hrhoover
187048
5170
79
Sep 28, 2013 6:43 AM
hrhoover
187048
5170
79
supraman2turbo
I've worked as a cashier, I've heard the corny jokes. I just take them in stride and as a customer I always try to be polite to employees
keyblader1985
*inspects bill* "I just printed it, lol." ...That one got old after the thousandth time, and I still hear it several times a week.
CoachBriceWilliams28
SMH.....I remember this.....Worse.Joke.Ever.
lawlysmoke
This was refreshingly funny. +1
TheolaTjarks70
Yeah, I see your point. I worked at a friend's gas station during college. It was in a wealthy neighborhood so no customers gave me shit.
CharlieLuckie
Reason one why I quit walmart
sourceofthelight
I always just look at them straight in the eye with a blank expression and say "No. No you will be paying" and keep eye contact for too long
nomnompickles
I do the same thing. I also have to price all the orders that my store gets, so I know there's a price sticker somewhere on it.
dNa87
eye contact is always too long.
VinnieJonesDiary
As someone who worked in sales: They dont realise you hear it everyday so dont get so fucking offended by it. You're just making u job worse
Shekkles
I understand what you're trying to say, but I can't fake laugh anymore, and that joke needs to die.
n0ey
Another (while checking a $100 bill) "I just printed it!" -___-
drnz
I have never made this joke.
TheKittyBerzerker
I've told some of my regulars when they see my unamused face that I have heard it everyday for the past 5 years,they stop making that joke
magesinger
A thousand times yes.
somelameusername
I work at a liquor store. When I ask if I can see the customer's ID, they often respond with a "no ha ha," then they show it. This must end.
UggMcBugg
I made this joke the other day and then had Nam-esque flashbacks to being a cashier and hating people for this
ardentlyincendiary
I read this as a Nazi-esque flashback... ???
UggMcBugg
noo! luckily not. Though I guess jokes about PTSD flashbacks are a bit tasteless anyway....whoops
IHaveThePerfectPuzzleForYou
wtfeyebrows
did you apologize profusely or just stand there and look haunted.
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UggMcBugg
and walked away shame-facedly
DrWhoodles
To me it's like talking about the weather, you don't really care you just have nothing better to say.
TotallyNotAGirl
Note to myself: Dont make this joke again.
meowmeownow
The 'again' gives me hope because it implies people can learn.
tacophone
In Canada, if an item scans at the wrong price, it is actually free (up to $10).
tacophone
This is called the Scanner Price Accuracy Voluntary Code (google it! I have done it several times :)
TBOmaha
At the paint store: "Now, are you going to come home and help put this on?" All day, every fucking day.
thisisjunk
Seems right.
oynezra
Why is it wrong that they're trying to make pleasant small talk? Really, these jokes just make cashiers out to be the jerks.
dipity90
Or the people who make the corny jokes get all offended because you don't laugh like it's the funniest thing you've ever heard.
ScientistTiger
It's the repetition. Try hearing the same 4 exact phrases all day every day.
dipity90
It's not usually just these jokes. It's that you've already dealt with a number of honestly bitchy people and you're annoyed as it is.
jaybee07
As someone who works in the food industry: "Can I get you anything else". "How about a million dollars?" >:[
tallroses
When I was a cashier I always said, "When you're coupon doesn't scan does that mean you don't get the discount?" And they shut the fuck up.
dipity90
You're not an asshole, it's just overused. Imagine you HAD to look at imgur every day, but it was only the same five pictures over and over.
MyCatIsHotterThanYou
I worked for lowes this summer and I had a customer honestly believe his item should be free because I had to find the item number for it.
DQGrillburger
I work at Fred Meyer and have gotten that, too. Or because it got "item not on file," or something w/o a tag
hette
Ah... Now I understand why that question's a trigger for you guys.
MyCatIsHotterThanYou
"I should not have to pay for this!!!! This is an invonvience to ME!!!" Ugggfhhh go fuck yourself.
SorryThatsTheLionKing
I've worked at Lowes for 3 years, and this is my most hated customer phrase. That and "let me give you something to do."
beavus
I work as a cashier, just got home from a 9 hour shift and i don't hate these people. The joke sucks, but they're trying to be nice.
dipity90
If I'm in a bad mood, these people just add some extra pressure to my temples, but they're not the ones I remember when I get home.
beavus
Yeah, they might annoy you at that moment, but they're not the asshole customers.
sauronlives
People making friendly small talk are just the worst
LetsTalkGameDesign
You're one of the people who makes this joke all the time, huh?
sauronlives
No, but I like your username. I just think it's important to see the good intent behind these awful jokes
SalsaOreos
You know how you find it annoying that you see jokes complaining about this joke all the time?...
