1lear1
130704
1731
15
I.do.not.ever.want.to.walk.up.on.this
Dec 15, 2022 1:18 PM
1lear1
130704
1731
15
I.do.not.ever.want.to.walk.up.on.this
MAN9000
That's at least forty bananas long!!!!
JCBalance
How snakes do planks
Otomasoteraph
It's like space program for snake, the SNASA
MizWeirdo
jskoggs11365
Nosy nope rope
streetcatz
Tree fiddy?
IDoPictureStuff
The neighbour's are arguing. Seems like Greg got caught cheating and his shits being tossed to the driveway. Can't miss that
ghotinchips
I know a lot of snakes are beneficial to the environment but my lizard brain wants their heads separated from their body when I see them.
4thwalled
Oh fuck yeah. I know and appreciate their place in the ecosystem, but goddamn to I want them yeeted into the sun.
CMBarnes
Someone never skipped neck day
oldguyexlurker
I'm gonna need a banana for scale and plane to get the hell out of that country.
Freeasabird2015
schwaulen
That's a strange giraffe.
technofiend
When you refuse to pay ticketmaster prices and just watch Taylor Swift over the fence.
711isAnInsideJob
It simultaneously has the high ground and the low ground. It can't win yet in unbeatable.
711isAnInsideJob
*is
Ryebread91
How do we know the Loch Ness monster wasn't a pic of a snake?
satanscott
isphot
I can hear this gif
CthulianDreams
Viagra in wastewater is a serious issue.
cre8majic
poor snek couldn't coil for hours
CanadaDryGingerMale
He lost an eye and moved into a pair of trousers
fuehrSleepVoter
The 3 P's would happen to me. Poop. Pee. Pass out.
swiftkid66
Must be the morning.
QueefMalone
WorkSnakes
Haha oh you
MahadmaGaudi
MoxieCat17
I hope this is just a perspective thing because if that's taller than me, I give up on life
Nim449
well then can we have your stuff?
MoxieCat17
You have a lot of fucking laundry to do. Good luck.
onepinksheep
That looks like it might be a king cobra, so chances are it *is* taller than you.
MoxieCat17
Christ.
homoerection
Ain’t gonna help you with this one
MoxieCat17
Why would anyone worship a god who can't even help you with snake-based miracles.
ThomasThundersword
tbf, he *can* but only if contact the head of the snake removal department. St. Patrick will happily take your call.
Feralkyn
King Cobras are pretty chill, tbf. They don't want to pick a fight with you. They'll just kinda roam around and look for other, more
Feralkyn
dangerous (to you) snakes to eat!
MoxieCat17
Look, any snake thats standing up 6 feet isn't looking for another snake to fight.
Feralkyn
They actually eat the really dangerous cobras :D
MoxieCat17
Haha, thanks for making me slightly less horrified
hitdog42
The nopest of ropes
SergiousMaximus
"Look at me, I'm a skinny brachiosaurus!" Monty the Python
AnonOmis1000
Holy shit that's a great name for a python
JohnnyLawlessEsq
Non-zero chance that's a king cobra. They're all over the fucking place in India.
bridgebrain
That'd be a huge friggen cobra. Might be a perspective trick, but that looks like a VERY big snake. The standing section alone is maybe 3'
AnalFistingPornstarLegendWolverine
King cobras typically measure 10-12', but can reach up to 18' in length.
bridgebrain
Well that's a thing I never knew. Nature's beautiful and terrifying
JohnnyLawlessEsq
That’s totally king-cobra sized.
AnalFistingPornstarLegendWolverine
Not a whole lot of non-cobra snakes I know of that "stand" straight up like that, you might be right.
AnalFistingPornstarLegendWolverine
*except of course, the trouser snake.
JohnnyLawlessEsq
Username checks out, I suppose.
HUNGmunculus
shyasen
Ba dum tssssssss
ThePunishersVengefulBrother
My roommate had a python who got out of his enclosure. Came home to the snake staring me eye-to-eye from the stairs. Noped out to the bar.
mcmachack
Ball Pythons are cowards though.
ThePunishersVengefulBrother
Yeah, but not my snake, not my problem.
SerenePrincess013
I understand the fears around snakes, but if your roommate's snake greeted me like my cat just does, I'd pat his head & head to my room.
ThePunishersVengefulBrother
It was a nice snake; I had just had a long day and didn't want to deal with it.
