kam3855
84682
2200
114
Aug 1, 2016 12:07 PM
kam3855
84682
2200
114
Hipstersayswhat
TRUE FACT
Rodeodoc
Call BS on the baby on board one. Moms have those signs so everyone will know how special their vaginas are.
RakDoc187
The baby on board is a sign that the person driving is an absolute wanker
KathDu
Pirates actually had the first system of workers compensation in the world.
kam3855
Don't know how to edit but. First time on the FP thank you so much!!
falula
Is peggysue still doing these? I like peggysue
ThePinkMan
I laughed through the whole post, but this image was the climax, after which things got less funny.
misho
#26 is the Battle of Karánsebes. Read all of it. You'll thank me. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Kar%C3%A1nsebes
herrbar
do ppl still use tumblr or did yahoo kill it?
TheColourPeach
I'm laughing, dying hard
IamnotaKoala
Where are the other 462 images?
CaptainMalcolmReynoldsIsWhatINamedMyDog
"Oh my god she is outside"
TheLastSithposter
@markleggett Dress for the job you want, not the job you have.
Raptortilla
Uhh God the one about counting in French is so true. It was/is such a pain learning those numbers and knowing what's what in class
HaniiPuppy
#10 - Relevant comic: http://satwcomic.com/just-a-number
AlphaCommander
I am also am absolute fucking walnut. I did not know that is what those signs are for. I have two children.
AlbertHerbertHawkins
Me too, I thought for way too long that they were just bragging or something. "We're more important than you so don't hit us" kind of thing
MyLuggageAteMyHomework
#2 huge reason I always hated football. Games went way overtime and got in the way of the good shows.
Flames99Fuse
A lot of these are new, I'm impressed, I read tons of tumblr dumps...
BadLawyer
#19 I think people will criticize no matter what she wears. As a dude, I'm glad formal wear is easy.
StonesOnTheHill
Yeah. I own one suit. I can pass decently in most situations I can expect myself in by just changing my tie and shirt. We have it easy.
OSCgal
They will. Monochrome high-necked pantsuits are pretty Star Trek, but is that the only style she wears? Probably not.
TheFetch
My first thought on #11 I will literally give you my face if you stop
HardOfHearingLeopard
We need to make Snoteleks a thing
Josesharlo
Dey spoopy
RobertEmmet
The french counting one is amazing
PrinceMaggot
#26 Civil War
AkidwithCancer
No, if I remember right, they were fighting over kegs
HaniiPuppy
It wasn't, actually. They were supposed to be fighting the turks and mistook themselves for the Turkish army.
HaniiPuppy
There's no way of describing this in a way that doesn't make it sound like something from a Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett book.
HaniiPuppy
Link, btw: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Kar%C3%A1nsebes
misho
The Battle of Karánsebes, actually... a spectacular read from beginning to end! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Kar%C3%A1nsebes
NotTellingYouMyUsername
I think I just found the worst Wikipedia article in existence
ribidoo
Hillary N her spacesuits. Because for real
lucky13kenny
How to make me laugh: 1. act like ableism is a thing
lucky13kenny
I'm really not surprised imgur gets pissy when someone criticizes the idea of ableism. The most ridiculous idea to come out of Tumblr
Noevilgifs
#6 if you think about it, all the miners in the ground are technically in the earth
pyromob
god i hope the last one is real
Repede
In french 90 is Quatre-Vingt-Dix (four-twenty-ten) So close enough
Repede
Then 91 is Quatre-Vingt-Onze (four-twenty-eleven)... And so on
BraveUsersubNewestPatrol
Tumblr is known for totally true things that happened, right?
MightyTrismegistus
Of course. Everything is true on Tumblr
NilsRungholmJensen
Radiohen
Former teacher from that school here, It was actually true. All of it
CorneliusCornwall
Its not
AGrammeIsBetterThanADamn
Oh ok
HardOfHearingLeopard
Don't ruin this for me
PiGiSpi
The way it's written. Nah, definitely not real. But I want to believe
Snooj
Like my friend's dad used to say "Hope in one hand and shit in the other and see which one fills up first."
kadaeux
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hope_Dworaczyk If i've got hope in one hand and shit in the other, goddamn Hope fills it up faster.
senseihugo
One girl two hands?
kadaeux
I've seen a few of those. ;)
StonesOnTheHill
Tumblr doesn't need greentext, because there is nothing to really distinguish it from their regular text.
IHatePuns
I'm glad you enjoyed it but I always cringe at these fake tumblr stories. Not sure what it is about them.
