iOS13
105365
1465
72
Sep 12, 2017 10:40 PM
iOS13
105365
1465
72
Ninjibacon
It can be hacked to do the dishes too
craze
I will just not connect mine to the internet. (did I type that on social media for all to see?)
AlwaysFavoriteAsian
...(mumbles under breath) still gun' get one tho.
Kitastrophe
I think my current biofuckbot is plotting the same so wtf
iamthisguy247
But like...after, right?
Tymich92
Well now I really want one.
TormentedPenguin
much like my EX...
KirbyMcBadass
I'll take my chances.
oenomaus
I'm here for a good time, not a long time.
anonjustforthisone
I asked my wife if sex with a robot constitutes cheating. She said no!
sircowdog
Someone watched the first 5 minutes of Ghost in the Shell.
Ensano
Still would
LieutenantPervertReadyforDuty
She's gonna make a new hole... >_<
TyrdCrapply
So are there going to be male robots?
Thefordmechanic
thevenomhippo
electro gonorrhea the noisy killer
FromDenmarkWithHate
Firecrackers: The Silent Killer
ThePornhubTitle
Good. I like it when they fight back.
taztreacy
At least I'll go out with a bang same way I came into the world !
grandpascabbage
Like anything your dad did could be considered a "bang."
Cooverdam
And if your Aunt had a dick she'd be your uncle
dietderpsy
Turns the fun port into a pencil sharpener.
localdisturbance
Death by snu-snu
johnnydarkko
Noblert
Its a risk I'm willing to take
heartlessninja6
Better than marrying a robot who just sits outside the bathroom judging you while you use IMGUR.
ThisIsANewName
"If someone programmed you to jump off a cliff, would you do it?"
grandpascabbage
Yes. It'd be my program.
ThisIsANewName
https://imgur.com/GDZd8g7
notme222
I choose to believe what I was programmed to believe!
ThisIsANewName
Mumbo, perhaps. Jumbo, perhaps not.
fastjeff
What, again?
w0od
I suppose this could be better than bled to death by state and ex spouse
TheSpeakerOfTheHouse
So you're saying my future wife may be about as trustworthy as an organic model?
Kitastrophe
Moreso! She'll kill you if someone hacks in and tells her to. A meat version could be convinced to kill AND could come up with it herself
typicallurkerlikelyshitposter
At least I'll have had sex.
QuackQuackAttack
Eeh, not really. Flashlight ain't pussy
vaktmastare
Fleshlight on the other hand..
QuackQuackAttack
Ha, still not pussy
rezpawner
It's only useful for increasing your stamina. It's not a substitute.
aznanimality
BUT ITS ALL I CAN GET. *cries into $5000 sex doll*
myfirstaccountwasshadowbanned
Still wayyyyy cheaper than the real thing at least.
rezpawner
I've got some great news for you, dude. $5000 will buy you a lot of poon from real life women! - or men. $5000 is $5000.
ChronologicalMyopia
Don't network your sex robot. Duh. I mean, we've all seen Battlestar Galactica, everyone should know what's up.
pancreas
In Dark Matter someone just programmed a sex android to find the protagonist crew and seduce/kill them.
nouseforaheart
oh god yeah that was a funny episode!
HessianGhost
It will come networked by default for no good reason. Just like the rest of your technology wanting to be interconnected.
Kitastrophe
so you can share it on facebook, obvs. Ted Cruz that shag.
TheSpeakerOfTheHouse
I haven't. I couldn't watch it because of sci fi novels ruining the genre for me by making me demand some realism.
TheSpeakerOfTheHouse
Couldn't watch Star Gate or any Star Trek after Next Gen, either.
VoiceofDiedrichBader
Felt the same after Next Gen but I kept going through all the series and it's worth it, Even ENT but I strongly advise to always skip the 1
VoiceofDiedrichBader
Intro song, trust me. Stargate is a great show too. O'Neill is a great character with a fucked up story but always brings the dry humor.
ChronologicalMyopia
Star Gate the series or the film? The series is *very* campy but mcguiver is great. The film is fantastic. StarTrek DS9 is worth a watch.
TheSpeakerOfTheHouse
I saw Star Gate as a kid, so it's different. I watched some of DS9 but it always felt like someone playing dolls house with Star Trek.
grandpascabbage
Your sex partner could also just choose to murder you without being programmed.
Soviet74
Even she can kill you later with STD without you or her know it
grandpascabbage
Smart people know they have STD's. Get tested between each partner.
Loompafoo
Or are they.....
grandpascabbage
The actual hosts?
TheOneTrueJoebot
Can I reprogram my sex robot to murder my sex partner?
grandpascabbage
It's cheaper than hiring a hit man, surely.
AZGrowler
grandpascabbage
Palmela Handerson can still kill you.
DerangedMoosh
Usually you have to do some things to them before they try to murder you. Usually...
grandpascabbage
I'd put more stock in a human murdering you than a sex bot.
DerangedMoosh
With our current sexnonogy yeah.
Pappicus
Especially if you buy a sex bot.
DorthLous
Not as if she's taking advantage of the facilities right now...
grandpascabbage
We use the sex not together. "A family who fucks robots together, stays together" is what my grandpa always said.
grandpascabbage
*bot
JoeBobBriggs
Or worse she will just ride your ass about stupid shit for the next 40 years or until you just cant take it anymore and end it all.
grandpascabbage
Divorce exists for a reason, sir. Though I imagine you're the kind of person who will think anyone is nagging you.
JoeBobBriggs
Which means you lose most of your shit and kids because courts treat women better then men.
grandpascabbage
That's usually true. I'm sorry that you're stuck in such a shitty position.
BigSecksi
There was programming involved. Done by her monumental fuck up mother. Thank god she only had a 4" blade. Dont put your dick in crazy!
grandpascabbage
Sh! Don't tell my partner that last bit.
BigSecksi
No worries. No one listens. Thousands of people are out there putting their dicks in crazy as we speak. Carry on Crazy!
grandpascabbage
I'll be riding on, thank you very much.
[deleted]
[deleted]
grandpascabbage
I use a shark vacuum too.
Ghost0fDawn
what if I program my sex robot to kill my sex partner?
grandpascabbage
It's a bit less illegal to just break up with them.
IDontAgreeWithAnything
I already have been murdered. Damn cheating ex wife!
grandpascabbage
Buy a bot! They'll never cheat! (Just kill.)
IDontAgreeWithAnything
The bot will just lay there like my ex and kill me after? Sounds amazing
grandpascabbage
It sounds like lucked out with her cheating on you. Now you can find someone who doesn't just lay there.
IDontAgreeWithAnything
Ha
buthejustsaidwoo
Statistically your sex partner is already the person most likely to kill you
notme222
TIL I'm immortal!
grandpascabbage
So I should kill mine first? Just to be safe...
TheWarHymn
Can confirm.
areallycreativeusername
Well yeah, suicide is considerably more common then murder
brankthefunny
Ohhhlookaunicorneatingasamurai
"Why you little!"
HD226868
The solution is bovious: Have sex with nobody.
grandpascabbage
Don't worry, your sex partner will still have to be used to pull the trigger.
HD226868
What? I don't - how is that at all a response to what I wrote?
grandpascabbage
You masturbate with your hand. Which you will then use to kill your self.
Greymalum
Better up your game then. If you don't produce you might get the noose.
grandpascabbage
I need the noose to produce.
Greymalum
The old choke and stroke. I use to think it had something to do with plane engines during the Great War.
grandpascabbage
Nope, just my orgasms.
Beepity
Sweet, I'm immortal.
Beepity
:(
CrazierConspiraciesThanTrump