SerenePrincess013
Pets are like children: some days, it's just better to brew the coffee in the sink, dunk your head, & hope for the best possible outcome.
DrJakeHerb
smegmaspread
ThatSceneWithElisabethShue
Better not.
WorkSnakes
Im not saying this is fake, but it does not look real either
FatBastardVegetarian
How much of a snake's body can be elevated?
SnekID87
About 1/3 of their length, depending on species, so this one could probably get higher if it wanted.
WorkSnakes
PurpleishFluffDragon
Rope Scope
HalifaxEast
Nope Scope
Frederf
360 Nope Rope Scope
OldsterBabe
Nope Rope Scope. Never, I hope.
switchport42
-the pope
OldsterBabe
What a dope!
MrPowPow
“I’m an extinct sauropod bring me treats. No! Don’t look behind the hill!”— grifter snake
scottEkarate
"Pardon me, do you have any buns hun?"
Jimmah1
Nah, that anaconda don't want none
darthstormer
Snek: the fucks goin on over there?
sochilln
bobthefunny
https://imgur.com/ok12VdK
ChemicalCookies
Jinn4119
“The fuckssssss goin on over there?” Fixed that for ya ;)
Howdidjadewdat
Charcharm
I fucking love you
shyasen
Something very much like this happened to me during my vasectomy. It was very awkward.
ch1ckensandw1ch
Good for you man, my vasectomy was more like a hiding turtle.
16bitStarbuck
shyasen
You heard me.
16bitStarbuck
Splitlicker
Once walked up on a blue racer. It did this & kept raising up higher as I got closer. It won. I backed away.
[deleted]
[deleted]
aintnothinbutahounddog28
Well then by all means walk right up to one so it can be terrified and you can be bit! Your comment is so relevant
coothlesscthulhu
My dog found a few black racers. I only saw their heads popping up once he alerted on them about 15ft away. Spooked me pretty good.
slushpig
I was hiking once and stepped on a blue racer “den”. Like 20 baby ones shot out. Freaked me out!!!
meskarune
I would have peed myself omg
Splitlicker
Wow!
BishlamekGurpgork
I would posit that you actually won that encounter by evading any losing condition.
Splitlicker
Well damn.
Shineupordown
good thing it wasn't the red one , they are super fast
HitandRyan
Every proppa ork knowz da red onez go fasta
justasimpleinternetfarmer
Red makes it go faster!!
Jayhatesspidersandshit
Even worse if you're wearing blue
Ultratoxic
Blue is...lucky?
Splitlicker
You people always make me want to stop commenting altogether but then I do anyway.
Ialmostgotthis
Dakka
TrixNStix
Boss ork 'e say red's wut makes us orks go fast, so we'z painted ourselves & our tankses red so's we WAARRGGHH
IamTerribleAtCreatingUserNames
Do you have a suggestion on where I should start learning 40K? Been watching YouTube. Shit is so good.
TrixNStix
Angry Marines and Orks absolutely destroy me with rofls - So fun!
TrixNStix
This guy produces amazing stuff: https://youtube.com/@majorkill18
IamTerribleAtCreatingUserNames
Thanks!
ZebraCockSandwich
I walked up on a copperhead twice in one hike (two different ones) The sun was setting so in the twilight I didn't see the first one until 1
ZebraCockSandwich
it was literally one step away. I stopped and said hello, it seemed busy tailing its breakfast but couldn't get a lead on it. I waited a 2/
ZebraCockSandwich
min but he just sat there, looking all around for the prey that was eluding it. Eventually I just walked around him. it was a narrow trail 3
ZebraCockSandwich
so I only had about 2 feet of leeway, but he was too busy to pay much mind to me. I said goodbye and not 10 feet later another slithered 4
ZebraCockSandwich
out of a bush onto the trail. I said hello to him too, but he was HOT on the trail of HIS breakfast, so after a passing glance he went 5/
Aksuuuh
Maybe it wanted belly scratches and tried to make it easy for you.
RealityInflicted
It's "scritchessssssssss" in snek.
Splitlicker
Yeah well, I took it as "keep getting closer asshole, see what you'll get".
Aksuuuh
A friend. ?
Splitlicker
You haven't spent much time in the outdoors have you?
Aksuuuh
What are you talking about I walk to my car to drive to Starbucks everyday.