ThePhoenix007
208763
7789
98
Aug 21, 2016 12:39 AM
ThePhoenix007
208763
7789
98
giadiniera
Norgoth frostblood has come down from the mountains to shitpost on FB
whydidyoureadthis
I thought this was a Ken M type thing here
DingenForester
I totalled my car and walked out without a scratch because of my airbag
JamieG196
I'm pretty sure the background is photoshopped to add motion blur. Look at the bottom-right corner of the window. The car is stationary.
soejmud
I am reasonably confident they may deploy at far lower speeds. And cause more injury than they prevented. Still saves lives.
Pyrofer
They deploy at impact, The expand at hundreds of miles an hour. It was poorly worded.
sirBubba
Norgoth Frostblood looks like a white Snoop Dogg
loafusofbread
Who took the photo? Was it natural selection?
NERDRAGEohacat
No professional photographers by the name Natural Selection, I'm afraid (look at the side-view mirror, they're not even on the road).
Zixtank
Brandin Canterbury is a pretty awesome name.
vinylzombie
I was just staring at her legs, what's this all about?
Webelos8
Has anyone commented about NORGOTH FROSTBLOOD?? I expect better of you all.
TheKidCap
Omfg "Norgoth Frostblood"
CorneliusCornwall
If you ride with your feet on the dash you're nasty.
fleethead
Clearly trolling
ThatOneGalFromThatOnePlaceThatYouTotallyKnow
They told me I could be anything. So I wanted to become a contortionist.
res21171
Ah-huh-huh-huh.p
SparetimeLegend
Who the F lets someone put their feet on the dash of their Mercedes?
xXUndeadArrowXx
Maybe then she can see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch
KingCahoon
Man that's Freakin golden. Good job
TheKrombopulosMichael
You could easily predict what Norgoth and Jesse would say just by looking at their profile pics *tips fedora*
Rachelashkey48
Natural selection blah blah yeah who the fuck is taking this picture inside a moving car when both that guys hands are on the wheel?!
Darkdaynight
Wow, didn't realize there was so much salt for feet on the dash
astrangehop
I see how it could be unsafe, why would it be gross? Do you have a bunch of anti tarentinos here?
Frumph
.. no seatbelts either, they're dead regardless
EricAndEmily
Norgoth Frostblood.........
InvoluntaryEuthanasiast
No one else mentioned it! I thought I was going crazy
gynonurseifixyourladybits
First name Neanderthal, last name....legendary
SerIceTheDemon
"norgoth frostblood" damn
yourmomisminenow
If I was that dude, I would really strongly consider bitchslapping her for putting her feet ON MY GOD DAMNED DASH
Feldspartacus
I really wish more people understood how natural selection actually works, and would stop equating it to just dumb people dying.
Pyrofer
If all the dumb people die, only the smart ones are left. That is EXACTLY how natural selection works. What else do you think it means?
Feldspartacus
More dumb people are havung babies than are dying from being dumb
Feldspartacus
Some dumb people dying does not constitute an environmental influence that changes the evolutionary trend of the whole species.
jallupinya
viila
...but why?
ElRadis
Natural selection at work
Xen300
Natural selection typically involves the inheritance of an alteration to the species's phenotype through reproduction, but OK, airbags...
PFCWintergreen
dumb people die, no dumb people to reproduce...like elephants and tusk size
Groznek
I think it's unilaterally creepy to talk about "natural selection" when referring to human beings.
mcminnow
But humans are a product of natural selection
BushelOfLabeouf
Agree 100%
mcminnow
Just really curious why you think natural selection doesn't apply to humans.
PerhapsAnotherPerspective
Thank you. It's fucking terrifying how often it's done.
mcminnow
Why?
AntonioStark
It's called get your fucking feet off of my dash you uncultured swine.
CoolioStallone
This
ccar0362183
Too bad I can only upvote this once.
Zombraina
The first time I heard about the feet-on-dash-airbag issue they said that it will break your legs, then your broken legs will hit you in 1/
Zombraina
in the face. It's horrible but I laughed so hard, it was a funny visual to me. /2
mrnobody93
So glad someone said it
WallyBro
What's worse is toe prints on the windshield and a femur stuck in the car seat
Sporkeldee
God. This. Shit never comes off.
twicetheheart
my husband loses his mind when he sees other people with bare feet on the dash. i thought he was just weird, apparently not
yourmomisminenow
I have killed people for less than that.
absentmindedwhimsy
My husband also loses his mind when he sees people with their feet on the dash. You're not alone.
almostsomething182
No. No he is not.
