whydoispendsomuchtimehere
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Twitter twattering famous people
Jan 18, 2015 8:55 PM
whydoispendsomuchtimehere
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11073
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ICollectReactionGifs
i wonder how many people dis celebs just to get their tweet read aloud now.
ShisuiEE
McLovin sucks on chode!
outrecord
#3 isn't wrong...
SapiensMakeMeErectusNoHomo
Some of these, despite being rude, are so spot on.
ANotSoMomentaryTrip
Cmon now. Rajon rondo is OBVIOUSLY little bill!
IntelligentHippo
how can someone even think of insulting Tom Hanks??!! seriously, that guy is awesome
booinger
I like the one about Sofia Vergara with a dick her mouth.
giveittomestraightlikeapearcidermadefrom100percentpears
The Jessica Simpson made my laugh, i remember when she got pregnant she just ballooned! Like Violet Beauregarde, minus the turning blue...
SpitlessLlamaa
Larry King probably could work at gringots.
toofrenchforyourliking
Tom Hanks looks like he wishes he had that turtle sandbox.
ScientificBeer
Still think Sophia Vergara had one of the best responses
Pencillin
the one about dick in the mouth?
ScientificBeer
Precisely.
Thefluffybuzzard
Just me or is Emma Stone and Katy Perry really hot in these pics
Jbtruthiness
"Just me or is Emma Stone and Katy Perry really hot" FTFY
Burghguy
I love how the harshest criticism for Bill Murray is just "I don't think he's funny". That man is a national treasure.
YamatoIouko
Isn't this where the pumpyourbrakes.gif goes?
YouAreNowBlinkingAndBreathingManuallyAndHaveTheSuddenUrgeToYawn
Murray, probably: 'That's the least insulting insult I've ever received'
HeyItsFen
I know Tom Hanks owns a tropical island...but I feel like that one person is talking about Castaway.
Kalooki
I thought Castaway too
itsbobbybbaby
Snooki should just be happy she's still considered famous
ShabbaLife
I was surprised she could read
Bitcerto
This is a several year old image. She was barely even famous then. Now nobody gives a fuck.
Sauroctonus
Is she?
HughLaurie
I don't hate on Snooki, I hate on all the dick fart for brains that made her famous by giving more than 2 tenths of a shit about her life.
GrahamCrackerDick
I love watching that video of her getting decked at the bar. Terrible,I know.
ChewableJim
Well, she did make that deal with the crossroads demon.
Brinho
Yeah she did!
littlelum
You, I like you!
bancodespanko
What the hell is a snooki?
Efreeti
WHAT THE FUCK IS A SONIC
BrotherhoodOfTheTaco
http://imgur.com/RHcAOl6
waffliez
Wait a second
PlesiosaurWithElementsOfAnIdeaOfTheLochNessMonsterBoy
Gonna be honest, never watched Jersey Shore, I have no idea why snooki get's so much hate, I mean she's not bad looking, is she a bitch?
buttermyarse
Not really. She just decided to make as much money as possible off the back of that show which annoyed some people.
PlesiosaurWithElementsOfAnIdeaOfTheLochNessMonsterBoy
Who wouldn't if anything that's smart...
buttermyarse
Well quite. I'd say very few people would turn down the opportunities given to her. She's not very old either.
Jackospade
haterstotheleft
Just makin some popcorn.
Hybris51129
This is the only scene of Rosanne that I still remember from when I was little. The laughing never stops.
ByTheBeardOfSeuss
RIP Dan...
CastrovalvanCelery
No. The last season of Roseanne didn't happen. It just didn't happen, ok?
goodguyC
Is that the unfunny guy from the Redneck Comedy thingy?
goodguyC
Bill Engvall....the name I was looking for was Bill Engvall.
4thWorldAdam
No, but he WAS in Caddyshack!
goodguyC
Who is he?
tossabeertoyourwitcher
I'm terrified by how much the objects on the table are moving
ThisIsWhyIDontTrustPeople
The placemats under the objects are also under the arms of Dan and, I think, DJ. They move their arms. Place mats move. Objects move.
chowdurhead
OK, that's creepy...
NotSoMuch
The fact that Julia Louis Dreyfus is laughing hysterically only makes me like her more.
BeardedCoach92
The Larry King one is the truth
cr668288
The better one was: If you skinned Larry King and made it into leather, you could make a coat for every poor child in America.
