"Put your own mask on first" (Please take care of you)

epicurusaquinas

143213

2926

https://imgur.com/gallery/cAppClq

This is not very "sexy" of a post and not really about making points. I made a post 7 days ago. Community Rules say it's okay to repost after 7 days. However, I think it's more helpful to add information.

At the same time, the more points and "Most Viral" then more people see it and could get help. So I guess I'm not sure what the hell I want for this post to achieve. LOL.

Anyway, here's a list of some phone numbers I found. I added the websites as well. There are people who care !!! Good luck !!! INTERNATIONAL: https://www.etherealandco.com/crisislinks

UNITED STATES - - - - - - - - -

Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696
https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline

Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255
https://www.facebook.com/800273talk/

Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386
https://www.thetrevorproject.org/

Sexuality (LGTBQ) Support: 1-800-246-7743
https://www.glbthotline.org/talkline.html

Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438
https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/help-support/contact-helpline

Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673
https://www.rainn.org/

Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272
https://www.facebook.com/missionhopebtl87/posts/grief-support-1-650-321-5272/553186221478413/

Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000
https://www.1800runaway.org/

Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253
https://exhaleprovoice.org/after-abortion-talkline/

Child Abuse: 1-800-422-4453
https://www.childhelp.org/hotline-impact-reports/

United States Elder Abuse Hotline: 1-866-363-4276
https://www.dshs.wa.gov/report-abuse-and-neglect

CANADA- - - - - - - - -

Canada Suicide Prevention Service: Call: 1-833-456-4566 (24/7) or text: 45645 (4 pm to 12 am EST)
https://www.crisisservicescanada.ca/en/

Kids Help Phone: Call: 1-800-668-6868 or text CONNECT to 686868.
https://kidshelpphone.ca/

First Nations and Inuit Hope For Wellness Help Line: 1-855-242-3310
https://www.sac-isc.gc.ca/eng/1576089519527/1576089566478
https://www.hopeforwellness.ca/

Transgender Crisis Line: 1-877-330-6366
http://www.translifeline.org/
https://ostem.org/page/crisis-hotlines

UNITED KINGDOM - - - - - - - - -

Samaritans (for any problem): 08457909090 e-mail [email protected]
https://samaritanshope.org/our-services/24-7-helpline/

Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): 08001111
https://www.childline.org.uk/

Mind infoline (mental health information): 0300 123 3393 e-mail: [email protected]
https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helplines/

Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): 0300 466 6463 [email protected]
https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helplines/

Help for England
Helpline: 0808 801 0677
Email: [email protected]

Help for Scotland
Helpline: 0808 801 0432
Email: [email protected]

Help for Wales
Helpline: 0808 801 0433
Email: [email protected]

Help for Northern Ireland
Helpline: 0808 801 0434
Email: [email protected]
https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/

Cruse Bereavement Care: 08444779400 e-mail: [email protected]
https://www.cruse.org.uk/

Frank (information and advice on drugs): 0300 1236600 Text 82111
https://www.talktofrank.com/

Drinkline: 0300 123 1110 (weekdays 9am to 8pm, weekends 11am to 4pm).
https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/alcohol-support/

National Association for Children of Alcoholics (Nacoa): 0800 358 3456
http://www.nacoa.org.uk/

Rape Crisis England & Wales: 0808 802 9999 1(open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail [email protected]
minicom 0208 239 1124
Our Helpline is LBTQ friendly
https://rapecrisis.org.uk/
https://www.stayalive.app/find-help-now/resources-by-area/wales/rape-crisis-england-and-wales/

Rape Crisis Scotland: 08088 01 03 02 every day, 6pm to midnight E-MAIL [email protected] OR 07537 410 027
https://www.rapecrisisscotland.org.uk/
(Languages Punjabi, Urdu, Mandarin, Slovakian, Arabic, Polish, French, British SIgn Language Video Info)

INDIA - - - - - - - - -
India Self Harm Hotline: 00 08001006614
India Suicide Helpline: 022-27546669
91-9820466726
http://www.aasra.info/helpline.html
http://www.befriendersindia.org/