TooLazyToDoSomethingElse
You put your feet up on my dash, bare or otherwise, i'm kicking you the fuck out of my car.
Sporkeldee
No, I'm not even a guy that keeps his truck meticulously clean. If you put your nasty feet on my dash or windshield I'm kicking you out.
yourmomisminenow
the fucking windshield one really really grinds my gears. Even with hands I get so mad.
Counterfit
I helped my grandmother clean the windows in her car one time. The *very next day* she wiped some fog away with her bare hand. -_-
yourmomisminenow
that's when you say "grandma no"
whothehelllitthefuseonyourtampon
you forgot "off the dash of my Mecedes"
HolleyRagnarok
yep, freaking disgusting when people do it
astrangehop
Wha? How? Do you eat off of the dash or something?
51rebaS
No, but I still don't want peoples nasty feet touching every surface. Keep yer feet on the floor where they belong.
HolleyRagnarok
nope my dash doesn't allow such activity :P but seriously, feet by themselves are repulsive, but also what @51rebaS said
Euffy
Feet up in all possible situations! I feel extremely uncomfortable having to sit with my feet down, like with a regular chair. Always have.
artbyraincoats
Have you ever been tested for heart problems? My bro has a heart defect and his heart has trouble pumping so he crosses his legs. It is 1/2
Euffy
I was actually born with a heart condition, which I've since had an operation on so should be fine...I wonder if they are related though!
artbyraincoats
easier for blood to reach every part of your body when you hold your legs up. It's why they say to curl into a ball if you feel woozy.
Metalhead47
Feet on the airbag AND no seat belt. Well on the good side she won't take up much space at the morgue.
howaboutthisonethen
Just take a second to think this out. She either sits place and gets fucked or flies out the window. Not both.
sangman
Savage
CheekyBreeki
Just a jar will do.
remindmetostopprocrastinating
Let's not forget, texting while driving. Natural selection trifecta
SpitefulRed
She's not driving, the boy behind the steering wheel is
remindmetostopprocrastinating
Still dangerous tho - he might be super-distracted with what she's writing
MohamedAlsaidi
Natural Selection at its finest
CheapBeerAndBadDecisions
some assembly required
Axewhipe
uwantsomelightlyfriedfishfillets
Goodness
computerphile
Her loved ones can also save some money seeing how small coffins costs a lot less than big ones..
GreenAce92
saves on the coffin
SsSsSs111112232
Also someone is hanging from the window to take a picture, super dangerous to hang from car windows.
LavaAxe
^ natural selection
drunkandsmoking
80% sure this is a stock photo photoshopped to illustrate teen driving. Not that kids don't drive like this.
SsSsSs111112232
Stupid no seat belt teen driving, no normal teen driving.
ArdentSlacker
Yeah, but if her bag leaks, someone's gotta clean that out.
MetroidPrimeHesTheBest
Compact car with a compact person in it
darkwyverna
I was just in a bad car crash and seat-belts and airbags saved mine and my father's lives. Please don't be morons.
Cerinna
Just never put your feet on the dash.
darkwyverna
Or cross your legs. Mine were crossed and I ended up with one leg out the window from impact. >.<
Cerinna
What, really?!
darkwyverna
Leg was still intact, the window had broken on impact so the force threw my leg out the then open window. It was a bad crash. :(
Cerinna
Oh no... That sucks! Are you okay now?
punkroxy
was in a car accident the side air bag sent my son flying into my shoulder and broke his right orbital (cheek bone?) but saved his life
darkwyverna
My curtain airbag was the ONLY airbag in the car to NOT deploy, but I still hit my dad pretty good, only with my shoulder not my cheek.
mutedia
holy shit people can't take a joke... bunch of ninnies
NaomiDeplume
I'm always amazed how often TV shows and movies show people in cars without seatbelts. It's just non-negotiable for most people.
kam3855
I was just in an accident and the seat belt saved my mom from going through the windshield as well as the airbag helping.
pandorafalters
I was already settling back into my seat (seatbelts, yo!) when the airbag smashed my glasses off. Worse than a goalie return to the face.
darkwyverna
Yeah, they have to be super precise or they can do damage, but more often than not they're life savers.
