SovietCabbage

6281 pts ยท December 1, 2013


Umm, oh jeez I'm totally unprepared I didn't write a speech or anything! Oh uh so... oh no (sweating intensely) I, uh *ahem* So um, hello everyone. M-my name is umm CovietSabage and, wait that's not right, sorry! I'm uh, not very umm (high pitched microphone squeak) those spotlights are really bright ha ha ha...(audience remains silent) *gulp* yeah, um s-so I like uh music.. and um I like aniMALS (leans to close to microphone knocking it off podium.) (overreact, pushing papers, pens off the podium) Woops! clumsy me! lemme j-just get that- (spills bottle of water everywhere) Oh no! sorry! I'm so sorry! (attempts to recover microphone but gets chord caught on foot pulling the podium onto the floor.) OH! oh gosh! oh jeez! I'm sorry! I'm so- (Water engulfs microphone and begins violently sparking, podium and curtains erupt in flames.) OH! OH! OH NO I'M SO SORRY! OH NONONONO SOMEBODY HELP! PLEASE! OH GOD! (flames quickly spread and audience looks on with silent contempt as the blazing inferno devours the stage.) (frantically search for a fire extinguisher, but there are none.) (begin stomping on the papers fallen from the podium now covered in fire, only to spread them further.) (pant leg catches fire and begin flailing around stage, waving arms frantically. The grim faced audience slowly dissipates one by one until there is no one left seated and the lights fade to black)

Page Counts of Popular Book Series and the Amount of Time It Took to Finish Them [Made Better!]

Points 60
Comments 25
Views 2834

When im drunk and the pizza guy finally arrives

Points 250
Comments 20
Views 798

I laughed harder than I should have

Points 17
Comments 1
Views 482

Couldn't get NASA approved eclipse glasses, but I aint missing this shit

Points 5
Comments 2
Views 135

Pt.3 The Wheel Of Time: The Forsaken

Points 63
Comments 8
Views 2330

Dark Souls 3's AMAZING Soundtrack

Points 42
Comments 6
Views 1107

Need help, first time building a PC!

Points 8
Comments 21
Views 1363

Damn it ray

Points 13
Comments 2
Views 82

sugnid gib uoy sdrawkcab siht daer uoy

Points 2
Comments 8
Views 1758

Solaire of Astora

Points 29
Comments 11
Views 1229

Thank you eaglehawk712 for my self portrait

Points 10
Comments 6
Views 119

With the new Smash-bros game, I can finally play as my favorite character!

Points 0
Comments 0
Views 43

The Wheel of Time Pt.1: The One Power

Points 26
Comments 5
Views 1284

unbelievable

Points 30
Comments 9
Views 82

Pt.2 The Wheel Of Time: Shadowspawn

Points 62
Comments 4
Views 2407

Gettin real sick of your shit phone...

Points 15
Comments 44
Views 1105

College Tumbleweed

Points 25
Comments 5
Views 104

Pt.1 The Wheel Of Time: The One Power

Points 124
Comments 25
Views 3258

Capitalism

Points 11
Comments 3
Views 364

Wish me luck on my final exam

Points 7
Comments 5
Views 63

Laughed so hard I almost slipped

Points 3
Comments 2
Views 44

Trying to clear that first step coming home from the bar

Points 20
Comments 10
Views 417

Happy Birthday Darksouls 2! (Total death count)

Points 27
Comments 3
Views 1399

The greatest rendition of HP hands down.

Points 5
Comments 2
Views 3093
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