sleeperkid
11673
780
10
Sep 14, 2025 3:58 AM
sleeperkid
11673
780
10
joepineapplesindrag
roughingupthesuspect
Kash Patel was still high on molly when the kids dad turned him in…
RealityInflicted
The way Trump fucks the US, isn't he really all our daddy? *Valhalla Patel, probably*
B3N15
Donald will claim he cracked the case and collect the $100k reward himself. He needs walking around money
spiderjohn36
Brooke Singman is so full of shit she's perfectly qualified to be Trump's next press secretary.
terrywat5
Patel could seek him here, seek him there, without moving his head, fortunately the shooter was handed over by his father.
thornedrose27
Yes. His Dad turned him in.
ShitIstoleFrom4chan
I mean, his credentials for becoming FBI director was that Trump liked the guys podcast. Yes the FBI director is a podcaster, and the health secretary believes Tylenol gives you autism.
cre8majic
His parents urged him to turn himself in and not become a vigilante target on the run
RatsLiveOnNoEvilStar
Even if the guy haven’t turned himself in, I’m sure if the full force of the FBI was used for every murder, it would be resolved just as quickly. It’s amazing what can be done with that kind of resource.
GrumpyMe
Don't know why he'd do that. Poor old Kash was lookin' all over the place 🤭, when Daddy snitched!
Che07
"Always good to have someone on the top who can look in two directions at the same time", some FBI-ler, maybe.
bourbonandbaddecisions
If he wasnt turned in by the family they would still be looking for them. Their investigation was the equivalent of a modern day keystone cops movie.
MajorNikon
Kazpur81S
Kash was looking for him in fancy dining restaurants in DC
greatn0rth
The ass kissing is so completely beyond parody. It is so fucking embarrassing.
bobbsr
I bet his dad doesn’t get the $100K Reward.
wandermanspacebot
The government isn't going to give you 100K for being a bad parent.
Rauca
One thing that bothers me......
He was seen on CCTV jumping off the roof, no rifle in hand. He didn't fling it off first either. How did the cops then find it wrapped in a towel in the woods ?
Rendova
That jump off the roof had that John Wilkes Booth feel. Half expected him to get a horse and ride off, Western style.
jamiedBreaker
I'd also like to know the answer to this
PerthAussieMike
I'm not going to watch the Fox interview but I would wish that one of the reporters had said to Trump after his boast of what a good guy Patel was, 'Mr President, you do know the boy turned himself in don't you? The FBI did not capture him. I now resign before you get me fired for telling the truth'
Nathanyel
But they walked really fast to the car after they got the call!
sufferinsuccotash
Oh man, if only
eddbrowne
Pretender Patel had no cause to be on site & draw attention from the real work. But Putin give the orders.
writerbuddy
The dad was a secret FBI undercover agent, aha! Release the Epstein files, Kash.
FreePalestineAndTheWorldFromIsrael
If only they were this quick to investigate everyone on the Epstein files.
Ekaris9
Speak truth to power. Always. If nothing else, it is great for a laugh.
Scotchonice
Googly eyes couldn't find his ass with both hands. Does he really think Nordic good ol' boys club would welcome him to Valhalla? Nope.
PrincessWasabi
And you have to die in battle to go there lol
OperatorWay
> Scotchonice : "couldn't find his ass with both hands"
...but he can find his boss's ass with both lips.
mothmam
The irony of Christofascists name-checking a Pagan afterlife location is insane.
RoutemasterFlash
Patel is from a Hindu background, as people named 'Patel' tend to be.
mothmam
No shit. But when you work for them you count as one of them.
RoutemasterFlash
The "Christofascist" element of the Trump regime is often overstated, I think. Sure, it's an element, but only one element. How religious do you think Trump actually is, for example? Or Musk, for that matter (if you consider him still part of the regime, which is debatable).
I'm sure there are some true believers high up here and there, but for the most part it's a marketing con to get Evangelical voters on board.
PutItInNeutral
The kid hinted/admitted to his family that he did it, the dad told their minister. The minister ratted him out. The kid then went and turned himself in.
organiclife3
That's some damn fine police work by the FBI right there
Rendova
Did not ministers/the clergy have some oath to confidentiality. Not excusing the murder, just what is the current status of clergy confidentiality?
thatiscomedygoldrightthere
"Will no one rid me of this meddlesome priest?"
BenjyX55
So the priest fucked the kid? Wish I could say I was surprised.
reichstein
Well it is the main thing that they do.
georgejimmydoodle
He's not a child. No matter how hard the right is trying to make him out to be not criminally responsible.
PutItInNeutral
Kid, go sit over there on the Group W bench.
SnowpersonHitInTheFaceWithALackOfCreativity
Stop calling him a kid. He's a 22 year old fully grown man
PutItInNeutral
Legally, yes. He's an adult. Personally, I am almost 50, so to me he is still a kid. Hell, he's the same age as my daughter.
sabrinadiesatdawn
I'm gonna be honest with you, as I age it becomes increasingly harder to think of anyone under the age of 25 as an adult.
maday1br
Been 22. Bit older now. They're still kids at 22.
I get that he's a legal adult. I even think he should be treated as a legal adult. The thing is, he's a very young-ish kind of adult. Like a kid.
Muffyns
Eg compared to the 80 yr olds running your country 22 is still just a kid
AttentionDeficitHyperDepression
Somehow the 79-year-old in the Oval Office is still a damned toddler, too
RoutemasterFlash
You could say the same about a 40-year-old, though, couldn't you?
thickythickydumdum
By 40 you have some idea what's up...we were all mostly still morons at 22 by comparison
RoutemasterFlash
Some are still morons at 40, though (or even 80).
The point is that a 22-year-old is a young adult. Not a child and no longer even an adolescent.