Ragnarf
I agree you should wear your seat belt, but I'm alive today because I wasn't wearing mine in a bad crash when I was 16.
almostsomething182
I'm pretty sure you would've been alive if you had worn it
MohamedAlsaidi
Describe the accident. I have never heard of an accident in which someone lived due to not wearing their seatbelt.
Ragnarf
The truck I was driving rolled several times and the roof above the drivers seat was smashed so bad it was touching the seat. Instead of
Ragnarf
Bring crushed I was tossed around and walked away in fairly good condition.
LurkingGuy
I don't think people are dumb for not wearing seat belts. It's your choice.
DVSBSTrD
Or do, I don't want morons wasting space on my planet any longer than necessary.
cataleap
Oh it's YOUR planet now? Interesting.
DoesYourMomStillHavePizzaBagels
Totally agree. Those who may not be as smart as me for any unknown reason deserve death, as it means I will get a bigger share of MY planet.
DamianWinters
Honestly we need more Natural selection, the population is getting larger and dumber.
draculasamurai
Not how natural selection works
StarrrryNight
Except some poor ambulance and fire people have to take time from dealing with real emergencies to deal with selfish fuckwits.
TemporaryUzername
getting rid of wastes of space is an actual emergency, though.
mutedia
and the first thing you did was comment on an imgur post? wow, priorities
darkwyverna
Just is a retaliative term. It was over 12days ago but I'm still out of sorts/not back to work, and my dad is still in ICU so... yeah just.
mutedia
right, I think people missed that this was a joke... maybe I should use smileys.. I remember someone snapchatting after an accident
cousteau
But there's evidence of some anecdotical cases where those have actually caused damage! /s
darkwyverna
A guy sharing the ICU with my father will never wake up because he went through his windshield. I'm ok with my seat-belt bruising.
DiggerPlease
People are hurt by seatbelt too but they save many more. No safety device will help every situation.
DeathByTeacup
Sister-in-law ended up with a broken clavicle from a seatbelt. Which my husband doesn't seem to understand is better than being dead.
TeenageMutantWarhead
Maybe if you rested your face on it; as far as i know, those things can cause damage if you rest your thinking bowl or stuff on them 1/?
TeenageMutantWarhead
Cause they are blown open when deployed, but if you sit in a normal position there should be no harm cause you're far enough away 2/?
TeenageMutantWarhead
from the plastic covering the airbag and thus dont get hit by it when it deploys. I hope that's right, correct me if not :) 3/3
almostsomething182
I can double confirm, you're right. I've never been hurt by an airbag, 2 have shown up unexpectedly on me
KGRider
What idiot thinks an airbag will kill him? Uhh don't you think they tested that out before they started putting them in every single car?
FeaurieVladskovitz
Shhhhh... Let nature run its course.
TheLoneSithDoge
Uncle died from his hairbag it went off too late and basically exploded the front of his face
CPTNNemo
technically, it can kill you, but your forehead suddenly meeting the wheel is a lot worse
FajitaPrinceofAllMexicans
They can cause injury, but that's a better trade off than dying.
stayawhilestayforever
Yes! They test everything; like this smartphone I keep next to my testicles.
MerToo
Airbags can totally kill you. You're just far more likely to die in a crash without an airbag to save you, so we use them.
DapperButtSlapper
This what happens to things in the way of the airbag.
IAlwaysUpvoteRickAndMorty
Never reaching down to deal with an itch in a car again
DapperButtSlapper
Finally your mind and body will be truly united
cousteau
Yes, one question. How would the watermelon end if the airbag didn't open at all?
almostsomething182
Falling from 2 feet? Fine. Going 50-0 like in a major accident? Worse than the late deployment
ScottKB24
The watermelon was already smashed before the airbag deployed so of course the pressure of it will cause it to blow the melon away
BachelorGourmet
That's the point though.
cousteau
Should repeat this with the airbag developing 1 second late, and it developing with an intact melon on top, to see what really breaks it.
