Thanks, Jim Jefferies!

Oct 22, 2016 6:32 PM

SidRay

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3499

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Better idea. Everyone gets the back half of the left armrest and the front half of the right armrest

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Thank you for this post!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I once got the middle next to a mom with child in lap. I got no armrests and a sleeping child's head in my lap.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

As a frequent traveler that never gets the middle, yeah, I agree.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

And thats why I fly first class, peasants.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I suggested this once on a travel forum and got nothing but hate for it.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

No. The aisle seat is the combat seat.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Or, and this is just a thought, you could JUST FUCKING SHARE LIKE YOU WERE TAUGHT IN KINDERGARTEN.

10 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 3

Fuck you I'll take what I want

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 5

A CUNT SIR!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

USA domestic flight, bring the smelliest food you can find, take your shoes off and act like its your living room sitting in sweats and PJs.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Dont be a cunt

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

A person's leg room is sacred. Don't be an asshole and stick your bag in someone else's spot

10 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

Or your fucking knee!!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Oh, and if you're in the wrong seat, please move. Trust me when I say that I'd rather sit next to no one than your big/skinny/young/old ass.

10 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Saw an argument on a plane b/c a guy sat in a seat that wasn't his. He told the woman who had that seat that he "deserved it more than her"

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Sounds good to me.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Was on a flight and they werent even using the armrest but i was too polite to even use it :(

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Aisle guy gets the armrest because he has to get up 3x as much up for restroom access

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

They have to get up 7 times as much. The Transit-Toilet Law states the more people have to be walked through, the more often one pees.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Thus for every 1 time the aisle person gets up, the middle person will get up 2 times, and the window person will get up 4 times.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Aisle seat all the way!

10 years ago | Likes 37 Dislikes 1

At 6"5' I don't even have a choice. Go aisle seats!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Yeah, my knees can't take the other seats.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I like the window to lean my head/look out. But if my row was stinky, I'd prefer the aisle to breathe into

10 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

It's the only opportunity for people watching I get.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Window for me, unless it's a red-eye. Nothing to look at anyway, might as well have aisle access.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I once had a guy request to switch me for the aisle because he wanted the room. hard no I booked the aisle so I could have the room.

10 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 1

Love when someone sits in your aisle seat and pretends like they just picked a random seat. Like oh I didn't know this seat was better.

10 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

And if the guy by the window won't give up your armrest.... https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=1&v=LNeEDCr_3KY

10 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 2

Thanks for that laugh +1 ol chap

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

This is assuming airline passengers act orderly. They don't, so I do what I must in order to survive.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Or or or airline companies should start making comfortable seating with plenty of space.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Wishful thinking.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

10 years ago | Likes 45 Dislikes 0

April 18th!

10 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

too legit

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Also, don't be a jerk to someone if they recline their seat in front of you. It's not in your lap, just let it go.

10 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 9

Agreed. I paid for that seat and all its functions; one of them is reclining. That seat's operational area doesn't stop at "fully upright."

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 2

I'm assuming you're pretty short. I'll have people slam the seat in front of me into my knees multiple times with me saying 1/

10 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

It's not going to go back any further, I'm too tall. It's like they think my legs will crush and move out of the way if they do it enough.

10 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

There should either be enough room to recline without compromising other peoples space or the seats should be fixed. Simple as...

10 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

What kind of plane or airline has those seating arrangements, like in the picture? Planes I've been on only have 2 rows of 3 seats.

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Depends on the size of the airplane and on the configuration of the airlines.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I've only been on one in the picture twice, once from Chicago to Denver (due to many cancelled flights) and the other from Boston to Paris.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I fly US to Australia quite often. The long international flight has three rows of three seats or 3-5-3.

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

3-5-3 should be considered cruel and unusual punishment.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

You're in need of some horizon-expanding. It's called a wide-body. Two aisles. Fly international and you'll be on something like this.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Yeah, I don't do international... at least, not any time soon.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

If you're ever on a Boeing 747, 767, 777, or 787; or an Airbus 330, 340, 350, or 380, it's a widebody. Domestically, they're rarely used.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

"Widebody" or long-haul aircraft (Boeing 777, Airbus A330, etc). 767s usually have 2-3-2 which I consider ideal.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

All hail Jim Jefferies

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Fuck that.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Yeah, I guess that sounds fair +1

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 2

We live in a society!

10 years ago | Likes 215 Dislikes 2

SERENITY NOW!

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

GET TO THE BACK OF THE PLANE!

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

I'm giving you the front half of the armrest though!

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You take the back and you take the whole fucking armrest

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

We're not ANIMALS!!!

