To everyone who Upvotes in usersub
MRW there is a kitty on the road
MRW my friends kid said he sat his popsicle down and it melted on my new couch
I have severe depression, so its kind of an accomplishment
MRW im about 5 minutes in to pornhub and chill
MRW one of my friends is telling someone else something funny i did
MRW I go anywhere
oh my
MRW someone asks me how do i like my wings
MRW someone ask me to do my impression of the munchkins from the wizard of oz
MRW ive gained a few and am trying to get my pants over my butt
MRW i get money on my bday
MRW im trying my hardest to get my wife to........arrive
MRW i see Tom Bradys wife
MRW someone asks me what do i think about the movie the exorsist
MRW i finally made the FP after saying User sub is where its at!
MRW my kids want to eat cereal for supper
MRW when buds asked me what i did all weekend
damnit babou
MRW someone ask me if im holding a fucking bible
MRW my older brother and his friends were playing video games and wouldnt let me play
OH, pics of yourself in your undies? well here you go.....
MRW my friend is doing a cross word and axe for a 5 letter word that means to strike forcefully that starts with a W
Ba Dum Tiss *OC ...... wait is it OC if you use a meme, but made the joke yourself? someone enlighten me
you will take this hand and you will like it!!!
MRW i go to the doctor for constipation and he ask me what my problem is
its not racist if its true
Short stories by Jack Handy.....
Short stories by Jack Handy.....
Short stories by Jack handy
Short stories by Jack Handy.....
MRW i go somewhere with my friend and she starts talking to people i dont know
mrw im asked to cook anything not involving the microwave
MRW someone ask me what Stephen King movies ive saw
MRW i get a new fleece jacket
MRW someone ask me what my favorite Shirley & Co song is
How i imagine everyone in states that are use to the snow
MRW i need TP for my bunghole
MRW i went down to Georgia lookin for some souls to steal
mrw someone asks who said the secret word
MRW someone i cant stand makes a joke
MRW my boss is chewing me out, but murder is illegal
MRW i searched for DICK BUTT gifs, instead of DICKBUTT gifs
MRW my wife asks me what im going to do to her in bed later
MRW i find super hot gifs of Kari byron
Maybe if i shove it in her face she will touch it...... nope
MRW the wife says her parents are stopping by
when me and my bud spot the same hot chick
Its 11 months away, but this is the gif i will be using on my cake day
MRW someone ask me why i want to visit Colorado so damn bad
MRW im browsing user sub and ive had a few drinks and everything is funny
MRW my ex drops by and says i should clean up a lil bit
MRW im browsing usersub late at night
When someone ask me what D&D is all about
MRW i take a dump so massive i have to look at my own work
MRW when a female coworker wants me to drop what im doing to come lift something heavy for her
What i said when someone asked if a dog was a girl or boy
MRW my wife drops her bath towel
MRW my friends ask me to play Kings Circle or Pong
MRW im trying to push out a stubborn turd