Granolaclusters
I refuse to believe this is sarcasm.
raccoonstarsmember
I am the retard that says "so, after three tries it's free, right?".I admit it.
pr0nty
I make the joke in the comic. I didn't realise people hated me for it. :( I like to chat/joke with cashiers.
raccoonstarsmember
Me too :)
CharlieLuckie
At least you're honest. Props
raccoonstarsmember
:D
mynameisminerva
I make a self-deprecating joke that I always pick the defective product when it won't scan. I bet that's annoying too, but slightly original
Yoshiru
As a target cashier: Most people go out of their way to be nice to cashiers, don't be a dick back.
dipity90
As a Target cashier, a lot of people go out of their way to be rude to cashiers, and I'm not allowed to be a dick back.
Yoshiru
tehee "dick-back"
pr0nty
Is making a crappy joke really considered being a dick, or were you speaking in general?
SmashleyKK
I made a joke referring to these jokes a few weeks ago and got downvoted. Different crowd I guess.
GBMaker
Timing is everything.
TheIllustriousLady
I've learned the later at night you post something, the more likely it is to get downvoted to oblivion.
Kexfabriken
A man in front of me said that today and i though about imgur and smiled.... i hope you felt the connection i felt with all of you then ;)
IAmTheAwkwardPenguin
I live for that connection... Wifi connection! Ba dum tsss!
StupidFuckfaceMcCrapperson
At least that's just a joke. I work at a hotel and get people trying stuff like "housekeeping didn't leave an ashtray! I want my room free!"
buttercream
Yeah, and the woman who fills out a feedback form to tell you there are no pens in the room to fill out the form...
karorius
MOST people think it is a joke. Some people don't give up because they need to lord it over a retail person at least once a day
JackieKaras
I worked in a nicer hotel and business men and hookers would come complain about something dumb after a few hours to get outta paying
Yokosumari
This would be even more hilarious if it's a smoke-free hotel.
tracereading
"You asked for a non-smoking room."
squiddylumpkins
Ooh and my favorite *calling down* "I left my car for the valet." "Did you leave your keys here?" "No." "...We need your keys." "Really?"
EnigmaNL
I never understood that, why do people feel entitled to free stuff when something goes wrong with their service/product?
AudreySingson
I work in housekeeping and laugh behind those peoples backs. . because they're ridiculous.
StupidFuckfaceMcCrapperson
I've actually laughed at their faces a couple times. I just can't help it when you look angry about something so fucking stupid.
Rhase
The worst part is they're probably the same people that steal ash trays...
StupidFuckfaceMcCrapperson
Would not surprise me in the least.
AudreySingson
yeah, they are. . they really are. .
TheBitSlinger
Fawtly Towers should be playing on a continuous loop in each and every hotel room in the world.
StupidFuckfaceMcCrapperson
Hah I didn't even know that existed! A hotel show with John Cleese...don't mind if I do!
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CharlieLuckie
I had this woman who's card kept getting declined get pissed and start yelling at me for it. 'Yeah let me just hack your account'
Bunnyontherocks
Mean cashier! :p
CharlieLuckie
Rofl I didn't say that of course it was 'I'm sorry ma'am but there's really nothing I can do. I can get my CSM over here to help'
ArcaneM37
At a Hilton property (where I work) they would have gotten it for free. 100% guarantee and all that.
Bunnyontherocks
Ever have someone not read the debit reader and approve cash back and then freak out saying they didn't ask for cash back.
Bunnyontherocks
Then tell you that you must have asked for the cash back on your side and you need to put it back in their account.
squiddylumpkins
"I had to pull harder than normal to close my door, I want both my suites comped for both nights!"
ComeHonourFace
The amount of stories I've obtained from working the front desk of a hotel... People are really strange.
chaseNC
3 years as a hotel bartender, 1 and a half as hotel night manager, I tell you what, I have seen some shit.
nanifatcatwhosallergictoothercats
I'm listening.
ankhtahr
not literally, I hope…
chaseNC
Once or twice.
CharlieLuckie
It's not funny and overused. Almost as bad as someone trying to buy alcohol without an ID
Caerus268
I always get the people that try to buy alcohol with no id and then turn around and try to buy cigarettes.
Bunnyontherocks
I worked in a college town and did the service desk and money center. I had a football player try to cash a paycheck without an ID. (1/2)
Bunnyontherocks
(2/2) I wouldn't do it. He said," Do you know who I am!?". I just stared at him. He had a huge bitch fit.
CharlieLuckie
Haha god I hated the assholes. My last few days it seemed like they all came out to say goodbye. Holding my tongue was hard
dipity90
At Target we have to card EVERYONE. The system literally freezes without an ID. Older people bitch and moan.
Bunnyontherocks
In TN that is the law too. Or it was when I was still living there.