DapperButtSlapper
You seen the vids of people sitting on airbags and having them deploy? The airbag throws them partially through the ceiling.
DapperButtSlapper
Your head smacks the dash, fractures, air bag deploys, your brain is mush.
PerrinAybara564
At best, really fucking bad headache. At worst, you're dead son
Ironblitz
1. watermelons are used as a very loose analog of the human head (not great, but close enough) 2. airbags EXPLODE out to cushion in time. 3.
Ironblitz
3. I have been drinking. But like i tell my students and their parents (and that head-up-her-ass principal), it doesn't mean I'm wrong.
Knilore
And the smell and smoke makes your dazed ass think the car is going to explode from driving into a ditch.
DotheBabyIsaac
^Haha, this. Had a deer run out last second, only caught the corner of bumper, but after airbag for split sec I was like 'Am I in heaven?'
CoRektiveAction
It's not the airbag, it's what's in the way of the airbag.
benisoyylmao
"hurrrr it not dae fall dat kill u it LANDING KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!12213134567890-98765432!!!!! HURRRRRRRR"
cousteau
Are you having a stroke?
benisoyylmao
i am depicting an accurate representation of the faggots who offer this kind of inane trivia.
jontaylor07
People have been killed by airbags. My cousin was killed by a seat belt. It's an odds thing. Nothing is really safe.
ShinyObject
Airbags are dangerous. High-speed collisions without airbags are dangerous-er.
MostObviousName
I'm highly allergic to latex. I'm not dumb enough to remove them from my car, but I imagine latex powder getting into wounds being iffy.
StarrrryNight
He looks like the libertarian dipstick sort that probably thinks Airbags are a govt conspiracy suppressing his freedom to die like a moron.
BlamableMonkey
Yep. I've taken an airbag to the face. Still here.
cousteau
Did you used to be an adventurer before?
almostsomething182
Twice for me. Pretty sure I'm still alive.
almostsomething182
And I'm 6 foot, just outside this "magical safety range"
megleon
I'm short so I sit close to the wheel. Got in an accident, airbags destroyed me. Would never disable them - damage would be worse without em
SirKnightLurk
the same idiot that thinks vaccines cause autism.
cousteau
Is autism where you drive autos?
tachikaze316
Or that the brace position is designed to kill plane passengers cleanly and quickly.
giveszerofox
I suggest you use your Google Fu and search for Takata Airbags
GetSchwifty
almostsomething182
Also not true. Good ol simpsons, spreading misinformation.
Axewhipe
Seatbelt shmeatbelts
cousteau
Maybe he drives with his feet on the dashboard as a norm?
IAmDrBanner
They don't understand testing. You could say they are a... testing dummy.
cogs
They are complementary to seat belts. If you're unbelted and the airbags deploy, it's sufficient to cause fatal injuries.
WhatIsYourSpaghettiPolicy
If you're not wearing a seatbelt in a crash that would cause an airbag to go off you're probably going through the windshield anyway
cogs
Airbags are designed to be deployed in fixed-barrier frontal collisions at 8-14 mph.
ridge
Maybe his car has Takata airbags?
ChronicD
The millions of recalled vehicles worldwide with faulty airbags that have literally killed several people? Just a thought.
astrangehop
They put auto shoulder belts in in the nineties. Those tend to snap off heads if you have no lap belt.
GodApollo
They can kill you, like he said they come out over 100 mph so brace yourself.
viila
Don't brace yourself. Impacts on a slack body cause significantly less damage than on tensed.
GodApollo
When i mean brace yourself i mean get into a good position so you dont get killed by the airbag.
SupraLove
My sister once told me she was glad the airbag light was on in her car bc she would rather it not deploy bc she heard that it "hurts"......
viila
Tell her that the steering wheel hurts more.
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railsification
I had one go off when we were in an event and it smashed the helmet visor.
almostsomething182
Well I've personally had 2 accidents, and haven't had a single broken anything.
megleon
Agreed. I got a concussion from mine as well as some nasty burns that left scars
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cousteau
Can we say this was BECAUSE of the airbag? As in, this wouldn't have happened without an airbag?
ashbee
Airbags don't prevent injury they change the mechanism. Better a broken nose than a crushed frontal lobe.
