Help me, Imgur

Dec 16, 2015 8:45 PM

Padair19

Views

190403

Likes

6126

Dislikes

1452

Imgur, I need your help

As you can see I met this lovely lady on tinder the other day. She was natural beauty and how could I say no to that?

Here is my profile, brutally honest in some ways more than others. But whatever, I matched the pretty piece of pizza, didn't I?

Right away she took a personal shot at me about not making the front page before. It hurt, I can't deny it. But now I need your help to earn this pizza date. Two guys and a pizza place is a local place we have here and its dominant, help me, to eat her. Wait what?

Here we go again.

10 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 1

I thought we talked about this.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

ew stop

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Two guys and a pizza place? How ironic, because that's what's gonna happen when you get there, go on a date with a dude.

10 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 2

This is so cringey, how the fuck did it end up on the front page?

10 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Don't ask for front page...

10 years ago | Likes 29 Dislikes 7

Let front page ask for you

10 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 3

This is FP ringing. I request your presence.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 3

What the fuck happened to this site?

10 years ago | Likes 228 Dislikes 5

New people

10 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

Amen brother.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Good luck, but downvote.

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

The look on your face says your blackout hookup from last night just told you she is actually a he.

10 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

I don't know, she seems kind of cheezy.

10 years ago | Likes 40 Dislikes 8

Very sausy too

10 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

Didnt she want OC? Does this count as OC? i dunno guys seems kinda lame to me tbh...

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

All I read was "two guys" and "dominant" and "eat her". I need to go find a church or something.

10 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 2

Good luck, but your profile is terrible :')

10 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 3

post sucks

10 years ago | Likes 146 Dislikes 4

"Looking forward to meeting my ex wife" horrible

10 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 2

Please stop.

10 years ago | Likes 34 Dislikes 1

This is the stupidest thing I've never cared about.

10 years ago | Likes 132 Dislikes 10

I really, really, reeeeheeeeally wouldn't want to be OP's friend. The subtext of this entire post reads: "I'm basic, I'm a tool, and I suck"

10 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 1

And pizzaslut still wants to suck the facepubes off him. This is what happens when we let the jews take over our educational system. Smdh

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

Lol. Oh Hitler...

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

She said with OC. This copy cat bullshit.

10 years ago | Likes 28 Dislikes 2

Best of luck @OP, but I downvoted. This whole "omg sex for fp lols" bullshit rustles my jimmies.

10 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 1

Cringeeeeeeeeeeeee

10 years ago | Likes 92 Dislikes 4

I woke up today and wondered, 'how can I cockblock a dude across the ocean?' I won't do that to you, OP. Go get her.

10 years ago | Likes 356 Dislikes 43

That's every morning for me. I thought I was the only one...

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

She's probably as round as a pizza. God speed solider.

10 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 2

Across the pond*

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Same

10 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 2

These comments are savage

10 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

I feel old. Is it really acceptable to girls now for guys to talk about wanting to have sex before you even have a first date?

10 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

8 inches tall with a 6 foot dick

10 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 2

you should be top comment lol HA

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Hi #1 ... v

10 years ago | Likes 156 Dislikes 8

i have questions

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It's from a YouTube video called "Pizza Balls"

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

heyy

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Maybe don't watch this is you suffer from epilepsy. I mean, you probably aren't on the internet if you do, seems like a bad idea, but yeah.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

NSFPWPS: Not Safe For People With Photo Sensitivity?

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

thanks for the heads up to others.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

[Reads two seperate measurements comment in bio], -1

10 years ago | Likes 89 Dislikes 5

I know, I'm actually taller than 6 feet

10 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 99

Well isn't this a strange thing. Your post makes the front page and this comment reaches oblivion! haha

10 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 2

If I could do it again, I would write this comment over and put the exact same thing! Cheers

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 30

I wouldn't blame you! You need to lose some points so the front page doesn't get to your head and change you

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 4

that doesnt give u the right to be a hitler m8

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 14

Sorry what?

