In case you were wondering - How not to be an idiot at the zoo

Venomous vs. Poisonous

Both venomous and poisonous animals produce a toxin that is injurious or lethal to another organism. The real difference between the two terms involves how that toxin is delivered. Venomous organisms inject venom into other organisms, using fangs or a stinger. Poisonous organisms, on the other hand, do not deliver their toxins directly. The entire body may contain the poisonous substance and may be harmful when eaten or touched.

Monkey vs. Ape

The most obvious differences between apes and monkeys are: apes don't have tails, and they are generally larger than most other primates. Like most rules, this one has exceptions: some monkeys lack tails and some are large. Gibbons, considered to be lesser apes, are smaller than some monkeys. Apes rely more on vision than smell, and their noses are short and broad, rather than snoutlike. Apes are capable of creating tools and using language. They have complex social lives and are capable thinkers and problem-solvers. Basically, monkeys are dumb-asses.

Bee vs. Wasp vs. Hornet

A bee can generally only sting you once, while hornets and wasps can sting multiple times. Fantastic.

Buffalo vs. Bison

The American bison (Bison bison) lives only in North America, while the two main buffalo species reside in Africa and Asia.

Horns vs. Antlers

Antlers are grown as an extension of the animal's skull. They are true bone and are a single structure. They are generally found only on males. Antlers are shed and regrown each year.

Horns, found on pronghorn, bighorn sheep, bison, and many other bovine, are two-part structures. An interior of bone (also an extension of the skull) is covered by an exterior sheath grown by specialized hair follicles, as are your fingernails. In fact, your fingernails and the exterior sheath of horns are made of very similar materials. Horns are never shed and continue to grow throughout the animals life. The exception to this rule is the pronghorn which sheds and regrows its horn sheath each year.

Pronghorn vs. Antelope

Not much to say here. Take a looksie at the photo.

Turtle vs. Tortoise

Turtles spend most of their lives in the water. Turtles tend to have webbed feet for swimming.

A tortoise is a land-dweller that eats low-growing shrubs, grasses, and even cactus. Tortoises do not have webbed feet; their feet are round and stumpy for walking on land.

Frog vs. Toad

There really is only one true family of toads. Butttt for simplicity's sake...
Frogs are mostly aquatic; most toads live on land (but near water). Frogs have teeth; toads do not. Frogs are also typically longer than toads. Frogs have smooth, slimy skin; toads have dry, bumpy skin. The bumps, however, are not warts, and a person cannot get warts from handling a toad.

You'll never see these two species in the same ecosystems. So basically, Coca Cole lied to us.

Crocodile vs. Alligator vs. Gharial

The main criteria used to distinguish members of the three crocodilian Families are associated with the head, particularly the jaws and skull.

Alligators tend to have broad snouts, which are often referred to as being shovel-shaped or U-shaped.

The upper jaw of crocodiles is not as broad as that of alligators and caimans. Also, it is sharply constricted or notched on the snout. Think of more of an "V" shape.

The Gharial has a greatly elongated snout.

Sea Otter vs. River Otter

Sea otters rarely venture on land, where their movements are awkward and clumsy. In contrast, the agile river otter is frequently ashore. River otters maintain at least one permanent den on land, near the water, as well as several temporary shelters. While all otters consume fish and other aquatic animals, river otters also forage for food along the shore, and they prefer to eat on land rather than in the water.

TLDR: the one in the ocean is a sea otter.

Rat vs. Mouse

Image pretty much covers it

Llama vs. Alpaca

The llama is about twice the size of an alpaca. Which is really only helpful when you're seeing them stand side by side. When llamas and alpacas aren't cohabiting, the dead giveaway is the ears. Llamas have long banana-shaped ears while alpacas have shorter ears.

Dolphin vs. Porpoise

Dugong vs. Manatee

Dugongs and manatees are cousins which is why they have many similarities. They essentially have the same body structure except for their tails. Manatees have paddle-like tails while dugongs have a tail more similar to that of a dolphin. While considered large sea mammals, dugongs are actually smaller compared to manatees. Another difference in their bodies is their snouts. Manatees have a prehensile upper lip that they use to gather food and they have a generally shorter snout compared to dugongs. Manatees also don’t have incisors while dugongs have tusks.

Ostrich vs. Emu

Emus are the second largest birds native and are native to Australia while Ostriches are the largest birds and are native to Africa. Both sexes of emus have deep brown feathers while the ostrich males have black and white feathers and females have brown feathers. Both are capable of disemboweling you with a kick.

Rhea vs. Ostrich

I didn't know that these two were that confusing...