BeardedCoach92
and also accurate
Furiou5
Emma Stone looks like she does smell like cat pee.
chaoswolf1982
Actually, in that pic, she looks like she can smell it, but can't tell where it's coming from.
SithRuleOfTwo
"run of the mill goblin" Im fucking crying
TheKindlyOnes
heh. Gravity falls. He actually voiced his own was figure, which is mistaken several times for "some kinda goblin man"
RichardDeanAnderson
The Kevin James tweet is on the money.
ncstarbuck
I recently watched an episode of King of Queens again. Good lord, Doug & Carry are the most dreadfull couple / people I could imagine.
devarian
i feel like it should be patreon instead of kickstarter. once kickstarter funds run low he might renege, patreon would keep it going.
pizzamagica
They should make an entire episode of this just with people offending Kanye West.
apocalypselove
yes! i would watch that shit
jacobmrley
That Strahan one is so perfect.
GrouchyMarx
I have a similar teeth gap both up & down row. Hearing stuff like that made me want to kill myself & caused weeks of depression. Still does.
ThatMomentWhenImgurJokesAreOnlyFunnyToImgurians
david blaine too, I read it in his voice, and it it put me to sleep
TheSara
My nephew: I bet you could slide a quarter through his teeth and ride on his back like one of those rocking horses.
everythingismelting
If that was a joke about me, I wouldn't even be mad, it's golden.
Chaostar
Thtrayhan
takeiteasybob
Anyone remember the ned's declassified episode where they showed what to do in that case?
PorcupineNamedFluffy
Saw your comment before the images actually loaded. Scrolled to the end to get to Strahan. Was not disappointed.
Isleepwithamagicblankie
I looked at his image first and was like "damn better be something about dos teeth" then it was.
CannonKnapp
Damn you for making me load past the first ten...
GrouchyMarx
I have a similar gap on my upper & lower front teeth. I've been insecure about it always, and if I'd hear something like that I'd die.
Parafairy
Michael has learned to love it. He refers to it as the Gap
buttermyarse
Some people can own it. I have a friend and her slightly gapped teeth make her face beautiful. Without it she'd be plain.
GrouchyMarx
Yeah, well, I can't. Being an visibly overweight man with other visual errors. I can't own it, I only look like an inbred.
jacobmrley
My father has that look, he always said it was a sign of virility. I guess you just gotta own that shit or go to an oral surgeon.
GrouchyMarx
I'd choose surgery if I weren't poor as fuck. It'd cost thousands of dollars and I'm someone who struggles to have enough to eat.
jacobmrley
Then I vote to own that shit. Or just tell people to look at your eyes more.
GrouchyMarx
I think that "owning that shit" is pretty much impossible when the rest of me is a 250 pound lardass with numerous other visual errors.
MetalJesus
He seems to agree.
ShoopDeDoop
He looks like he could slurp hotdogs like spaghetti.
LeftCollectionBlueBird
I wish my thighs gapped as much as his teeth.
Berethian
So... you want the cowboy walk?
anyusernameidontcare
Just going to throw a comment in here. ^^
couldnotretrievepassword
He got the London look
BusterBrownies
GEH DUH LUHN-DUN LERK
TheBootyJuice
Oh God those commercials...
UsePNGnotJPEG
HeyLookABunny
This always gets my upvote
Garce
Finish it! There is a last frame out there of that
UsePNGnotJPEG
JustASlightJingleOfPocketChangePulsing
TIL David Blaine isn't dead.
nerdingoutpodcast
*yet
smaug777000
twa
JustASlightJingleOfPocketChangePulsing
Twa?
smaug777000
It's from south park david blaine episode
OuweBoef
Yes, Kathy Griffin is definitely the daughter of Satan.
GreaterDog
And we all love her for it.
equityforpunks
I think she would totally agree with that. I think she even liked the tweet.
redsmerf
And Carrot Top is the son of Satan.
ddspill
Still love fire crotches though!
HughLaurie
I'd totally bang her if there was a way to do it without having to hear her speak at all the entire time.
yunafonfabre
I would previously have winced at this, but then I saw her ice bucket challenge and I'm all mmmmaybe ...
TheDemonCrowley
Hm. Wonder why Crowley's mom is a red head in Supernatural... Weird.
[deleted]
[deleted]
squidwardscissorhands
She exists only to drag Anderson Cooper down
YamatoIouko
Okay, now THAT'S too far.
