painting helps. I'll nibble when not painted. Try a manicure if you don't want paint?
AVerySeriousProposal
Trying to stop all together is really hard, the way i did it was each week have a 'safe nail' that I wasnt allowed to bite until i was 1/2
AVerySeriousProposal
Down to one finger per hand that i could bite it became a lot easier to notice when and why i did it and i went from there :) good luck!
HindsightEleven
Something that worked for me was biting the skin on the tip of my thumb. Over time it hardens up. Also it allows a vent for your anxiety.
twatwafffffle
Mine are like that, have been for as long as I can remember. I can't stop.
HeyJackie
Same, 22 years a nibbles
beansnweenies
It's a nervous habit for me. I realized my mom does it as well, Feel like I unconsciously picked it up from seeing her do it my whole life
twatwafffffle
That could be so. I just read an article it's also a sign of being a perfectionist.
beansnweenies
I've been called a lot of things...perfectionist is definitely not one of them haha. Interesting idea though.
twatwafffffle
http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/nail-biting-may-arise-from-perfectionism/
Lycalopexfulvipes
Poor people :/ If your nails look like that you're probably anxious enough to not need to also deal with social rejection due to your nails
TheQUARRYTheBOULDERSLesserKnownFather
I know a beta with fingernails worse than that, it disgusts me tbh.
pprmach3t3
yeah, mine are like that and i'm really self conscious about it
ColonelPrestonGarvey
Same here. I've tried to stop countless times. One day though.
lulu49
Don't worry we'll make it someday
pprmach3t3
SOMEDAY
translocated
I used to bite my nails really badly (they'd bleed) and one day I suddenly stopped wanting to do it. It'll happen, give it time
pprmach3t3
did you win the lottery or get on antidepressants or anything because that might be an indicator. i've been at if for like 20 years now lol
msmantis
Mine were like this back when I was super anxious. They're a lot better now.
iamthehuggy
Oh my gosh my heart just leaped. My left pointer finger looks like your top picture. How did you get it to grow back correctly (1/2)
iamthehuggy
Oh my gosh my heart just leaped. My left pointer finger looks like your top picture. How did you get it to grow back correctly (1/2)
msmantis
As counterproductive as it sounds, I had to keep biting the top portion of the nail, in order to make room for the healthy nail to grow.
iamthehuggy
Do you think if I were to file it instead if it would have the same effect? Also how long did it take for it to grow back normal?
msmantis
Maybe try clipping some with cuticle clippers? It took me about about a year for it to grow back to normal. (1/2)
TheodoreHelios
Could we see your nails? I'm pretty curious.
iamthehuggy
(2/2) my other nails aren't long, but they aren't like bumpy my pointer. I'm trying to get them nice for Jr prom coming up and it's like ugh
Omnomniscient
Mine just grew back to normal after about a month of of not picking it at all. Source: owner of 1/5th of a nail
chimchim666
the fuck is that skinny dude doing in that bodybuilding comp?
smoochmysnoot
Losing
burtonking
So nobody is going to talk about the size of the nuts on that squirrel
superjaybaby
White Chicks is on TBS right now.
CorneliusCornwall
Its probably over now
ShibiSF
How would you get 33 dogs to sit nicely for that pic??
Crested10
Great Dane, top of the left, and the Snoop Dog lookin' Mutt, dead centre, are both just about sick of this shit.
YoloSwagginsAndTheKnightsOfTheRoundTable
Was thinking the same thing
LennyKoggins
I will send cookies to whomever can name the breed of every single dog.
bekreider
All trained to sit and have a really good treat in your hand
TumblrFeminist
Wouldn't that make them want to come to you
bekreider
If they're trained to sit, they know if they sit they'll get the treat for being good boys
joshdova
Was that selfie stick one Charlie Murphy??
dontMakeMeWalkOverThereAndHugYouTillYouBleedFromYourAnus
#2 One word- bidet
baah182
One word - nipples
jevausie
I got one on Woot.com for like $30 a few months back and let me tell you it was a game changer. Never realised my butthole could sparkle so.
thegr8rambino
Lol nice
Order66exe
I get all the way down here. Now I gotta go allll the way back
Nadapang
I don't understand bidets, do you still use toilet paper or do you just spray water and hope for the best?
internetgod
Just spray the water and it dries up itself. The feeling of cleanliness is the same as after a shower. Paper can never do that.
disruptard
This is one of my main goals. I mean, if I end up one day with a bidet imma feel like I really made it.
jevausie
Check woot.com. That's where I got mine. They have them every so often for super cheap, even the warm water kind!
blueberrycupcakes
I have one and as a girl, I just use it one week a month. It's overrated. Use baby wipes if you don't have one, or after sex
Crested10
Mobile users hate you.
forresthopkinsa
As a mobile user... It's the second one...
Crested10
It's so far to scroll back up to see which one they were on about! Desktop users get to preview/review the image by hovering over tag ; (
ClarenceTehAngel
That 10pm hoein though
Shadowmoor241
They missed a great opportunity to say Hoe Hoe Hoein
gbombuh
What a perfectly shaped reindeer...
DependingOnTheStreet
I dunno, I think that sweater is "ingen bra". If you know Norwegian, that is a top shelf pun, trust me on this one.....
SoraPonyBoyVersetti
Mistlehoe
ClarenceTehAngel
Deez nuts rising in that hoes mouth
Whazdee
Camelhoe
DOWNVOTEALLEMOJIS
Rudolph the red hoed reindeer
jimieratchet
How apocalyptic are your shits that they require a shower to clean up?
JDevr
I've apologized to my toilet a time or two
Nysarius
I have a triple S routine. Shit, Shower, Shave. That way you can be fresh.
veryaveragedude
I do the shit, shave, shower. I feel cleaner that way
gmdave
Say one day, your hand touches dog shit. Are you going to wash your hands or just wipe them with a dry paper towel? You ass wants the same.
Awhaleandabowlofpetunias
That's where those flushable wipes come in real handy
gmdave
They are so bad for pollution, you wouldn't believe.