zelgadiss44
195700
7389
95
Sep 6, 2016 3:10 AM
zelgadiss44
195700
7389
95
Armistice023
Ok, I'll allow this one because I actually LOLd
Paladin714
Aliens!
Cheesesaveslives
Alright this is funny, +1
KarlaOm
+1 Nice title
Witchering
FajitaPrinceofAllMexicans
...So does this mean we can have out of context D&D quotes make a comeback?
fauxglove
If this doesn't belong on the front page, I don't know what does.
cocowitt
That doesn't look anything like hieroglyphs, but I had a good laugh, so I'll let it slide.
Kaldilor
Likely found in Egypt, but probably more Greek, as during 200BCE it was the Ptolemaic Kingdom.
hurricane921
Anubis on any other day in that situation
TheIrishMike
http://49.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lyqu0g18lo1r7gakko1_500.gif
TheGlow
I remember having my pick pockets at 150% or so. I was also the first anyone since in the group plant items on other players.Dissension ahoy
heypeopleiamausername
Anyone here who plays smite?
hardystone
I FCKIN FAVORITE THIS SHIT. I. CAN´T. STOP LAUGHING
vennthrax
god bless tumblr
Daddygeek84
The die is actually Roman, but was found in Egypt: http://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/551072
lokite
My hero.
resiler
Rolling for agility... I want to give Bast scritches
KharnApproves
I snorted coffee out of my nose at that. Thanks.
AstartesLibrarius
I'm kinda disappointed in the Internet. Not one pic of Bast getting head scritches, numerous furry porn pics of Bast getting other things.
resiler
To be fair, horrifying porn is more appropriate to Egyptian mythology (most mythology) than scritches are.
otiumCatulli
It wasn't really Ancient Egypt in 200BCE, it was getting on for Hellenistic. Ancient is more like 3000 BC
lurker314
I'm SO freaking glad I'm not the only person here who is modestly historically literate.
UpvoteSquirrel
The Hellenistic religion was merged with the Egyptian religion under Alexander.
BeardyGlasses
Those aren't pyramids people, giant D4s.
Mewowo
Is it worth the effort to learn D&D? Like I dunno if I want to learn how the game works etc. (If I want to play I already know a group)
MyLuggageAteMyHomework
You will have the BEST stories to tell and it's a REAlly fun way to develop a character
onlyhalfghost
oh hell yes, if you can find a group of 3-5 people who share at least one day a week availability with you.
keelinn
I think so! It's so fun. I joined an established group and had a blast.
BuzzKiIlington
Imagine mixing a make your own adventure book with an improv show and sprinkling in battle mechanics. Basically D&D
projectFirehive
Yes, I did so recently, no regrets. Just make sure you start vanilla.
ajivani
There is a very simple D&D variant called 13th Age that takes about a half an hour to learn how to play.
ajivani
/2 you can get all the source material legally and for free on the publisher's website, site.PelgranePress.com
Earan
And that's why the "crit skill checks" house rule is dumb as shit.
keelinn
I think it's fun! It makes things very interesting, at least.
PotatoPotates
As an Egyptian this had me laughing way more than it should. +1
nodadpleasestopyourehurtingme
God I miss d&d so much.. Such an awesome game
imoutofnames
I laughed at "Anubis is pretty sure you're bullshitting him" more than I'd like to admit.
SilverWingsofMorning
I enjoyed this post. I have never seen it before.
Zuphalas
Same reaction
UponFurtherConsideration
I hate that your generic comment is the top comment more than I'd like to admit.
JamesAHarrod
And that pickpocketing part too
HisDudness
That's what really got me.
BeerBatteredandBold
Yeah that was pretty good. I can see the DM just being over this shit.
Incidentally
Pickpocketed a hill giant god once. Coulda got the backstab but our cav was already charging so I was not gonna be there anymore.
Joelrassic
I want more Egyptian D&D now
HurinIsMyHero
Same
MarvelousMuggle
Trying to start a group. All my friends seem truly interested. But we need help. Please help me! Local comic shop was less than enthusiastic
captbananapants
"Nat 20" on a skill check. *nerd facepalm*
MyLuggageAteMyHomework
Why *wouldn't* you house rule that? It would make for amazing sessions!
SpunkyMcGoo
Don't play 5e?
captbananapants
It's the same in 5th, unless your house rules say otherwise.
GuardsmanMiku
allowing crits on skill checks makes RP so much more fun though
captbananapants
It is fun sometimes. Got a nat 20 stealth and nat 20 sleight of hand in broad daylight to steal a kings sword and crown. DM reverted after
MyLuggageAteMyHomework
I got a nat 20 rolling Animal Handling on giant cthulu fish. Combined w/ thaumaturgy, my Tiefling made them shit themselves. &I'm the cleric
keelinn
Agreed
Secretsquid
I laughed myself into a coughing fit.
HandoB4Javert
I know the pyramids are just eight sided dice, where was this found?
InternetExplorer2001
*four
sprrt
great pyramid of giza has 8 sides, arguably because the casing stones fell off
Falanxzealot
Or it was just a really, really badly made Star Fort.
sprrt
the argument is more that the split sides signal the equinox, therefore are likely to have been deliberately built that way
Falanxzealot
I was joking. No, I absolutely agree. There's enough discussion about it to warrant that understanding.
HackerJacker
Mate they have 4 visible sides, so whatever the hell there is under it the minimum possible is 5
HackerJacker
But that would be unfairly weighted due to irregular shape so 8 is more likely.