MeridaIsMySpiritAnimal
I completely agree. The channel with her &Anderson Cooper is the only one we could stream on NYE. We had to mute it b/c she was so obnoxious
DMBFDP
On mobile. Accidentally reported your comment. Never happened before and I don't know what it means or what happens now, but my bad yo
dduncan55330
I reported it too for shits and gigs. Now we wait...
OuweBoef
Indeed love the honesty, but so far I haven't been banned so it all fine haha.
SystemPeanut
I've accidentally done that before. I don't know if anything actually happens with just one.
kapp70
Put it on hold to prevent others from seeing it until they can review it
kapp70
I think after 3 reports they (imgur) look into it to see if it actually is offensive and if to many reports come in quickly. They 1/2
SystemPeanut
I had heard that 3 reports just automatically removes it, but that could be abused, so it might work like you said.
F0rger
Love the honesty.
gzig
Translation: gibe monies
JonTargaryenKingoftheAndalsandtheFirstMenLordoftheSevenKingdoms
John Goodman is smiling slightly because it's true.
DVSBSTrD
And David Blaine does look like he's about to fall asleep.
DeckhandAdmiral
And he's just as much of a prick to do it.
QuantumSupersexposition
"Mmmm!!! This popcorn is delicious! *licks fingers disturbingly*"
imaginationhandicap
Ha! Classic Goodman.
HughLaurie
I bought the game "Rage" because he did a voice in it. I hated the game but still liked the character he voiced... because of his voice. :/
Warranty
I love him. I feel like he would be a cool dad.
Duttbick
My dad kinda reminds me of John Goodman.
charlietheratking
Most of these are somewhat true. Or totally true.
ButtersTheCat
Butter balls.
rxcthulhu
His thoughts : that's right... You just ate my balls... Bitch!
authweight
I read that in his voice. It was majestic.
ninjagaidensigma
http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lucn64sPv11qek00oo1_500.png
gtotherizzle
http://imgur.com/1f5eYHR
pizzapatrol
http://imgur.com/vSUKo8C
nomadicway
you the real mvp
BoiledDenim
Face swap?
NoStringsAttached
THANK YOU!!
imafungi
Thank you
ILoveCreamPies
UNCANNY!
KimJongUnceUnceUnce
that was probably the most legitimate observation there
JerryFromPornHub
Nah. David Blaine's voice is putting his face and all of ours to sleep.
KimJongUnceUnceUnce
i'll be honest. i don't know who david blaine is
tirusr
He's the guy who puts his face to sleep with his voice.
JerryFromPornHub
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Blaine
chemistrydoc
spuds31
HE'S. SO. POSITIVE.
InternetPointsAreUseless
Spaced?
ICannotDecideOnAUsername
Spaced.
60PercentOFtheTimeWorksEverytime
Legitimately LOL at this one. +1
lightandsteady
Thanks!
dunkaguru
hey its franklin do do doo doo doo
ClearenceClarence
Comin' over to play!
OutdoorHuman
I remember Beaver being such a bitch.
Expectopatronshots
http://imgur.com/WI7STYs
clutch2999
He always looked more like earthworm jim to me
DoNotGoGentleIntoThatGoodNightRageAgainstTheDyingOfTheLight
Hey it's Franklin, COMING TO YOUR HOUSE
stevenwonder
You are great.
adamran
I stopped reading this half way through just so I could go on Twitter and block the person who wrote that Bill Murray wasn't funny.
HughLaurie
I was going to, but then I remembered that I think twitter is stupid so I don't use it. Plus I get to see the tweets worth seeing on imgur.
sorrycannotbraintoday
Bill actually laughs at the "getting shot" part, says it's a good one. he thought it was funny, DO NOT ANGER HIM.
DasBeaker
And for you good sir!! An upvote!!
chowderisdead
koffeetime
Track down his address, post it and we.all him a glitter bomb!
Leoxcr
I know this is intended for everyone to laugh but I felt unnecesarily sad when he was shot in zombieland.
poet4nothing
http://imgur.com/9ZBJzuo
TomWaits4no1
Upvote! Scrooged. Fuck yes
Capsicle
Anyone who doesn't like Scrooged should go ahead and be hit with a toaster to decrease the surplus population.
poet4nothing
http://media.tumblr.com/5742760bc18e567c76ef1b5dc03548f3/tumblr_inline_ngfmd0dEIf1t2yz6y.gif
HowUnfortunate
That kid needs to pump his brakes.