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 22

thats wot i thought. hitler

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 10

Right on! Keep being you!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 11

fuck this shit

10 years ago | Likes 486 Dislikes 13

Yeah, screw you @OP!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Right? I already hate these, but this one has to be the most nauseating one yet.

10 years ago | Likes 49 Dislikes 3

She said if he made FP with OC, this isn't OC, this is shit

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

All i can think when I see these is "ugh..."

10 years ago | Likes 66 Dislikes 0

Every time

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I'm actually disappointed Usersub let this one slip through. It's like the sentinals breaching the ship in the matrix. Hit the EMP!

10 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 2

That's not how it works.Nothing just "slips through." You want to stop it happening? Browse user submitted and downvote.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

@OP

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

Wish I could downvote posts like this more than once.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I'm kinda hoping he gets catfished.

10 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

I hope it's actually some dude with a piece of pizza.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Yeah, I'm sure when she sees you begging strangers to help you fuck her she'll be really impressed with you.

10 years ago | Likes 107 Dislikes 8

but...but...free pizza!

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 4

She called the bet. So, why should he not try to get to FP now?

10 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 7

she'll go through with it, probably because she's ugly

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 4

Whatever it will be, an update would be appreciated, @OP

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You get my upvote OP but, for the love of boobs, change your damn bio to something less cringeworthy!

10 years ago | Likes 1485 Dislikes 22

I can see, and appreciate, the humour in 'looking to meet my future ex-wife', but everything below that had me cringing.

10 years ago | Likes 49 Dislikes 3

And the picture is ok but a bit stark. Maybe a bit of colour in the background and smile!

10 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 1

This is a swipe left for sure :O

10 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

Do people even read bios on Tinder?

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

For the love of boobs!!!

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Amen sista

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I mean... It is Tinder.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

We all know you don't have an eight inch peen.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The caption in his gallery honest made it worse. Brutally honest? Okay

10 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

Yeah man, come on. You have a decent face shape, and all your hair. Just relax a little.

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Agreed. That profile... Yeeks.

10 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 1

I think the original is funny. This guy stole it and made it not funny at the same time

10 years ago | Likes 108 Dislikes 1

Hey that's just like all of imgur's memes!

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Agreed, the funny part was the casual self-deprecation. This is just bragging. Then again, some gals like a braggart...

10 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 1

Well if you like a braggart, how about you meet someone who's 6 foot 2 inches? And yes, those are two separate measurements. ;)

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

The "two separate measurements" line always makes me feel all face-punchy

10 years ago | Likes 406 Dislikes 2

Made me want to deliver one right in his suckhole

10 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Even when it's self-depreciating, like 4'3"?

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

In that case, it's perfectly fine.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You have my vote mayor especially with a name like that. Does your name match the description

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 10

I don't understand what two separate measurements means. Please assist.

10 years ago | Likes 42 Dislikes 1

"6 foot 8 inches, two separate measurements." Height and penis length

10 years ago | Likes 63 Dislikes 0

How could I not see that!? >_<

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Oooooh. Wow. Yea I was confused too. Thanks for the clarification. Just went right over my head

10 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

You have informed me. I will go eat a cookie soon. Those are unrelated facts.

10 years ago | Likes 49 Dislikes 0

They don't have to be unrelated.... they could get married, rhat would make them related.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 4

8====>

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Hello fellow albertan

10 years ago | Likes 27 Dislikes 8

Yay, more Albertans :D

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Hello, Friends. :3

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

He's from Leth, no wonder this is so cringey

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Hello fellow Uleth people

10 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

Ulethian checking in.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

There are literally dozens of us!

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Dozens!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

There are dozens of us!

10 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

DOZENS!

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

DOZENS!

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

I went to lethbridge once. Once.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

I went there too. It was terrible

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

Come to Banff. It's magical!

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

It's really windy, but the Slice is a decent live music venue. Also, one time when I was at the Denny's, someone punched out Marilyn Manson.

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1