SUICIDE HOTLINES OTHER COUNTRIES - - - - - - - - - - -

Argentina: 54-0223-493-0430
Australia: 13-11-14
Austria: 01-713-3374
Barbados: 429-9999
Belgium: 106
Botswana: 391-1270
Brazil: 21-233-9191
China: 852-2382-0000
(Hong Kong: 2389-2222)
Costa Rica: 606-253-5439
Croatia: 01-4833-888
Cyprus: 357-77-77-72-67
Czech Republic: 222-580-697, 476-701-908
Denmark: 70-201-201
Egypt: 762-1602
Estonia: 6-558-088
Finland: 040-5032199
France: 01-45-39-4000
Germany: 0800-181-0721
Greece: 1018
Guatemala: 502-234-1239
Holland: 0900-0767
Honduras: 504-237-3623
Hungary: 06-80-820-111
Iceland: 44-0-8457-90-90-90
India: 022 2754 6669
Israel: 09-8892333
Italy: 06-705-4444
Japan: 3-5286-9090
Latvia: 6722-2922, 2772-2292
Malaysia: 03-756-8144
(Singapore: 1 -800-221-4444)
Mexico: 525-510-2550
Netherlands: 0900-0767
New Zealand: 4-473-9739
New Guinea: 675-326-0011
Nicaragua: 505-268-6171
Norway: 47-815-33-300
Philippines: 02-896-9191
Poland: 52-70-000
Portugal: 239-72-10-10
Russia: 8-20-222-82-10
Spain: 91-459-00-50
South Africa: 0861-322-322
South Korea: 2-715-8600
Sweden: 031-711-2400
Switzerland: 143
Taiwan: 0800-788-995
Thailand: 02-249-9977
Trinidad and Tobago: 868-645-2800
Ukraine: 0487-327715

https://imginn.org › bamsara

@bamsara (angry asexual) instagram

FP Post Edit Re-Edit:

Thank you for the accolades!! I really appreciate it and thank you. The artist's message really spoke to me and my journey so I hoped others will get something from it. :-D

One commenter criticized the idea, pointing out the message "only take care of yourself" is bad. That is not the point of this message. To only take care of yourself is selfish. FIRST is not the same as ONLY. "Put your own mask on first" was my own title to imply you take care of others second sometimes. It's not an equation. It's not an either/or concept ( both is what happens ).

I hope you (every individual) takes something good from this post and the comments. Cheers !!

JustAFlamingoInDisguise

I've been suffering this for a few months. Know its my job (workload, no support and crap pay). Thankfully starting a new job next month

4 years ago |

WhatRaySay

Guilt is the most ever-present characteristic of my daily mental state. If you feel similarly, talk therapy has been a big help for me. +1

Yes. A good client-centered cognitive behavioral therapist is best. Freudian psychiatrists are not great for this kinda issue. Gd luck!

hamstock

Also drink water. Not soda or tea or coffee of sports drink, you need water.

TayOi

ihateeggs

This is why I left hospital nursing. Pre pandemic. Yet I still feel guilty I wasn't there to suffer with my peers

God bless you! (hopefully you take no offense, I'm not pushing religion) Your work in medicine helped so many. Now it's time for YOU. :-D

Thank you

HD2composer

Note to self: Great advice on Burnout

SmolTenk

The psychiatrist I worked for would literally write people sick notes to go on a hiking trip for three weeks or similar stuff >

just to prevent them from going into full decompensated burnout. Taking care of oneself is so damn important.

IMakeArtAndStuff

Mental well-being? In this economy? Fr though I'm not doing well ?

ARCHmatux

The main goal is not to be productive again? Guess I've been doing "recovering from burnout" wrong for quite some time then.

It sounds strange right? But relationships, having fun & resting in "balance" with productivity is the magic mixture! Each adds emotional +

positive value. It's not immediately obvious bcoz most societies FAR overvalue cognition (thinking) over emotional value. Truly we've poor +

examples & almost 0 education in communication, play & relaxing. Finally, everyone's "weight" (%-age) of each factor is unique. Doable tho!!

respectedleon360

Wow this.... this kinda messed me up. I've never related to a comic so much in my life.

Yes. It's cool art. Using a comic softens the message bcoz so little education on relationships, having fun & resting in balance with work.

iamanorangutan

Thank you. I didn't know until now how much I needed this

My pleasure. Believe a recovering work-aholic, it's hard making a "Take a break" habit, but u can do it! Repairs body, relationships, etc...

BunnyGoesHopHop

American work ethic + fear of failure + little return (pay, benefits, ect) = Burnout. We're out there just killing ourselves for free.

MechKelly

Agreed. Most of my life I prioritized eating and sleeping properly. It's done wonders. My grades may have fallen a little but it didn't

Excellent. BTW your example is probably helped more people in reality than my post!

ChipWizard

Thank you.

It's my pleasure

roadhunter

*etc.

weirdcalculator

While we're at it, *withdraw.

jotchy

*&c.

applejacksrmoregooder

God I wish my brain didn't work like that. You? I just can't not see that shit.

yungdumpling

I needed to hear this today, thank you

brujababy

I needed to see this. I'm about to quit my job after hustling in my "career" for 12 years. One year post-partum, mental health is trashed.