HeyItsJP
That man's a national treasure.
PsychologicallyStablish
MagellannTheExplorerMalGanis
Expanded this thread specifically to find this. Good on you mate.
TomWaits4no1
I thought of doing the same thing. I should harass that guy. What an idiot
dickymchamhox
I applaud your dedication, kind lady/sir.
BDSMBlooddoll
Brad Paisley's a good guy. :(
YourM0therWasAHamster
I love his music. He seems like a really awesome dude
chipotleismylife
who cares, it's still funny
aWaveOfBabies
I don't know much about him or country music, but I do think it's really badass his cowboy hat is covering his one eye without him trying.
lovestohate
The wedding song my wife and I chose was "She's Everything". I love that song. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCjXaEbrLdw
BDSMBlooddoll
He sings a good few comedy songs. Want a link to one?
aWaveOfBabies
Sure, I'm always down for something new.
Dollymoo
"Ticks" has always been a favorite of mine!
BDSMBlooddoll
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwRrKaq0IyY
YouHadMeAtHell
That David Blaine one is one of the funniest jokes I've ever heard
CouncilmanJeremyJamm
That's my cousin. She's a comedian/writer
thedevil
The funny part is when he's not on tv he is the nicest guy ever.
helpusdrzaius
Yes I laughed
chaoswolf1982
True stuff is the funniest stuff.
flubberfucker
I'm sorry.
TheEmancipator
http://www.famous-people-search.com/david_blaine/david_blaine_picture/david_blaine_003.jpg
PPL1PACKAGE
Cheez-its! Cheez-its! Cheez-its!
cmc8290
What the eff!?
sunmoonstars
Get out of his childhood!!
BirdOfPlay
Sauce for the confused ones: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTqsV3q7rRU
HughLaurie
Stop putting orange soda in our mouths!
smaug777000
twa
SirJimmothy
How was this downvoted?
smaug777000
people don't know south park... twa
Helimech
He even sounds like he is falling asleep! Mr Monotone.
YouHadMeAtHell
HE'S even bored with his own tricks
Hexofin
I know a guy who sounds just like him it's hilarious.
ButtersTheCat
I'm not entirely sure David Blaine is human. Sleight of hand doesn't explain tricks like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rB0wzy-xbwM
CholesterolFree
I was SUPER stoned one day during a David Blaine marathon...... so many emotions...
MoskauHOHOHO
Right when he puts the knife down. That when he slides the card in there
ButtersTheCat
It's perpendicular to the way he sliced it, jammed into the pulp - I don't see how his hands could have accomplished that, moving like that
MoskauHOHOHO
he's a master sleight of hand. He could do it. There is no other chance he could have stuck something in there. It would have to be that tim
spittle
What the F.
ButtersTheCat
This one's even crazier: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dw0AOj12Exw#t=434
StupidFuckfaceMcCrapperson
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BVoiYZum9Zg
Alexagon
Logged in to post this, you beat me to it!
flythedirector
but if the card is rolled, is not hard enought to pass thru the lemon on the other side just pushing it with his middle finger?
ButtersTheCat
Perhaps. How about this one? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dw0AOj12Exw#t=434
flythedirector
damn, fast dude is fast! sometimes looks like luck, most of this are about speed...but the fly one...I think is science, the fly was 1/2
flythedirector
2/2 was exausthed, I think he may left some sugar fall from his hand, this work with the bees...
thedevil
This is one of the effects i close my act with. Very real and very entertaining but does take a lot of work to get it right.
8bitdan
But do you know the Aztec Tomb illusion?!
ThatMomentWhenImgurJokesAreOnlyFunnyToImgurians
so the only possible way is to have the card already in there, and then do your trick. giving that the trick ends in only one possible card
thedevil
Whatever you say hunny.
spacecadetout
Are you a magician? Might be cool to do an AMA. I've always been curious about the training and practice.
thedevil
I am a semi-pro magician. Honestly if there was enough interest i would consider doing an AMA with the caveat that i wouldn't reveal secrets
spacecadetout
i'd read it!!
spacecadetout
I still haven't forgotten about this! I hope you do an AMA or something similar.
cmc8290
I always upvote magicians. My boyfriend is a professional magician and does that effect as well.
thedevil
Is his name Chris?
cmc8290
Negative. Is yours?