IUpvoteMTB
61140
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Let me start off by saying that I have never been one to be able to tolerate spicy food.
That being said, I was out with my friends (so-called) when we had the bright idea to see who could eat the most peppers at the local Mexican food restaurant. A couple of them ate 2 each, and then they quit. They ate them one at a time. I had the brilliant idea to do a whole bunch at once and get the pain over with. I'm pretty sure I almost died afterwards, but whatever, I got $40 and a picture with the owner of the restaurant (probably because he wanted to show everyone what a doofus looks like).
So here I am, on the toilet, and my butt is on fire. ON FIRE. Learn from me, friends. $40 isn't worth this pain.
candiduscorvus
Fire in the hole today. Fire out the hole tomorrow.
notsureifishouldbeincognito
Trading pain in your corn hole for cash, you're now ready for a life of prostitution
TubaBandito
PepperWhore!
St0plight
I'm saving this since it's fucking amazing. Dot
Rifneno
IUpvoteMTB
I completely skipped over this and regret that it didn't hit in the top comments
Imgurkoff
$40 is $40
HuninHune
I sometimes forget that poor people exist and are willing to do stupid shit for small sums of money.
ArsonMurderandJaywalking
Well, I'm not dumb, but $40 is $40
manicmalki
Eat some ice cream with it. Or just something milk based.
RichardDeanAnderson
I had jalapeños on my burger last night and the morning dump was pretty rough. I can only imagine your pain
DeanP3456562456456
Once I ate a bag of flammin hot cheetos and a box of fiber one bars I was shocked hobbits didn't show up to throw a ring in my toilet
StonesOnTheHill
Pain will either kill you or pass. Money is gone in the blink of an eye. Friends die, betray you or move on. But glory, glory is forever.
IseeScrotum
That's deep fam...
windedsloth
dry those tears with the money you won
hockeydoctoralmost
Fullmotard
TP in the freezer.
NotTheRealNPH
I ate 4 of these the other day. No bet or anything just wanted to eat some. My stomach/ass were on fire the entire next day.
SaumilJ
As an Indian, ha ha ha ha. @op
ogotai
Mint tea, buckets of it
gotmojomang
Poop,it’s a burnin’ thing, OMG, my firery ring ....
TORGUEFROMPANDORA
And here we have a prime example of a wuss with a weak digestive system, habeneros aren't that hot imho (p.s. I'm white as a sheet, shut up)
URNSHOW
Damn, just $40? They really ain't your friends and got over on you twice. I'll let you guess when the second time was.
SleeveHo
Suddenly eating an entire Carolina reaper for no cash makes me feel sad
notsureifishouldbeincognito
alpacasnack
You and me both brother.
kraeftig
I want to play this game but with my friends someone would end up dead or we would run out of peppers.
Barlort
Milk.
Geo80
Next time try a Ghost Pepper, Trinidad Scorpion, or Carolina Reaper.
instantbeetle
As someone with crohn's - pussy.
cogs
I feel a Red Forman moment coming on...
ashtraymonument10
Bless you, and your mighty bum of pain.
TheNewestUsername
Been there. The next day i was in a porta-potty at work in 115 degree heat. Shitting razors.I cried they laughed. And laughed. And laughed.
untakenusername20
I would feel bad but it's just to funny ???? I'm sorry
Dismudafuka
@OP Up for a Carolina Reeper are you, I would send one if you're willing to post effects.
InspectorCock
I can handle spicy in but not on the way out. My cousin in the other hand, must have an anus made of steel.
watercolortitties
A grad student I used to work with called that "spicy twice" and was convinced I had no feeling in my anus b/c of the level of spice I eat.
yourbassist
Am I your cousin? I love spicy food and it doesn't bother my bowels. Neither does Taco Bell. Pork on the other hand...
InspectorCock
Idk, he is not a bassist to my knowledge. Would you like to be my cousin nonetheless? No, sorry, Im not in to incest fyi
Glumerlink
If you eat plenty of insoluble fiber it should come out fine (eat a salad, or guacamole or some shit) it's all based on your diet
InspectorCock
No shit? Seriously?
Glumerlink
Totally, the only reason people's systems can't handle spice and fat is because that's the only thing they're shoving in haha
KCBeard
Have you inspected it?
InspectorCock
Noooo...but that mofo eats spicy stuff like there is no tomorrow and has never complained of the fiery butthole. I've asked him too and he
InspectorCock
said "nah". Yes. I literally asked my cousin if his bunghole burned the next day and said no, never.
insomniax20
There's a saying when it comes to spicy food... You can train your mouth, but you can never train your butt hole.
InspectorCock
As bad as it may sound, my butthole always betrays me. And no, nothing ever goes in there, just out.
immaturelMGURimager
@OP have you been introduced to our Lord and Savior, flushable toilet wipes? Oh my god they feel like heaven on a stinging bhole
Ulthirm
Next time my friends my bum will be ready for the ghost!
thisismyusernamenowiguess
Amen
JesusAssCrackers
Dude, Tucks wipes, fold them up and stick 'em on your butthole for a minute.
Mikeupvotes
Nothing's going in my butthole son, not even if I'm shitting dragon fire.
IseeScrotum
Ijustwanttobememe
He said "on" not "in" your butthole. And he's right. Tucks work
JesusAssCrackers
They do! Source: I work for a GI dr. And it's on not in. If you're experiencing inner rectal pain consult a doctor
Moghul
If you mean flushable wet wipes, they (the flushable kind, yes) are NOT flushable. Look it up.
immaturelMGURimager
I've done my due diligence, and I've concluded that neglecting my personal hygiene for the sake of city sewage isn't in my best interest
Moghul
Lmao...
hoofbeatsandsnowflakes
you know you can just toss them in the trash right?
damien309
Then your trash smells like doo-doo.
AIterdcarbon
Exactly. Screw the city's sewage system.
SergeantTerryJeffords
Except they aren't really flushable and will destroy your plumbing and cost you thousands in repairs
immaturelMGURimager
Incorrect. I've been using them for a decade and my plumbing is fine. They damage city sewage filters, but I simply do not care.
bf3c
anyone ever tell you you're kind of an asshole?
immaturelMGURimager
Sure but it never gets old
immaturelMGURimager
The truth is that city sewage systems have shredders that are grossly inadequate for their jobs, and I'm not neglecting my hygiene for them
fescue00
U can just throw it in the trash???
immaturelMGURimager
I'm not keeping shit covered anything in my house. I don't want my bathroom smelling like shit.