ConfuzzledPuzzles
Well, if he didn't give you the ID, the answer to his question would be No. And that would be the problem.
ACESZAdvanst
I don't think I would last a month at a place like that... "No I don't know who you are BECAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE YOUR DAMNED ID" /tableflip
ApostateOfBacon
As a bank teller: "Do you have any free samples?" Shut up you daft whore.
horsebananas
I like to reply with, "Yes. Of lead. "
kaldrenon
To be honest, this is the first time I've heard that and I actually find it clever. But I'd also get sick of it, so I understand.
saccharin
My favorite response to the free samples/free money question is "Free money day is on Sunday."
EnnieB113
As another bank teller: Bitches.
MigratingCoconuts
It's always those dumb cheeky members who everyone secretly hates but has to be nice to and laugh anyway.
chrisofduke
i can't tell you how many times I heard that when I was a teller..
MMPRMastodon
When I worked at a bank, I would always say " yea, on Sundays"
ImmortalLoveRodd
That's perfect!
TotinosPizzaRolls
I don't understand
SirDroopyNutSack
well to be honest i did get a little baggy of shredded money when i visited the federal reserve so that can be a free sample
raglegumm
+1 for managing to sounds THAT bitter.
CharlieLuckie
Oh god do people actually say that??
WithNoNoticeableStimuli
All the time.
WithNoNoticeableStimuli
"Okay, $50 back - how do you want that?" "In hundreds." Hur hur
ApostateOfBacon
Every god-forsaken day.
CharlieLuckie
I feel your pain.
CoeusDarksoul
That, and in response to "What else can we help you with?" there's the inevitable "A pound of 20s!"
ronswansonisthereasonihaveadadfetish
I never have and never will.
QuietReaper
Say yes and shoot him with a shotgun that fires knickles
stlnstln
knickles!!!! are they like underwear currency?
StatisticallySpeaking
Give them a free die pack :p
AzaellexTytalus
I think you might mean "dye". Unless you just want them to die.
StatisticallySpeaking
I stand correctly corrected, ty. Although I'm sure some do wish they were DIE DIE DIE packs :P
9thDr
Applying for a teller position. Anything I should know?
ApostateOfBacon
Everyone is an idiot and they will try to cheat you at every turn.
defender417
Troll answer: Refer them to the penny you glued on the counter...
ApostateOfBacon
You, sir/madam, are absolutely evil and I might love you.
WoodlurkerMimic
I glued a dime down in front of the retail store I worked at in view of my register. Best summer ever. :3
BakedOn
Awyiss
Bunnyontherocks
Another thing to say to piss off a cashier, "This must be such an easy job!".
drunkgopher
Which is why self-check outs are a thing
DieselBrother
Pretty much the best way to piss off anybody.
CharlieLuckie
Fuck people who say that. Especially stockers.
youreasmellypiratehooker
As someone who has done both jobs, I would rather be a cashier
CharlieLuckie
Overnight cashiering at my walmart sucked. There were nights it was just me on the front end. Not even a CSM
CharlieLuckie
I got to stock too and I would've preferred that. Not to mention I wouldn't have my breaks an hour late.
youreasmellypiratehooker
Yeah, I see your point. I worked at a friend's gas station during college. It was in a wealthy neighborhood so no customers gave me shit.
AllTheFunnyOnesAreGone
To be fair it is incredibly easy. I've did it for two years btw
dipity90
There's extremely multitasking that can be involved, as I'm sure you know, but I do find the tasks simple. The customers are not.
tiramigiu
yeah but in fairness, having done the job...it is...it's mindless, once you get the hang of it.
axolotls
until you get hired at an understaffed store and suddenly youre working one job's hours for three descriptions...
ToxicPineapple
As a former Walmart cashier.... This.. SO mindnumbingly repetetive.
Sinus23
Until someone breaks the flow and shit starts to pile up and there are only two of you against 20 peeps and 4 of them need specific things
Sinus23
My record while I was a cashier was 5 people in a minute. The 10 sec+ that each transaction took was them handing me their money. Fucker out
Sinus23
Before someone gets the wrong idea. It happens during other peoples lunch breaks and they had max 3 items and paid with a card or paper.
smeegasaurusrex
Except the multiple tasks sent down from corporate and not enough time to do them while trying to sell product you haven't had training on.
hekkasdekkas
But dealing with awful customers isn't easy at all
tiramigiu
i cannot disagree, but we kindof knew that when we got into it.
OfficialJimmieRustlers
You know nothing. - dude who used to work in IT support
TBKU
PS, my previous comment was spoken in a lovingly jokish tone, not an angry one. I realized this was not how it sounded after hitting enter.
TBKU
Dealing with customers in IT support is also easy. Don't lord over other people, asshat.