10 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

You bitchy queen!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I got to drink with him after a show. Nicest guy. I bought him a drink and gave it to him. He asked if I "Bill Cosby-ed" it

10 years ago | Likes 25 Dislikes 0

I saw him on my 21st. I was bummed out cause I didn't know what bar he was going to after the show.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Did you ask if that would be as innocent as Bill Cosby rape, as far as rape goes?

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I gave a resounding "hell yea!" He smiled said "good, just checking" then slammed it down

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I got to drink with him too after a show also...him and Forrest Shaw. I couldn't believe it.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Which show did you go to

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Around march at casino del sol in Tucson.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I'm too poor for airplanes. Do bus/train/car etiquette.

10 years ago | Likes 92 Dislikes 1

If you hitchhike, don't forget the code

10 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

Stop peeing on everything.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

For fucks sake don't launch into a rant about your employer with absolute strangers. In a Seattle public bus, I got ranted at about 1/2

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

How Microsoft are cheapskates and don't buy thier parking lot employees windbreakers and how Mr. Allen throws swinger parties. 2/2

10 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Bus etiquette: don't ever ride a fucking bus. This is the proper way to handle the situation.

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Don't put your bag on its own seat.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Train etiquette: don't take up a four seater table with yourself, your bag and your laptop, you piece of shit.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

If you want to sleep, sleep on the ground.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Just watch Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The person with the most obvious mental illness or body odor gets the most space.

10 years ago | Likes 100 Dislikes 0

Yeah, don't be greedy

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Browsing on the bus. And totally unrelated I have an open seat next to me

10 years ago | Likes 29 Dislikes 0

Are you reading the comments out loud? That would do it. ;)

10 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

WHO YOU CALLING A PSYCHO!

10 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

*Suddenly has whole bus to self*

10 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Hahah. Or the jerk using fake mental illness and odor to their advantage.

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

"What's my secret you ask? Why... I always carry a small mustelid in my pocket."

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

One time me and my friend argued about the seats we were getting on the plane. Almost came to fisticuffs. We finally settled and as we geton

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

And sit down... A 300+ lb guy who smelled like complete shit sits down next to my buddy in the seat we fought over. That was enough for me..

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

we begin to get ready the take off.. The big guy pulls out a bible and starts preaching to my friend as we take off. Glad I gave up the seat

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

This is possibly the funniest comment I've ever read, I live by that rule

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Thanks, but I have to admit, it was a comment inspired by an episode of 30 Rock. Not the phrasing, but the concept.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Hahaha I should watch that show then

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Definitely, it's hilarious!

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

There are 2 middle seats on some planes. What now satan?

10 years ago | Likes 944 Dislikes 9

A fight to the death of course.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Also, don't lean back if the person behind you is very tall... please!

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

YOU POLITELY, YET FIRMLY, CUT THE OTHER PERSONS ARM OFF.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

politely

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Raise up middle armrest, and they get to bone.

10 years ago | Likes 35 Dislikes 0

The hunger games

10 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

Uhhh... only sell those seats to compatible amputee's?

10 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Be the bigger, dominating one and claim both. Bring a flag.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

be civilized adults... whichever one kills the other in hand to hand combat gets both rests

10 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Cough into your arm and then claim both armrests for yourself

10 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Your comment makes this post.

10 years ago | Likes 53 Dislikes 1

Thank you kind sir.

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Not a dude. But you're most welcome!

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Apologies m'lady.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Did you just assume your gender?

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Yes. For the last 51 years.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Assert dominance ,piss on both arm rest and stare with wide eyes the whole flight.

10 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Thunderdome. Two passengers enter, one passenger leaves. (and gets arm rest rights.)

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Then the two in the middle will have to do the polite 'I'm stronger than you' hold on the arm rest.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

DuH

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

One gets the middle armrest, the other gets to sleep on the first ones shoulder.

10 years ago | Likes 77 Dislikes 0

aww

10 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Vote someone off the island. Play Russian roulette until there are 3 people remaining. It's all in the safety manual.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Furthest guy in gets it because he's furthest away from bathroom

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Makes sense

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Double armrests?

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Flight to Paris I had this. It's always goddamn Paris. They lost my luggage too.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Mandatory cuddles

10 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Hold hands

10 years ago | Likes 707 Dislikes 0

10 years ago | Likes 64 Dislikes 0

perfect

10 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

And here I was going to suggest that someone loses an arm. Two kinds of people in this world, I guess.

10 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Sounds like satan

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

And hope for the best.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Username checks out

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

Does it?

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0