I just started a new position that was a big "career boost" and 6 weeks in I can't do it. My body literally aches every day under my stress.

Cognitive behavioral therapists are less $$ than full fledged psychiatrists & no one knows how long it takes to fix. Ur unique. Don't rush.

iamspartan1262

I'm just so tired of putting on a brave face and knuckling down

I'm just so tired of being so tired

This is so so hard to get across to your friends & family, right? They immediately start mentioning THEIR similarities to yours which is +

not what you need rn. You need someone to LISTEN w/o making it about them. Seek a good cognitive behavior therapist. You can do this!!

SerenePrincess013

Hard to get a good therapist when the bulk of them are experiencing burnout, also.

Especially when kaiser hires maybe 4, for the entire city

Preach !!

At it's best social media COULD be therapeutic if ppl had communication skills. Unfortunately written comm is even harder than verbal. :-P

forthewoods

needed that, thanks! Exploded so often lately at work I have to attend de-escalation training next week o.O

SavageDrums

I work from home, 4 day weeks with 10 hour days. It's been a complete boon for my mental health.

I wish everyone would read your comment. When we work at home we start to kinda "automatically" rebalance rest, fun & relationships. Some +

folks need more time OR need new relationships OR some therapy help if very out-of-balance (eg not resting at all, no friends,..). Or a mix!

blackguard89

This is neede for lots of people me included, but sadly some of us have much more wrong than just burnout with us. Thank you nonetheless

OMG so right. There's many things in "mental health" buckets. Which bucket or (GOD HELP US) mix of buckets is tricky. Key is don't give up.

Oh .. and you're welcome it's my pleasure.

Im sorry btw, I dont mean to shit on your parade as it were, I just....It's a bit hard sometimes to be and stay positive with everything

Apology accepted. You didn't shit on it or me. This is a shit world and you just know it that's all. It's fucking tiring. :-)

aifeloadawildmoss

Needed this today. Thanks!

DildorTheMighty

I burst out laughing at eating once a day for weeks. It was a hysterical laugh, it's been almost a year for me.

CloudsandRainandSunandWind

(2) eating altogether. Maybe you can ask a friend to do that, too?

Oh shit. Why? Do you forget eating? In that case: a friend of mine tasked me with reminding her every day to eat something, else she forgets

Partly work, partly my fault. I don't eat before work, don't work long enough to get a lunch, get home a few hours before dinner so I wait.

DotcoreJetkill

Sounds like good advice, I hope I can take it

117

I think if you just try, it counts!!

CelticmoonKate

Its very good advice... that I will ignore and have another nervous breakdown to show for it. I estimate it'll be fairly soon too.

BTW, I'm a recovering work-aholic. Believe me you can do it! Making a "Take a break" habit pays off! Repairs body, relationships, etc...

IrTeknician

Thank you for posting. I needed to read this.

I sure hope it helps long term. It's my pleasure. Get help if you need it. Maybe even promise yourself & keep it. (Not attacking you. Sorry)

DogOfKingdomCome

I needed this. Now i will favorite and forget and continue my burnout cycle

Gosh I hope you don't. I was at work so didn't respond to comments quickly. You might wanna read "The Subtle Art of Not GIving a Fuck" or +

send me a chat message. Continuing the burnout could be serious danger depending on where you are rn. Ok? Just consider these 2 options. I +

am no therapist & no business coaching you. BUT I can point you in some general direction. The key is you can do this! Just need some help.

LittlePinkAnimal

It's no joke. One day I just noticed I couldn't read. My eyes would just skip around the page on their own. Turned out I had symptoms of

Exhaustion and burnout. Got taken off work for three months and given sertraline and diazepam for the first two weeks and then just

cjandstuff

"Got taken off work for three months" How did you not get fired and lose your home and everything? Let me guess, this wasn't in the US?

Oh lord no. Sweden. Was on sick leave for 3 months with 80% pay.

Pyrolillycherry

My jaw dropped when I read this. Did you get this b/c you got burnout from work, so it was like workman's comp? This is unimaginable here

Um, I don't know how to relate it to american terms, but you get it from the government and it's based on your salary. Then there are

Sertraline.

Hope you were successful. Many western countries & Japan have "puritan" work=worth values. Hard to make a "Take a break" new habit. Gd luck!

[deleted]

4 years ago (deleted Apr 2, 2022 11:43 AM) |

Japanese company for 16 yrs in senior management. I feel you.

