SmackGod

41387 pts ยท December 17, 2015


HI, my name is Tom and im an alcoholic....... Im just an Older millennial, so yea im completely worthless just a guy, i like stuff and things Im from Alabama, and i can spell and read, so ive got that going for me, which is nice.

To everyone who Upvotes in usersub

Points 32
Comments 4
Views 3410

MRW there is a kitty on the road

Points 12
Comments 1
Views 700

MRW my friends kid said he sat his popsicle down and it melted on my new couch

Points 0
Comments 2
Views 437

I have severe depression, so its kind of an accomplishment

Points 20
Comments 5
Views 98

MRW im about 5 minutes in to pornhub and chill

Points 3
Comments 4
Views 1604

MRW one of my friends is telling someone else something funny i did

Points 7
Comments 1
Views 225

MRW I go anywhere

Points 29
Comments 8
Views 274

oh my

Points 27
Comments 8
Views 266

MRW someone asks me how do i like my wings

Points 5
Comments 0
Views 92

MRW someone ask me to do my impression of the munchkins from the wizard of oz

Points 61
Comments 7
Views 9140

MRW ive gained a few and am trying to get my pants over my butt

Points 43
Comments 8
Views 200

MRW i get money on my bday

Points 10
Comments 7
Views 29283

MRW im trying my hardest to get my wife to........arrive

Points 24
Comments 20
Views 350

MRW i see Tom Bradys wife

Points 13
Comments 12
Views 396

MRW someone asks me what do i think about the movie the exorsist

Points 17
Comments 3
Views 326

MRW i finally made the FP after saying User sub is where its at!

Points -2
Comments 0
Views 73

MRW my kids want to eat cereal for supper

Points 39
Comments 4
Views 27847

MRW when buds asked me what i did all weekend

Points 8
Comments 1
Views 315

damnit babou

Points 57
Comments 8
Views 44388

MRW someone ask me if im holding a fucking bible

Points 6
Comments 2
Views 30885

MRW my older brother and his friends were playing video games and wouldnt let me play

Points 5
Comments 2
Views 2886

OH, pics of yourself in your undies? well here you go.....

Points 44
Comments 3
Views 3720

MRW my friend is doing a cross word and axe for a 5 letter word that means to strike forcefully that starts with a W

Points 1
Comments 6
Views 299

Ba Dum Tiss *OC ...... wait is it OC if you use a meme, but made the joke yourself? someone enlighten me

Points 5
Comments 3
Views 256

you will take this hand and you will like it!!!

Points 13
Comments 11
Views 77

MRW i go to the doctor for constipation and he ask me what my problem is

Points 66
Comments 4
Views 266

its not racist if its true

Points 12
Comments 0
Views 86

Short stories by Jack Handy.....

Points 7
Comments 0
Views 160

Short stories by Jack Handy.....

Points 0
Comments 0
Views 141

Short stories by Jack handy

Points 6
Comments 1
Views 159

Short stories by Jack Handy.....

Points 5
Comments 2
Views 149

MRW i go somewhere with my friend and she starts talking to people i dont know

Points 5486
Comments 108
Views 68494

mrw im asked to cook anything not involving the microwave

Points 7
Comments 2
Views 298

MRW someone ask me what Stephen King movies ive saw

Points 9
Comments 2
Views 134

MRW i get a new fleece jacket

Points 24
Comments 2
Views 267

MRW someone ask me what my favorite Shirley & Co song is

Points -6
Comments 2
Views 365

How i imagine everyone in states that are use to the snow

Points 1379
Comments 116
Views 27930

MRW i need TP for my bunghole

Points 108
Comments 15
Views 296915

MRW i went down to Georgia lookin for some souls to steal

Points 1687
Comments 74
Views 25908

mrw someone asks who said the secret word

Points 13
Comments 4
Views 2051

MRW someone i cant stand makes a joke

Points 1222
Comments 62
Views 29040

MRW my boss is chewing me out, but murder is illegal

Points 11
Comments 5
Views 344

MRW i searched for DICK BUTT gifs, instead of DICKBUTT gifs

Points 12
Comments 9
Views 1161

MRW my wife asks me what im going to do to her in bed later

Points 1314
Comments 35
Views 19960

MRW i find super hot gifs of Kari byron

Points 52
Comments 14
Views 161165

Maybe if i shove it in her face she will touch it...... nope

Points 24
Comments 5
Views 597

MRW the wife says her parents are stopping by

Points 11
Comments 4
Views 289

when me and my bud spot the same hot chick

Points 1
Comments 1
Views 240

Its 11 months away, but this is the gif i will be using on my cake day

Points 9
Comments 3
Views 320

MRW someone ask me why i want to visit Colorado so damn bad

Points 6
Comments 7
Views 190

MRW im browsing user sub and ive had a few drinks and everything is funny

Points 26
Comments 3
Views 13275

MRW my ex drops by and says i should clean up a lil bit

Points 12
Comments 5
Views 176

MRW im browsing usersub late at night

Points 37
Comments 2
Views 213

When someone ask me what D&D is all about

Points 27
Comments 7
Views 271

MRW i take a dump so massive i have to look at my own work

Points -4
Comments 2
Views 55

MRW when a female coworker wants me to drop what im doing to come lift something heavy for her

Points 22
Comments 23
Views 1602

What i said when someone asked if a dog was a girl or boy

Points 7
Comments 6
Views 147

MRW my wife drops her bath towel

Points 32
Comments 4
Views 414

MRW my friends ask me to play Kings Circle or Pong

Points 3
Comments 3
Views 84

MRW im trying to push out a stubborn turd

Points 12
Comments 16
Views 18510
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