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cousteau
Hmm… maybe headrests should have airbags as well (which deploy *after* the main one)
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StarrrryNight
All of which are more preferable to death.
DVSBSTrD
Didn't have his seat-belt on properly?
GoCorral
Air bags are absolutely necessary if you aren't wearing seatbelt. With seatbelt, they will keep you alive, but guarantee am injury.
whatseventhepointt
Bullshit. They don't guarantee an injury at all.
GoCorral
http://m.emj.bmj.com/content/19/6/490.full
VaccinatedCollegeKid
Had a friend who wouldn't wear a seatbelt a because "I didn't wear one while in Peru and nothing happened"
DVSBSTrD
*Had.
zhukoz
#Dr John Nash & his wife, case in point
CoolHandRK
I love the "What if my car goes underwater and I cant get out b/c of the seatbelt." people.
Knilore
I worked with a guy who didn't wear his because his brother died in a wreck BECAUSE of the seatbelt. Only 99% safe option is not driving.
AkiyamaRuss
Reminds me of the John Plivee gun control post. "Youre saying unless it stops 100% of shootings its not worth it"
artbyraincoats
Well, the fact the population of gun owners shifts from mostly law abiding citizens, to only criminals makes up for the low numbers. 1/3
artbyraincoats
The most convincing argument against gun ownership control is the fact countries with those laws tend to have more incidents of2/3
stygyan
If you don't use a seatbelt in a third world country and don't die, it's maybe because you don't really need it.
StubbornViking
*Obviously* Just like if I don't have a rabies vaccine and I don't get rabies, we clearly don't need the vaccine for anything. Right?
stygyan
Have you seen how they drive in third world countries?
IamMelonLordeYaYaYa
Peru isn't a third world country. Any country where most people have cars is likely not third world
Lowlsqwid
What are you talking about vaccines cause autism!?
StubbornViking
You haven't heard?!?! My neighbor told me about this article she read online about it. Can you believe that give those to our kids???
CobraDBlade
They test them assuming you are between 5'7"-5'11" and weigh no more than 170lbs. If you're outside that, get fucked.
PornhubsFirstTree
I'm 5-11 and just puked. So I'm good
MGM93
You seem to be suggesting that airbags are only intended to work for a height range of 4 inches so I'm gonna assume you're a fucking idiot
Billywonderful
No he's suggesting they are only tested for a height range of 4 inches. They are set for average sized people because that is efficient...
RobertNAdams
So if you're bigger than that, what happens? It just seductively caresses you?
almostsomething182
I guess it wouldn't do its job good enough? Still better than nothing.
staralixstar
Okay. But I've been in an accident where my airbag deployed. 5'3", 110 lbs at the time. Still alive. Soooo???
solecynic
And people survive getting shot in the head, but this is flawed logic.
gringissimo
Yeah I'm gonna need a source on that one. Has the stink of an urban myth.
miraglo
It's an actual warning in Mitsubishi Car Manuals (yes I read mine, I locked my steering wheel as an inexperienced learner)
DVSBSTrD
You should look-up why they don't allow kids in booster seats to ride in the front anymore.
MonteBurns
Except the guy questioning isn't talking about kids. Why are there so many people who don't get this?!? 160 pounds SHOULD NOT be your small
cogs
Ever wonder why the passenger airbag auto-disables if there's only a light weight on the seat? So it won't kill a child.
MonteBurns
170 pounds isn't a child. Also don't act like its a high weight- mine turns on at ~20 pounds. Yes, they can be dangerous but to act like
cogs
Advanced airbags are disabled below a certain weight, and then up to another are at a reduced discharge.
MonteBurns
They're only safe in that range is BULLSHIT.
pagliacci323
Whelp I am fucked. I'm 6'1" and 260lb
GandalfsLawyer
6'3" 155, I'm boned
ratchethatchet
You'll just snap in half like a twig
CobraDBlade
Me too, 5'9" with short legs and 250lb so I sit super close to the wheel. My strategy is to not crash.
MGM93
The weight is probably more likely to kill you than a mismatch with an airbag..
CobraDBlade
Yeah. I know. I've already started doing things to take care of that.