To everyone who Upvotes in usersub
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MRW there is a kitty on the road
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MRW my friends kid said he sat his popsicle down and it melted on my new couch
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I have severe depression, so its kind of an accomplishment
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MRW im about 5 minutes in to pornhub and chill
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MRW one of my friends is telling someone else something funny i did
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MRW I go anywhere
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oh my
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MRW someone asks me how do i like my wings
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MRW someone ask me to do my impression of the munchkins from the wizard of oz
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MRW ive gained a few and am trying to get my pants over my butt
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MRW i get money on my bday
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MRW im trying my hardest to get my wife to........arrive
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MRW i see Tom Bradys wife
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MRW someone asks me what do i think about the movie the exorsist
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MRW i finally made the FP after saying User sub is where its at!
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MRW my kids want to eat cereal for supper
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MRW when buds asked me what i did all weekend
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damnit babou
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MRW someone ask me if im holding a fucking bible
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MRW my older brother and his friends were playing video games and wouldnt let me play
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OH, pics of yourself in your undies? well here you go.....
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MRW my friend is doing a cross word and axe for a 5 letter word that means to strike forcefully that starts with a W
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Ba Dum Tiss *OC ...... wait is it OC if you use a meme, but made the joke yourself? someone enlighten me
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you will take this hand and you will like it!!!
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MRW i go to the doctor for constipation and he ask me what my problem is
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its not racist if its true
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Short stories by Jack Handy.....
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Short stories by Jack Handy.....
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Short stories by Jack handy
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Short stories by Jack Handy.....
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MRW i go somewhere with my friend and she starts talking to people i dont know
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mrw im asked to cook anything not involving the microwave
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MRW someone ask me what Stephen King movies ive saw
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MRW i get a new fleece jacket
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MRW someone ask me what my favorite Shirley & Co song is
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How i imagine everyone in states that are use to the snow
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MRW i need TP for my bunghole
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MRW i went down to Georgia lookin for some souls to steal
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mrw someone asks who said the secret word
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MRW someone i cant stand makes a joke
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MRW my boss is chewing me out, but murder is illegal
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MRW i searched for DICK BUTT gifs, instead of DICKBUTT gifs
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MRW my wife asks me what im going to do to her in bed later
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MRW i find super hot gifs of Kari byron
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Maybe if i shove it in her face she will touch it...... nope
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MRW the wife says her parents are stopping by
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when me and my bud spot the same hot chick
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Its 11 months away, but this is the gif i will be using on my cake day
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MRW someone ask me why i want to visit Colorado so damn bad
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MRW im browsing user sub and ive had a few drinks and everything is funny
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MRW my ex drops by and says i should clean up a lil bit
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MRW im browsing usersub late at night
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When someone ask me what D&D is all about
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MRW i take a dump so massive i have to look at my own work
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MRW when a female coworker wants me to drop what im doing to come lift something heavy for her
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What i said when someone asked if a dog was a girl or boy
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MRW my wife drops her bath towel
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MRW my friends ask me to play Kings Circle or Pong
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MRW im trying to push out a stubborn turd
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