Vulture vs. Buzzard

In the US, when someone refers to a buzzard, it means a turkey vulture, a member of the New World vultures. The word "buzzard" is an old European term used to refer to several hawk-type birds. When you refer to a vulture as a buzzard, you are essentially offending all hawks.

Hornbill vs. Toucan

So how do you tell them apart at a glance? Hornbills are easy to differentiate due to noticeable casques, the ridged structure on the bill. Researchers say this feature gives hornbills the ability to amplify their vocalizations in the rain forest and drop some sick beats.

Penguin vs. Puffin

Penguins inhabit the Southern hemisphere while puffins range in the Northern hemisphere. Penguins are much larger than puffins in size, but they have a proportionally small beak to their body size, whereas puffins have a large beak in relation to the body size. Also, penguins are flightless birds, but puffins can fly.

Duck vs. Goose

Geese are largely sized and usually noted to make a honking noise or call, while ducks are smaller and usually have that “quack” sound when they call. Geese have more web in their toes compared to the ducks. Also, if you're staring at one in the face and still have no idea what it is, look at the nostrils. Duck nostrils are very high up in their bills while geese nostrils are very low down in their bills.

Bear vs. Koala (not bear)

The only shared characteristic between these two is that they're both mammals. Other than that, they are completely different critters. No. Koalas are more closely related to kangaroos and wombats than bears. They fall into the class Marsupialia — animals characterized by giving birth to underdeveloped young, which the mothers then raise in a pouch. Do bears do that?

Kangaroo vs. Wallaby

Both these critters are macropods, meaning they have big feet. Both are marsupials. Both live in similar habitats. So if you get these two confused, you're not a complete idiot. The biggest difference is that a kangaroo is much bigger than a wallaby.

Squirrel vs. Chipmunk

Chipmunks are small mammals with distinct stripes, while the tree squirrel is larger and doesn't have stripes. BAM. Short and sweet.

Hedgehog vs. Porcupine

Porcupines are very large rodents with over 30,000 quills covering their body. Hedgehogs are much smaller not-rodents with about 5,000 quills covering their body. However, porcupines can lodge their quills in a predator's skin while a hedgehog can only turn into a tiny ball of scary looking spikes.

Dove vs. Pigeon

There is no true scientific difference between 'pigeons' and 'doves'. While the smaller pigeons often get called 'doves', this is fairly inconsistent. So you go ahead and call that pigeon a dove.

Red Panda vs. Raccoon

Really?

Coyote vs. Wolf

Coyotes are mostly found in the southern, central, and western Canada. Wolves can be found in Alaska, Northern US, Labrador, and the Yukon territories. Coyotes are generally considered shy and non-confrontational and their main foods are smaller animals like mice and rabbits, certain vegetation, and carrion. They often hunt in pairs and prey on animals like deer when together. Wolves, on the other hand, prey on larger animals like goat, sheep, and moose and hunt in packs. They use the method of scent marking to determine their territories and track down prey.

Rabbit vs. Hare

The most obvious difference between the two is NOT the ears. There are several breeds of rabbits with straight ears. No, the biggest difference is found in neonatal (newborn) rabbits and hares. Rabbits are altricial i.e. their young are born blind and hairless. In contrast, hares are generally born with hair and are able to see (precocial). Young hares are therefore able to fend for themselves very quickly after birth.

Both seals and sea lions, together with the walrus, are pinnipeds, which means "fin footed" in Latin. Sea lions are brown, bark loudly, "walk" on land using their large flippers and have visible ear flaps. Seals have small flippers, wriggle on their bellies on land, and lack visible ear flaps.

Donkey vs. Horse

Donkeys have visibly longer ears, while horses tend to have longer faces. The hair making up donkeys' manes and tails is stiff and bristly, whereas horses' manes and tails have softer and more flowing hair. Donkeys have smaller hoofs than horses of a comparable size. Don't mess this up or you'll get an ass-kicking.

Serval vs. Cheetah

Too many times I've been asked if our servals are baby cheetahs...it's time to educate you guys.
Both cat species are from Africa. Cheetahs are larger and built for speed with adaptations like semi-retractable claws to dig into the ground/push off and a floating collarbone to allow hyper-extension of the front legs for long strides. Servals have incredibly long legs in proportion to their bodies, and they are built for leaping and jumping to catch birds out of the air. Think pogo sticks. Servals have both spots and stripes, while cheetahs only have spots.

Spoonbill vs. Flamingo

Spoonbills have a spoon-shape at the end of their bills. Flamingos don't. Easy.

Cage vs. Enclosure

In reality, even the image labeled "cage" is referred to as an enclosure. "Cage" is an archaic term. It's like calling your flip flops "thongs"

Trash Can vs. The Ground

If you don't remember anything else from this post, at least try to be aware of this one.