PhiIIipJFry
They're written by teenagers who haven't learnt how to make stuff up convincingly yet. You can tell they think it sounds believable.
IHatePuns
Yeah I think that's a good description
TheGreatFucksFamineOf1982
They're self serving and insipid.
TheNoblePizzaDragonWhoLivesInYourFridge
yeah, all "look how awesome I am lololol"
DevOverkill
I feel like insipid isn't used enough. That's a damn good word.
TheGreatFucksFamineOf1982
If this was tumblr I'd write a post where I shamed a school teacher but using that word against them.
KirschPunkt
Even if it isn't, it's funny. So what does it really matter?
vamenn
I like to just pretend any funny story I read online is real. It makes my life so much better.
ostiniatoze
It's not that funny though
tristeza
Because it would be much funnier if it is true. Everyone can make stories, what's the point in that?
KirschPunkt
One of my favourite authors once said, that a good story doesn't have to be real, there is no need for it to happen [1]
KirschPunkt
A good story is a true story, and true means that it COULD happen in this exact way. Truth is not reality, but truth makes a good story [2].
foxracing254
A sandwich cutter? Like....a knife?
definitelynotsatan667
Or one of those things that cuts the crust off and also makes a neat Dino shape
sweatshopkids
I'm 33 and still use those for my sandwiches
SuperFluffyRabbitEater
Neat!
MaciekWaszczuk
Like... A wife?
foxracing254
The life of the wife is ended by the knife!
SuperFluffyRabbitEater
Oh no.. You did nOT JUST DO THAT
MaciekWaszczuk
*TRIGGERED*?
Fuckweasel
No, no, that's the dishwasher. Don't get your appliances confused, can be dangerous.
jsng12
Like the oven
smogswallowssuns
#5 though. I think the paramedics wouldn't read your stupid sticker, 'cause they're busy with saving your fucking lives.
aslightlyjudgementalchair
I like how you all are arguing so much about the relevance of a baby sign like it's your personal duty
kbright22
well if the car is really damaged the paramedics might not be able to see the child and they would have to know to look for them
songbardbird
I'm pretty sure it's to explain to cars behind you why you may be driving more carefully/slower.
kam3855
I just liked the absolute fucking walnut part
smogswallowssuns
Granted, that's funny.
andInOtherNews
Literally the plot of I, Robot.
Dispari
The explanation sounds made up, and I doubt anyone who buys the sticker is getting it for that reason.
Larkos
Yeah it was made to get people to drive more safely. The original comment was right and the poster is not a walnut.
goda90
It'd be helpful to know because a baby is more likely to be blocked from view in a wreck than an adult.
ilavalamp
a sign, suction-cupped to a window, is unlikely to be there anymore after an accident severe enough to jostle the baby chair from it's seat.
spiderqueendemon
I have a 'Pets on Board' sticker, simply because my cat carriers look like duffel bags from the top. It's like 'please don't overlook them.'
spiderqueendemon
I keep it on the one carrier, so I can stick it in the window as I load the last cat. My kid's sticker is kept on her seat, same reason.
spiderqueendemon
I mean, normally I wouldn't bother, but both stickers (really more like placards,) were a present from my cousin the EMT. I guess he'd know.
spiderqueendemon
Given how crap his wages are for the heroic work he does, anything he'd take the time to buy for me must be worthwhile, is my logic.
tristeza
But in some cases that sticker would make a difference in ones behaviour behind the wheel. IMHO.
GorgeFloyd
True, they piss me off so I drive aggressive as a motherfucker around those cars.
tristeza
Why they piss you off? If someone wants people to drive safely around their baby?
GorgeFloyd
The arrogance of it. Like I give a fuck about your crying screaming poop machine.
thelonepig
Yeah no one takes it down when the baby isn't on board, so theoretically EMTs would be searching for the missing baby in those cases.
aviciousunicycle
#2 irks me because people actually do that. Tornado warnings are a matter of life and death. Every time there are storm warnings (1/2)
aviciousunicycle
around, I can count on at least one local meteorologist having to go online and address the complaints from people missing their shows.(2/2)
definitelynotsatan667
Idk man. I grew up in central OK and I'm more worried over who won American Idol than some twat-waffle tornado. But maybe I'm desensitized.
CocaineAndSelfPleasure
Same but in Wichita. Time to go watch TV in the basement.
MightyShoePrint
Right? You gotta be a bitch to die from wind
aviciousunicycle
I...I am concerned for you. But not for the tornado-thing, more for...I mean...is American Idol still a thing?
TheLastSithposter
No. It's just an indicator of how little Satan cares about tornadoes.