JStengah

Do not set yourself on fire to keep others warm

547

NervAssEva

Fuck…

Much appreciated top comment! BTW, If a recovering work-aholic like me can make a "Take a break" habit, anyone can. Beats dep & anxiety! :-D

muffmunchies

This post is super applicable to ADHD also. We grow up under constant pressure to increase productivity and battle for executive functions.

CatofMelbourne

This.

GBspiral

But feel free to stoke your inner flame and burn anything as fuel that you can get.

isetprettygirlsonfire

I det myself on fire for fun and profit.

5uperu5er

Wulph421

I have rights.

magicalkiwi

If I don't set myself on fire for them, how will they know I love them enough.

brndrll

If you love something, set it on fire. Like a couch, or a pair of shoes.

Never heard this phrase before tonight. A lot of meaning.

LaughingDonkey

Yes. Let your partner and children starve and fend for themselves. I'm way more important than they are.

EuphCat

Burning isnt the only way one can shine. If you're a paper, you can be a drawing or origami. If you're a string, you can be a cloth or rope.

njjb00612

When you due from a heart attack they WILL be alone. Deal with it so you might live past 53, unlike my dad.

Or neglect your health and become a burden to them by 45-50?

Believe it or not, you can provide for your family without setting yourself on fire.

ThePastmaster

Better to let them starve after you burn out and die. Much more selfless. /s

Nah. You pay into a fat life-insurance policy and hope v2.0 is better than you were.

Lol, if I can afford life insurance then I'm in little risk of burning out.

I read your other posts' comments, you're smart. FYI: Your mask is "first", not "only". Can't help others if no "you" left. If that helps. +

FYI2: Partner/children leave if ur miserable. I'm semi-retired from corporate senior engineering management. Working 75+ hr/wk = $ + misery.

Truly glad you found your path. I love seeing those who have. Not sure of the 'Mask' comment.

SnakesKnee

All the downvotes are from people without family...

Nah, I've got a family. I just recognize that if I dont take care of myself they won't have me.

NarratesTheDarkerStory

or from people who are annoyed by straw man arguments.

And they assume I'm disagreeing with the sentiment. Which I don't.

What you wrote was beyond sarcastic into insulting. You basically called painted anyone who agrees with taking breaks as lazy & uncaring. +

And "And they assume I'm disagreeing with the sentiment. Which I don't." is not an apology. [ Hint of one, but too much pride to back down ]

textilelover

I have 2 kids and a husband I adore. I will take time to become a sane healthy person when I need it, else I'm a detriment to them.

I can be burnt out and still love my family...I resent the implications within your comment.

I get a feeling you're a hard working person w/ big heart. I hope in private you overcome the cyanicism. All humans need rest sometimes. +

No one is suggesting you only take care of yourself & no one else. You can actually take breaks & be more effective + better relationships.

COVID doesn't care if I've had to book and cancel 3 holidays this year. Im just burnt out and complaining into the void.

HonestCommentFarmer

Can I set other people on fire to keep myself warm?

AdrocThurston

@isetprettygirlsonfire care to answer this?

For sure

BEATandBLOW

Capitalism Explained

iCameWheniHeardYouBeatTheEliteFour

It's not business, I just don't like them

TacosAreDelicious

Asking the real questions

It's frowned upon

mthsdvn82

I thought I knew what I was doing and had things under control. How wrong I was (still awaiting official confirmation from my doctor) :(

Wow. Good luck. Seriously.

Thank you. Been home for about two weeks now and it feels like I'm slipping further every day even though I'm just relaxing (or trying to)

It's going to feel wrong for a long time. You're readjusting what's probably a life-long thought process similar to how you eat. Do you +

know the meaning of cognitive dissonance?

Yup (had to Google it to refresh my memory, though, head's not working properly at the moment). And I think I see where you're going ;)

DukeSamuelVimes

One useful thing I find is the realisation that getting a certain amount of rest, relaxation, food and even passive exercise us not enough

This whole thread shoulda been top comment or part of my post!!! Awesome.

to relieve physical or especially mental exhaustion, you have to be proactive to renew your energy by engaging in activities that give you

at least a minimum level of enjoyment *and* fulfilment, as well as a sense of dynamic variation. That is to say not watching netflix or

playing games or scrolling through social media but being active in constantly pursuing new and different interests or dedicated yourself to

interests that have a high level of dynamic activity. And you can say "I have no free time and no energy for those things", a) if you make t

he determination to do it, you will be able to make some time and b) they are things you need to start doing so you have more energy.

repetitive games, as in playing 4 hours of the exact same call of duty battles will drain you all the same, as compared to trying new games

and playing different stories if gaming is one of your interests, though if that is the case you need to make sure you balance it with at

Comments (212)