undercoverpizzalover
316724
2578
68
Apr 27, 2016 11:49 AM
undercoverpizzalover
316724
2578
68
Robytium
I'm sorry, the Pajama one is an fml? Sounds more like the best day ever.
ruinedeye
Today,
deadatrocity
The girlfriend of 2 years has to be fake, because if they never even kissed in 2 years it wasn't a relationship, and best friends don't kiss
meeksmcgee
I want to see the picture of the dude mooning the old people with the car in the background.
MechaNinja
#8 http://imgur.com/SnFahDx
DaDisser
Sad thing is girls fall for stupid shit like this all the time. It just breeds more fuck boys.
JustAUserNameThen
Why would 300+ people say the guy whose best friend knocked up the guy's GF deserved it?
Wombatfisher
Same reason downvote fairies exist here on imgur.
insongwhang
My grampa had an SS card in europe back in the 30's
JekwA
People keep their SS cards on them?
GeorgeWeasleysLeftEar
+1 for the username for the cancer joke guy, "finding kemo"
IAmWayTooOldForThisShit
CerealFirstOrWaterFirst
if the last one was college no one would care.
BakeryBitch
The last one wouldn't have happened at my school because pajama pants were against the rules in the handbook.
Brokenbridge
Omg the username finding kemo
DaniaAudax
#21 needs new friends.
iCantBelieveImNotLurking
I have to file court papers to formally evict my abusive gf who refuses to leave. I'm sleeping on the couch of the house I own. FML
ShoopDeDoop
80% of these aren't even that bad. Some of them were even success stories.
Subsound
There's no way all of that is real because that just shouldn't happen. Maybe it will take the for acceptance
dailylamer
#4 having an SS-card can be offensive to a lot of people
SkinknamedJormungandr
It's more offensive that the dumbass kept it in their wallet instead of leaving it at home.
jesmonster
For Americans,SS means social security, not Schutzstaffel.
ForTheLoveofFox
thank you, I was really confused and concerned
ditto12g
I'm not detective, but I'm pretty sure that was the joke he was making.
jesmonster
Well, Germans would think of Nazi SS, and not everyone here is American.
ditto12g
Fair enough. But still, it was the joke intended
ditto12g
No*
helagos
Until you corrected it, I was thinking that English was your second language.
ditto12g
Welp, blame it on fat fingers and a small phone keyboard.
AnUnknownErrorOccurred
The best friend girlfriend pregnancy one is a blessing in disguise.
Howdoilife
I don't even see how people vote you deserved it on things like that
ThisGuy0
People who think cheating is justified. A.k.a. more shitknuckled rejected spunkbags.
AMacGyver
Because you now know two people to kick to the curb?
Rule29
Technically 3... just sayin'
HELPMETOMCRUISE
I like how your username is relevant.
thewitterfly
Right? He totally dodged a bullet there
airman2255555
"she had no idea we were even dating" after two years. At least try and make these sound realistic. Damn.
Geoplex
Yeah that one confused me also. How would that even happen? (Assuming neither party is 11 years old).
helagos
She could have been trying to downplay it to try and flip the tables on him. Women are crafty like that.
amandalibre
I love the accidentally flipping off the girl instead of the call me sign one. So close yet so far.
saraleecupcake13
I recently had a tow truck driver cause a lot of damage to my car. Thankfully my insurance covered it all because it was a company
saraleecupcake13
They have a contract with. The driver was a complete asshole too and abandoned me on the side of the road after I told him to stop.
northcarolinaisbeststate
Depending where you live you don't need to renew.
northcarolinaisbeststate
your license that is
RaynWisp
Yeah, I was just thinking that - in California, they renew it for the year if you get it replaced
northcarolinaisbeststate
I lost mine before i turned 21, so got a new one. Don't need it renewed till 2019 when i'm 25.
FargosGames
i don't have to renew my license until 2089
GassyWizard
I kind of don't believe most fml stories
JeremyBeadlesHands
I don't believe most fml stories
Meck
I dont know if they are true but if they are it proves that some of those people are fucking stupid...
Spazmatic666
12 is totally bullshit. How would you think a girl is your gf if there's no intemacy at all. and if there is well then at least there's that
SheilahChuppa56
She's not physically abusive. Verbal and emotional abuse don't get protective orders. Tell that to my kids when they're crying due to her
Rodvitner
The guy noticing the period is a keeper :)
Sororita
Agreed, sounds like he noticed something awkward and tried to make a joke to make it not so awkward.
MakeItBackAlright
"You deserved it" crowd excellent visualization of dick bag statistic on the Internet
BombasticBalderdash
Agreed. "I have a condition where I'm going to constantly be in pain and my parents laughed at me" -"you deserved it"...whaaa?
helagos
Or waking up to your kid with diarrhea and puking, then the husband sympathy puking. Yeah, she deserved that!