Kaleopolitus
Have YOU been underneath them to see? What if there's a reverse pyramid underneath, making it d8? I'M ON TO YOUR CONSPIRACY
InternetExplorer2001
Holy shit
MyLuggageAteMyHomework
This whole thread is amazing
orangatuan
Okay, I can't pick pocket Anubis, so I pick up the scales, and attempt to knock Anubis unconscious by hitting the back of his head with them
UpvoteSquirrel
the entire court room notices this, Set is called in and arrests you. Casting you into the Duat. Welcome to Hardcore Mode.
nuclearwessels
Someone knows their Egyptian mythology. Well done.
UpvoteSquirrel
Anubis takes the dead half way through the Duat for Judgement. Set is Ra's guardian who guards against Apep in the Duat.
UpvoteSquirrel
When ever the sun goes down, Ra enters the Duat to fight Apep. If a person fails Anubis' weighing he doesn't take them the rest of the way.
IJUSTMADETHEVOICEINYOURHEADYELL
I'M WORKING ON FITTING A FOREST OF MIMICS INTO A CAMPAIGN. I WANT MY PLAYERS AFRAID OF EVERYTHING FOR A WHILE.
Ardencroft
watch John Carpenter's The Thing for inspiration.
Sheepyhead
I had a campaign where we were attacked by a table and a chair. The half-orc carpented one of it into a neat Ikea set
MyLuggageAteMyHomework
I'm working on a Halloween campaign w/ a haunted hospital where the OR table is a mimic that restrains you. Then a dark cleric walks in
Almightytoad
I once used an entire room of animated objects. Like Beauty and the Beast, only less songs and more violence.
KingChadawg
For some reason when I read this at first I thought you said a forest of midgets and I thought wow that would be intense
BMcAttack
Two words. "Fuck" and "you".
LOV3L355
In our campaign we fought a door, that was a sticky situation
onlyhalfghost
Nonspecific deity above, that is bloody hilarious. Mind if I steal that idea?
fairybug
DUDE THAT'S AMAZING! Mind if I steal that for my campaign?
BronzeLeaguePro
Kill some of the players once, early on.
Colmarr
Now add will o wisps to attract the players to the forest by telling them a rumor that local forest has a buried treasure that wisps guard.
Dragonvcat
you think that's bad? My DM is addicted to mimic coins. chests are safe, gold coins need to be stabbed a few times to be safe now.
WizardMcMagic
Mimic river!
GregorCorgane
I'm not versed in the whole d&d thing, but what about a pseudo battlefield where all the corpses are victims of mimics posing as swords 1/2
GregorCorgane
And armor? ... Some of which is very enticing for immoral looters? 2/2
MajereDraven
Or have none of the forest act like a mimic until they are in the center. The whole forest is one giant mimic.
wasuremaru
Normal chests. Mimic treasure.
AnkhVersace
I had my players trying to find a rather unique item, there were two chests each with the same item in each. Never seen them so scared.
theScrewhead
5000 gp stamped with a king no one has ever seen. Each coin is a baby Mimic.
naytorin
And they're asleep, they wake up when you set down to camp for the night.
wasuremaru
One of my favorites was a shape shifting creature that was a dagger. It turned into a GP after it got into a backpack and caused them pain 1
wasuremaru
throughout the campaign. Would steal gems from them and make fake copies, would out-buy them at merchants, etc. Was really fun to use. 2/2
AlmostScientist
"I roll to pickpocket Anubis." hahahahaha that is totally D&D for you.
NotJuliaCaesar
I pickpocketed a musket someone was holding. I used my halfling powers.
borgmaster
Had a rogue that wanted to pick all the locks he could see. We had to fight an end campaign boss early because of that dude. No survivors.
borgmaster
fucker rolled a nat 20 on the damn lock
Chalybos
Yep, there's ALWAYS that one jackass.
MetaphoricalFox
Anything that isn't a 20 is a critical failure.
foreignbody
and then the following 30 minute argument between the same two people for the umpteenth time
JamesBluntThatSmartassCunt
God, it was always a fucking question about whether or not it was a charisma or something else.
JamesBluntThatSmartassCunt
*A charisma roll, or something else along those lines.
WachZilson
Every damn time.
lext
Or even more classic "I draw my shortsword and attack." Most D&D players will attempt to kill anything at least once.
AlmostScientist
Okay, we aren't all murder hobos bro.
nicholcm
My players were smart, they checked that they had a reserection available first - then they attacked
LiRivera
I want to play DnD so bad because it sounds f-ing hysterical.
DuckYofDooM
Look up the podcast the adventure zone !
Achillesdemur53
Roll20.com if you can't find a group. It allows for people across the country to play together, if your having trouble finding a group
AlmostScientist
One of our crew was a lvl 5 MS and so every time he fucked up we were like "Fucking Mage Slayer back at it again" (2/2)
AlmostScientist
it is so fucking hysterical, I played my 3rd legit game on Sunday and we have a running gag about Mage Slayers being the worst people. (1)
TheWombatStrikesAgain
"What would you even want from him?" "Oh, nothing. I just want to see if I can do it."
keioto
"You find 12 gold pieces and a rag that smells of a FORT save"
TheWombatStrikesAgain
"To be precise: A FAILED Fort save."
keioto
They could roll another ⊝
AlmostScientist
that's a 9...Anubis catches you and casts you into the realm of Ammit to be devoured.