Sororita
Some of them did deserve it, or at least should have expected it. Like the guy who stopped in the middle of the road to moon people.
MakeItBackAlright
Yeah, obviously. But there "you deserved it" crowd was like 80%. I mean the, like, 1-5% normally
Armored0Titan0
Or the one in a previous dump that threw rocks at a homeless guy who proceeded to chase him with a knife.
doubleormuffin
And Rock Thrower couldn't understand why the guy was mad at him, and complained about it on the internet. Some people are so disconnected.
whyWontKeiraKnightleyReturnMyPhoneCalls
I kinda don't want to believe parents can be that shitty but you know they can
LowFatBatman
I was once real bad sick as a kid, my mom stole my cough syrup cause it had codeine in it. Oh and she left me at school for 5 hours just 1/2
LowFatBatman
Because by the time she picked me up it would almost be bedtime, so she didnt have to deal with me.
preaction
Classy parenting right there. We've got to get the most out of the government dollars spent in education somehow! Janitors as babysitters!
Kehy
I have ADHD that's nearly pushed me to suicide before I started getting treatment. Despite a Psych degree, mom won't believe I have ADHD.
PandaBearSoup
There more going on there than ADHD.
Kehy
ADHD-I, which led to anxiety, which led to suicidal depression. Turns out treating the first thing really really helps with the rest
thedancingemu
Same. Anti depressants didn't work, but once I started taking Ritalin I was finally functional and happy. I hope you can get treatment.
Kehy
I did finally get a prescription for Adderall, which is literally one of the best things to have happened in my life, all things considered
TroLoLolli
My mom didn't believe I had depression until she got it from our lack of communication & distance that it created. Only then did I get help.
preaction
Friend couldn't get financial aid because his parent refused to sign the FAFSA or the form saying they were refusing to sign the FAFSA
dippydoda
I went through this as well fasfa told me I could emancipate myself. I explained this to my parents who finally gave me info.
dephress
Why?
dippydoda
my parents said it was private info... they didn't even have to sign i just needed the income info it was frustrating
preaction
Apparently "You're an adult now and they don't need my financial information"
FoxPudding
Although illegal, at that point I'd forge the damn signature myself...
preaction
Turbo-illegal, and if caught, you'd have to pay it all back. But, I'd been forging Mom's signature since 3rd grade, so that's what I did.
preaction
Another guy I know adopted 2 kids from some druggie deadbeats, who are suing the gov't to get kids back because Lawyer loves gov't money.
preaction
Druggie dad admitted to be currently still doing drugs in court on the record and case is still ongoing.
Bombofclusterfucks
How is that even possible?
preaction
Lawyer's going pro-bono for gov't payout, adoptive parents don't have infinite lawyer money, and Child Protective Services is a clusterfuck.
BirthdayMassacre
CPS being a clusterfuck? There's an understatement. Fuckin organization is run like the mafia.
LoveWithAllYouHave
I love my mom but she is insistent I'm not allergic to shellfish and gluten and that something else is causing my breakouts. *sigh*
AgentSmithPS4
Too much iodine can cause them. Some multivitamins have 100%i, 1 egg 60?%i, iodized salt, etc...
LoveWithAllYouHave
it's been happening for over a year with the shellfish. Gluten just started :(
PandaBearSoup
Has a doctor verified your allegies?
LoveWithAllYouHave
I did the ALCAT test which did but that's intolerances
NinjaSpork
I think convincing your girlfriend that condoms were the biggest scam in history would actually itself be the biggest scam in history
insertclevernameshere
Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams
MrAgnosticman
I thought the same way with the Catholic Church, saying it's a sin to people in Africa who could benefit from condoms and not get AIDS
DaDisser
The guy is a total pleb tho lol
ZodiacTed
Also, just in case ladies don't know this: Do NOT put anything that can change the pH balance in your vagina! NO vinegar NOTHING
mountainofpuppies
yeah UTI heaven there...
beearewhyayyenn
Just dicks fingers and dildos! Got it?!
AureliaVerity
and lube. never, ever forget the lube. lube is your friend
IDoNotBelieveYou
And the occasional rubber chicken. No one is judging you for that, Jessica.
thoushaltnotpass
*rubber chicken with a pulley in the middle
IDoNotBelieveYou
Well that's just assumed.
doubleormuffin
Can't forget about tentacles!
Beezelblublublub
And the occasional baseball bat
GigaBoom2
Igetthatreffrence.png
TheDarkLordOfTrees
You mean my dick?
SkinknamedJormungandr
He said bat, not toothpick.